by Eva Luxe
Marilyn offers a relaxed half-wave to me. “Amelia, nice to meet you. I overheard a bit of your conversation so I see that Brent has already filled you in on our history together. So, wedding-type flowers, huh? For the wedding that’s not happening.”
“Hey, you wanted to keep your deposit.” Brent shoots back, grinning.
“No, I told you I was keeping it no matter what. I have mouths to feed, you know.”
“It’s not my fault Chester eats half his weight in kibble every day.”
“Yeah, well, I should really just let him eat you instead. You’re so muscular and gamey.”
“You’re wounding me here.” Brent claps a hand to his chest, feigning pain. Marilyn grins. She doesn’t look sorry.
“Seriously though - you sure about this? Kelly’s pretty pissed, you know. She even called me to try and get me to not let you buy today.”
Brent suddenly looks uncomfortable. “The whole Kelly thing is under control. Trust me.”
Marilyn doesn’t push it. “Okay, well, long as you’re sure. I’ve got some actual customers over on the other side of the greenhouse, so can you two handle yourselves for a bit while I take care of them?”
Brent waves her off, the grin returning to his face.
“You have interesting friends.” I smirk at him. He smirks back.
“You don’t know the half of it.”
Without thinking, I answer, “Maybe I’d like to.” Brent looks surprised for a second, and I feel a momentary twinge, a concern that I’ve somehow gone too far. But then the smile returns to his face.
“Why don’t we start with flowers and go from there,” he says.
“Deal.” I nod, and we begin to walk down the row together. I figure that’s the end of it. Until I feel his fingers brush my palm, and he takes my hand with a gentle squeeze. I squeeze back.
Chapter 31 – Brent
The garden’s beautiful today. As Amelia and I stroll along the rows, stopping occasionally to touch blossoms and comment on the vibrant colors that Marilyn has managed to conjure here in the middle of the concrete city, I catch myself feeling something. It takes me a second, and then I realize, it’s happiness.
It’s not that I don’t feel happy generally that means this is a surprise - more accurately, it’s just that I feel happy with Amelia. This whole thing was just a one-time goof, and now here we are a week later, holding hands in a garden and picking out flowers.
Amelia keeps sneaking glances at her phone in between plants. That doesn’t bother me - but the disappointed look that flits across her face every time she puts her phone away does, somehow.
“Hey, Amelia? Is something wrong?”
She looks at me, almost as if she’s surprised I’m asking. “What?”
“Not that it matters, because I know this whole wedding vendor thing is ridiculous and boring, but you keep staring at your phone like you’re waiting for Godot to show up.”
“Oh! It’s silly, I’m sorry. It’s just…my friend Rosa and I had a fight the other day, and I never feel good when we’re upset with each other. We’ve been friends for so long that something just feels off when we’re not okay. That must sound really silly to you.”
“Nah, I get it. If my friend Nikki’s ever upset with me, I can’t sleep at night. Although that’s mostly because I’m afraid she’s coming to murder me in my sleep, so.”
She laughs, genuinely, and says, “Then you know what it’s like to have a good friend.”
“Yes,” I agree, glad there’s no hint of jealousy in her voice, like there always was in Kelly’s. “And also a sworn enemy if I ever ignore her.”
She laughs again. I pause, then push ahead. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Amelia stops, running her fingers over a batch of blooming lady slippers. “I don’t know. I mean, Rosa’s always been, like, my wild side. She’s completely spontaneous and brags about not wanting to have responsibility. And the other day, she told me that she and her partner are thinking about fostering a kid.”
“I take it your reaction wasn’t what she wanted?”
“It’s not like I was horrible, you know? I was just…surprised! Rosa always talked about kids like they were the ultimate surrender, you know? Like once you had one of them, you could never go back. I guess I just never pictured her as someone who would want that. And now she’s so upset with me, and it just feels awful. She’s even the one who convinced me I should go looking for a guy that night at the club, so really, she’s half the reason we’re here right now, and I can’t even tell her how happy that’s made me.”
