The Waiting Time

by Margaret Carr

  ‘There will be transport, don’t worry. But right now I’d say you need some rest and time to yourselves, to settle in. Margaret is a bit thoughtless at times but it’s all well meant. I live on the top floor, by the way, and I’ll pick you up at six.’

  ‘Is this all your house, Daddy?’

  Helen came tumbling into the room as he made to leave. He bent down to her level.

  ‘Yes, it is, but I will be upstairs and you and your mummy will be downstairs.’

  ‘Why? I want to be with you as well as Mummy.’

  Jennifer watched the two faces so close together and felt the twist deep down in her heart.

  ‘Helen, I’ve all ready explained that Mummy and Daddy don’t live together any more. When you want to be with me you can come upstairs then when you want to be with Mummy, you can come downstairs.’

  She quite liked this idea and with her head cocked to one side she asked, ‘Will I have a bed upstairs and a bed downstairs?’

  ‘Yes,’ he replied as he stood up, stroking her hair thoughtfully.

  Just for a minute Jenny held her breath, then it was over and he had gone.

  * * *

  Laughter and music greeted them as they stepped out of the car. The house was ranch-style, long with a surrounding deck and a deep basement that looked out over the back yard. Ryder led them through the garage, up a short flight of steps and into a hallway that opened out into a large, wood-panelled lounge with a massive open, stone fireplace beautifully screened with flowers.

  There was a bar at the far end of the room and patio windows leading outside. Helen had already caught a glimpse of her friend, Anna, outside in the garden and was straining to join her.

  ‘Let her go,’ Ryder said, ‘and we’ll find Dan and Margaret.’

  Reluctantly Jenny let go of Helen’s hand and watched the little girl dash off to meet Anna. Together she and Ryder followed and within minutes were spotted by Margaret.

  There were at least forty people in the garden, some prowling the edge of a large table set with food and drinks, others standing in small groups chatting and laughing. One or two were dancing under fairy lanterns hanging from the trees. And through it all a handful of children ran and shouted.

  ‘Have a drink first,’ Margaret said, crooking her finger at a passing waiter. ‘Then you must come and meet the family.’

  The waiter came and took their order and was back in a flash with their glasses balanced on a tray. Margaret guided them across the grass towards the group of people she had been talking to when they had arrived. Ryder immediately fell into conversation with Dan and it was Margaret who was left to introduce Jenny to the company.

  ‘Jennifer, this is my brother-in-law, Wayne, and his wife, Sandra.’

  Jenny smiled and offered a handshake to the overweight man with the bald head and his thin, pale wife.

  ‘They have two boys running around here somewhere,’ Margaret said giving a vague wave over the garden. ‘Bobby and Darren.’

  Time dribbled away and there were more names and more faces. She had lost track of Ryder at the beginning of the evening and only caught glimpses of him in conversation with different people as she was guided around the garden.

  ‘She’s from England, you know.’

  The phrase was ringing through her head as she’d heard it repeatedly used about herself. Whatever it was meant to indicate attracted a multitude of questions every time it was said, and she heard herself answering them in the same repetitious style.

  Jenny feared she wasn’t coming over too well but to be honest she didn’t really care. She was tired, she had a headache and all she wanted to do was crawl into bed. Helen was hyper by the time Ryder gathered them together and made their excuses to Margaret and Dan.

  Jenny sat in the back seat of the car with Helen who by now was being really naughty and couldn’t be trusted to behave herself. Ryder picked her up under one arm as they left the car and climbed the stairs to the apartment. About to pass her to Jenny as they stepped into the hallway, Helen was suddenly violently sick.

  Ryder and Jenny stared at one another in surprise then back to Helen who was hic-cupping and wailing. Grabbing her daughter from Ryder’s rigid grasp Jenny hurried her into the bathroom. When she came out again with Helen wrapped in a towel Ryder had mopped up the floor and was trying to clean the worst of it from his shoulder.

