The Doctor's Nanny

by Emerson Rose

  I walk through the kitchen and out onto the deck to join Julián. He turns and flashes me his familiar smile like nothing is wrong.

  “Hey.” He reaches for me and I go to him. He pulls me into his side and kisses my temple. “I missed you two. I’m about to put the meat on and the salad is ready, I put it in the fridge.”

  “Oh, okay, thank you for cooking.”

  “No problem. Did you get some work done?”

  “Yeah, I did, thanks.” I was ready to come out her and hash this all out but he’s acting like nothing happened. Should I bring it up and risk an argument or take the easy route and go with the flow? Going with the flow guarantees a nice quiet dinner with my husband-to-be.

  Hounding him about what’s bothering him is sure to ruin our evening. Do I want instant gratification or answers?

  Instant gratification.

  “I’ll go get the stroller and we can take a walk after we eat.”

  “That sounds nice.” I stand on my tiptoes and kiss him on the cheek. We go about our nice suburban family evening without a word about Caleb or whatever is bothering Julián and it is instantly gratifying just like I wanted.

  Our problems will have to be addressed eventually, just not today.

  Chapter 22

  Garcia

  I pull the pale blue sheet over her slightly sunburned shoulder and smooth her hair back off of her face. She doesn’t move, she’s exhausted and sleeping like the dead. I sit on the edge of the bed and watch her sleep for a long time. I could do it all night if I didn’t need to get a couple of hours of sleep myself before the king of the castle wakes us up.

  He is hungry every three hours like clockwork and he doesn’t give us much warning when he wakes up. One minute we are in the third stage of REM sleep having an awesome dream and the next we are standing in the nursery trying to console a screaming baby wondering where the hell we are.

  I bend down to kiss her forehead and notice her phone in her hand. She must have fallen to sleep before she put it on the charger. I slide it out of her limp hand and reach for the cord to plug it in but when I do the usual chime that tells you it’s charging doesn’t sound.

  I tap the screen and still nothing. I press the power button on the side and hold it until the familiar apple appears on the screen. She turned it off, that’s not like her.

  I lay it on the nightstand and wait for it to finish powering on. When the picture of the three of us in the hospital bed shows up, I notice she has three unread messages.

  I stand up and go to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Staring into the mirror I wonder why she shut her phone off and if it was on purpose to avoid reading the messages that were being sent.

  Three months ago I wouldn’t have considered looking at her private messages. Three months ago we were living in California far away from my brothers and her ex-husband who didn’t want anything to do with his unborn son.

  I know it’s wrong but I wish that conniving motherfucker would crawl back into the hole he was hiding in until a couple of weeks ago. I also wish I would have never accepted the relocation to North Carolina.

  I rinse, spit, and shut off the bathroom light. After one last check on Grayson, I crawl into bed behind Kimber and wrap my arms around her waist and spoon her.

  I look at her phone and something feels wrong. I want to look at her messages. No, I can’t, it’s an invasion of her privacy and I don’t want to stir up trouble.

  What kind of trouble would I be stirring up, though? There shouldn’t be anything to hide, there shouldn’t be anything there worth reading. I’m being paranoid, I need to shut my fucking eyes and go to sleep.

  Then I see her phone light up. Another text. Who would be sending her a text at eleven thirty at night?

  That’s it. I’m looking at her messages. I reach over and press against her body to unplug the phone. She makes a soft sound that tells me she is still very much asleep. We know each other’s passwords and we have each other’s fingerprints entered in our phones, no secrets, and no lies, hide nothing. That was always our motto, until lately.

  I press my thumb on the home button and the screen switches to the last text conversation she had, with Caleb. I scan through it and focus on the last four messages he sent to her after she shut off her phone, including the one he just left a couple of seconds ago.

  6:30 p.m. Caleb – Please don’t shut me out, Kimmie. I’m trying to do the right thing here. I know it’s probably too late for us but I don’t want to screw things up with our son.

