Worth Forgiving

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by Vi Keeland


  ***

  The waiter seats us at a table for two in the corner next to the floor to ceiling windows that face outside to the streets of Manhattan. A beautiful view of the Brooklyn Bridge lights up the clear night sky off in the distance.

  “You know we’re not getting dessert,” Jax says.

  “Why not?”

  “There’s a mirror calling my name upstairs as soon as you’re done eating.” His voice is low, deep and seductive. I feel the swell in between my legs and cross them to stop it from throbbing. Jax arches an eyebrow with a wicked grin…he knows exactly what I’m doing.

  “What can I get for you to drink this evening?” The waiter hands us both the wine selection menu.

  Jax looks it over quickly, double checking with me before he orders. “Red?”

  “That sounds great.”

  He hands the menu back to the waiter and orders. The waiter nods and disappears. “So you’ve mentioned two glasses of wine makes you sleepy. What does one do?” Jax sips his water eyeing me.

  “Nothing much,” I say, lifting the menu and pretending to read it as I continue. “Except it makes me lose my inhibitions.”

  I glance up, finding a wicked smile spreading across Jax’s handsome face. His eyes sparkle as he leans in to speak. “We could have that glass of wine and skip dinner.”

  “But I was so looking forward to eating yours,” I tease playfully, selecting my words purposefully.

  “Oh. I’ll give you something to eat.”

  My face pinks when the waiter clears his throat, no doubt he’d heard Jax’s last comment.

  “Are you ready to hear the specials?”

  “Are we?” Jax arches an eyebrow, his eyes gleaming with delight. He’s not the slight bit embarrassed, but knows I am and is enjoying himself.

  “Yes. Please.” I give him the evil eye and force my full attention to the waiter. The entire time the waiter talks about the specials I feel Jax’s eyes burning into me.

  “I’ll give you a moment to let you decide.” Graciously, the waiter excuses himself.

  “Why did you do that?” I scold, my voice low.

  “Do what?” He leans back in his seat, crossing his arms over his thick chest.

  “You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

  “Do I?”

  “You enjoy watching me flustered, don’t you?”

  Jax arches both eyebrows. Bad choice of words.

  “You know what I mean.”

  Leaning in, his voice gritty and sexy, he looks me straight in the eyes when he speaks. “I love watching you. Period. But what I like best is watching you pretend you’re unaffected. It’s like an unspoken challenge.” He pauses and leans in even closer. “I love the pink that creeps up your cheeks when I say something dirty. The way your pussy throbs when I mention what I’m going to do to you later, and you wiggle in your seat trying to control it. So yeah, I guess I do like watching you flustered. You sit and give your attention to the waiter, trying to pretend you’re listening to whatever he’s saying instead of thinking of me feeding you my cock later, but we both know you didn’t hear one word he said. Hell I didn’t hear one word watching you, just knowing what you were thinking about.”

  This time, I see the waiter before he’s close enough to hear us. He smiles as he reaches our table. “So what can I get for you this evening? Did I interest you in one of our specials?”

  I look at the waiter, then Jax, who arches an eyebrow with a knowing smirk on his face, then back to the waiter. “The specials all sounded delicious. I just can’t decide for myself. I’m going to defer to my date to pick one for me.” I return my eyes to Jax with a cheeky grin. He throws his head back with a chuckle and looks at the poor confused waiter.

  “We’ll take whatever two are your favorites. Surprise us.”

  ***

  The fact that we are sitting in a five star restaurant in a luxury New York City hotel doesn’t deter Jax from eating half his meal off my plate. “So have you thought about what you’ll do when Joe retires?” Reaching over to my plate, he finishes off my risotto.

  “I have, although the thought of him not being around every day seriously freaks me out. I run the business side of things, but there’s so much I still don’t know about the operations. A few weeks ago I ordered hand wraps for all the locations, they were on sale for a quarter of what we normally pay. It wasn’t the Fairtex brand we usually buy, but I figured a hand wrap is a hand wrap.” I shrug. “Joe got the delivery when it came in. Told me they were too long and too thick, they wouldn’t fit under the gloves. We sent them all back before we opened the cases. I had no idea.”

