The Golden Land

by Di Morrissey

Natalie gave him a small smile. ‘Yes. Take-away.’

  ‘I’ll see you later, then.’

  ‘I’m sorry about last night, Mark. But I haven’t changed my mind.’

  ‘Nat, I can’t believe we can’t agree on something this important.’

  ‘Me either.’ Natalie walked outside and got in the ute.

  At the hospital, she found Andrew very alert and when he gave her a smile, her spirits lifted.

  ‘I’m sure you mean that, my lovely boy, and it’s not just tummy gas.’ She smiled back at him.

  After she’d fed him and he’d gone to sleep, she went outside the hospital into the sunshine with a bottle of water and rang her mother at the shop.

  ‘That’s wonderful, he’s gaining even more weight,’ exclaimed Sarah. ‘He’ll be home before you know it. What’s the plan then? Is Mark going straight back to work? How long can he be on leave?’

  ‘Mum, I have to tell you, the mine has made a lot of people redundant, and Mark was one of them. He’s out of a job.’

  ‘What?’ exclaimed Sarah. ‘Darling, that’s terrible. Didn’t they know about Andrew? That’s outrageous. Can’t he go back to his old job? He must know every builder on the Gold Coast. Why didn’t you tell me?’

  Natalie hesitated. Why had she delayed telling her mother about Mark when usually her mother was the first person she called in any crisis? ‘I’m not sure,’ she said slowly. ‘Maybe because it’s scary and upsetting, and I didn’t want to worry you.’

  ‘Mark will get another job, darling!’

  ‘He’s been searching, but things aren’t looking good.’

  ‘Nat, how bad is it? I mean, I can’t believe Mark can’t get a job. It won’t be long, I’m sure.’

  ‘I hope so. It’s just that we’re going to have to live on our renovation savings.’

  ‘There’ll be plenty of time for renos, Natalie, don’t worry.’

  ‘Yes. Unless . . . no, forget it.’

  ‘Unless what?’ asked Sarah, sensing something was amiss.

  ‘Mark wants me to sell the kammavaca.’

  ‘For heaven’s sake! It’s not worth that much is it? It won’t keep you going long. I thought you wanted to keep it.’

  ‘I’ve had an offer of forty thousand dollars, which would be a huge help now. Mark wants to sell it because he doesn’t know how long it will be before he sees another pay cheque and I want to return it to Burma. It’s caused a bit of a rift between us.’

  ‘Good grief!’ exclaimed her mother. ‘Forty thousand. To think we nearly threw it out. Who wants to pay that?’

  ‘A dealer in London. He said he had a buyer. But Mum, I’ve already made up my mind that I’m going to send it back to the family it came from in Burma. I’ve already offered it to the person concerned and she’s really pleased, so I can’t go back on my word, can I?’ said Natalie.

  ‘Natalie, are you sure? I mean, no-one would blame you for changing your mind. Seeing you have very different circumstances now,’ added Sarah quickly.

  ‘Mum, I can’t go back on my word! I’ve learned a lot about Burma and I know that this is the right thing to do. I can’t sell something that doesn’t really belong to me. Uncle Andrew was trying to return it to this family when he was killed. He never got to return it to the rightful owner!’

  ‘I see,’ said Sarah quietly. ‘And that’s why you named the baby Andrew.’

  ‘Yes. But Mark and I have had a huge fight over the kammavaca.’

  ‘I’m not surprised and I can see your point of view,’ said Sarah. ‘But surely your family should come before some strangers in Burma? How do you know she won’t sell it once they get it?’

  ‘I don’t know, though I’d be very surprised. But even if she does, it’s her decision,’ said Natalie adamantly.

  Sarah didn’t sound convinced. ‘Nat, are you sure that you’re not just emotionally exhausted by all that you’ve been through? Are you sure that you’re making the right decision? That sort of money would come in awfully handy for you both right now. And how are you going to manage? I just wish I could give you some money, but after Steve’s misadventure with the shares, I’m not in a financial position to help at all. Have you thought about returning to work?’

