by Honor James
“Because of how you lock deep inside of me?” And she shivered with the thought of how their lovemaking ended, she loved it and god help her she was hotter and hotter for it. “I want to mark you where everyone will see it and I want the same from you. I am proud to wear the mark of your mating with me, Laszlo, I would like that you are proud of that mark, too.”
Nodding with a smile at her question he kissed her chin lightly. “You can mark me for the world to see, love, and I will proudly wear your mark. After your change and once you’ve healed up, probably about two, maybe three, days, we’ll mark each other.”
“That sounds good, Laszlo.” She smiled up at him and nodded. “Tell me what to expect? I was there when Harker changed but I was in the other room so I have no idea what happened there.” She bit her lip. “All I heard were screams from Harker, and her begging for Miklos.”
Stroking her hair in a soothing manner, Laz stared up at her. “It’s hard on the human counterpart to go through the change without their mate. The need to be touched, reassured is strong since it’s like a beast trying to take over the body. With us it will be different because I will be there. I won’t lie and say that there is no pain because there is, love. Your body is changing, adjusting and, more or less, mutating into another species. You’ll burn with fever, your body will contort as it starts making the changes, parts of you will change and then return until the end when you will be wolf. That is one of the most dangerous times because of the stress on the mind. Some don’t come out of the change very coherent and there have been many reports of mates being attacked at that point and some killed.” He saw the look in her eyes and smiled. “Don’t worry, love, I’m not going to let you harm me, in either form I’m stronger than you are and I can hold you down until you”—he coughed and looked away with a grin—“come to your senses.”
She smiled and nodded. “I hope I won’t attack you, Laszlo, and if I do I apologize now.” She said with a smile and then nodded. “I want to do this, Laszlo, I need to do this. I want forever with you and that has to start with you making me.” She moved back to him and hugged him closer, her cheek on his chest. “I want to do this, Laszlo, but I have never asked you if this is what you want to do. Do you want to do this, Laszlo? Do you want to change me over or do you want me to remain as I am?”
“Honey, beyond me wanting you to do whatever you want and for you to be happy, I want you with me for all time, however much we have,” he told her clearly. “I’ve been wanting to change you since I first caught your scent, but then my brothers claim it’s my dominant nature or some such crap.”
She snorted and shook her head. “They really don’t know me very well do they? If they think that you can bully me into anything, they really don’t know me.” She grinned and nodded. “Then I think that you and I need to do this, Laszlo, we should start our lives together with this, so what do we need to do in order to get the house ready?”
“We’ll do it out here in the living room, the biggest space and we can be next to the fire. We’ll need to boil up some towels and then let them cool naturally so that we have them to clean you up. A pot of warm water for the same reason, a comfortable pallet and you’ll have to be naked, love. You will shift at the end and I don’t want you having to fight through clothing, it might amp up your panic level if you had to without having done the full shift before.”
She smiled nervously. “Are you sure that’s just not you trying to get me all nice and naked?” She bit her lip but nodded. “All right, Laz, let’s go ahead and get our living room ready so that we can do this thing.” She frowned and then said, “Harker slept for like three days after, is that pretty normal or was that because she was still recovering from the wound on her back?”
Helping her to his feet, he got up and shook his head. “No, love, it’s not normal, and yes, it was because of her injury. You’ll sleep anywhere from twelve to thirty-six hours off and on. That’s more the norm,” he said as he guided her to the hall closet and opened it, pulling out a couple comforters and some sheets as well as a pillow. “It all depends on your physical individuality as a human as to just how long it takes your body to recover from the change.”
“Well I’m in perfect health. I’m fit physically, so hopefully I won’t be on the long end of the recovery slide scale.” She smiled as she added, “I am not a good sick person. I grumble and complain when I’m ill. I hate to be sick and normally you never know when I am because I push through it and do whatever I have to instead of being home where I should be.”