“How happy that’s made me.” She’s happy. Happy with us. I revel silently in that information for a moment, and then set it aside with a deep breath. There are more important things to say right now.
“You know, this was the one place that my ex let me choose when we were planning our wedding. Everything else had to be her decision, because she’d been thinking about it since she was a little kid, right? She was so sure about everything. Not that I had a problem with that, most of the time - it’s just the way it goes. But teamwork, friendship, relationships, all that…they go both ways. They have to. All I’m saying is, it sounds like you matter just as much to Rosa as she does to you. And that’s a good thing.”
“And you know what it’s like not to feel that way.”
I offer a wan chuckle. “I’m standing here with you, and no ring on my finger. Truth’s kinda self-evident. Which I guess is a hint that maybe taking anything I say seriously enough to apply it could be a mistake.”
Amelia leans in close, wrapping her arms around me. “I don’t think it’s a mistake at all.”
Chapter 32 – Amelia
It’s not like I didn’t know most of what Brent told me in the garden. Intellectually, at least. But there’s a huge difference between knowing something logically, and reconciling it with your emotions. When it came to that, having Brent around to offer advice and an understanding ear made a huge difference.
“What’re you going to do with all these flowers?” I tease, leaning against him as we stand at the edge of the rooftop, looking out over the city.
“Haven’t really thought about it.” Brent muses. “Maybe I’ll just have them all delivered to my friend Nikki’s place. She hates flowers, so she’d destroy me, but it’d almost be worth it…”
“I actually like flowers, you know.”
“Okay, then. It’s settled. I’ll send the first eighty to her, and save one for you.”
“You’re a jerk.” But I’m laughing, and playfully shove at his chest.
“Hey, it’s getting late. You want to grab some dinner?”
“Together?” The word slips out.
“Nah, I figured we’d each sit at different restaurants on the East Side and text each other about the meal. Yes, together.”
I feel an unexpected tightness in my chest. Tours, cakes, and flowers were one thing…but a meal? That feels different.
Why not? Truth is, there’s no good reason to say no to him, and about a dozen reasons to say yes. But then, suddenly, Jason’s voice is in my head. “You’re seriously going to eat another one of those? Good luck fitting into that dress I bought you—”
And in that moment, I find myself getting angry. Not at Brent, but at myself, at Jason. Why is his stupid voice still in my head anyway? I hadn’t wanted to listen to him in the first place, and when I did, nothing good came out of it.
He’d belittled me, hurt me…and dropped me as soon as it was convenient. And now, here he was, trying to ruin a perfectly great day for me when he wasn’t even around anymore. What a prick.
I take a deep breath. Suddenly, with just the realization of how much I’d let Jason hurt me, and how determined I was to not do that anymore – as well as the realization that with Brent, everything was so much better and different – I feel like a new me. I decide to do what I truly want and not let anything – or any memories of a certain someone I’m determined to banish from my mind for goo
d – hold me back.
“Um, yeah. Sure. I’d like that.”
Chapter 33 – Brent
In the instant that Amelia hesitates, I worry that maybe I’ve misread this whole thing. Maybe she’s not that happy with “us” after all. It’s not like she can’t be happy on her own. But then she says: “I’d like that,” quietly but strongly, and I’m immediately back into good spirits.
It surprises me a little bit how much of an effect this woman is suddenly having on me. We’re only just getting to know each other, and yet the anticipation of waiting to hear her say whether she wants to grab dinner or not is enough to send my heart rate through the roof.
“Okay, great. We don’t even have to be fancy. You like hot dogs?”
“Hot dogs, huh? I was sort of expecting the Rainbow Room, the way things have been going.” I almost panic again, but then I see the sly smile curling the corner of Amelia’s lips. She’s fucking with me.
“Very funny. I don’t know about you, but the last time I got within ten feet of the Rainbow Room, the hostess threw a broom at me. My ‘artiste’ look apparently didn’t go over in that establishment as well as my Wall Street look. Seriously though, I know the best hot dog stand in the city.”
