Permission: The Perversion Trilogy, Book Three

by Frazier, T. M.

  “I’m so sorry, EJ,” Gabby sobs.

  I hug her tightly around her shoulders, pulling her into my chest. I kiss her hair. “Stop apologizing. It’s not your fault. I don’t blame you for any of this.”

  “But— “

  “Gabriella Ramos,” I blurt. I take her face in my hands and stare deeply into her huge dark eyes. “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”

  Her lips turn upward slightly. She sniffles. “Erich Segal, American writer.”

  “Nailed it,” I chuckle. “But, seriously. Promise me, right here and right now, that you’re done apologizing. I’m tired of hearing it and thinking it. There’s nothing for you to be sorry about. Nothing. Now, promise me.”

  “I’ll try,” Gabby says with a small nod.

  “You know what they say about trying?” I return her smile and wipe the tears off her cheek with my thumb.

  “Things don’t always work the first time, but keep trying,” she answers.

  “And who— “I start to ask.

  “Donald Duck.”

  All heads swing to a smug-looking Sandy.

  Gabby wrinkles her nose. “How did you know that?”

  He shrugs and flashes her a megawatt grin.

  “Don’t let the idiot fool you,” Grim warns Gabby. “He’s kind of a genius.”

  “Where is Mona now?” Gabby asks.

  “I don’t know.” I answer honestly.

  “Uhhh…” Sandy starts, biting his lip. He slowly raises his hand. “I know.”

  “You do?” Gabby and I ask at the same time.

  I lean across the bed to Sandy. “Where?”

  Grim speaks for the first time since we arrived in Gabby’s room. “She’s here.”

  Eight

  Grim

  “Is this what you really want to do?” I ask Tricks as we walk from the reservation hospital to the war room.

  “I don’t want to. I have to,” she corrects.

  “She showed up here at the hospital only a few minutes after I brought Gabby in. She seemed apologetic. I don’t know if it’s bullshit or if she’s telling the truth.” We stop at the door to the war room, and I turn Tricks to face me. “Look at me.”

  She does, but her face is unreadable. She looks lost in thought. “What you have to ask yourself right now, before you go in there, is this: does it make a difference to you if Mona’s truly sorry? Will it change what you want the outcome to be?”

  “Does it matter what I decide?”

  I shake my head. “Not to me. It has to matter to you. You have to know what you want to get out of this before you take a step inside that door. Whether it’s revenge, or salvation. Trust me, it makes all the difference to how you will feel when you walk back out.”

  She looks at the door and then back to me. “Okay. I’m ready.”

  “Just like that?” I ask.

  “Just like that,” she repeats, looking to the door.

  I open it and follow her inside. Rollo is perched at the edge of the table, reading a book.

  “You know how to read?” I tease.

  “Don’t be jealous. Wuthering Heights is the greatest book of all time.”

  I raise my eyebrows and wait for him to finish.

  Rollo closes the book and sets it on the table. “Or so Trinity’s Tinder profile states. It also says she used to be a gymnast and can tie her legs behind her head like a pretzel.”

  “And the truth comes out.”

  “Why hello there, Mrs. Grim Reaper,” he says to Tricks, adding a dramatic bow.

  She offers Rollo a smile. “Hi, I’m Emma Jean Parish,” she introduces, reminding me of the first time we met.

  Rollo bites his lip, looking at her in a way that makes me want to punch him in the face. She holds out her hand to shake, but the motherfucker picks her up and embraces her in a tight hug. “I’m glad to see you’re okay. Grim had us worried about you for a while. You should have seen him. He was freaking the fuck—"

  “Put her down,” I growl.

  Rollo places her back on the floor and raises his hands. “Just being friendly with the queen of Bedlam is all, Boss” he says, flashing her a wink.

  My murderous thoughts fade as he steps aside to reveal Mona, sitting at the long end of the table, her wrists bound to the chair.

  Tricks freezes.

  I lean down and whisper in her ear. “You don’t have to say anything to her. We can leave if you want.”

  She shakes her head and takes a deep breath. “No, I need to say something to her.”