“Uh-huh,” he said with a hint of a grin. “Should I also mention that you’re going to lose your cookies, too?” he asked with a chuckle when her head snapped around. Moving back to the living room he shrugged. “It shouldn’t be too bad, you haven’t eaten recently have you?” he asked hiding his evil grin as he bent to start laying out the pallet before moving to lay the fire.
“No, I haven’t eaten since yesterday.” She frowned and tapped her foot. “Harker didn’t get sick, Laszlo, you’re pulling my leg, right?” She wasn’t about to not have him change her, but she seriously hated being sick. Hated it.
Snorting, he stood up and headed for the kitchen to start the water. “She threw up all over Janos in the shower,” he told her in a calm manner. “She threw up several times in the living room if I recall correctly, she didn’t throw up on Mik though, for which Janos is seriously annoyed about. All humans that take the change get sick, you have to push out all impurities before the gene can do what it needs to and change you to Wolf. You’ll sweat blood, too, since some impurities are on the cellular level.”
“Oh lord.” She wiped the sweat from her brow and nodded. “All right, I still want to do this,” she said with a grin and then, “You aren’t scaring me away, Laszlo, I still want to do this.” She took a seat on the blankets before the fire and sat there naked, waiting for him. “I love you, Laszlo, nothing is changing my mind.”
“Uh-huh,” he said as he continued to make the preparations. Boiling the towels he pulled them out to let them sit in the sink to drain and cool. Once the second pot was warm enough he moved it to the hearth to stay warm by the fire. Whistling softly he went back to the kitchen and, dumping out the first pot, moved the towels after a quick squeeze into them and went back.
One last trip he collected a bunch of dry towels and rejoined her. Sitting at her side he looked to her. He’d been silent for the last twenty minutes to give her time to think about it all on her own. “You ready?” he asked her softly. At her nod he smiled. “Where do you want me to bite you and remember, this is going to hurt, love, a lot.”
“I want you facing me, I don’t want it to be where you are at my back, Laszlo, I want to be able to see your eyes so that I know that this is for us, for our life together, Laszlo.” She touched his cheek and smiled. “I love you, as for where”—she shrugged and opened her body to him—“anywhere, my neck or my breast, I leave that for you to decide, honey.”
Shifting, he eased her back, his hand on her neck gentling the fall to the blankets. Shaking his head slightly he stared at her. “I need you to pick, love, it will vanish afterwards, but it will be forever in your mind. I want you to choose, love, please,” he asked softly.
She took his hand and rubbed it over her front, biting her lip as she did so and smiling. “Here,” she whispered with their hands combined over her breast. “No matter what, Laszlo, it will always be in my mind how much you love me.” Her other hand moved up and into his hair, tugging him closer. “I love you, Laszlo, kiss me first?”
Bending over her, one hand braced by her head and the other massaging her soft flesh, he kissed her slowly and gently. Tasting her so sweetly on his tongue he let out a soft sigh of pleasure. Shifting just a little, he nibbled on her lips before slowly dragging his lips away and over her cheek, down her throat and to her breast. Teasing her flesh for a time he made sure she was relaxed and in a happy place before he let his teeth shift. They became the more defined shapes of t
he Wolf and, with a prayer that she survived and didn’t hate him, bit her deep. His arms caught her to him as she automatically fought that first sting.
Biting back the scream and sob, she tried to force her body not to struggle, but she struggled as it were anyway. She had tears falling as she sobbed finally, “Oh god.” She whimpered in pain. She felt it then, she felt the burn in her blood and screamed, unable to stop it from coming out. Desi began to writhe in pain. “Enough, Laszlo.” Every time she moved his teeth tore deeper into her flesh that was already burning with the change that was beginning inside of her.
Growling at her he just held her tighter, and somehow she knew that, no matter how much they wished this was done, it wasn’t yet, not until… Then it was there, a kick back of her blood that mixed with his saliva before spilling into the wound. Pulling his teeth free, he grabbed a wet towel and quickly made a compress, his hand holding it down firmly.