“Best in the city? I don’t think I believe that.”
“You will! Come on.”
We head towards the elevator, and I wave goodbye to Marilyn on the way out. She flashes the peace sign as the elevator doors close behind us.
Down on the street, I guide Amelia through the crowded streets, enjoying the tight grip that she keeps on my hand, so we won’t get separated. Our destination is only a few blocks away, and we get there without any trouble.
“I found this place by accident,” I tell her as we stand in front of the cart. It’s emblazoned with flames and bikini-clad figures, and resembles nothing so much as a panel van from the 80s. The owner, Grover, also looks like a leftover hippie biker, but he cooks like Gordon Ramsay (minus most of the screaming).
“That sounds like there’s a fun story there.” Amelia elbows me teasingly. Then, to Grover, “I’ll take two with everything, thanks.”
“Same for me. And unfortunately, it’s less a story and more a—”
“More a moment of intoxicated good fortune.” Grover chimes in from behind his beard as he slaps four dogs onto the grill. “The first time he came here, this dude was so high that he thought my cart was a unicorn pooping out hot dogs. And he still ate five of them.”
“In my defense, unicorn hot dogs sound amazing even when you’re sober.”
“Whatever you say, man.” Grover passes us our food and goes back to the tattered paperback he’s reading.
“Here, let’s sit.” I point to a set of steps leading to a nearby apartment complex. “I don’t know what it is about this place, but nobody ever seems to come in and out of it, so this is a perfect place for a meal.”
“Maybe it’s haunted.” Amelia offers, sitting beside me and looking up at the building. She bites into her hot dog, and glee spreads across her face. “Okay, you were right, these are amazing.”
“I warned you. Best spot in the city. Now you’ll never be able to go to another hot dog stand because they just won’t be good enough. It’s a curse, really.”
“A delicious curse. I’m okay with that.” Amelia takes another big bite. After a pause, she speaks up again. “Hey, can I ask you something?”
In the middle of my own bite, I chew and nod yes at the same time. Swallow, and “Sure. What’s up?”
“Okay. Will you…tell me more about Kelly?” My face must have fallen, because she adds “I’m sorry, it’s just, hearing Marilyn mention her being upset about all this earlier…it was weird.”
Okay. Deep breath. I remind myself. You can handle this.
“Okay. So, as you know by now, but I guess I’ll start kind of at the beginning, Kelly was my fiancée. We met a few years ago, hit it off really well, and about nine months ago, I proposed. But the closer we got to the wedding, the more things cropped up that we - that she - couldn’t deal with. Mostly, that little fact that she hated my change of direction in life. It sucked, but I’m really glad we ended it. It was the right thing to do.”
I try not to think too hard about the pieces that I’m leaving out of that story - especially the part about the prenup. But that? That’s something I don’t even want to think about myself, let alone explain to this woman eating hot dogs with me while I’m pretty sure I’m falling for her. Some things are better left alone, I insist to myself.
Amelia doesn’t press it too hard, and I’m thankful for that. All she asks is, “Is she really that upset?”
I blow out a long breath. “No.” I lie. “And even if she was, it wouldn’t matter. None of this: the cake, the flowers, none of it, belongs to her. She might have picked them out, but it wasn’t her name on any of the checks. Besides, I’m really enjoying doing all of this with you. All the fun, none of the mess.” That part, at least, is very true.
“Right. I get it. There are plenty of things that my old fiancé - that Jason - sort of took possession of when we were together, you know what I mean? Sometimes he’d even insist on picking out the clothes I wore to be sure they complimented whatever tie he wanted to wear that day. And then half the time he’d change his mind by the time we got to the office.”
“Wait, so you two work together?” I ask, surprise making me blurt the question out.
“Um, yes. We do. But I hardly see him anymore, especially now that he’s got his new squeeze under his thumb. Barely even bothers to look down his nose at me anymore.”
