Starved for Love

by Annie Nicholas

  With a shudder, Cooper collapsed.

  I petted his back and rocked him within my limbs.

  He didn’t move.

  “Coop?” I shook him. “Val, did we kill him?” I tried to roll the big shifter off me.

  Val chuckled and helped me settle the unconscious Cooper in his bed. “He’s breathing. He’ll recover in a few hours. Oh to be so young and naïve. Gotta love virgins.”

  “Cooper’s far from being a virgin.”

  “There are different versions though. Cooper’s never fed an incubus until today.” The smug smile was back on Val’s face as he lay back with hands behind his head. “Next time, he won’t be such a hardass about my staying.”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  “I doubt Sin would ever be willing to share me in bed.” I rolled to face Val with Cooper’s warm body to my back.

  The shifter snored.

  “I wouldn’t offer him such pleasure.” Val gathered me into his arms. “You’re so picky about who you share a bed with, and yet, so uninhibited once you’re there.” He traced his hand over my body from shoulder to hip. “What don’t you like to do?”

  I sighed, resting my head against his shoulder, soaking in the cozy moment and never wanting it to end. “Washing dishes. Well, housework in general, but dishes are the worst.”

  He laughed, hugging me tighter. “I meant in bed, but I’ll keep the dishes in mind for future reference.”

  “Oh.” Heat caressed my cheeks. What a question. I leaned on my elbow to see his face better. “Why?”

  “I want to know your limits.”

  Something in my stomach fluttered, maybe lack of food, but I doubted it. “Um…I haven’t found any limits.” I swallowed. “Not that I might not eventually have any.”

  He angled his head to look me in the eye. “Well, well, won’t it be fun to find out what those are?”

  The flutter worsened in a good way and I grew breathless. “Oh, yes.” I’d been introduced to some kink with Sin. A little BDSM, some dominance games and group play, but Val seemed on a different level of intimacy. I’d be an eager student. After today, Cooper might be too.

  I curled my finger around Val’s damp hair. “It seems odd that someone with your tastes and appetite would be alone so much.”

  “No, it’s not. One has to have the right kind of partner for such exploits. And you seem to have the opinion that my wives never visit. They do stay with me and you will have to share. It’s just not on a full-time basis.” He grinned. “And now that I’ve found you, and you want to move in, we can make plans.”

  I blinked. He said it like it was a done deal.

  “Come.” He scooped me off the bed. “Let’s wash up and have a snack.”

  My stomach growled on cue. “I’m starved.” The lunch atmosphere with his wives hadn’t been conducive to eating. I could eat a half a cow or a big, juicy cheeseburger with a chocolate milkshake.

  I puttered behind Val into Cooper’s unexciting bachelor’s bathroom and let him adjust the water temperature. Maybe I was overreacting to what he’d said.

  Val stepped under the shower and gestured for me to join him. I was glad for his assistance. My legs wobbled under the strain of standing.

  He scrubbed me with a clean, soapy facecloth, taking extra care between my thighs.

  Leaning against the cool tile, I closed my eyes and drifted under his care. “You’re so good to me, Val.” Why didn’t I jump on the marriage train and tell him to make the announcement tomorrow night? Then I recalled my parents, the loving four-way relationship they shared. I’d never have that with Val. I’d be the wife all the other ones hated. If I was going to keep my incubus I’d have to fight for him and convince those bitches I was worth loving.

  Val kissed my belly button and left a trail of kisses up between my breasts, along my collarbone and up to behind my ear.

  I took the facecloth and rinsed it well before returning the favor by washing him. “Bend a little so I can reach the back of your neck.” This simple act showed how comfortable I’d grown with him over a matter of days. What would it be like in a few years? A few decades?

  Having someone care about me could become addicting, a dangerous vulnerability, because I’d be giving him the power to break me. This was what my people feared and I finally understood.

  He glanced at me with soft blue eyes, a teasing smile on his lips. I wanted to wrap my limbs around him and never let go.

