Kellion

by Marian Tee

  I took out my board and started to scribble. FEWER PEOPLE ARE AWAKE IN THE MORNING.

  That meant fewer chances of being forced to talk about my works. My drawings should speak for itself, and if that sounded like another excuse for me not to speak, well – that was true, too.

  KC was nodding in understanding. “I was like that, too, at the start, but I eventually got used to it.” She gnawed on her lip. “Will, uhh, Kellion come?”

  I shook my head.

  She was visibly surprised. “Why not?”

  I shaped my hands into an airplane and let it fly.

  “Oh. Greece, I’m guessing?”

  I nodded.

  “That’s too bad.” She squeezed my hand, grinning. “Don’t worry, I’m here to cheer you up so you won’t miss—”

  I moved to strangle her, but KC laughingly evaded me and quickly headed for the door. Outside the dressing room, virtually all of the students who had signed up for the morning shift were already there. The exhibit venue was a huge open space, with glossy white walls, tall ceilings, and black-and-white checkered tiles. All our works were framed and mounted on the walls while at the center of the room there were cocktail tables covered in black silk tablecloths and boasting of flower centerpieces made with recycled glass and wires.

  At eight in the morning, the exhibit was officially open. As one of the exhibitors, I had to stay near where my works were, ready to answer whatever questions visitors may have.

  “Are you ready, guys?” Professor Edison asked, and it was obvious he was having a hard time containing his own excitement. “Don’t be nervous, all right? And if we don’t have that many people checking your works out, that’s okay, it doesn’t mean there’s no value in what you’ve done. It only means we need to work harder at spreading the word.”

  I fidgeted in my heels, unsure if I had become more depressed or inspired after his speech.

  Professor Edison was taking deep breaths. “Here goes…” He flung the doors open.

  And nearly got swept away by the stampede.

  So many people! In the blink of an eye, the entire venue was jam-packed with visitors. But, I realized in surprise, they weren’t any ordinary visitors. Almost all of them wore media IDs, and my eyes widened as I caught sight of the logos printed on the IDs. They all belonged to the most popular arts and craft magazines, TV shows, and websites.

  How?

  But there was no time to wonder about it, not when some of the visitors started coming my way and I suddenly became deluged with questions.

  How long have you been doing this? Tell me about your work. What’s your inspiration behind them?

  Question after question after question, and I couldn’t write fast enough on my board to catch up with them, couldn’t remember the last time my fingers hurt this bad.

  But I wasn’t complaining.

  The hours passed, and there seemed to be no end to the visitors coming our way.

  Another student came to relieve me at lunchtime and I bowed to her gratefully. As much as talking about my work was enjoyable, it had also been tiring and I could definitely use a breather.

  When I got to the dressing room, a large box was on the table reserved for me. I took the card, my heart beating fast, knowing that this could only be from one person.

  You won’t know how sorry I am that I’m not there with you.

  P.S. I had the guy in charge of Afxisi’s website mention that I might be hiring one of the artists in your exhibit for a collab project with the club. It may get the press interested.

  I almost laughed out loud, but the mere fact that I wanted to also made me want to cry, made me want to hold on to that piece of my heart being chipped away by Kellion’s words.

  Unable to help it, I read the words again, his offhand reference to the media making me shake my head in incredulity.

  Interested? Was he for real? The whole world wasn’t just interested in what he was doing. They were obsessed with him, especially since the Afxisi’s President, Helios Andreadis, was now married. As the club’s VP, Kellion Argyros was automatically the next most eligible bachelor – Kellion, the same man who had so easily told the world he was dating me.

  Slowly, I reached for the box, telling myself I wouldn’t be disappointed if they were the usual chocolates or flowers. Or jewelry. After all, Kellion didn’t have much time to shop for this—

  Oh.

  Inside the box was something that looked like a huge, gooey wad of bubblegum that had suddenly started to bleed. Another card was inside the box, and taking it out, I couldn’t help laughing as I read Kellion’s message.