“Sounds like a real stand-up guy.” I swallow the last of my hot dog.
“That’s one way to put it. There are lots of other ways, but you can’t say any of them on TV. Also, was that a little jealousy I heard in your voice when I said he was still around?”
I bite my lip, a little ashamed that it snuck out so obviously. “Maybe a little.”
Amelia sets aside her empty food wrappers and rests a hand on my leg.
“Good. I like it. Means you feel something.”
I look at her and smile. “I sure do.”
“But don’t worry,” she says, squeezing my leg a bit. “He’s got nothing on you.”
Now I can’t stop smiling even when I try. I’m making my feelings for Amelia really obvious, and I don’t even fucking care.
Chapter 34 – Amelia
It’s almost midnight. But as I stand in front of the apartment door, raising my hand to knock, I keep replaying Brent’s words in my head. “You matter as much to her as she does to you.” I knock on the door.
There’s no answer. I knock again. Still no answer, but I hear shuffling and the indistinct sounds of Rosa’s voice as she curses and mutters her way to the door. As the locks click, I hear her call, “I swear to god, Morris, if you - ” She stops when she sees me on the other side of the door.
“Who’s Morris?” I ask, offering a small smile.
Rosa’s expression is stony. “It’s midnight. What’re you doing here?”
“I came to talk. And you’re always up until 1 AM anyway, night owl. Did you think I forgot about law school?”
Rosa’s posture relaxes, and she swings the door open a bit wider. “And?”
“Look.” My eyes drop to the floor. “I just…I came to apologize.”
“For showing up at my apartment at this absurd hour?”
“About the basketball game.”
“You mean how you cheated to get those last two points?”
I almost laugh. “No. About - about what I said.”
Rosa steps back, out of the doorway. “That’s a start.”
I step past her into the apartment - there’s a reading lamp on in the corner, next to her favorite comfy armchair that we dragged up here together after someone abandoned it on the sidewalk. There are stacks of books and case files on pretty much every available surface, plus cups of coffee on top of half a dozen of those.
&nbs
p; I perch on the arm of the couch. “Listen. I owe you a huge apology. Coming to me with something so huge, so amazing, and having me react the way I did - I’m not surprised you took off, you know? I just…you surprised me. A lot. And in a good way, now that I’ve had a second to process it!”
Rosa regards me with a look that would have felled a lesser person. But I’m her best friend, so I avoid it by staring at the floorboards. “And I know it’s only been a couple of days, but I miss you! I even went to brunch to try to see you. I want to know everything about this new kid thing, and I have a bunch of new stuff to tell you too! Please talk to me.”
“You’re a jerk.” Rosa says. “But I’m glad you went to brunch for me. I know how that’s more your thing than mine.”
I laugh. She’s right.
“I’m sorry I accidentally stood you up,” she continues. “I just didn’t realize you were going to go. We hadn’t exactly been on speaking terms. But it appears you went to great lengths to try to see me— brunch lengths— so, thanks.”
“You’re welcome. And let’s change that,” I tell her. “The ‘not on speaking terms’ part, I mean. Because I’m here to talk.”
She nods, and smiles. “I know this makes me sound like I’m twelve years old, but I’m really excited about this. And it made me feel really weird that…I didn’t like the idea of not having you in my corner, is all.”
“Rosa! Sweetie, I’m always going to be in your corner.” I’m up off the couch now, standing in front of her. “I just - I didn’t know all of this was going on and it took me by surprise! But I’m here now…so tell me?”
Chapter 35 – Amelia
Two hours later, we’re whiskey-drunk and laughing. Rosa had very seriously explained to me why she felt ready to foster a child, and I’m slowly coming around to the idea. But we’ve moved on in our conversation, to talking about the crazy things that have been going on between Brent and me.
“No, I’m telling you, it was this amazing garden up on the roof of a skyscraper!” I say, peering at Rosa over the arm of the couch, which is now cleared of assorted coffee cup and folder detritus.
