The Minnesota Candidate

by Nicholas Antinozzi

  “How nice,” said a strangely familiar voice, “we have some more company.”

  Tom raised his eyes and found that he was staring down the barrels of several guns. “Oh shit,” he grunted, raising his hands in the air. The men behind the guns were well-dressed and each wore dark sunglasses.

  “And will you look at that?” asked the familiar voice. “They’ve even brought us the journals. Well, miracles never cease. I’ll be taking those.”

  “They don’t belong to you,” said Chona, angrily. “You can’t have them.”

  “My dear, I’m the President of the United States. I can have anything I want.”

  Slowly, Tom was able to make out the figure behind the men with guns, whom Tom now recognized as Secret Service Agents; the man was none other than President Peabody, there was no mistaking him for anyone else. Peabody was a jug-eared runt of a man, with an upturned nose and cold blue eyes. He was smiling as he approached Chona.

  “Don’t you hurt her!” shouted a voice. Tom thought the voice sounded like it belonged to Merle Levitz. He looked around the ransacked lab until he spotted Levitz, clinging to the bars of a tiny cell.

  “Shoot them all if any of them moves,” ordered Peabody. He wore a presidential ball cap and was dressed in a bomber jacket over a white shirt and khaki trousers. “Welcome to my little search party,” he said, jerking the journals away from Chona. “On behalf of the American people, I’d like to thank you all for your service.”

  “You’ll never get away with this, Peabody,” growled Chona.

  “That’s President Ali Mohamed,” corrected the diminutive president. “Haven’t you heard? I’ve converted to Islam.”

  “How very original,” she hissed.

  “It suits my purposes. Besides, I just love the irony. Please, don’t call me that. The name is strictly for business purposes.”

  One of the Secret Service Agents chuckled, but he was silenced by the icy glare of his five peers. “What do you hope to accomplish?” asked Chona. “Why are you doing this?”

  Peabody now stood at a work station and he was leafing through the journals. He ignored Chona’s question and Tom let his eyes wander around the mammoth laboratory. The ceiling was at least forty feet tall and everything was either white or stainless steel. He tried to imagine it before it had been ransacked. There were machines of all sizes and shapes, and there were so many, Tom was certain that Shari’s father must have employed a team of scientists to assist him in his research. In the very center of the room was what appeared to be a giant steel hatch, set into the tile floor. As strange as that was, Tom barely noticed it. What captured his attention were the painted eyeballs. They seemed to be everywhere, but they were never in pairs. Single eyeballs, in all shapes and sizes, they seemed to stare back at him with some kind of hidden knowledge.

  “Why am I doing this?” asked Peabody, rhetorically. “Do you have any idea what you’re even asking? I’m merely looking for an insurance policy. You don’t understand what’s happening in the world, do you?”

  “Well,” said Chona, “no I don’t. Could you please explain it to me?”

  “Have you studied these journals?”

  “I’ve read them, if that’s what you mean. I wouldn’t go as far as to say that I’ve studied them.”

  “I’m guessing that you’re down here looking for Munthon’s ray gun, am I right?”

  Chona shrugged her shoulders.

  “Don’t lie to me. Get over here and show me where to look. I have a schedule to keep. I’ll explain everything to you as we go over the journals.”

  “Fine,” spat Chona, “you’re just going to kill us, anyway.”

  “Perhaps, but I can guarantee you that your deaths will be far less painful than the one that’s in store for Senator Levitz.”

  “You can’t kill me!” shouted Levitz. “I’m the Chosen One!”

  Peabody laughed at that. “I take it that you didn’t tell him?” he quietly asked Chona, as she stepped next to him.

  “How could I?”

  “What was that?” called Levitz, from across the room inside his cell. “Let me out of here!”

  Peabody shook his head and returned his attention to Chona. “It’s really a shame about Doctor Munthon. He was a brilliant man, but he was too smart for his own good. They don’t like independent thinkers. That’s why he had to go.”

  “They?” asked Chona. “Who are they?”