  6:32 p.m. Caleb – Kimmie?

  6:33 p.m. Caleb – You shut your phone off, didn’t you? I remember when you couldn’t live fifteen minutes without your phone. You always had you nose in it. You were bored; I didn’t pay enough attention to you, I left you alone too often. I was selfish and egotistical and I blamed you when I went looking for someone to take your place so I wouldn’t feel bad about cheating. It wasn’t your fault, nothing that went wrong with our marriage was your fault, it was all mine. I’m sorry, it doesn’t mean much now but I want you know that I am. The only way I can prove to you how sorry I am and start making up for all I’ve done is to be a great dad to our beautiful baby boy. I can’t believe how much he looks like you, Kimmie, he’s gorgeous, sweet, and perfect, like you.

  11:50 p.m. Caleb – Please, reconsider meeting with me tomorrow. I’ll be at the diner at one o’clock either way. Take care.

  So she’s seen him, and he’s seen Grayson. When did all of this happen and why didn’t she tell me? That bastard is trying to win her back, what the fucking fuck? I roll away from her onto my back and drop the phone on the bed next to me.

  He fell in love with Grayson today? Why does that sound so fucking fake and corny? Because coming from him it is.

  I fell in love with Grayson the day he was born but I like to think that I loved him through his mother the last half of her pregnancy. I talked to her belly and played music through my headphones for him at night. He used to kick the crap out of me when I pressed my face on her beach ball belly.

  He wants her, that’s got to be why he’s doing this, but why now? Maybe it does have something to do with breaking up with his girlfriend but it doesn’t feel like it. He can’t want money from her. She doesn’t have more than your average, single career-woman has. She makes a good living and has a savings account and a pension but that’s not going to help him if he’s in financial trouble.

  He isn’t in any trouble that requires him to be married. Detective Brown checked, no charges have been filed against him, there are no leans or outstanding loans that could destroy him.

  He fucked up and it took him a whole year to realize it. It’s the only thing that makes sense and that’s good because I can work with that. Kimber loves me, I know she does, I feel it deep in my gut. She wouldn’t step out on me. She’s just confused right now because this guy is throwing warm, fuzzy feel-goods at her. He’s messing with her head.

  I’m buzzing with anger, no way am I sleeping now. I grab her phone and get out of bed. On my way downstairs I make a decision. I’m going to meet him myself tomorrow at the diner and tell him to back the fuck off. If he wants shared custody fine, go through the courts and get it but leave my fiancé alone. I’m going to have to deal with this asshole for the rest of my life. He’s Grayson’s dad and if he wants to be involved he’s going to be but that’s it, nothing else.

  I grab a beer from the fridge and go outside on the deck. It’s warm out and the locusts are buzzing so loud it distracts me from my homicidal thoughts for a while. A rabbit runs across the yard and I sit up on the chaise to see if something is chasing it.

  “What are you doing out here? It’s past midnight? And you’re drinking a beer?” Kimber is standing in the kitchen just inside the patio door with sleepy eyes holding Grayson.

  I look down at her phone in my hand to check the time as if it were my own. We have identical phones so she probably won’t even notice. “Actually, it’s past one. I couldn’t sleep and the be
er, I don’t know,” I say with a shrug holding up the half empty bottle.

  She pushes the door open and steps out. “Why? You don’t usually have trouble sleeping.”

  “I don’t know, I have a lot on my mind, I guess, couldn’t shut it off.”

  She moves to stand next to me and I scoot over so they can sit with me on the wide chaise lounger. It’s tight but I wrap my arm around her to keep her from falling off.

  “I’m sorry. I feel like you’re being dragged into such a mess because of me.”

  “It’s not your fault, it’s his for being an indecisive douche.” I squeeze her and she smiles.

  “You didn’t sign up for all of this. I thought he was out of my life forever. I still can’t believe this is happening.”

  “I signed up for anything that comes along with you, baby. For better and for worse, remember?”

  “You’re such a good man, I hate burdening you with my problems.”