  ‘Mum, how can I possibly go back to work with a sick, premature baby in hospital? It would be completely impractical. I would have to express my milk every morning, get Mark to drive it up to Brisbane, with the other two in the ute, more than an hour each way, because he couldn’t leave them by themselves. Anyway, even if I was mad enough to try to return to work, I wouldn’t really be able to concentrate knowing that I had abandoned my baby. It’s out of the question.’

  ‘I didn’t mean to upset you, Nat. I was just looking at options.’

  ‘It’s all right, Mum. We’ll manage somehow. As you say, I’m sure Mark will land a job soon.’

  ‘The main thing is little Andrew has pulled through,’ said Sarah. ‘When will you bring him home?’

  ‘I’m not exactly sure. It will be good to have him at home, but it’s going to be a challenge,’ said Natalie. ‘I’m a bit scared about it. He’s still so tiny, and I’ve got two others who aren’t very old either.’

  ‘I know, but there’s a lot of pressure on Mark, too.’

  ‘Me too, Mum! We’re using up our savings so we can’t do the renos and we’re living in chaos. We won’t be able to afford preschool so the kids will be home twenty-four seven with a fragile new baby, and I’ll have a grumpy husband getting depressed and feeling a failure,’ said Natalie.

  ‘And you have a solution but you don’t like it,’ said her mother.

  ‘Mum, it’s a temporary solution. When that money’s gone, what then? You said yourself, Mark could land a job at any moment, we just have to hang in there. I can’t go back on my word, I just can’t.’ Natalie felt close to tears. Surely her mother could understand her wish to do the right thing.

  ‘But what if it takes much longer than you think for Mark to find work? You don’t want to lose that house!’

  ‘I hope it’s not going to come to that, Mum. I’m just going day by day at the moment.’

  ‘Why don’t you take a Sunday off and trade with Mark on the hospital run and come and visit us?’ suggested Sarah, changing the subject. ‘I think you need a bit of space.’

  ‘I’ll think about it,’ answered Natalie.

  Life staggered on at home with uncomfortable silences, neither Natalie nor Mark mentioning the offer from Michaelson. Mark had contacted everyone he knew and complained to Natalie about his bad luck with timing as there seemed to be no openings. He spent a lot of time on the phone chasing up people in the local building industry as well as companies using electrical contractors. As soon as Natalie arrived home, he’d head out the door to drop off a resume, or meet with someone who might know about a job.

  Natalie didn’t say anything but she knew he was becoming increasingly frustrated by his inability to find work. She knew that he felt diminished by his lack of success.

  Three weeks later Andrew was discharged from hospital.

  Natalie and Mark felt a mix of elation and apprehension about caring for their tiny son. He was still barely the weight of a newborn, although he was thriving and gaining weight each week.

  Charlotte was delighted to have her little baby brother home at last and introduced him to some of her favourite toys, promising him that he could play with them whenever he wanted. ‘If you ask nicely,’ she added.

  Adam seemed uninterested initially, but whenever he heard Andrew cry, he would run to a parent to let them know at once that his little brother wanted them. Both Mark and Natalie were surprised by the children’s calm acceptance of this new family member.

  Natalie was told to feed Andrew every three hours and she was relieved when an early childhood nurse came every few days to check on his progress, weight and oxygen levels, and to answer any questions she might have. It was comforting for her to be able to talk to an understanding specialist abou
t her fears, especially her anxiety at night.

  ‘I sleep so lightly, because I’m listening for any little snuffle or breathing problem,’ said Natalie. ‘I feel so responsible for him. Before there were professionals looking after him, so there would always be help on hand if something happened. Now, there’s just me.’

  ‘Your feelings are perfectly normal. But you do need to get your rest. Perhaps you could have a nap in the daytime between feeds and let your husband look after the baby and the other children.’

  ‘Yes, he’s at home right now,’ said Natalie.

  It was tricky to find a time when the house was quiet and Natalie could rest without being disturbed. But Vicki came to the rescue and offered to have Charlotte and Adam at her place in the afternoon after their naps for a couple of days a week, while Mark looked after Andrew and Natalie slept. The children loved playing with Ipoh and sometimes Thomas or Thi stopped by during their visit. Whether Vicki had asked them or whether their good Burmese friends had volunteered to help, Natalie didn’t ask. She was grateful that the children were happy and enjoyed being at Vicki’s, and she could get some welcome sleep.

