“Oh, please don’t stop her now. Everyone in her family stops her from speaking about it. Let her speak. You need to hear the rest.” Blaze’s anger was palpable and for good reason.
“Tommy, I’m fine. I know this may be hard for you to believe, but this has been somewhat liberating for me.” My heart began to race. I needed to get it out…all of it. It was liberating, but not without heartbreak.
Tommy nodded. I wasn’t sure if he fully understood, but he was respectful throughout my entire story. I needed to end this once and for all, especially for my own sanity.
“We had gotten the call at 10 am. It was the 4th of July, ironically my brother’s birthday was on Independence Day. They wouldn’t say over the phone what had happened, just that we needed to get there. My parents were down here with Viv, and I was with Blaze in the city. Damien was in LA with his dad on business. When we got there, the doctors at the Center had explained that Jimmy somehow managed to get up to the balcony on the third floor which over-looked the fountains in the gardens at the Center. He was then able to lift his body up just enough to topple over it. My brother fell to his death.” The darkness, the image I created in my head of Jimmy going over the railing shook in my voice.
I looked at the coffee in my cup as the all too familiar lump of clay formed in my throat and those tears I remembered so well burned my eyes. The silence in the room drowned out the waves of the ocean that roared only steps away from us. Yet, a part of me was liberated when telling the story to Tommy. The other part endured the pain… my brother was gone. In a split second my life changed. I knew Jimmy had been unhappy, yet he seemed to have adjusted very well. He was the one person who never took life for granted. Because of that, I never thought his sadness would be the sum of all his fears and those fears would have forced my fearless Jimmy took to end his own life.
“Let’s shut this down. No more, I don’t need to hear any more. I understand.” Tommy whispered, but Blaze wouldn’t let it go. She wanted me to tell him all of it because she was right, the story wasn’t done yet. It needed its not so happy ending to make it complete.
“Tommy, let her finish it.” Blaze pushed.
“Maybe Tommy’s right. Why rehash it?” Daniel said, trying to reason with Blaze.
Blaze was about to speak, but I beat her to it.
“It’s okay. I’m almost done, and I’d like for Tommy to know the truth… all of it. You’ll understand why I did what I did yesterday. Why I came downstairs in my underwear and yelled about the rose vines. Why I did what I did at the party…once I’m finished, you’ll understand all of it.”
“Okay, it’s your story to tell. Go on,” Tommy said.
“After Jimmy died, I was beside myself with grief. I wouldn’t go to work. I barely ate. I just wasn’t me anymore. Part of me died with Jimmy. Damien tried his best to make things somewhat normal, but it finally took its toll on him. He was spending more time away from me and the shore and more time in New York. He traveled more. Our relationship began to unravel. Finally, I knew I had to do something, so I quit my job at the restaurant and moved down here to my parents’ house on the other end of LBI. I had been going back and forth from here to the city, but when my parents offered to sell me the land next door to my childhood home, I had decided to build a place of my own and open Summertime Sweets. I felt better and for a while, my relationship with Damien seemed to be improving. Then one weekend I had told Damien I’d be going into the city to stay with Blaze. He was away on business and said he’d be back from France on Monday. Blaze’s meeting fell through, so we agreed that we would come down here instead and relax before Damien returned. It was late when we drove back from the city on Saturday evening. I had noticed that Damien’s car was in the driveway and the first-floor lights were on. We went inside, but there was no one around, yet we heard something upstairs, so I assumed it was Damien. I went upstairs to surprise him, but the surprise was on me.”
“Go on, Jade,” Blaze coaxed.
I sighed and blurted it out. “I found Damien having sex with Courtney.”
“I assume you booted him out on his ass,” Tommy snapped, but not at me.
“No, I just stood there… and laughed,” I said it and just like back then, a small laugh escaped my lips.
“What?” Tommy said as if he couldn’t understand my reaction.