  This is called the ‘bleeding tooth fungus’, also known as ‘the devil’s tooth’.

  They’re flowers, by the way – the only kind that’s perfect for my terataki.

  Yours, Kellion

  By the time I was done reading, my chest was so tight I was tempted to unzip my dress just to see if it could help me breathe more easily. With each word, a piece of my heart chipped away. Chip, chip, chip until it felt like all of my heart was his.

  This gift was perfect, and that was what made it so terrifying. I pressed my hand over my heart. Pressed it really hard, hoping it would make my heartbeat slow down.

  But it didn’t, and that was bad. Extremely bad.

  Shit.

  I pressed harder. Slow down, please, slow down. But it didn’t.

  Shit.

  I think I’m in love with him.

  It was hard to see after that, hard to make sure that I was spelling everything correctly as I typed the words. But I continued typing my message, knowing that Kellion was smart enough to get what I wanted to say.

  Me: Thank you for the flowers. They were bloody perfect. Thank you for the media coverage. More than anything, I’m happy at how it would help the other artists. Thank you for everything.

  My fingers froze, and my tears fell faster.

  I thought about the way I loved Ashton and the way losing him had torn me apart. I didn’t want that to happen again. I didn’t think I would survive it the second time around.

  My fingers started to move.

  Me: But I don’t think I can see you again after this.

  Swallowing, I pressed Send.

  A second later, Kellion was calling me. I dropped the call. He called again, and I dropped it right away. It went on and on until I realized he had called me over twenty times.

  Me: I still want to see you smile. I will always see you. But I’ve become selfish. You made me selfish. You make me want more than your smile, and I hate myself for it.

  Kellion: Answer the phone. PLEASE.

  I cried harder at the words. So damn simple, but God, how those words hurt. I didn’t want him to beg. He knew that, right? Never. Never. Never.

  Me: I think I’m in love with you, and I don’t want to be in love with you. So please, please just stay away because I know you don’t love me back.

  I waited.

  But this time, my phone didn’t ring.

  I switched my phone off. It was easier to pretend he couldn’t call, less painful than the reality of Kellion no longer wanting to call.

  ****

  It was close to midnight when the after-party for the successful exhibit ended, with most of the students drunk and unable to walk a straight line. Since I was one of the few sober persons left, I felt obliged to help Professor Edison send everyone off in cabs rather than letting them get behind the wheel.

  Even KC was drunk, which was a surprise to me. She had never struck me as the type to lose her head over liquor. Thankfully, Lace was there to bring her home.

  I wrote on my board. YOU’RE SURE YOU CAN HANDLE HER ON YOUR OWN?

  Lace nodded. “Unfortunately, this isn’t the first time she’s drunk too much.”

  Together, we helped KC get inside the cab. As KC slumped in the backseat, she whispered something.

  Yuki.

  I blinked. I had no idea what it meant, but the pain in her voice was unmistakable and I
couldn’t help looking at my friend, wishing there was something I could do to ease her hurt.

  As I straightened to let Lace get inside next, I saw her pretty face marred by a scowl. “That’s her ex’s name.” She added darkly, “They broke up in high school and there’s never been closure.”

  Ah. I got it, but I didn’t get it at the same time. How could any sane guy hurt someone like KC? The thought had my blood turning cold. KC was a nice girl, the nicest person I’ve ever met, the proverbial good girl. But some stupid guy had still been enough of an asshole to break her heart. If that could happen to KC, then wasn’t it more likely something worse would happen if I was the one to fall?

  “Aria?”

  I started, not realizing Lace had been talking to me.

  “You’re sure you don’t want to ride with us?”

  I nodded. The university was just ten minutes away. Right now, I would rather walk, needed to do something that would clear my head.

