Bonds of Blood [Lords of the Expanse] (Siren Publishing Classic)

by Honor James

  He saw the first changes as they chased ghosts behind her eyes that stared so trustingly up at him. “I know,” he whispered softly, continuing to stroke her hair to help ground her. “Whatever happens, don’t fight it. Just let yourself relax as much as possible. If it gets to be too much, let me know.” If he had to, he could use one of the dark gifts and put her under, but only as a last resort. Her body would purge first. Everything it had as a human would leave in a rush. That he’d have to watch for because he’d need to get her to the bathing room quickly to deal with everything, but for now she needed to just survive the first of many changes.

  “Talk to me?” she requested quietly. “Hearing your voice soothes me.” More than he knew. When she looked up again at him, she had clouds in her eyes only a moment before saying, “I’m going to be sick.” She felt her stomach rolling, felt ill in a way she never had before and wanted to throw up but really didn’t want to do it there on their bed, in his arms. “Bathroom, I need the bathroom now.”

  Shifting, he had her up in his arms and in the bathing room moments later, helping her to a position that would allow her to expel all the food in her stomach. Andries’s arms held her gently as he held back her hair. “Let it all come up, Xandra. Unfortunately it’s part of the process. I’ll get you in the sonic shower in a while, but for now just remember to breathe.”

  She continued to heave and finally slumped against him with tears streaming down her face. “And we just had that wonderful meal, too.” Which didn’t taste quite as lovely coming back up, not by a long shot. “Don’t think I have more left.” She was feeling strangely numb, as if her whole body had been submersed in ice water.

  Looking at her, he nodded and gently lifted her into his arms once more and stepped into the sonic shower. Setting it to run for five minutes, he cradled her to him as it hummed softly, doing its job.

  She was dropping off closer and closer to sleep. It seemed nothing wanted to move on her body as she lay there limp in his arms.

  Stepping out of the shower minutes later, Andries carried her back to the bed and lay her down gently. Stepping away, he undressed, drew the shades, and slid into the bed with her. Carefully he pulled her close. “I’m sorry, Xandra,” he murmured quietly as he stroked her back. “I know this is not something you would have chosen of your own free will, and I do hate that it’s been forced on you because of your father.” Again that man was trying to cause her pain, but now it was all the more personal because she was his, and no one hurt what was his without dying a long and painful way.

  “How do you know I wouldn’t have chosen this?” she asked in the darkness of the room. “Andries, I love you. I want to be with you for as long as I can, and I had resigned myself to that being only a hundred years, or whatever time was left of my lifespan.” She yawned and moved closer as if she was moving through lead. “Again my father thought he was hurting me, but he just brought me closer to you.” That was the last thing she said before the sleep of his people, her people, overtook her.

  Waiting a moment, Andries listened to her breathing and let out a breath of his own, his filled with relief. “I love you, too, Xandra,” he whispered softly to the silent room and the woman asleep in his arms.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Three days later

  Sitting at her side in their quarters on his ship, Andries looked down at her again, as he had been doing every few minutes. When they’d had to come on board, he’d been concerned about moving her, but he’d had no choice in the matter. She seemed to not have suffered any from it, but he really would not know until she woke…if she woke. Sighing, he rubbed at his face in exhaustion. Since she’d begun the turn he’d slept only a few minutes, ever afraid she’d slip away if he wasn’t watching.

  Her eyes fluttered open slowly, the heaviness of them giving her a hard time simply opening them. Her hand moved slowly and reached for him. “Hello, Andries,” she whispered huskily as she looked into the eyes of the man she loved. “You look so tired, my love.”

  His heart nearly stopped at her soft and slightly rough-sounding voice. Dropping the data pad he’d been attempting to do work on, he turned, leaning over her. “You’re awake,” he breathed out, closing his eyes and giving thanks to the gods he’d never before had any use for. Opening his eyes he looked into hers. “How do you feel?” he asked softly.