  After putting the little girl to bed she came back into the living-room and offered to wash Ryder’s shirt.

  ‘Don’t bother. It’ll go into the service wash.’

  Jenny was shaking her head.

  ‘It’s not like her to eat herself sick. Perhaps it was the combination of the long journey and everything else.’

  Ryder eased himself away from the sink. The wet patches of his shirt were clinging to his body.

  ‘From the smell, I would say it was alcohol.’

  ‘What?’ Jenny stared at him. ‘My daughter wouldn’t do anything like that.’

  ‘No, but those two brats of Wayne’s would.’

  This was the last straw for Jenny and she erupted angrily.

  ‘What have you done? You sneered at our home, went behind my back to promise my daughter she could come and live here, and she hasn’t been here a full day and already she’s been poisoned with alcohol. What kind of upbringing would you call this?’

  Her voice had gradually risen until she now became aware that she was near screaming point. She stopped suddenly. Her head was threatening to split open and her chest heaved with every breath as she tried to calm herself. He raised a questioning eyebrow then turned and left.

  * * *

  In the morning there was an envelope slipped under the door. Inside was a note and an application for a driving licence. The questionnaire had been filled out and only her signature and photograph were required. The note said he’d call for it that evening when he would explain about her job and Helen’s entry into the kindergarten. If there was anything else she needed he’d give her a lift down to the store.

  Jenny bit her lip as she read. She was ashamed of her outburst the night before yet at the same time reluctant to accept that she would have to apologise to him that evening. Margaret Mitchell really had been generous with the food buying and Jenny was convinced that she wouldn’t have to shop for at least a week.

  Helen was much better this morning. After helping Jenny unpack their belongings and put them away she ate a little toast and fruit and slept for two hours although she had insisted she wasn’t tired.

  Later, she was splashing around in the swimming pool while Jenny lay on a lounger nearby, an open book alongside her. She wasn’t reading. Her mind was spread out like feelers testing her new environment. She must make a list of all the questions she would ask Ryder when he came. Obviously he meant her to drive. She had signed the form and cut up a photograph to supply the picture required. But how much was all this costing? She couldn’t be beholden to him. The independence she had struggled for must still be her ultimate aim.

  It was six o’clock when he appeared. Helen had just finished her supper and was watching television before going to bed.

  ‘Look, Daddy, I can watch cartoons whenever I like.’

  She was curled up in the corner of the settee. Ryder sat down beside her. ‘And what have you been doing today?’

  ‘I’ve been swimming, haven’t I, Mummy? And we met Christopher and Sally Ann and their mummy and grandma.’

  He looked up at Jenny as she came through the kitchen doorway. ‘They live across the green. Lenners, she said the name was.’ He nodded.

  ‘Yes, he’s a pilot for a small firm over at Hartford.’

  ‘They were very friendly. The little boy is a year older than Helen while the girl’s not yet three. I’m making some dinner. Will you stay?’

  A twist of a smile crossed his mouth.

  ‘No, thanks. I had a heavy business lunch until three. By the way, you have an interview at the kindergarten next week, ten thirty on Tuesday, with a
Mrs Doherty. Is there anything else you want to ask me?’

  The amusement glittered in his eyes as she brought out her list from the pocket of her jeans.

  ‘First I need to know how much money all this is costing. I only have limited savings.’

  A frown appeared between his brows as she continued.

  ‘Secondly I need to know the running costs of this place, and how much it will be to send Helen to this kindergarten, also where I can buy a cheap car.’

  By now Ryder was looking decidedly unsettled. He swept a hand through the fall of hair across his brow.

  ‘This block of four apartments belongs to me. I lease out two and you and Helen are guests in this one. I shan’t be looking for rent. As to your air fares, I brought you over on free air miles. A second-hand car won’t be too much for your meagre savings and petrol is cheap here. I was going to offer to pay for Helen’s schooling as it was my idea that you came here in the first place. You should have a generous salary from the school but if you find that you can’t manage then I’ll make you an allowance.’