“I’m sorry, love,” he whispered softly, pressing his cheek to hers. “I had to wait, I’m so sorry, baby.” She could hear it in his voice, how he hated that he’d caused her such pain.
She could only nod, everything else seemed to hurt her so badly that she couldn’t breathe. Tears were flowing but she reached her hand up and cupped his cheek. “Laszlo.” Her voice was strained, in pain, but she reached for him. “Please, honey, don’t.” It was clear that she hated that he was hurting because of something she wanted, something she needed.
“Shh,” he whispered, moving to lie at her side as he lifted the towel. He seemed to check that the wound was beginning to seal up, then he moved the bucket he’d brought out a little closer. “It’s starting, Des, I need you to focus on one thought, getting through this for us both. I need you to make it through this, love. I need you,” he breathed against her cheek. She felt him lift her hand and nibble on her fingers as he presumably watched the wound seal completely in slow motion. The look on his face told her he knew that the real pain was about to begin.
She nodded and then an unholy howl escaped her lips. She screamed and writhed trying to get away from him, from the pain that she felt. She made it to the bucket only because he pulled it to her and held it and her hair as she threw up.
Laszlo held her as close as he could while still giving her room to move. It was as if he felt every pain she did, every ache and every shift of her body as she burned with heat of the change.
Pain burnt her from the inside out, she was hurting more than she had ever imagined could hurt and then it started all over again. She was crying and screaming as pain ripped through her.
“I know, baby,” he whispered, and she wondered if he wished he’d never given her the option of the change. He could have just lived his life with her, taking whatever they could have had and gone onto the next when she did. As she calmed slightly he bathed her body with the cool towels murmuring softly to her and giving her all the love he seemed to hold for her.
She was in one of the down moments of the change, she simply lay there in his arms, panting and clinging to him weakly. “I love you, Laszlo,” she whispered with eyes closed. She didn’t want to see the blood on the towels that came from her skin, she could feel it, and smell it. She could smell all the toxins leaving her body and just before another clench of pain she opened eyes and smiled at Laszlo. “We are going to get through this and have our happily ever after, Laz.” She screamed again as the pain ripped her to shreds.
Laszlo waited until the shrieking died to a pained moan before he laid down with her again, his hands stroking over her belly gently. “Yes we will, love,” he told her as she slumped, her breathing deep and harsh. “We will also take a little vacation and get away, just the two of us for a week wherever you want to go. I think you deserve a vacation where you are waited on hand and foot like the Goddess I see you as for going through this, baby,” he whispered against her ear.
It went on for what seemed like hours, her body removing all of the waste through being ill, releasing her bowels or the blood from her pores. Desmonda had no control over her body as the pain of the change sizzled each and every nerve ending she had and created new ones. Her whole body was reshaping, taking on new muscle mass and more. Finally she felt it, she felt the change as it was about to begin and clenched onto Laszlo tightly, fear radiating from her. “Laszlo” was a whispered sound before she felt the fur beginning to sprout over her skin. She didn’t fight the shift like Harker had, she let it take her.
Rolling as she changed Laszlo didn’t go far, but he let her have some room. She supposed not all new turns reacted the same way and he wanted some room if he needed it. “Just let it happen, baby,” he encouraged, and she watched his growing smile of appreciation.
The fur began to grow over her body, the color of honey. It covered even as her bones in her body began to reshape and reform. She felt her face shifting and howled in agony as the first shift took her.
She saw him shiver at the sound of that first howl and he winced as if in answered pain. “That’s it, love, it’s almost over.” She hoped. As she finally finished the transformation, his eyes ran over her in a quick look, and he seemed to assure himself and her that all was well. “You are perfect, Des,” he said softly holding his hand palm up to her, and he waited for her to take the first step. She was his mate, but with the scrambling of that first change, maybe he knew she might not really remember more than on a basic level who he was.