  We exchanged waves and I stayed there, waiting for the cab to turn round the corner before taking the first step home. The night was cold and breezy, and I felt even more thankful I had been able to borrow a jacket from one of the guys at the exhibit.

  Pulling the jacket closer around me, I walked slowly, my feet moving at a slower pace than the jumbled thoughts racing in my head. There was a dull ache inside me that hadn’t really disappeared since I sent that message to Kellion, and I was scared it was the kind of wound that would never ever heal.

  Minutes had passed when I realized someone was following me. I tried to quicken my steps without being obvious about it.

  “Miss.” A hand touched my shoulder.

  I didn’t bother looking behind me. I just broke into a run.

  The man behind me laughed, and then he was running after me. “Are you going to blow me if I catch you?”

  The words had me stumbling.

  Amelie knelt in front of me, her eyes shining with excitement. It was the opposite of what I felt, a stomach-churning fear that had my knees shaking under my dress. The fact that my outfit was almost completely transparent, made of lace and gossamer, definitely didn’t help.

  Every time I caught my reflection on the mirror, I couldn’t help but cringe. My hair, my makeup, my dress - it had transformed me, turning a 12-year-old into someone who looked old enough to drink. To drive. To win singing competitions meant for individuals of legal age.

  “Relax, my love,” my mother was saying. “You have this. You’re the most beautiful girl here, prettier than all the ones who sang before you.”

  Dan came forward, standing beside Amelie as he ruffled my hair. “If you really want this, though, you just have to say one thing. Everyone’s gotta have a gimmick to win in these gigs, ya know?”

  “What should I say?”

  “Just look at the judges and tell them you’ll blow them one.” As he blew me a kiss and fluttered his lashes, I couldn’t help giggling while beside Dan, Amelie gasped and laughed. It was rare to see him act funny like that, and I liked it. He was more like my dad than a stranger when he was funny.

  “You naughty man.” Amelie landed a playful slap on his arm.

  Dan kissed her on the mouth, making her laugh even more. Turning to me, he said, “Remember. That’s exactly what you should say. You’re gonna blow them one.”

  And I had.

  I had said those words night after night, too innocent to know what they meant until a judge had thought the words were true and tried to sneak into my hotel room, demanding payment.

  The memory crushed me, and before I knew it, I was on the ground, screaming and thrashing as a man fell on top of me, telling me he’d give me the best media coverage if I would blow him one—

  A second later, uniformed men appeared from nowhere, hauling him off my body.

  Someone offered me a hand. “Ma’am?” The voice was gentle, soft, unthreatening.

  I remained on the ground, dazed. The man looked familiar, and I stared at him until recognition dawned and I realized he had been one of the men supposedly tailing Kellion.

  “Ma’am. Please let me help you up. I’m one of Mr. Argyros’ men.”

  Shakily, I placed my hand in his. Behind him, I could still hear my attacker howling. He was a middle-aged man, with balding hair and wearing a crumpled suit.

  As he struggled to be free from the men holding him back, he snarled, “Who do you think you are, bitch?”

  The way his bloodshot eyes raked over me made my skin crawl, made me remember the times my own parents had forced me to sing in front of dozens of men like him.

  “You’re a nobody, a nobody, and you think you can do this to me? What’s wrong? Just because you’re spreading your legs for Kellion Argyros now, you can’t blow me one like you promised your fans all those years?”

  I covered my ears even though I knew it was pointless.

  “You were a slut since you were a kid, and you’ll always be a slut—”

  “Ma’am, please let us take you home.” Kellion’s bodyguard drew me away, leading me to a black BMW parked a few feet away from us.

  Had they been trailing me on foot as well as by car? They must be really good at their jobs if they could do all that without me knowing a thing. Thinking about Kellion’s security team helped me ignore the screams haunting me from behind, and I did my best to focus on them as the man opened the door for me.

  Alone in the backseat, I could only watch through the window as we drove away, a dull sense of relief washing over me as the sight of the red-faced reporter still shouting invectives faded little by little.