  “Our problems.”

  She rests her head on my shoulder and we stare down at the person behind it all. Who would have thought such a tiny innocent kid could be the cause of so much trouble? Grayson starts to fuss as if to prove my point. I help them out of the chair and we head back to bed. I need to get some sleep. I have a lunch date with a motherfucker tomorrow.

  Chapter 23

  Kimber

  He knows. When we went back to bed last night he thought I wouldn’t notice that it was my phone missing from the nightstand and not his. I probably wouldn’t have except I turned mine off. Both phones were on and charging when I came back from feeding Grayson.

  He never let on. We slept in each other’s arms until six o’clock this morning when he got up and went to work and I went to make sure Grayson was breathing. He’s never slept that long at night without waking up.

  My pulse pounded in my ears when I crept up to his crib to check on him. I found him lying on his back with his hands splayed out above his head on the mattress, sleeping… well, sleeping like a baby. That must be why it’s such a perfect expression, nobody sleeps better than a baby, when they sleep that is.

  Worrying about Grayson and going through our morning ritual meant no time with Julián before he left for work. He kissed my cheek and then Grayson’s and left.

  My phone alarm goes off at seven o’clock, as if I need an alarm with a six-week-old baby. I unplug it from the charger. My text message with Caleb is still pulled up on the screen but I notice there are a few more entries than I remember. I shut it off but that didn’t stop Caleb from sending texts.

  I groan and read through them. Oh God, Julián read these. It wasn’t bad enough that he read the ones I knew about but these… What the hell is wrong with Caleb? How can he even mention that it’s probably too late? There’s no probably about it, our marriage is ancient history.

  If I hadn’t met Julián, I might have been weak enough to fall for this shit but not now. I know what real love feels like and I would never go back to the superficial shallow kind of love that my marriage to Caleb was made of.

  At least he knows I’m not meeting with him today. That should provide him with some reassurance. But we are going to have to talk about it tonight. We can’t go on keeping secrets to save the other’s feelings. That’s a death sentence for any relationship.

  I check on Grayson in his crib and take the video monitor downstairs to the kitchen to make myself something to eat. I think I’ll call Tiana this morning and see if she wants to go running with me. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen her heading out early to run a couple times and it would be nice to have somebody to talk to.

  I push down the toaster lever lowering a piece of wheat toast into the slots when the doorbell rings. I freeze with my hands on the counter. I’m not expecting a package or company today. Who’s ringing my bell at this hour?

  Shit, I hope it’s not Caleb. I told him I wasn’t meeting with him today but he’s a persistent bastard, it wouldn’t surprise me if he showed up as soon as Julián left.

  At least I’m dressed and wearing a lot more than I was yesterday. I never felt so exposed in a linen blouse, short shorts and flip-flops as I did in the grocery store with Caleb yesterday. The baggy denim overalls and cotton T-shirt I have on today are a safer choice.

  The bell rings again when my toast pops up. I toss it on a plate and pad through the house to the front door. Our door is solid wood with a peephole instead of the glass paned doors I usually put on homes that I renovate. I have had my eye on one at a local hardware store but with the baby I haven’t gotten around to buying it.

  When I look through the peephole I’m glad I can see out and the men on the other side of the door can’t see in.

  There are two of them. Both appear to be around my age, both handsome in very different ways and dressed in expensive clothes. Not fancy clothes but good brands that I recognize right away.

  The thing that makes me nervous is that I have never seen them before, although, one does look familiar. I’m a woman at home with a baby, it’s seven thirty in the morning and I have two intimidating men on my porch.

  One of them, the one who looks familiar is swaying back and forth with his hands in his pockets nervously. The other is staring off to the side toward the street looking bored.

  The nervous one reaches to ring the bell again for the third time and I know there is no ignoring them. I either have to answer the door or say something through it.

  “Hello?” I say cringing with my cheek pressed against the door. I do not want to talk to these guys. Please God, let them be vacuum salesmen or something so I can tell them no thanks and go back to my toast.