“It was a strange way to behave; I’ll give you that. Perhaps the norm would have been to scream and throw things, but it was my house. Why should I have wrecked my place for him? Blaze, on the other hand, lost it. She started to yell at them both. She even went so far as throwing their clothes over the deck onto the sand. It forced them to leave naked. As I think back on it now, that was the best part of the night. Well, that and the fact that Blaze and I dragged the mattress out of the house and burned it on that beach that very evening.” Blaze and I both grinned with sheer satisfaction.
“Yeah, that was one hell of a bonfire, sweetie,” Blaze added with a satisfied grin.
“After everything, I had been through that year or so before, Damien sleeping with Courtney seemed so…I don’t know, laughable. It really did. I lost my brother and now the girl who broke his heart was fucking my fiancé, in my bed of all places.”
“Wait, Courtney was Jimmy’s girlfriend?” Tommy stopped me.
I nodded. “Yeah. Obviously, she had been sleeping with Damien before my brother had died and before our relationship troubles began.”
“Did you speak to either one of them again?” Tommy asked.
“I saw Damien shortly after the incident. He came to pick up his stuff. He said they had started to sleep together after my brother died, but I never totally believed him. I haven’t seen Courtney since that evening and hopefully, I won’t ever have to see her again.”
“So let me get this straight. Even though Damien was a total shit to you, his dad still wants you both to start over again?”
“Yeah. He has always disliked Courtney. I’m not really sure why he has such a disdain for her, but he always has, even before Jimmy died. He had no use for her and he had even tried to keep Jimmy from becoming involved with her.”
“I know you don’t like her and for good reason, but I wonder why Reece doesn’t like her, so much as to tell Jade’s brother not to get involved with her?” Tommy questioned Blaze.
“Because Courtney is a know-it-all. She’s pushy, and she likes to one-up the people around her every chance she gets. And when she doesn’t get her way, she whines. Reece doesn’t tolerate women like her very well.” Blaze explained.
“So that’s why he was so determined to get Damien back with Jade. Some of the things you’ve said about Courtney are very superficial things for a man like Reece to bother with. Are you sure there isn't anything else going on?”
“Reece loves Jade and has always loved her. He would love for his son to wake up and realize what he’s missing. I believe Courtney is just a means to an end for Reece so he can get what he wants. He is not one to lose.” Blaze continued.
“It doesn’t matter what Damien is missing out on or that Reece doesn’t like to lose, Damien and I are done. We’ve been over for a long time. I’ll never go back to that. Frankly, that’s why I decided not to get into a serious relationship with anyone anymore.”
“Forever?” Tommy seemed stunned and weirdly disappointed.
“Umm…I don’t know about forever, but what I do know is life can’t always be about forever. It has to be about the here and the now, something I took for granted. I do know I wasted so much time on Damien, time that could have been spent enjoying life. That’s what I intend to do, have fun and enjoy what’s in front of me, not what’s possibly down the road.” Just then I looked down at my phone and realized it was almost 8 o’clock; I jumped up to rush out.
“Not so fast, baby. Don’t I even get a kiss goodbye? I mean I was your boyfriend last night and you did fall asleep in my arms, and I was a perfect gentleman. Don’t you think my acts of valor deserve a reward?” Tommy teas
ed as he grinned from ear to ear.
He was too sexy not to take him up on his offer, and I was all about having fun. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, my fingertips grazed the back of his neck, then I kissed his cheek, letting my lips linger there before I whispered in his ear.
“I can’t thank you enough for such a perfect evening. Maybe we can do it again sometime?” My voice was soft and breathy. I wondered if I turned him on like he unknowingly had done to me that night at the club.
When I pulled away his mouth hung open slightly. His stare was blank, and he was speechless.
Yeah, I did…Good.
Tommy
JADE RAN OFF abruptly, but not before she left me with the most sensual memory of her silky lips on my skin. Last night continued to confirm I wanted to get to know her better. She was outwardly beautiful. No one could deny that. Yet, my desire to spend more time with her came from a more intimate place—an inner beauty that peeked out through her words and mannerisms.