  The routine and atmosphere in the house changed considerably when Brad arrived unexpectedly at the door.

  ‘Hi, Brad! This is a surprise. What are you doing here?’ asked Natalie. ‘Mark is out for a little while. Does he know you’re coming?’ She ushered him inside, surprised at how pleased she was to see the ever-optimistic and cheerful Brad.

  ‘No, he doesn’t. But no worries, I won’t impose on you. Could I leave my bags here till I get a car organised?’

  ‘You’re not staying with us? That’s a pity. Are you staying in the unit you bought?’

  ‘Nope. It’s rented. I’m going to a motel. You must have your hands full with the new bub. I’m only passing through for a few days. Taking a break, having a swim, anything that’s away from holes in the ground and dust.’

  ‘Would you like a coffee?’

  ‘That’d be great. I’ll just get my stuff.’

  Natalie started to make coffee and then stuck her head outside where the children were playing in the garden.

  ‘Charlotte, Adam! We have a visitor!’

  The children shrieked with delight and flung themselves at Brad as he struggled through the door with two large bags.

  ‘How come you’ve got so much stuff?’ asked Natalie.

  ‘I’ve left the mine.’

  ‘Did they make you redundant, too?’ asked Natalie.

  ‘No way. I got in first and quit.’ He tickled Charlotte, making her squeal, while Adam tried to climb onto his back.

  ‘Why did you do that, if you don’t mind my asking?’

  ‘They were pretty rotten about Mark, I thought. I know that other people were made redundant, but what they did to Mark was wrong, I reckon. Everyone hits a rough patch in life at some stage and I always figure if you give them a hand, be a bit understanding, especially if you’re a boss, then you’ll get it back ten times over. They didn’t do the right thing by Mark,’ he said simply, ‘so I left them.’

  ‘The right thing,’ she echoed. ‘I hope you tell Mark that. It’s really decent of you, Brad, but can you manage now that you have a mortgage?’

  ‘I’m not worried, something will turn up. I’m not married and I haven’t got kids. Things are much tougher for Mark.’ Brad gave a shrug and a grin. ‘Change is as good as a holiday, I reckon.’

  ‘Don’t think Mark agrees. He hasn’t been able to find work here on the coast at all. But it will mean a lot to him that you walked away from the mine because of the way he was treated.’

  ‘Nat, don’t worry. Sparkies will always be in demand but the work goes in cycles. Just have to hang in there.’

  Natalie was tempted to tell Brad just how bad their situation was, but decided she’d let Mark choose what to share with his friend. ‘Would you like to take a peek at our new addition? Andrew’s come home.’

  ‘Lead the way!’ Brad followed Natalie into the bedroom where Andrew was sleeping in a bassinet beside their bed.

  ‘Wow, he’s a little guy. Like a doll,’ whispered Brad, sounding awestruck. ‘Cutie, though.’

  Natalie nodded as they tiptoed out of the bedroom. ‘It’s still a bit scary. We sort of wish that we could have brought all the hospital equipment and staff home with us. We got so used to seeing him all hooked up to machinery in the humidicrib.’

  ‘What do you think of your new little brother, Charlotte?’ Brad asked as she pounced on him.

  ‘He sleeps a lot and he cries like a little mouse.’

  ‘What’ve you been up to? Still dancing?’

  ‘Can we put on a show?’ asked Charlotte excitedly. ‘I will dance the princess,’ she announced as she headed into the lounge room.

  As they were applauding and the princess was taking her bows, Mark came in and did a double take to see Natalie sitting on the lounge and Brad holding Adam.

  ‘You missed my show, Daddy!’

  ‘I’ll catch the second act, honey. Brad, good to see you, mate. What are you doing here? How long are you around?’

  Natalie excused herself, gathering up the children to leave Brad and Mark together to catch up.

  Mark was the most animated he’d been in weeks. Brad’s presence and his stand against Mark’s treatment cheered them both up. But things were still strained as Natalie continued to stand her ground over the sale of the kammavaca, even when Mark told her that he could not see how they could manage the mortgage repayments much longer. If they couldn’t talk the bank into a new arrangement, they could lose the house.