  That frightened me more than the demon.

  I took a shaky breath as I watched him rinse, fighting with the urge to flee. Instead, I stepped out and wrapped a towel made for large shifter males around my body twice. My stomach reminded me of its state of unrest, and I made a beeline for the kitchen. Food would make me feel better, it always did. My anxiety was due to low blood sugar, not from fear.

  I raided Cooper’s well-stocked fridge. Shifters had to eat a lot. Hunger gave their inner beasts a pathway to take control over their shared bodies. I made turkey sandwiches for all three of us, two for Cooper, and added the last of the bacon in the pan to mine. Tomato, lettuce, and mayo made them deluxe style. I munched on my food and sipped milk while waiting for Val.

  He entered, dressed and immaculate once more. How he managed to keep his clothes from wrinkling must be an incubus trick.

  I offered him the food. “This is the extent of my culinary skills. This and mac n’cheese.”

  He wolfed it down. Maybe I should have made him two as well. “I’m having dinner with my wives tonight. Perhaps you should join us.”

  I choked on my milk. “I think we had enough of each other for one day. Anyway, I’m going to stay and make sure Cooper regains consciousness.”

  With a possessive gaze, he searched my face. “Very well.” His assent was reluctant. “It might be easier to discuss our engagement without your presence. They may feel more comfortable speaking out their true concerns.”

  “Sure.” They didn’t have any trouble verbalizing them this afternoon. “But I haven’t agreed to the engagement yet.” I set my empty glass by the full sink.

  “Pia.”

  “We’ve only known each other a few days. What’s the hurry? Are you on a deadline?”

  “When I want something, I go after it.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

  “I haven’t said no, either. I think we should take our time getting to know one another. Marriage is a big step.”

  “There’s no doubt in my mind that you will make me happy. Am I doing something wrong?”

  I ground my teeth. “Look, you’ve tied the knot at least five times already. If things don’t work out, you can go find another wife to play with. I’d like to marry only once. Forgive me for being careful.” It’s all my heart could take.

  He rested his hands down on the counter top in front of me and leaned across it. “No other incubus will satisfy you like I will. We’re compatible on so many levels.”

  “Do you love me?”

  He jerked back. “What?”

  “L-O-V-E, do you love me?” I thought not. Even though our race held marriage sacred, the concept of love frightened most. I took his hand in mine and offered a reassuring smile. “Val, if I marry you it’ll be because of love. I want what my parents have. You know this.”

  Sweat beaded on his forehead and he wiped it away. “Do you—you—”

  “No, it’s too soon.”

  He screwed up his face as if trying to understand. “I’m offering you everything. You’d have security with me. I’d give you your own expense account. Hell, I’m even willing to let you live with me. That’s more than I’ve given the others.”

  Was it fair that I demanded more than his wives? No, but I didn’t care. I wouldn’t accept anything less.

  He cupped my face in his hands. “I want to an
nounce our engagement tomorrow night at the banquet.”

  My head spun and I pulled away from him. “You’re going too fast and your wives would hate me forever if we just ignored their concerns.”

  A storm cloud of hurt furrowed Val’s eyebrows as he loomed over me. “How can I be so sure and not you? Is it Sin?” He pointed to the bedroom. “Cooper? You went through a lot of trouble to get John back. Are you waiting for your demon lover to return and sweep you away from me?” His voice rose as he spoke until he ended shouting the last question.

  Years of living with older sisters had set a reflexive yell-back trigger in my brain. “Yes, that’s it, Val. I’ve been using you to keep me company until someone better showed up. Not like I had other suitors to turn to.” The neighbors a mile down the road probably heard me.

  “Why wouldn’t I think that? You treat me just like a suitor. For someone who’s supposed to not love them, you sure act like it. How can I tell if I mean anything to you?”