  Peabody seemed surprised by the question. “Why, the Illuminati, of course,” he said, “the people who run the show. You don’t really believe that people like me are involved in the real decision making, do you? I’m nothing more than a puppet on a string.”

  Chona looked up from the journal and stared at Peabody. “Do you really expect me to believe that?”

  “Kid, I don’t give a damn what you believe. But you had better believe this, our world is about to undergo some radical changes. The Illuminati have been busy aligning the stars for a very long time. Everything you see, everything you hear, everything you believe, it’s all carefully controlled by them. Why, at this very moment, you’re probably carrying around several of Doctor Munthon’s microchips. Most Americans are. Your life has been thoroughly examined and classified as either essential, or non-essential.”

  “That’s despicable. What kind of people would do such a thing?”

  Peabody smiled and held up one finger. “That’s where you’re wrong,” he said, “they’re not people, not like you and I. The Illuminati aren’t of this world.”

  “You must be crazy to believe something like that.”

  Peabody laughed and shook his impish head. “They’re from the Dark World, preparing the way for their Dark Master. My dear girl, you have read the Bible, haven’t you? It’s all in there, every last word of it.”

  “If that’s true, then why aren’t you fighting them? We can still beat these monsters. Have you ever stopped to think that you might have been classified as non-essential?”

  Peabody shook his head. “I’m the President of the United States,” he said, proudly, “And they need me right where I am.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong!” shouted Levitz. “I’m going to beat you in the November election!”

  “Good luck with that!” hollered Peabody. “There isn’t going to be a November election. As a matter of fact, there aren’t going to be any more elections, period. This country is in a State of Emergency, and it’s going to stay there, indefinitely. We still have a war on terror, Senator Levitz.”

  “That’s insane,” gasped Chona, “you can’t win a war against an ideology.”

  “So, you’re not as dumb as I thought.”

  “The people won’t stand for it.”

  “The people won’t have a choice. By November, they’ll have forgotten all about their precious elections. They’ll have forgotten about their guns and their freedom. They’ll listen to whatever we tell them to do.”

  Tom and Sam exchanged a worried look. Tom could see that Sam was busy doing the math, plotting a strategy to overtake the Secret Service Agents. Tom gave him a slight shake of his head. With four guns trained on them and two on Chona, there was no hope of escape. Much to Tom’s relief, Sam gave him a reluctant nod.

  “You’re stalling,” said Peabody. “Where did Munthon hide that ray gun?”

  Shari held up one of the journals and she looked around the room. “I can’t really tell, but it looks like it could be somewhere around those cabinets.”

  Peabody pointed from Tom and Sam, to the cabinets. “You heard her,” he said. “Get over there and start searching. You men, keep an eye on them. They mean nothing to me, so if you think you need to kill one to see some results, you have my permission.”

  “Yes sir,” barked one of the men in suits. The black-haired man motioned to Tom and Sam with his gun. “You heard the President. Get moving!”

  Tom and Sam were ushered over to a long bank of white cabinets. The doors hung open with their contents strewn onto th
e white tile floor; many of the cabinets were dented and hanging open by just a single hinge. Just seeing this made Tom angry. “You guys didn’t have to make such a mess down here,” he said. “This doesn’t belong to you.”

  “Excuse me?” asked Peabody. “Who do you think funded this project? The taxpayers of the United States, that’s who built and equipped this laboratory. Do you think this place was chosen by accident?” Peabody pointed to the massive hatch that was built into the floor. “Behold, the Gates of Hades, the Portal to Hell. When the Illuminati gives me the green light, we’re going to open that door,” Peabody said, walking over to stand in front of Tom. “What do you know of Fred? I knew Fred Munthon when he was still experimenting with vacuum tubes. If it wasn’t for me, he would still be doing it.”

  “If it wasn’t for you,” said Tom, “he’d still be alive.”