  “Ma’am?”

  I blinked, realizing that the bodyguard had been trying to get my attention for some time now. When I glanced at him, it seemed like he already knew I didn’t communicate the way normal people like him did, didn’t wait for me to speak as he held out his iPhone to me. “Mr. Argyros would like to speak to you, ma’am.”

  “You were so great, baby.” Amelie hugged me tightly as I left the stage and met her at the wings.

  “Damn right,” Dan said. “Most awesome singer there. Because of you, Mommy and Daddy won’t have to be forced to work for shitheads.” He tipped my chin up. “And didn’t I tell you that phrase was gonna win you the judges’ hearts?”

  My dad continued to speak, but I barely heard him over the pounding of my heart. The way the judges had looked at me was weird. It made me feel weird. I was just glad it was all over.

  “So remember those words and you’re gonna say them every time you finish a song, all right?” At my nod, he ruffled my hair again. “That’s my girl. You just do what Daddy says and it will always be good.”

  The memories almost had me gagging. Even now, a part of me was still unable to comprehend how my own father could have made me say those words. I was a kid – his twelve year old kid.

  How could he bear hearing me say it? How could Amelie not do anything to stop him? How? Dammit, how?

  “Ma’am?” The bodyguard still had his hand out.

  On the other end of the line, Kellion was waiting for me. Because of Kellion, something – something really bad – hadn’t happened. Because of Kellion, I had started living again. But it was also because of Kellion I had forgotten the only important thing my parents had taught me.

  With Ashton gone, no one left in this world could be trusted.

  Slowly, I shook my head. “P-please…say…thank…you…for…me.” It hurt so much more to speak now, my wildly careening emotions making my throat feel rawer and exposed. “But…please…tell…him…I…don’t…want…to….talk…to…him…again.”

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Dear Ashton,

  If anyone ever hurts you, you gotta tell me, okay?

  I’ll kick their ass for you.

  Love, Your Big Sis

  P.S. I know you’d do the same for me, but don’t worry about me. I’m very strong. Also, you’re too cute to scare anyone.

  KELLION

  Kellion was seated on a fur-c
overed nook next to the windows, the city of Athens glowing like a jewel underneath him. A jewel of another kind was on his lap, curled up against his chest, a girl who was just as beautiful and precious as any gem.

  He didn’t say a word as Jacqueline cried in his arms, simply stroking her hair. The sound of her tears hurt like it always did. She didn’t have to be in this much pain, would never have experienced this much hurt if only she had chosen to see him.

  “I’m so scared, Kel.” Her words were a shaky whisper, her voice so fragile it made Kellion instinctively tighten his arms around her.

  He murmured comforting words in Greek, willing her to relax. “Don’t be. I’m here for you. I won’t let him do anything to hurt you.”

  A long time passed before she spoke again, her voice slurred. “I wish…I wish I had fallen for you instead.”

  Only when Kellion was sure she was sleeping did he answer. “I wish the same thing, too, Jack.” Lifting her into his arms to carry her back to her bed, he placed a kiss on her forehead.

  Looking down at her, his voice was toneless as he said, “Always did.” After tucking her in, Kellion closed the lights before leaving the room.

  Dinah, Jack’s nanny since childhood, was outside, an anxious look on her face as she asked, “Has she settled down?”

  He nodded. “For now.”

  The older woman sighed in relief. “Thank goodness. The past week has truly been hard for her.” With her hair neatly tied back and dressed in a stark white uniform, Dinah still looked almost exactly like she did the first time he had met her decades ago, if not for a few white strands of hair.

  When Dinah caught him looking at her, she smiled. “In our mutual worries, we have both neglected proper niceties, have we not, Master Kellion?” She spoke in a very stiff tone, her upper lip curling. It had been her way of disciplining Kellion and Jack when they had been kids and unwilling to attend English lessons with her during the weekends.