  “So you’ll hire someone.”

  “That’s easier said than done. You know how many regional managers my dad went through before finding someone he could trust? It seriously took him two years to find Clive, the southern manager. It’s hard finding someone with a good business acumen and a love of the sport.” I sigh. “I had thought Caden might be a good candidate, but I need to seriously start looking.”

  Jax jaw clenches at the mention of Caden. “Maybe you would have been better off finding a partner to help you manage things, rather than a silent investor after all?”

  “I guess we were just worried I’d get stuck with a partner that wanted to turn Ralley’s into a chain with a fancy juice bar and group classes.” I smile thinking of a conversation Dad and Joe had when they were approached by a group that wanted to franchise the gym. “Dad said the day he had to put hangers in the lockers, he was out.”

  Jax furrows his brow. “Hangers?”

  “He didn’t want the gym turning into a place a suit and tie stopped at on his way home from work.”

  “A suit and tie?” He arches an eyebrow. “You mean like me?”

  “You’re not the normal suit and tie.”

  “I’m not huh?”

  “Nope. It wasn’t as much the clothes Joe and Dad were talking about as where the heart of the member lies. They wanted to keep the gym to members whose hearts were in the sport, not a hobby.”

  “So you think my heart is in the right place?” Jax asks, his eyes questioning more than how dedicated he is to the sport.

  Holding his gaze, I tilt my head and search his face. “I do. I think your heart is right where it belongs.”

  A man interrupts. “Jackson, I thought that was you.” He slaps his hand on Jax’s back. He’s tall, probably early sixties, but handsome and very distinguished looking. Jax stands, shaking the man’s hand.

  “Senator Gorman. It’s been a long time.”

  “It certainly has. You haven’t come to the last few Senate family functions. You should come. Your father could certainly use some help with the younger voters.”

  Jax’s jaw clenches and I watch as something comes over him. “Yes, I’m sure he could.” He turns his attention to me, doling out his impeccable manners. “This is Lily St. Claire.”

  The Senator nods. “Nice to meet you Miss. St. Claire.”

  “You too.”

  He studies me for a moment. “Any relation to Phillip St. Claire, the state Senator from New Jersey?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  Remembering the young woman standing next to him, the Senator clears his throat, making the obligatory introduction, albeit uncomfortably. “And this is Eve Matthews. She’s my youth marketing advisor. Keeps me in touch with the young constituents,” he says with a nod to the voluptuous twenty-something year old woman standing next to him.

  There’s little change in Jax’s face, but I catch the tightening of his jaw and the glazed over look in his eyes. He nods in response, saying nothing to the woman. Making his point painfully obvious, Jax’s eyes fall to the Senator’s wedding ring and then his stare returns to the Senator. No words are spoken, yet so much is said.

  Sensing it’s time to go, the Senator fumbles a bit. “Well you two enjoy your evening.” His hand drops to the woman’s lower back, a little too low and familiar in his touch for an exchange
between just business associates. Jax’s eyes catch it to. Turning back, he says, “I hope to see you following your father’s footsteps, Jackson. You’d make a fine Senator someday. You’re so much like your father was at your age.”

  Seething, Jax replies, “I’m nothing like my father.” Dismissing the Senator as he sits down, he doesn’t offer so much as a look back.

  We’re both quiet for a long moment. The waiter interrupts the thick tension that hangs in the air when he comes to check on us. “Can I interest you in the dessert menu?”

  Jax looks to me, his face still riddled with tension, I debate my answer for a moment and then respond. I feel the heat rise in my face before I even finish the sentence. “No thank you. We’ve already made plans for dessert in our room.”

  Jax’s eyebrows pop up with surprise. The corner of his mouth twitches up. “Just the check, please.” Speaking directly to me instead of the waiter, he adds. “And if you can get us out of here in one minute or less, I’ll double your tip.”

  We’re weaving our way out of the restaurant with purpose sixty seconds later.