  “Like I’m in lead,” she gave him and closed her eyes again, the effort just too much. “It’s as if I’m fighting my body to wake up.” Turning her head, she forced her eyes on him again. “Why don’t you curl up here beside me, hold me, and let both of us sleep for a little while longer? You look like you need it, Andries.” She was worried for him. She didn’t wake worried for herself, just him. “Did you catch the woman who did this?” was her next very quiet question.

  “Yes,” he told her as he shifted to lie at her side, gently holding her closer. “She is being held until judgment, which means when we return you can face her. You will need to decide what you wish to say. It may or may not sway the Alliance’s judgment over her.” Stroking back her hair, he pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I was worried about you, Xandra. It is not a feeling I like, so let’s not have any repeats, if you please.” He wasn’t joking, either. He did not like to worry, especially about his wife. Closing his eyes as he rubbed his lips over her skin and breathed her in, he sighed softly. “It is day on our world. It’s why your body feels so heavy. Because you were just turned, you will be subject to the daylight, even when we are not there, for a great many years.”

  “Okay, then let’s sleep, okay?” She didn’t know what she wanted to say to the assassin that had tried to kill her, and frankly she didn’t want to think on it either. “I love you, Andries. This is perfect, with you holding me, so please don’t let go?”

  “I do not intend to, wife,” he told her softly, pulling her closer to him. “Close your eyes, Xandra. Your body is still in transition and you require a lot of rest now. When you wake, you will likely need to feed.” He’d given her more of his blood while she’d been asleep the last few days, her gag reflex automatically making her swallow and take it in.

  Scrunching her nose, she shook her head. “Not sure if that will be happy times or not.” But her eyes closed and her body molded closer to him. “Thank you for saving me, Andries, for giving us a forever kind of life.”

  “You are welcome, Xandra,” he murmured softly. “I have found that I like having you around and would not be nearly as pleased if you were not in my life.” Likely the closest he’d ever get to admitting his feelings for her. Or rather, while she was conscious to hear him say anything.

  “That’s a very sweet admission on your part,” she whispered only moments before her body took away her ability to remain awake and fell into the slumber of their people.

  * * * *

  When she woke next, she felt decent. Not rock and roll and cartwheels good, but she felt decent. Her body ached and burned, but she felt good. “Andries? Andries, are you here?”

  Walking in from the outer room, he nodded. “I’m here,” he said. He’d been feeding, knowing that, for her first time, something more intimate would likely be best. Moving to her, he sat at her side and caught her when she weaved slightly. “You’ve not fed properly yet, Xandra. You shouldn’t be trying to move just yet.”

  “Right, that would have been nice to know before I decided to jump up and move.” She moved closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder, her hand on his thigh. “I had thought you were gone,” she whispered sadly. “I hate that I felt that way, but I thought that you had left me.”

  “I would not do that, Xandra,” he said in gentle reprimand, kissing the top of her head lightly as he wrapped his arms around her. “I promised I would not and I did not, but I needed to feed and I thought it best to do so in the other room.” Rubbing her back with a light hand, he shifted so he could brush his lips over her cheek. “How are you feeling?”

  “I feel”—she struggled to find the words to
describe it to him—“I don’t feel as if I can run a marathon right now, but I feel good.” And she did. “My shoulder still aches like crazy. I can still feel the hole even if it was sealed, but other than that I am good.” She rubbed her cheek over his shoulder and then nuzzled against his neck. “And I feel hungry. How odd is that.” She also felt amorous. “I feel more though.” Her hand stroked over his chest and stomach. “I feel needy.”

  He was, too, but one of them needed to keep their head on this and, unfortunately, it was him. Pressing a hand to hers before she went further, he waited for her to look up at him. “You’re Vampire now, Xandra. Primarily our species is sensual and enthralling. You will need to learn a whole new set of rules that govern our people alone, as well as the guidelines we have to keep the non-Vampires of our world safe.” Shifting slightly, he laid her down, following her and kissing her gently.