From what Jade had said about her brother, the way she sounded when she spoke of him, told me she and Jimmy had an amazing relationship, prior to the accident. She beamed when she mentioned his name. I truly believed she loved Jimmy more than anyone else in her life, but I had felt that Jade used her love for him as a security blanket of sorts. It was an invisible shield that protected her every day. If she kept things positive, then the hurt and the memory from the loss of her brother wouldn’t be able to swallow her up whole and quite possibly destroy her, as well.
Perhaps all of these assumptions about a girl I just met were allowing me to get way ahead of myself where Jade was concerned. The very little I observed, combined with what she explained to me, made me create these illusions, maybe delusions in my head. I needed to stop this and take a step back.
Jade wanted time to stand still, right in this moment…where she could create a safe haven of happiness that didn't include a man. Yet, I wanted time to move forward. Maybe not with the speed of light, but just fast enough to be with someone I could spend the rest of my life with, or at least to start spending the rest of my life with. I had wasted so much time already.
I had to hand it to Jade, though. She kept herself busy by putting all her efforts into her business. Not only was Summertime Sweets successful at its present location from what her Aunt Viv had explained to me, but it was getting a complete makeover in a much larger space just down the street from where her shoppe was now. I needed to put that same attention into this beach house and get my mind off my new neighbor. That would be easier said than done.
Jade had left only a few minutes ago and I wanted to already see her again. Even though last night and this morning, proved to be eye-opening about her past, it really only skimmed the surface. I knew there was more.
Maybe I could pay a neighborly visit to her shoppe later in the day. A bake shoppe would have a huge morning rush, so I believed it wouldn’t be a good idea to interrupt her so soon after she had just left my place. Plus, I didn’t want to appear too eager and scare her off.
With my mind preoccupied with thoughts of her dancing in my head, I almost forgot I had guests in the kitchen. I walked back to the table to find Blaze and Daniel huddled together in what appeared to be a conspiracy of sorts.
“Cozy…so from the looks of things I’d say you two are up to something.” It was a statement, but it was also a question that they needed to answer.
“We’re not up to anything. How can you say that? We were just reminiscing about old times. I haven’t seen Daniel in years,” Blaze answered first and too quickly I might add, which proved she and Daniel were up to no good.
“I can say that because the both of you have the look of guilt on your faces. Now, which one of you is going to tell me what this little meeting of the minds is all about?”
“I guess I’ll tell you,” Daniel chuckled and looked at Blaze who shrugged and offered no opinion at that point.
“Finally! A voice of reason. Let’s have it,” I said, as I threw both my hands up in the air in exhilaration for what I was about to hear.
“Don’t be angry, but I told Blaze about your plan for moving down here.”
“Why the hell did you do that?” I snapped. I was confused why Daniel would reveal my secret to Blaze of all people.
“Hear me out.” He firmly stated, gesturing his hand up to quell my current state of anger.
“Go on.”
“Listen, I’m your friend, and as such, I feel it’s my duty to stop you before you hit that proverbial brick wall.”
“For God sake, what are you talking about?” He wasn't making any sense. He knew better than anyone, except for myself, what my plans were when I decided to leave my past life behind, lie to my family and friends and move down here to start over. Now he thought that I had made a mistake? In the beginning, he was all for it. I wondered what had changed his mind.
“When you first told me about your plan to buy the beach house, I absolutely thought it was going to be the best thing for you, but now after seeing you with Jade, I’m not so sure it is.”
“Why? What’s changed?” I became worried.
“You have.” Two words…that was all he had for me?
“That’s it? I’ve changed? How have I changed? I’ve been down here for what…a week? And you think I’ve changed? I’m still me. I’m still fixing the house and hopefully in the next six months or so, I’ll have someone to share it with.”