  I stand back as Tricks walks to Mona, pulls out the chair and takes a seat next to her. She, then, yanks on Mona’s chair, forcing Mona to face her.

  “Knife,” she demands holding up her hand.

  I remove my blade from the sheath under my pant leg and walk over to her, setting it in Tricks’s outstretched hand.

  “Thank you, my love,” she says, never taking her eyes off Mona as she closes her hand around the handle of the blade.

  My love. Those two words make my heart stutter like I’ve stuck my finger in an electric socket. It forces me to cough into my fist. Tricks looks over her shoulder to make sure I’m okay. I give her the nod. She turns back around to face Mona. Making a show of spinning the blade around her hand, catching the fluorescent light above.

  “You’re like a love-sick school boy, ain’t ya, Boss?” Rollo whispers. He’s standing next to me against the wall, watching Tricks in action. He continues, “I can see why. Beautiful, cool as fuck, puts up with your shit. Likes knives.”

  Tricks holds up the blade and leans in toward her former friend. With her free hand, she rips the gag from Mona’s mouth.

  My stuttering chest swells with pride.

  “Shut the fuck up, or I’ll use that blade on you when she’s done with it,” I hiss.

  “Fair enough.” Rollo waits three seconds before elbowing me in the ribs. “Boss? Uh…what do you think your ole lady is gonna to do with that blade?”

  I watch as the fear grows in Mona’s eyes. Her mouth falls open.

  “Honestly?” I ask. “I have no fucking idea.” We both watch as Tricks twirls the handle of the knife on Mona’s knee, toying with her fear. “But, I can’t wait to find out.”

  “EJ, I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry,” Mona says, her face pales. “I have no excuse. I had nothing, no one. Just like you.”

  Tricks scoffs. “You had nothing, just like I had nothing?” she repeats Mona’s words as a question. I can’t take my eyes off her. She’s always been the most beautiful girl in the world, but right now, with her taking control of the situation, showing her strength with every movement, she’s living, breathing sex.

  I adjust my position against the wall in an attempt to make my raging cock heel.

  “Let’s get something straight right the fuck now, Mona. You went to Los Muertos willingly to help Marco hurt me. You bought into his lies. Gabby and I were taken there as kids and threatened every day with death or being sold on the streets. We weren’t allowed to go to school. We weren’t allowed to talk to anyone. We were wiped from the system like we didn’t exist and then treated like we didn’t exist. We weren’t kids or even people. We were dogs. And when we wouldn’t heel, they brought you in, and it makes sense. You already hated me. It couldn’t have been too hard to turn you against me.”

  “I never hated you. I just hated the way I felt. Like you and Gabby were sisters, and I was the outsider. Please, let me see her.”

  “I’m not letting you anywhere near her until she tells me she wants to see you. You felt like an outsider because you made yourself an outsider. We never excluded you. You just refused to join us. And on the rare occasion you did, you brought your misery with you.” I shake my head. “I’m not going to apologize to you. We were kids, Mona. Kids. We all had fucked up childhoods. You want to know what the real difference is between me and you?”

  “No,” she shakes her head.

  “You’ve let the past consume you while I won
’t let it define who I am.”

  Mona shuts her eyes. “I know.”

  “We were all victims.” Tricks says. “I just never thought, in a million years, I’d be your victim.”

  Tricks stabs the knife into the table.

  Mona continues on a shaky voice. “I didn’t know I was capable of such...horrible things. But every time I did them, Marco praised me. For studying psychology, I was so easily duped into becoming a weapon for my brother to wield as he saw fit.” Mona’s bottom lip quivers. “I let my jealousy cloud everything and my want for a family fuck up everything. I trusted my brother when I should have trusted you and Gabby.” She lowers her voice to a whisper. “I love you, you know. I always have. You and Gabriella. I may have lost my way for a while, but I know now. You two are everything to me.”

  Tricks pulls the blade from the wood and leans over Mona. “No,” she hisses. “We were everything to you. We’re dead to you now, just like you planned.”