  Chapter 20

  Jax

  Thoughts of all the things I want to do to her beat out any of the frustration I felt listening to Senator Gorman speak. The elevator fills as an older couple holds the door open for some friends. Lily brushes up against me as she takes a step back. Her sweet fresh smell consumes me with her nearness.

  “You smell incredible,” I mumble quietly in her ear so only she can hear. My fingertips grip her hipbone on both sides and I pull her back, closing the small gap between us. Her breath hitches when I discreetly push my firm erection against her ass. She elbows me as the doors close in the near capacity elevator car. It only encourages me more.

  After four achingly long stops on different floors, it’s only us and another couple. I catch our reflection in the shining silver doors and slide my hand hidden against the wall from her hip down to her thigh. “Look forward,” I whisper.

  Her eyes lock with mine in the reflection. The doors open and the last two people step out. When our reflection comes back into focus as the doors slide closed, I reach up and roughly cup her breast. Her eyes go wide, but she gives in to it quickly when I pinch her protruding nipple. I watch intently as her head lolls back, lips part and her breathing turns harsh when I bring the other hand up to grope her other breast. My head spins watching her – I want to be inside her, make her scream my name over and over so it consumes her and she can think of nothing else but how I make her feel.

  Reaching the penthouse, the elevator door opens. Briefly I contemplate staying where we are. My need is so raw and I can’t wait too much longer to feel skin against skin. But out of the corner of my eye, a camera reminds me we’re not really alone.

  “Mirror. Now,” I growl and begin to guide her quickly through the suite. Stopping us in the doorway to the closet, I let her gaze settle on the dressing island in the middle and the oversized mirror hanging in front of it.

  “You’re going to lean over, grip the other side with your hands.” She gasps, picturing it before us. “Spread your legs open wide. Position your sweet ass high for me.” My grip on her hip tightens, maybe a bit more that it should, but it’s either that or it’ll be over too fast. “I want you to see everything you do to me in the mirror while I watch you take each inch of me deep inside of you. Don’t close your eyes. Watch. Every minute of what I’m going to do to you, Angel.”

  She murmurs something I can’t understand, I’m not even sure if they’re words or just a string of sounds blending together with a moan and a sigh that I feel pulsing through my body. I swallow, my mouth salivating at the thought of fucking her for hours. Taking a deep breath, I resist the unbearable urge to just strip her down and drive my throbbing cock inside of her as hard and fast as I can. Instead, I turn her and take her mouth in a kiss. It’s passionate and raw, I use all my willpower to keep it from becoming too forceful. The need inside of me is so strong, I’m afraid to allow it to consume me too much. Afraid I’ll scare her. The way I feel about this woman, so intense and powerful, it scares the hell out of me.

  Lily makes it even more difficult to contain my self-control when she presses her breasts into me firmly, lifts one leg high, and wraps it around my waist. The pointy heel from her sexy shoes dig into my skin. I grab her ass and lift, her other leg wraps tightly around me. I feel how wet she is between her legs even though we’re both still fully dressed. It makes my body tremble as I cling to my last bit of resolve to maintain some semblance of control. But then her hand wrapped around my neck moves to my hair and she tugs. Hard. Her newfound boldness is my undoing.

  I carry her to the dresser and lower her to the ground, turning her before her feet barely reach the surface. Not willing to waste another second to be inside her, I lift her skirt and tear her panties from her body with one swift tug. She gasps but I don’t give her time to catch her breath before my own pants are down and my hand on her back eases her forward.

  “Grab.” I bend her over the dresser and instruct her to take hold of the other side. She’s definitely going to need to hold on. Looking down at the creamy skin of her smooth, tight ass, a feral sound I don’t even recognize escapes me. I position the thick, wide head of my cock at her glistening opening and growl one more command. “Watch,” I instruct and our eyes meet in the reflection of the mirror. Her blue eyes darkened and hooded, I find my own desire staring back at me.