  With Brad there to keep Mark company, Natalie decided to go to yoga classes again to help calm her mind. She felt she needed it, even if only one day a week, and worked out that they could afford it if they tweaked the household budget. Mark and Brad assured her that they would have no trouble looking after the three children. So Natalie fed Andrew and headed off to class.

  The quiet commands of the instructor and the gentle, relaxed breathing of the class during meditation calmed Natalie. She was glad that she’d made the effort to come, and after the class she had a mug of chai with Moss.

  ‘It’s good to see you. I heard that you were on quite a trip with your surprise package,’ said Moss as he passed her the honey.

  ‘You mean Andrew coming early? Yes, it was a big surprise. A big scare, actually, but thank god he’s doing okay. It’s wonderful what they can do for premmie babies these days, so he’ll catch up.’ Natalie declined the honey for her tea and blinked back a tear.

  Moss reached over and put his hand on her arm. ‘That’s one thing about being a Buddhist, you learn to simply accept. One accepts the gifts one is given and, for you, Andrew is a special gift.’

  Natalie nodded. ‘I realise that. I’m trying to accept what each day brings.’

  ‘I’m sure he’s on the road to wellness and you have to let him start his journey,’ said Moss. ‘How are things with you? I expect you haven’t had much time for yourself. What happened with your kammavaca? Do you still have it?’

  ‘Yes. Though it’s caused a bit of controversy in our household,’ she said lightly, trying to make it seem less than the contentious issue it was. ‘We’ve had an insane offer from the London dealer I think I told you about and Mark wants me to sell it.’

  ‘I thought you’d decided not to sell,’ said Moss.

  ‘I still don’t want to. It didn’t matter whether we sold it or not when it was only worth a few thousand. But forty thousand dollars suddenly puts a different light on things, especially for my husband.’

  Moss’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Why did the price rise?’

  ‘I don’t know. Michaelson said he had a serious collector keen to buy it.’

  ‘That is substantial money,’ said Moss. ‘Did he say whether it was a private collector or an institution?’

  Natalie shook her head. ‘No idea. He just said a collector. Anyway, it’s not for sale and I’m not keeping it
either. I saw the scenes of the monks demonstrating in the Saffron Revolution on TV and the army firing on them. I was really shocked, and I wanted to do something for Burma, besides just handing out pamphlets. My friend Mi Mi told me that she knew a granddaughter of King Thibaw. So I wrote to her in Burma and said I’d send the kammavaca back to her.’

  ‘That is a big decision and one I admire. I imagine the recipient was pleased, too.’

  ‘She was, very much so. It seems the family had been told by King Thibaw to keep the kammavaca safe always. But, well, things happen, times change,’ said Natalie.

  ‘Are you questioning your decision now?’

  ‘Not at all,’ said Natalie firmly.

  ‘Then that’s your answer,’ said Moss. ‘Did this dealer tell you anything about the kammavaca?’

  ‘No. A dealer in Brisbane suggested that Michaelson could get it translated for me, but I never followed that up. I was told that the writing was probably sacred texts.’

  ‘Whatever is written in the manuscript, it is probably the object itself that would appeal to a dealer. Its age, condition and, especially in this instance, its provenance. There’s certainly a fascinating story attached to this piece.’

  ‘Yes, Princess Aye Aye has confirmed that Tipi Si was cheated.’

  ‘Yes, Ferguson had a reputation for shady dealings.’

  Natalie reacted with surprise. ‘Ferguson, the art dealer? How do you know about him? Was he famous?’

  ‘You told me about him when you first explained the story. So I thought I’d see what I could find out about him.’

  ‘I’d forgotten I’d told you.’

  Moss smiled. ‘Hardly surprising after all you’ve been through. Well, I did a little research. Ferguson is variously described as a colourful chap or an interesting fellow. I think we would call him a bit of a self-promoter. Your uncle did a feature on him in the Illustrated London News.’

  ‘Yes,’ said Natalie. ‘I found that article, too.’

  ‘It seems that Ferguson became a bit of legend with all of his grand gestures of donations to museums and so forth, although not every deal panned out for him. Just the same, he must have made a very tidy sum for himself, because he acquired a Victorian pile in the Scottish highlands.’