  Jenny was shaking her head.

  ‘We don’t want your money.’

  ‘You didn’t mind taking my father’s money, though, did you?’ he shot back.

  Jenny felt the blood leave her face.

  ‘That was different.’

  ‘What’s different about it. I’m still your husband.’

  Jenny’s eyes flew to his.

  ‘That’s over and done with,’ she whispered.

  ‘Really?’

  The scowl had left his face and his brows rose in question above hard grey eyes. Convinced he would hear the crazy rhythm of her heartbeat she rose to her feet and crossed the room.

  ‘We are very grateful for this place but as soon as I get my driving licence and start work we’ll be looking for somewhere else.’

  ‘What? You haven’t given much thought to Helen’s feelings on the matter, yet again, have you?’

  He left the doorway and came to stand behind her. She turned to face him her eyes blazing with all the turmoil of her emotions.

  ‘How dare you talk to me like this! I love my daughter and until you came on to the scene we have always had a very good relationship.’

  She tried desperately to control the sob in her voice.

  ‘Now she seems to have swopped alliances, is that what you mean? And you resent it.’

  ‘No.’

  She was shaking her head angrily back and forth, her eyes on the tips of his highly-polished shoes. Then without knowing how or why she was in his arms, held close to his body her head tucked under his chin, one hand gently stroking her hair.

  ‘Bow to the wind,’ he whispered. ‘Don’t be so stubborn, Jenny.’

  CHAPTER SIX

  The following Tuesday, Ryder took Jenny down to the kindergarten for her interview with Elaine Doherty. The headmistress was small, dark and not much older than Jenny herself. The woman’s overall attitude, however, was friendly and Jenny left well satisfied that she could cope with anything that might come her way. The salary was generous, and Helen was to be allowed to stay on until Jenny was finished work after which they would travel home together.

  Jenny had agreed to stay on at the apartment rent free and accept Ryder’s offer to go fifty-fifty with Helen’s nursery fees. Her driving test had been a great success and now she was on her way with Ryder’s help to buy a second-hand car. The lot they chose was packed with every conceivable type of car. Jenny was staggered by the choice.

  ‘How do we begin?’ she asked Ryder.

  ‘A simple matter of elimination.’

  A greasy head appeared from beneath a truck not two yards from where they stood.

  ‘You folks looking to buy?’

  After some time and a few minor disagreements, a small brown saloon was hers. Jenny was glowing with pride at her new acquisition when she drove home and stepped out, coming face to face with Margaret Mitchells’ white convertible. She led Ryder into the apartment but there was no sign of Margaret.

  ‘Perhaps she’s upstairs,’ Jenny said.

  ‘Why should you think that?’

  ‘Well, she let herself into my apartment before we arrived so presumably she has your key also.’

  Ryder scowled as he replied, ‘The estate agent has a set of spare keys for all the apartments. Margaret occasionally checks them out when I’m away.’

  Jenny cast a quick look around.

  ‘I wonder where she is then.’

  ‘She probably came round, found we were out and has gone to visit a friend nearby. I believe Veronica Snider in the far corner is a particular friend of hers.’

  ‘Can I get you something to drink? Helen’s just discovered the ice-maker and we have enough to put icebergs in the swimming pool.’

  ‘No thank you, I have work to be getting on with upstairs. Where is Helen, by the way?’

  ‘Pam Lenners took her down to the pool with her own children.’

  ‘I see. I’m glad you’re making friends.’

  She wouldn’t have gone as far as that but before she could say so he had gone.

  When Helen wasn’t back an hour later, Jenny decided to wander down to the pool, and bring her back herself. But when she reached the poolside there was no-one there.

  They’ll be back at the Lenners’ house, she told herself but Pam’s face, when Jenny said she’d come for Helen, was a picture of horror.

  ‘But I don’t understand. Margaret Mitchell took her home for tea. She said she would give you a call as soon as you got back.’