“That’s just it, Tommy…when you started this whole thing and said you were going to buy the house, fix it your way, and find a wife, I was cautiously happy for you. But now that the woman you seem to set your sights on, and so soon, is Jade, I’ve gotta tell ya, bro, I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Don’t listen to him, Tommy. He’s overthinking it. I, for one, think it’s absolutely fantastic that you and Jade have found each other. It may be soon for you, but Jade has closed herself off for far too long. Plus, I know she believes she won’t give into Reece’s pleas, but I’m not sure about that.” Blaze was beyond excited, she was almost exuberant.
“I don’t know if you’d call it finding each other. It’s only been forty-eight hours since I met Jade, but I also don’t get why you’re so dead set against it, Daniel. Especially since you were my biggest fan of the idea in the beginning.” I addressed both of them, but only Daniel responded.
“I was your only fan in the beginning because you refused to tell anyone else about this. Now don’t get me wrong, I still think it’s a great idea to change what’s not working for you in your life, but I just wish Jade wasn’t part of the equation. She’s a beautiful person and under normal circumstances, I think that the two of you would be the perfect couple, but you're looking for a family and a future. Yet, from what Jade has only briefly mentioned to me in the past couple of days, she’s not, and she’s looking for something very different and totally opposite to what you want.”
“I heard what she said, Daniel, but that’s because Damien hurt her and because Reece is trying to pressure her to go back with his son. Who wouldn’t want to run in the opposite direction? Besides, I just want to get to know her better. It’s not a marriage proposal or a long-term commitment. I just want to see where this goes. I want to see if the attraction that I have for her is mutual, that’s all.” I tried to convince Daniel of my intentions where Jade was concerned, but maybe I needed to convince myself of it as well. I did plan on being with the woman of my dreams within six months and Jade had clearly stated she didn’t want to be anyone’s woman, not now or in six months.
“Can I give you my opinion being Jade’s my best friend and all?” Blaze asked.
“Sure.”
“She is not as tough as she appears, but she can’t let anyone see what both Courtney and Damien did to her was so devastating it nearly wrecked her. She was already fragile when she found them together, but…”
“Because of Jimmy’s death?” I cut her off.
“Yes, because of Jimmy’s dea
th, but in my opinion, there was an underlying cause. Jimmy would have committed suicide regardless of Courtney. She was the means, the excuse if you will, to his demise, but that wasn’t the whole story.”
“I’m not sure I understand what you're saying.” I was thrown off by Blaze’s statement, so she attempted to clear it up for me.
“You had to know Jimmy to know that there was more to Jade’s decision about staying single and avoiding a commitment with someone new than just her breakup with Damien. So let me give you some background on him and the entire situation that I believe is guiding Jade now.”
I nodded and looked at Daniel. He was quiet but reluctantly nodded in agreement. I needed to listen to Blaze before I could move forward with my desire to get to know Jade more intimately.
“You see, Jimmy was filled with this lust for life for a long time. His energy was always positive. He barely said a negative thing about anyone. Everything he did turned to gold, yet he was never conceited. He had it all. He was good-looking, a natural athlete, and he had an incredible head for business. He was comfortable whether he was on a surfboard or in a boardroom. He could command a room just by his presence. People gravitated to him. They loved when he was around. Jade, on the other hand, was not as aggressive as her brother. She, by all means wasn’t meek, but because she at times lived in the shadow of Jimmy’s limelight, she tended to be more reserved and took fewer risks.”
“That must have been awful for her.” It hurt to think that Jade hid in the background of her brother’s popularity. That was one thing I never had to deal with when it came to my brother and me. Michael and I always had gotten along, until recently. We were the best of friends most of our adult lives.
Damn, I miss him.
“Please don’t misunderstand me. She and Jimmy had a great relationship. He never made her feel like she was second best. Neither did Mr. or Mrs. Stanton. In fact, they were extremely proud of Jade and continue to be very supportive of her success. It was Jade’s own insecurities that made her think that she could never measure up to her brother’s accomplishments, but it was also those same insecurities that made her start Summertime Sweets.”
Within Six Months (A Wild Roses Novel Book 1) Page 12