  She wasn’t going to complain about this instruction. Her arms wrapped tightly around him even as her thighs parted to allow him an area in which to lie, and as she kissed, her legs found their way around his waist. When they parted, her eyes were fully dilated and her body was in overdrive that nearly had her coming off the bed. “I need you, Andries.” And in the end, he was all she had ever needed. “Later I will worry about rules. For now I just want and need you.”

  As he slid a hand down her arm gently, she shivered, all her new senses awakening. Leaning in, he nipped at her chin lightly. “What do you want, Xandra?” he asked softly. “Tell me, wife, exactly what you want from me,” he murmured, brushing the flats of his incisors over her throat.

  She shuddered and felt her mouth go dry. “You, Andries. I want and I need you.” She groaned and ran her leg up and down his thighs. “I want to feel you inside of me, making me yours. I want to feel your fangs buried deep into my throat.” She shuddered and moaned this time. “Teach me, Andries, teach me to make you feel these things for me.”

  Shifting, he pushed his cock into her hard and fast as he struck with his teeth, sliding them through her flesh. Driving into her pussy over and over again, he growled softly, his hands moving over her body with a need he never let loose. But now, with her as one of his kind, he could finally let out the beast inside, if only a little.

  She moved with him, her pussy accepting the brutal thrusts of his cock and giving him leave for more as she wrapped her arms and legs around him. She could still feel his restraint and scraped her nails along his back, demanding that he didn’t hold back and even saying, “I’m as you are now, Andries, harder. Give in to the beast you leash for me.”

  Pulling his teeth from her throat, he slid his tongue over her flesh and watched how quickly the twin holes closed. Not nearly as fast as they would once she fed and regained her strength, but much faster than before. Turning his head, he kissed her hard. “If I do, then you won’t be able to feed, wife. That will be for later,” he promised on a breath.

  “I don’t need to feed,” she grumbled and arched up from the bed slightly. “I need you.” Her heels dug into his butt, pulling him in deeper and harder with each thrust of his cock. “I need you to let go, and moon and stars, I need to feel the beast in you claiming me as much as you have claimed me.”

  Slipping a hand free from her, he used a nail to scrape the skin over his jugular, knowing once she caught the scent her body and instinct would take over. Sliding his hand back under her shoulders, he buried his face in her neck so the faint scent of blood would hit her nostrils. “Are you sure you don’t want to feed, wife?” he whispered softly against her skin.

  She could smell the blood, could taste it almost, and felt her own fangs slide down and out even as she moaned loudly. “I don’t know how,” she somehow managed to say around the teeth that were much larger now. “Andries.” She moved and wrapped her legs tightly around him and shuddered at her sudden release even as she cried out his name once more.

  “Don’t think, Xandra,” he murmured as he fought his own orgasm, pushing into her harder and faster. “Let your instincts guide you. They are older than time,” he said against her ear. Nipping at her lobe gently, he licked along the shell of her ear. “Feed, Xandra, please,” he whispered softly.

  And she did. She moved her lips over his neck and it was as if they found the sweet spot without any real guidance from her. Faster than lightning striking, she buried her fangs deep into his neck and gasped as the power hit her. The emotion. The raw animal desire. Her hands clutched his shoulders as she screamed inside her own mind and greedily drank of him as she spasmed on him.

  As soon as she bit, he came hard, his body taut as a bow as he shuddered. The feeling of her feeding was intense. He’d never once felt anything like it before and knew that he’d never feel it again, except with his wife. Panting as he relaxed slightly, he cupped her head to him as he rolled so she was on top and stroked her hair gently.

  She finally pulled back from him and licked the wounds even as they sealed. Moving to him, she kissed him as she moved and then clamped onto him as her orgasm finally rolled through her body. She pulled back and threw her head back and screamed as she gave in to her orgasm.

  Replete and full, she collapsed onto his chest, gasping for air and closing her eyes. “I love you, Andries, but I think I do need more sleep,” she whispered only moments before her eyes floated closed once more.