  “Kimber?”

  Shit, they know my name.

  “Who’s there?”

  “We’re Julián’s brothers. We were in town, heard you two were getting hitched and that you had a baby. We wanted to stop by and congratulate ya’ll.”

  Julian’s brothers, what the hell? I knew he had siblings but that’s about it. He has always been oddly vague about his family. He says they don’t get along and he doesn’t speak to them, or at least I didn’t think so. But somehow they know about the wedding and our baby.

  I don’t even know his parent’s names. He told me when we met that he doesn’t have anything in common with anyone in his family. He says their morals clash. I never pressed him because Julián’s morals are pretty amazing and I figured if his were so different from theirs they must not be good people.

  I don’t want these men to know I’m alone. I got a bad vibe after one glance through a peephole and I’m pretty good at reading people, I trust my gut.

  I also don’t want to let on that I have no idea who they are. They know a lot more about me than I know about them. I don’t like being at such a disadvantage.

  “Well, hey there, guys, it’s nice to finally meet you. It’s a little early, though, I’m busy with the baby maybe you could come by later on this afternoon?” I say in my best friendly girl-next-door voice.

  I peer though the hole to see how they react. The talker looks at the other man with raised eyebrows. A shiver runs up my spine and I wonder if the back door is locked, and also the windows. Shit, why didn’t I listen to Julián?

  “We’re flying out in a couple of hours, sis. We won’t have time to come back. Sure would like to meet you before we go, though.”

  The one doing all the talking looks at the quiet one and he nods his head with approval. He likes that excuse.

  I tiptoe as fast as I can back down the hall into the kitchen and make sure the back door is locked, it is. On the way back, I check the windows and lock two of the four.

  It only takes me a few seconds but my lack of response doesn’t go unnoticed.

  “Kimber? You’re not gonna ignore your new family now, are ya?

  I’m panting when I arrive back at the front door. “No, of course not. Let me put the baby down and I’ll be right back.”

  They shrug at the same time and one rolls his eyes and takes a seat on the wooden
park bench on the porch.

  I race upstairs and look in on Grayson. He’s sleeping, good. He’s so tiny and vulnerable, how can I keep him safe if those guys decide to break into the house?

  The gun sitting in the safe downstairs flashes through my mind. I don’t even know how to shoot it but they don’t know that. It’s better than nothing.

  I slide my phone out of my pocket and text Julián.

  7:45 a.m. Me -- Your brothers are here, they’re at the front door and want to meet the baby and me.

  Immediately the bubbles under my message begin to ripple as he types his response. He’s just getting to the base, twenty minutes away if he didn’t make any stops.

  7:45 a.m. Julián – Do not answer the door. Tell them you’re busy.

  7:46 a.m. Me – I did! They said they have to catch a flight this afternoon and can’t wait. I don’t like them. I’m scared.

  7:46 a.m. Julián – I’m on my way, just turned around, don’t let them in.

  He didn’t reassure me and that makes me very nervous. I wanted him to say go ahead and let them in, they’re harmless, but he didn’t. He told me not to let them in instead and that says a lot.

  7:47 a.m. Me – I’ve stalled as long as I can. Grayson is sleeping in his room. I’m getting the gun out of the safe.

  7:48 a.m. Julian – Just don’t open the door. I’ll be there soon.

  The bell rings again. I snap my head up from the phone and make sure Grayson is still asleep. I can’t let them keep ringing the doorbell, they’re going to wake the baby and I can’t tend to him and ward off his creepy uncles at the same time.

  I close the door to the nursery and hurry down the stairs to the coat closet. “Coming, just a second,” I call out while I squat down and punch in the combination.

  The gun is lying in the center of the safe between several folders and a stack of money. I didn’t know Julián kept that in here.

  I pick up the gun and feel the weight of it in my hand. It’s intimidating, I hate guns they scare the shit out of me but I’m a mother and it’s my job to protect my baby.