  Peabody shook his head. “That’s where you’re wrong. The Illuminati had Fred and Irene killed. I had nothing to do with that decision. I keep trying to tell you that I’m just a pawn in all of this. Never mind, just find me that damned ray gun!”

  Tom and Sam began to paw through the looted cabinets, searching for secret compartments and hidden levers.

  “What about me?” shouted Levitz, who was still hanging from the bars of his cell. “You must still need me if I’m still alive.”

  “Oh, we need you, Merle,” chuckled Peabody. “Have you ever heard of the Cerberus?”

  “Are you talking about the three-headed dog that guards the gate of Hades?”

  “Yes, that’s the one. Well, let’s just say that he’s hungry and he’s very fussy about what he eats.”

  “You didn’t need to tell him that,” growled Chona.

  “Looks like that cat is outta the bag,” whispered Sam.

  “I don’t believe you,” shouted Levitz. “And I don’t believe in the Cerberus!”

  Peabody roared with laughter. He then turned to Chona. “Now, where were we?” he asked.

  “Your plan will never work,” said Chona. “Even if you’re able to get the entire world to convert to Islam, they’ll just band together to rise up against you.”

  “Oh look, I’m shaking in my boots,” scoffed Peabody. “That’s the one thing we never have to worry about. You can’t get the Sunni and Shiites to agree on anything. Don’t even get me started on the extremists. They hate everyone. Do you know why terrorist organizations like Boco Haram, Al Qaeda, the Taliban, do what they do? They want to draw us back into another war in the Middle East. This has never been a secret. Their plan is to keep drawing the west into these wars until we’re financially ruined. That isn’t as crazy as it sounds. Do you know what caused the collapse of the Soviet Union? It was their war in Afghanistan. Knowing that, what did we do? We spent trillions on wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. We walked right into their trap. You think about that.”

  “That’s insane,” snapped Chona.

  “Maybe, but we can’t beat those people. That’s why we decided to join them.”

  “What kind of logic is that? You’ll never get away with it.”

  “I’m just a cog in the wheel.”

  “You were elected to defend the American people.”

  “You still believe in election results?” asked Peabody, his face showing shock. “Do you still believe in Santa, too?”

  “You’ll burn in hell for this.”

  “Kid, nobody is going to hell. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. Hell is coming to us.”

  “Not if we can stop you!” cried Levitz.

  Peabody laughed at that. “Tell that to the Cerberus,” he shouted. “Look, this has been a lot of fun, but I’m out of time. It would have been nice to have Fred’s ray gun, but I can live without it. I have other matters to attend to. I’m sorry, you seem like nice people, but now you know too much. That’s what happens when you get too close to the flame.”

  Chapter 29

  They weren’t dead. Doris knew that the moment she tripped and fell, quite painfully, onto her face. Hovering over her was Marie. “You’re as clumsy as an ox,” she said. “Where do you suppose we are?”

  Doris pushed herself up and climbed to her feet. “I don’t know,” she grunted, “but could someone turn down the lights? My eyes are burning.”

  “Quit your bitching. There is no pleasing you, Doris. First you complain about the dark and then you complain about the light. You’re always doing that. Can’t you ever be happy?”

  “I’ll be happy when we’re out of here.”

  “You’ll never be happy.”

  Doris blinked until her eyes adjusted to the white light. They were standing in some type of underground garage. There were two loading docks at one end and there was plenty of clearance for trucks to maneuver in and out. A long tunnel ran away from the garage, disappearing around a bend. “I wonder where that goes,” she said, pointing at the tunnel.

  “That must be the secret entrance,” said Marie. “This is just like the Bat Cave.”

  Doris nodded her head. There were three black vehicles parked in the garage. One was a Cadillac limousine and the other two were black SUV’s. “Maybe we can drive out in one of those,” she said. “Because I’m not leaving the same way we came in.”

  “You can say that again, sister. But we’re not leaving just yet. We’ve still got some money to collect.”