  I gasped. “I treat you differently. You just don’t realize it. We haven’t been together long enough for you to see.” Tears welled up in my eyes. I tried to blink them away but only managed to spill them. “I fed you. Shit, I mainlined you to Cooper.” I swiped my tears from my cheeks.

  Val ran his fingers through his wet hair. “All this time I thought you were being coy. A ploy to catch my attention, and it worked, but you’re serious.” He paced away from me.

  I gaped at his back. “A ploy? To trick you into marrying me?”

  “Sure, a gimmick to intrigue me. It’s a good one. I haven’t met a succubus who could pull it off until you, but you’re not acting. You really want all these things.”

  The things he referred to were love, compassion and respect. “What kind of person…” I stopped because I knew the answer. I was related to two of them. My sisters. Succubi were ruthless. I was an enigma. A social defect. “Your wives all swindled you.”

  “My wives acted in their best interest. Cecile recognized my potential and helped me build my empire. The others wanted what my power could offer.”

  “What do you want, Val?” The lack of warmth as he spoke of his wives chilled my marrow.

  “I need to eat. The more wives I attract, the more energy I have available to me, the more powerful I become.”

  “So, I’m just another food source.” I sat on a chair before I hit the floor. I should have known better than to attribute mortal emotions to immortal creatures descended from demons.

  He crossed the room and knelt in front of me. “I—I don’t know, maybe at first, when you walked into my hotel suite.” A small sad smile graced his face. “But I hate the idea of sharing you and it doesn’t bother me with my other wives.” He took my hand and rubbed his cheek against my palm. “I love the idea of you moving in.”

  Sure he did. I’d be fast food, delivery and take-out all rolled into one. Smooth skin caressed my hand and I wanted to melt into his arm. What was I doing? All I asked was to slow down. Some people took years before being engaged, but those were mortals.

  The succubus market was cutthroat. For every incubus there were ten succubi. Some hunted for husbands and jumped on any good offer. No wonder Val thought I’d leap at announcing an engagement. He probably didn’t hear the word no often.

  “But you’re right. Maybe we should re-examine our mutual goals.” He rose to his feet and brushed his knees off.

  My heart took a dive. “Is this where you say it’s not you it’s me?” Oh my God, I was such a dumbass. I’d actually fallen hard for him and hadn’t known it until now. How would I hide this from my parents? They’d lock me in a tower if I fell apart like after Pierre.

  “I don’t know what that means?” He tilted his head. “I’m just agreeing to give you space. I’m not sure if I can provide what you want and it seems unfair for me to force you into a marriage you weren’t even looking for.” Before exiting the house, he paused at the door. “You will still come to the banquet, right?”

  “Do you want me to?” I swallowed my tears, determined to stay strong.

  “Of course, it would be odd for everyone in your family attend and not you.” He nodded and left me.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Day one of my cycle

  I poured my limbs out of the hot bubble bath. Once upon a time, I would have wanted company, but I couldn’t bear the idea of spending time with any male. Not after what Val did to me yesterday. The asshole dumped me because I expected too much from him.

  He’d known what I wanted since the luncheon my father threw for him and thought I’d been playing him. That was so not cool. I’d opened myself to him against everyone’s advice and now I paid the price. I glanced at my steamed reflection in the mirror. Dark circles hung under my eyes. I had to pull my shit together or my parents would be all over me like peanut butter on jelly.

  After Cooper had regained consciousness and inhaled the sandwiches I’d made him, he drove me home. Like a good friend, he listened to my tirade about incubi and their moral capacities. Before I exited the car he pulled me into a bone-bending hug and offered to beat him up.

  I chuckled at the memory. Cooper had a good heart, but he couldn’t fight worth shit. If I wanted to harm Val, I’d go to Sin. I sat on the edge of my bed wrapped in a towel, heat steaming off my exposed flesh. I wanted Val to hurt as bad as me. Childish, but it was very much the truth.