  Smiling faintly, he held her to him. “I think you do, too,” he murmured with a touch of humor as she breathed slowly in sleep. Stroking her back gently, he lay just holding her as she slept, and then, after a time, he fell asleep with his arms wrapped tightly around her.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “What do you mean that I shouldn’t eat a lot of solid food for a little while, Andries? And just how long is a ‘little while’ in terms that I can understand?” She wasn’t hungry, but craved the taste of food more than needed it.

  “About a month,” he told her, which would be the whole of their trip. “Little snacks are all right. Beverages are great, especially water. It will help your body adjust to the foods you do eat. Stay away from sweets and heavy foods, no cheese for about two months,” he told her and knew that would be tough considering that one of her favorites was cheese.

  “But my favorite so far is a cheese.” Her complaint sounded in the air. A long sigh escaped her lips followed by a nod. “All right, I will be good,” she grumbled and looked to the time on the wall. “You need to go though, Andries. You have a ship to command.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek. “Go. I will be fine with whoever you assign to watch over me. I want to walk around and get a feel for the life onboard.” There was a pause followed by, “Do they know that I am no longer what I was when we married?”

  Nodding, he pulled her to him for a better kiss, his lips sliding over hers slowly, his tongue tasting her for a long, long time. Lifting his head, he licked his lips and looked to where her hands gripped his jacket. “They know you are one of us now,” he told her softly. “Liandun will be your guide. He is the pale-haired one outside the door. Wherever you wish to go he will take you. Just remember, wife, do not ignore your cravings.” He’d told her about the blood craving earlier and the signs to watch for and the results of ignoring them.

  “I won’t,” she whispered softly and touched his cheek again, leaning in and kissing him again. “I will never get enough of you, Andries. We can outlive our sun and it will still not be long enough for me to tire of your kisses, your touches.” She did pull back and touched her fingers to his cheek. “I love you, husband. Now go. Your wife needs to get dressed so that she can go to medical and have a once-over.”

  “You will let me know how it goes?” he asked, though his words sounded more like a demand. He was concerned about her, had been since the turn had been completed, and likely would for years to come. But having her checked over by a professional would ease his mind a little.

  “Yes, my love, I will let you know. I will ask the medical staff to send you a com message so that it comes up the right chain of command,
all right?” She smiled. “I’m trying to do the right things here, Andries. Is that right, to ask them to send the message to you?”

  Growling softly at her, he sighed. “You could just tell me yourself, wife,” he pointed out. “That is also allowed, but if you would feel better having them tell me you have grown a tail, then I will look forward to their cold and clinical report.”

  She laughed and shook her head. “Nope, I get to tell you the fun stuff like tails.” She loved the way that he now teased her, and she saw it as just that, teasing. “Now, off with you. I will call you later and tell you what’s going on. Deal?”

  “Deal,” he said and stole one more kiss from her. Heading to the door, he paused just before he set off the sensor and looked to her. With a hint of a smile, he let his eyes move over her. “Xandra,” he said quietly to get her attention and knew she was going to hurt him for doing this and then running. “I love you, wife,” he said and then moved just enough to trigger the door.

  When the door slid closed behind him, she simply looked at it and then screamed. “Andries!” She was going to kill him. There were no two ways about it. She heard his laughter outside and shook her head. “Silly man,” she grumbled but went about the room until there was the knock. Opening the door, she saw Liandun there and smiled up at him. “Hello, I’m ready to head to medical, if you don’t mind, Liandun.” She wasn’t inviting him in, not when she was ready to leave anyway. “Forgive me for not inviting you in, but I found that I would rather be out, walking.”

  The man was stoically silent as they walked, so Xan stopped trying to engage him and instead asked the doctors endless questions as they ran their tests. When an information pad was pressed into the ranking medical officer’s hand, she frowned at his look. “Is something wrong?” She hadn’t done something right was her fear. “Something showed up on the tests, didn’t it?” She pressed a hand over her throat. “How bad is it?”