  Doris was physically exhausted, but she knew that Marie was right. They might never get another opportunity to search the house. They had to keep going. There were several doors near the loading docks. Doris chose one and she began to walk toward it. Marie followed along. “How long do you think those cars have been down here?” asked Doris, pointing to the stretch limousine.

  “Probably five years,” said Marie. “I’ll bet we’re the first people to have been down here since Shari’s parents died.”

  “I’m sure we are,” agreed Doris, walking up to the door. She tried the handle and found it was unlocked. The door opened into a long, brightly-lit, corridor, where several other doors stood to either side. Marie and Doris continued inside, pushing doors open as they walked along. Most of the rooms were small and filled with office and lab supplies, but there was no question that someone had been there before them. The shelves were swept clean and the floors were covered in debris.

  “Son of a bitch,” muttered Marie. “This doesn’t look good.”

  “What do you think they were looking for?”

  “How the hell am I supposed to know? I’m not a mind reader.”

  “Well, I don’t think they’re looking for money. Why would they look for money in supply closets?”

  “I don’t know,” said Marie, “probably for the same reason that we’re looking for money in supply closets. Do you ever listen to yourself?”

  Doris twisted around and pointed a finger at Marie. “Why would I? Nobody else does.”

  “Huh? Look, whatever… just forget about it. I’m starting to think that maybe those cars haven’t been here long. I think that whoever they belong to, those people are somewhere ahead of us, looking to take what’s rightfully ours. We have to find them and kick ‘em out of here. Look at this mess they’re making. What business do they have being down here? You’re Shari’s mother in-law. You have a right to be here.”

  Doris was still angry with Marie for her earlier comment, but she couldn’t help but to agree with her. Wherever they were, this was still part of Shari and Tommy’s house, or so she thought. Whoever was ahead of them, Doris was sure they had no business being down there. “That’s right,” she said, squatting down to pick up the broken leg of a steel table, “those people are trespassing. We have to find them.”

  “You’re exactly right,” said Marie.

  They continued walking down the corridor, opening doors and finding that each room had been tossed like a bad salad. Marie armed herself with a ballpeen hammer and the two women grew angrier with every step. At the end of the corridor, they entered a long, rectangular room, filled with odd-look
ing machines. Broken tiles from the suspended ceiling were scattered on the floor like mutant snowflakes. There was no sign of the people responsible for the mess. “Those bastards,” said Doris, pointing to a sleek machine that appeared to be straight out of a science fiction movie. “We might have been able to sell that.”

  “You’re damn right,” replied Marie, slapping the business end of the hammer into her palm. “Do you know what this place is? This is a laboratory. I’ll bet these machines cost a small fortune. Look at them, now. This is bullshit, Doris.”

  They waded into the ruined laboratory, picking their way along the aisle of smashed machines and broken dreams. Doris felt a surge of helpless anger and she smashed her table leg against some stainless steel shelving. There was a thunderous crash and the empty shelving unit teetered, before it toppled over and smashed to the floor. Satisfied, Doris looked for something else to swat.

  Marie grabbed her by the shoulder. “Knock it off,” she hissed. “We were trying to get the jump on them. Now they know that they’re not alone. That was really stupid.”

  Doris was about to reply, when something caught her eye on the white tile floor. The floor appeared to be seamless, except for a small square that seemed to be cut into the floor underneath where the shelf had been. Inset into the square was a small steel ring.

  “We’ve got to get out of here,” said Marie. “We don’t want to be cornered in here like a couple of trapped rats.”

  Doris barely heard her. She was already on her knees. She reached down and pulled up on the ring. The square of tile was much heavier than she imagined, but she heaved on the ring and it popped free. She turned to face Marie, but she was already halfway to the door. “I found something!” she shouted. “Hang on!”

  “Lock them up with the Chosen One,” ordered Peabody, but just as he said that, a loud crash echoed from the next room. He spun around. “What the hell was that?”

  The crash was followed by a much larger crash. Tom closed his eyes, positive that he knew the source of the racket. Sam turned to him. “I guess we know where your ma is,” he whispered.