  Black rage filled Jenny’s heart as she flew back across the green towards her apartment with only the briefest explanation to her neighbour. The phone was ringing as she entered. Jenny grabbed the phone from the wall and, forcing back the quiver in her voice snapped, ‘Where’s my daughter?’

  ‘I haven’t the faintest idea,’ a bemused voice came back. ‘Why, should I have? Isn’t she back yet?’

  Jenny swayed back on her heels.

  ‘Ryder. That woman’s taken her off without my permission. I thought that it was her I was talking to.’

  There was a deep sigh at the other end.

  ‘I suppose the woman in question is Margaret.’

  ‘l’ll have to go over there. She has no business . . . ’

  ‘All right. Look, give her a call first. You never know, she may well be on her way here and you’d look a bit silly passing each other on the road.’

  As she replaced the phone it rang. Picking it up she recognised Margaret’s voice immediately. Jenny charged straight in over the top of what Margaret was trying to say.

  ‘How dare you take my daughter away without my knowledge!’

  ‘She’s been playing on Anna’s new swing. When I saw her sitting there all on her own I felt so sorry for her.’

  ‘She wasn’t on her own. She was with the Lenners’ children.’

  ‘Well, she might have been with them, my dear, but Pammy and her male companion were doing their normal gossip thing and dear Helen was quite out of the way of the other children. I did call you but apparently you and Ryder had gone off somewhere so I left a message with Pammy and brought her home with Anna. Have you been back long? Is Ryder with you? My car was playing up again so I left it in your drive and borrowed a friend’s. Ask Ryder to be a pet and see if he can get it going, will you? Otherwise he’s going to have to give me a lift back home.’

  ‘We’ve been home an hour and a half and Ryder is upstairs working. But I’ll give him your message.’

  ‘Great, we’ll be over in a tick.’

  And she rang off. Jenny continued to simmer until Ryder came downstairs.

  ‘She’s bringing Helen home,’ and she gave him Margaret’s message.

  ‘Wants me to fix her car, does she?’

  His voice was so sharp edged she glanced up at him and caught the tic along his jaw. He’s angry, she thought, as he disappeared outside and she heard him raise the garage door. But she was astounde
d twenty minutes later when he turned on Margaret with a sharp retort when she appeared with Helen and parked a blue car in Veronica’s driveway and crossed the green to stand beside him.

  Jenny whisked Helen off for bath and bed. On her return to the living area she overheard Ryder’s angry voice as he told Margaret in no uncertain terms what he would do if she ever did anything like it again. Feeling rather elated by Ryder’s support of her, Jenny reasoned that she had to be generous and forgive Margaret her high-handedness. But before she could do so she heard the car door slam and seconds later the roar of the convertible. Ryder and Jenny were left staring at one another across the room.

  ‘It really wasn’t necessary to be quite so hard on her. I suppose I did panic rather,’ Jenny said.

  ‘That has nothing to do with the matter. She knows the dangers perfectly well and should have been more thoughtful. Anna disappeared for two days when she was three years old. They were nearly out of their minds with worry. It turned out to be some young woman whose own child had died the day before. She hadn’t made any attempt to cover her tracks and the police soon found her. It should have served to make Margaret think before doing such a silly thing. I can’t imagine what she was thinking about.’

  ‘Will you stay for a drink, something to eat perhaps?’

  ‘I have a better idea. I have some brandy upstairs. After a fright like that I’d say you could do with a pick-me-up. I’ll be back shortly.’

  Jenny had placed two plates of ham, scrambled egg and toast on the glass-topped table by the time he returned. There were two small side salads and two glasses of white wine. From the corner of her eye she saw Ryder hesitate in the doorway, the bottle of brandy in his hand.

  ‘I rustled up a bit of supper,’ she said.

  ‘Thank you. I don’t keep much food in the apartment myself and going out for a meal when I’m busy with work at home is too much bother.’