She quivered on the four legs, they didn’t seem to want to support her as she tried to move. Falling to her stomach she whined, then growled, refusing to give up. She was strong willed as a woman, and even stronger willed as a wolf.
Once more she got to her paws and slowly, one paw at a time, moved toward him. When she reached his hand she sniffed him, licked his open palm, and butted her head into his hand, demanding he show her affection for what she had just went through.
Smiling, he shifted closer to her and wrapped his arms around her, held on tight. “I’ve got you, love,” he whispered gently, petting her pelt. “You are beautiful, baby,” he breathed into her ear as he rubbed his cheek to the top of her furry head.
She whined and licked his arm and hand, ducking her head and allowing him to caress and rub her. Soon however she was ready to get out of the form of wolf, she wanted to be held by him and even as her large wolfen eyes closed, she whimpered and whined, unable to voice what she needed, and prayed he would know her thoughts.
Cupping her cheeks, Laz moved to sit in front of her and stroked her fur. “Deep inside of you is your human form, Des. You need to find that piece of you that is human, hold it tight, and focus on it. It’s just like turning into the wolf, but in reverse. You are human in nature and while the Wolf is strong, so are you. Find who you are, hold it close, envelope yourself in it, and let yourself change back, love. Don’t worry about anything else, just on turning back to your human form.”
The large wolfen head nodded even as she closed the eyes of the wolf, focusing on what he had said she reached for that part of her that was human, pulling it from the shadows forcefully she slowly, painfully shifted back. Laying exhausted on his lap with eyes closed, she placed a weak hand on his knee. “I love you, Laszlo.” She was glad it was over, beyond tired and did the only thing she could have, went to sleep. She was covered in blood, vomit, and bodily waste, but she didn’t care, she was too tired to care.
Smiling, Laszlo laid her down and began to clean her up. Once she was clean head to toe he took her to their bed and tucked her in. She watched him go back to the other room, most likely to clean everything up. Once he was done she heard him shower, then he climbed into bed with her. He seemed to think it wasn’t quite over yet, and he’d still probably to watch her for the next few hours so that he could ensure she really was through the change. But at least she could rest and regain some of her strength.
She began to whine a short while later, her body burning up and aching as she lay in the loose circle of his arms. She was so deep in sleep she hadn’t even let
him into the dreaming with her, but the nightmare, the pain, it was more than she could hold back. In his arms the body of the woman was replaced with the wolf and then the woman again, her mind fighting which form to take in sleep.
* * * *
“Desmonda!” Laszlo said sharply. “Wake up now!” he snapped. She’d pummel him for his tone later but he couldn’t have her doing this in her sleep. As her eyes opened he knew she wasn’t really awake and, taking a chance, he leaned over her and kissed her hard, his teeth scraping over her lower lip as he nibbled on her flesh, his hands moving over her skin knowing the sensations would be nearly tenfold of what they’d been when she’d been human.
Desi’s eyes popped open so quickly that she might have thought that she was dreaming. His kisses and hands, however, as they moved over her, made her shiver in delight. “Laszlo.” That fast she clearly went from sound asleep to hot, needy, and desperate. Hungry for her mate. “I need you.” Her voice was a low rumble of a growl.
Lifting his head he stared down at her, his hand moving to cup her face. “Are you awake?” he asked, not entirely sure but the way she seemed to focus told him a lot. “You were having a nightmare, love,” Laz told her, softly stroking his fingers over her soft skin.
“It didn’t feel like a nightmare.” She rubbed against him eagerly. “I’m wide awake, Laszlo, I’m awake and god I’m on fire.” She was hot, her eyes alive with flames as she moved under him. “I need you, Laszlo, I need you to fuck me or I’m going to explode.”
His breath hissed out at her words even as he shifted positions, her movements building the fire inside of himself. “Des.” He growled at her as her hands slid over him, trying to warn her to go slow, but she was having none of that. Unable to withstand the need he shifted and drove into her hard, patience long since having fled the building. His cock pressed its way through her sopping wet pussy easily and without resistance.