  “No!” Mona begins to argue. Tricks shoves the gag back into her mouth and walks up to where Rollo and I are standing against the wall. I wish we were alone. Naked. I want to worship every part of her like the queen she is.

  We stare at each other. The connection between us explodes like a transformer on a utility pole.

  Rollo clears his throat. “What do you want me to do with her?”’ He glances over at Mona.

  I look to Tricks. “It’s your call.”

  She thinks for a moment, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’ll talk to Gabby. We’ll decide together.”

  I nod. “Rollo, stay with her for now. Don’t let the bitch out of your sight.”

  “Mmmffffffffmmmmmm,” Mona cries from behind her gag.

  Tricks spares Mona one last glance before we walk to the door.

  “Whether you live or die.”

  Nine

  Emma Jean

  I don’t remember going to sleep. Once my exhaustion took hold, I was done for. I wake wearing nothing but a Bedlam Brotherhood t-shirt. I look around for Grim, but he’s not around. There’s a note on the pillow beside me in the indent where he’d slept.

  Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power.”

  – Lao Tzu

  I grin at Grim’s use of the quote and hold the note to my chest.

  “It’s true, you know,” Grim says, his massive body taking up every inch of the doorway. His jeans are slung low. He’s shirtless as usual but devoid of the hooded jacket. “I’ve never known anyone like you. Beautiful. Smart. Cunning. Strong. I’ve never been proud of anyone before. But last night…I was so fucking proud of you. You are powerful beyond measure.” He stalks toward the bed. His lean muscles flex under his beautifully tattooed skin.

  He pulls me into a sitting position and tangles his fingers in my hair. His lips barely touch mine in a teasing kiss, and I moan at the contact, but I quickly pull away.

  “What’s wrong?” he asks, breathing hard.

  I cover my mouth and mumble behind my hand. “I haven’t brushed my teeth yet.”

  He laughs and lifts me from the bed. “Then, to the shower we go.” He takes a step, then winces.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Ah, it’s nothing,” he says. The wince is gone, but he’s got a slight limp I hadn’t noticed the night before.

  “No, it’s not nothing. What the fuck happened?”

  “I was shot.”

  I gasp, remembering one of the task force agents, or Callum’s men, or whoever they were, saying that Grim was shot, but after thinking him dead then seeing him alive and well again, the bullet he might have taken slipped my mind.

  Grim has the audacity to chuckle at my concern. I place my hand on my hip flash him my best disapproving look.

  He grabs me by the shoulders. “It was only in the leg, baby. The bullet’s out. It’s barely a scrape. I’ve been hurt worse.”

  I try to ignore the tingling sensation between my legs and my hardening nipples at his calling me baby. “You’ve been—”

  “Hey guys,” Sandy says, popping his head in. “I’m switching places with Rollo for a while. Question, do I bring food out to the chick, or are we starving her out?” he asks. It’s a very matter of fact question. “Yes? No?”

  This is Bedlam, I think to myself. Business as usual. It’s probably not the first time Sandy’s asked that question. It might not be the last.

  “Feed her,” Grim orders. “I want her coherent.”

  Grim looks to me and explains further. “Gabby’s been asking to see Mona all morning. Figured she’ll want to confront her sister and hear her side. She can’t talk if she’s passed out from hunger.”

  I nod.

  “And Marci’s up and about,” Sandy adds. “She wants to leave the hospital against the doctors’ orders. I’m about to head up there.”

  “Shit,” Grim says, rubbing his palm over his stubble which is much longer than I’m used to seeing on him. “I’ll go with you.” He grabs his jacket from the table and plants a kiss on top of my head. “Shower. Eat. I’ll be back soon, and then, I’m taking you somewhere. There’s a team of Irish and an army of our guys surrounding the place. Haze is in the hall.”

  “That I am!” Haze calls out. “Your Bedlam bodyguard at your service, madam.”

  “I’ll meet you in Marci’s room,” Sandy says to Grim. “I gotta do something first.”

  “Like what?” Grim asks.

  Sandy looks to the wall above our heads as he speaks. “Uhhh, I’m… you know…just going to check in on Gabby.” He drums his fingers against his thighs. “You know, just to make sure she doesn’t need anything.” He darts off.