  He’d led me on. Made me feel cherished, something I hadn’t experienced in ages. What caused the sudden shut down? One minute, let’s announce our engagement to the world, the next see ya around.

  It was that damn word love. As soon as I’d said it he’d freaked. Immortal males weren’t that different from mortal ones.

  Val’s family wasn’t close, not like mine. My mothers loved each other as much as they loved my dad and he always had time for them. I didn’t know enough about Val’s life to make an informed opinion but from what little I’d witnessed, maybe I’d escaped a bad fate?

  I flopped back onto the mattress with plans for a nap, when a zippered clothes bag hanging on my closet door caught the corner of my eye. Dread curled inside my stomach. Where did that come from? Had my mothers bought me a dress for the banquet? I had decided not to go.

  A note was clipped to the front. Groaning, I rolled off my comfy bed, already sorry for moving. I undid the clip and opened the note. Scrawled in clear, masculine script was a message.

  Wear this for me.

  Valerio

  My heart did a silly little dance. Inside, I was still a princess waiting for her Prince Charming, no matter how much reality tried to beat the wish out of me.

  Had he sent this dress before or after the love fiasco? I hadn’t noticed when I entered my bedroom last night but I’d been so inside my thoughts that a parade could have marched through my room unnoticed.

  I stuck my head out the doorway and shouted. “Mom?”

  A distant, “Yes?” answered me. I couldn’t tell which one.

  “When did the dress arrive? The one hanging on my closet door?”

  “Yesterday afternoon,” she yelled back.

  Great, that told me nothing. Nada. Zilch. He could have sent it before or after Cooper’s.

  The last thing I wanted to do was watch Valerio Hunan with his gorgeous, sophisticated wives around him. What if I showed to the banquet and he ignored me? I’d rather pick fleas off Cooper.

  I unzipped the bag and pulled out a red, backless gown. The kind of dress only a man would buy a woman. Holding it in front of me, I gazed at the mirror. I didn’t need to try it on to see that the dress’s fabric would cling to my curves. With the right pair of shoes and the fantastic red lipstick I’d just bought, I’d be sex on heels.

  My bedroom door opened and my birth mother, Sam, stepped in. The act of knocking was a lost art in this household. “Goo
d, you received the present Val sent you. I heard things went horribly at lunch yesterday.”

  “Who told you?” I ran my hand over the smooth material, not wanting to see the disappointment in her eyes.

  “I have my sources.” She hugged me from behind. Even in heels, she still only reached my forehead.

  Leaning into her small frame, I couldn’t lift my gaze yet.

  “It could have been worse,” she whispered

  “How?”

  “They could have not even shown up. Your other mothers did that to me on our first meeting.”

  “No way.” I twisted to face her. Nothing but pride shone in her gaze. I loved my mama.

  “Oh yes they did. But I loved your father and I proved it to them. They came around eventually and your father had faith in us to work it out.” She smoothed my hair from my face. “Do you love Val?”

  “I barely know him.”

  “You must like something about him if you’ve spent the whole afternoon moping in your room.”

  I recalled the dinner we’d shared on our first date. Let me feed you, echoed in my heart. “I think he’d make a good husband.” I wasn’t lying. The truth was a painful shock to my self-confidence. His wives appeared taken care of. He gave them the space they required and the security succubi craved. “If anything, I think they’re bad wives.” They left him alone and—and unloved.

  “Then fight for him.”

  “I don’t have much of an arsenal. They were very good at pointing out that I have nothing to offer in a marriage, Mom.” I shrugged out of her hug and set the dress on the bed. “I can’t go. I’ve embarrassed myself enough for one lifetime. First, Pierre, now Val.”

  “Pia Marie Blyton, there is nothing wrong with who you are. Listen to me when I say, you are perfect.” She swung me around. “Your father, sisters and the three of us are attending this event. So hold your head up high and remember he came after you. Not the other way around.” She squeezed my face between her hands. “Put on that dress and make him beg, baby girl.”