  Thrusting my hips forward I fill her in one long stroke, our eyes never breaking contact. I settle for a moment, circling my hips to ease her body’s acceptance of me. The pressure builds from deep within, the minute I begin to move again, a fast and furious rhythm takes over me. Eyes glued to the mirror watching her, I pump in and out, my pace building faster, each gyration of my hips bringing me closer and closer. Her eyes glaze over and I know she’s feeling it too. Feeling each and every incredible sensation as her muscles convulse and she clenches down around me and I swell at feeling her greedy pussy milk me.

  Swift thrusts turn into rugged pounding and I struggle just to keep my own unrelenting pace. Lily’s eyes start to roll into the back of her head as her own orgasm takes over her. But I call her name, her eyes jarring back to awareness momentarily, then glazing over as she calls my name back. Over and over again, my eyes glued to her lips moaning my name, the sound consuming me as I find my own release. The heat from my own orgasm spilling into her causes my body to spasm with delight until I’m finally empty.

  Leaning over her, our bodies both covered in a sheen of sweat, I bury my face in her neck as I catch my breath. Eventually my panting slows and I can finally find my voice. “That was seriously fucking incredible.”

  I can’t see her face, but I watch as a goofy grin slowly spreads across her face. “Remind me to find someone to piss you off more often.”

  ***

  Lying in bed, both sated from a physically and emotionally intense night of passion, I watch her face as she deliberates for a few minutes before she speaks. “How long are you staying in New York?” She trails her fingers lightly back and forth across my chest, her head snuggled into the crook of my shoulder as I gently stroke her hair in the dark.

  “I was only planning on staying until the deal with Ralley’s is finished.” It would be the perfect moment to tell her the group of investors I’m bringing to the table is a group of one. Me. But I want to wait till the deal is done, not influence any of her and Joe’s decisions because of our relationship. Plus, the bank hasn’t signed off on the financing yet and things could still fall through. Lily may not be happy when she eventually finds out I’ve hidden that I’m the investor, but I think she’ll understand my reasoning. I don’t want what we have to sway her in negotiations – keeping silent protects her more than me.

  “How long is that?” she asks hesitantly.

  “Not too much longer. There’s this woman that gives me everything I need over at Ralley’s. Got the financing fast tracked by having it al
l put together so nicely,” I tease. “Should be done within a few days.”

  “Oh,” she says sounding deflated.

  I turn us, gently maneuvering her onto her back, so I can see her face. The room is dark but there’s enough moonlight peaking in from the open window to see her eyes. I wipe a stray lock of hair from her face. “But I didn’t plan on meeting you.”

  She nods, but says nothing.

  I lean in, kissing her on the neck. “Guess my plans have changed.” I leave a trail of wetness as I lick my way up to her ear where I whisper, “You’ve changed my plans, Lily St. Claire.”

  Chapter 21

  Lily

  There’s almost always a lull in the middle of a powerful storm. The eye that catches people unprepared because they’ve let their guard down. I should feel calm, happy even. Lord knows I’ve had twenty-four hours of bliss. I smile as I walk from the subway, cutting across the parking lot on the way to Advanced Linear Drawing class, thinking of Jax last night. Seeing his face in my mind warms me all over. Yet something sits in the pit of my stomach, warning me that I shouldn’t give in to the lull, even though allowing myself to wouldn’t take much.

  Cars fill almost every spot in the lot, yet there are few people milling around. Early morning college classes tend to be for commuters rather than the younger crew that lives on campus. The kind that come and go with purpose, rather than hanging out with their friends beforehand. I look around, no one seems to be near, yet I have the odd sensation of being watched. Just as I’m about to enter the building, I catch sight of a black town car slowly rolling by. The windows are tinted dark, so I can’t see inside, but I have the distinct feeling whoever is inside is looking back at me. It drives off without incident a moment later.

  Headphones on, Dave Matthew’s soulful voice fills my ears as I allow myself to get lost sketching. The model isn’t nude today, but he’s shirtless. Thin, more boyish than man. More Reed’s type than mine. Adding charcoal, I shade the fine line of his pectoral muscles, the definition coming more from being thin and lacking body fat than the development of actual muscle. Unlike Jax.

 

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