  “That was odd,” I comment, looking at the empty spot in the doorway Sandy just vacated.

  Grim shrugs. “That was Sandy.”

  “You think he has the hots for Gabby?”

  “I know he does. Her and every other pretty girl within a twenty-mile radius.”

  “Fifty, at least,” Haze corrects from the hall.

  Grim shrugs on his jacket.

  “Good luck talking Marci out of leaving,” I say, running my hands over the heat of his chest.

  He shakes his head. “I’m not going to tell her she should stay. Once Marci makes up her mind, the decision is made. There’s no point in arguing.”

  “Then, why are you going?” I ask, knitting my eyebrows.

  Grim plants a quick kiss to my lips. “To make sure she doesn’t take out any of the nurses or burn the damn building down on her way out.”

  Grim

  Marci is dressed in her regular clothes when Sandy and I arrive at her room after he spent a good amount of time talking quietly about god only knows what with Gabby in hers.

  “I assume you two are here to escort me out, so I don’t make a scene,” Marci says.

  “The four of us actually,” Tricks answers, entering the room with Haze.

  “Sorry, I couldn’t stop her,” Haze says.

  Tricks looks up at me apologetically. Her hair is wet from what had to be the world's quickest shower. I hope she, at least, ate something and remind myself to ask her when we’re done at the hospital.

  “She’s not a prisoner,” I say. “She can go wherever she wants.” I take her hand in mine.

  “Damn right, she’s not. She’s family,” Marci says. “Boys?” she asks Sandy and Haze. “Will you go get me the release forms the doctors are taking their sweet time with?’

  Haze and Sandy leave the room.

  I pull Tricks over to the couch. She takes a seat while I help Marci tie the laces on her boots.

  “Thank you, my sweet boy.”

  I tie the last knot as a shadow crosses the doorway.

  I reach for my gun and stand. I turn around just as Agent Lemming steps from the shadows.

  Marci’s eyes go wide. “Callum?”

  I don’t even have time to be shocked that the son of a bitch has the balls to step foot onto the reservation and into Bedlam territory after trying to
kidnap Tricks.

  Before Callum can breathe a word, my gun is aimed and cocked at his head. I’m seething with hatred, and if my girl wasn’t standing in the room, this fucker’s brains would be sliding down the wall behind him.

  Marci shuffles over to Tricks, keeping her protectively behind her.

  “I had a feeling it was all a ruse,” Callum says, his lips curving up at the corners. “Good to see you back in the land of the living.”

  I hold my gun steady. “Thanks, I intend to stay awhile, in case you had other plans.”

  He raises his hands, slowly from his sides. He’s holding something. It’s not a weapon, but a white handkerchief. He dangles it, holding just a corner. He waves it around. “I come in peace. I’m not armed. I’m just here to talk.”

  “So, talk.” I say, not lowering my gun.

  He leans to the side, looking over my shoulder. “I’m here about the girl.”

  “Like hell you are,” I say. There’s no fucking way I’m allowing him anywhere near Tricks since he’d tried to load her onto a plane and take her to fuck knows where.

  “Why? Who is she to you?” Marci asks.

  Callum straightens. “She’s my daughter.” “Bullshit! Why should I fucking believe you?” I ask, holding both my words and my gun steady.

  “I can prove it. Just let me talk to her,” Callum says, his accent thick and Irish.

  I shake my head. “You’ll talk to me first before I let you anywhere near her.”

  “Very well then. By all means. Let us talk.” Callum produces an envelope from his pocket. “And while we talk--” he looks to Tricks once more. “I’d like her to read these. They’re just letters. They ain’t gonna kill her,” he says when I eye them suspiciously.

  Tricks is now behind me. She reaches under my arm and grabs the letters.

  Callum confidently looks to her, then me. “I’m all yours. Lead the way.”

  Ten

  Grim

  I take Callum to the main living area attached to the brothel. Callum takes a seat. I sit beside him at the head of the table, resting my gun on my lap and my hand on my gun.