Raising the Phoenix

by Emma Nichols

  “What’s all this?” My eyes widened.

  “Sit down and I’ll show you.” Quinn pushed my chair in and then elegantly draped a linen napkin onto my lap.

  I shook my head. “I don’t even know what to think.”

  He leaned low and murmured in my ear. “No thinking. Only eating. And then approving the plans so I can get the builders to work on your new house.”

  “Mm, I like the sound of that.” I lifted my fork, but only managed to hover over the food. “Are these crepes?” My stomach, which had been churning earlier, was now grumbling for a meal.

  “Of course. Nothing but the best for you, Savvy.” Quinn eyed me, and I could feel my cheeks flushing in response.

  “Thank you.” I couldn’t even look at him. When he was near, I suddenly had needs and wants I’d never experienced before.

  We made short work of the food, since we were mostly silent. As he cleared our plates, Quinn touched my ponytail. “You look adorable.”

  “It’s practical.” I shrugged.

  He nodded. “Right. Given your plans for the day, it makes sense.” His shoulders heaved. “Can I help?”

  I stood abruptly. “I’m fine. I’m just buying an RV and cleaning out the house.”

  His hand grazed mine and I shivered at the contact. “I hope you know that having help doesn’t make you weak.”

  Whipping around, I glared at him. “It sure as hell doesn’t make me strong. There are a lot of guys just waiting for me to fail. If I can’t accomplish this on my own, how the hell can I be trusted to lead the pa—to care for the people on the homestead?”

  Quinn gnawed on his cheek and then shrugged. “Fine. We’ll do it your way, but I’m warning you, I’ll never be far away.”

  I sighed. “I know. You’re what…a few miles?” I hugged him briefly. “Thank you. For everything. Now show me. I gotta get to the homestead.”

  “You’re going to eat and run again, aren’t you?” His lids lowered and I could feel his disappointment.

  Slowly, sadly, I walked into his arms. “I don’t know what you want, or what you expect, but I promise you…I’m nothing like what you’re used to.” I frowned.

  Lifting his chin, Quinn finally met my gaze. “And how do I stack up to what you’re used to?”

  I snorted and quickly covered my mouth. “Sorry. I’m not used to anyone.”

  His eyes narrowed. “What does that mean?”

  Immediately my cheeks were on fire. “Let’s look at the plans.” I turned and clapped my hands, hoping to change the direction of our discussion.

  “Are you trying to tell me you’ve never been with anyone?” His brow furrowed.

  Part of me really wanted to ignore his question, but the rest knew I had to be honest. Then he’d know I really wasn’t his type. “Yeah. That’s what I’m saying. Plans, please?” I scanned the room for the iPad he’d shown me the night before.

  Quinn groaned. “I’m trying to process this. Give me a minute.”

  “I don’t have a minute.” I rubbed my temples. My head had begun to pound, probably from the blood shooting to it every ten seconds. “I promised I’d wait,” I whispered by explanation. “It was really important to my father. He told me it would matter to my—husband. Not once have I regretted the decision.” My eyes teared up as I stared into his gorgeous blue ones. “Until now.” I sniffled and swiped at my nose. “I hope you’re happy.”

  Instead of running, like I expected, Quinn crushed me to is chest. “Your father was right,” he murmured into my hair.

  12

  After leaving Quinn’s house, I drove straight to the nearest Asheville RV dealership, which meant going to Hendersonville. My heart wasn’t in it. I didn’t feel any excitement even though I should’ve been thrilled to return to our homestead. Instead, I was consumed with the unexplainable sense of loss. By the time I met up with a salesman, I was ready to buy the first tow-behind I found.

  “What’s your price range?” The guy smiled at me in way that made me mildly uncomfortable.

  “I don’t have a limit. Let’s find one that meets my needs, then find me someone to deliver today, and I’ll buy it.” I sighed.

  He tugged on his chin. “So, do you want to get the credit application going and we can look after we get the results.”

  Only sheer restraint kept me from growling at this man. “No,” I gritted out. “I will pay for it. I’ll get a cashier’s check as soon as you give me the total. Got it?”

  His eyes widened briefly, but he quickly recovered. “Well, then let’s get searching.”

  By the time I’d seen three different models, I was completely over this chore. I didn’t even bother trying to hide my frustration anymore. “Find me one with bunks and a comfortable living area in the back, a bedroom for me, a nice functional kitchen, an outdoor kitchen, and a bathroom I can turn around in. I’ll take it.”

  The man scanned the list of models on the lot. “I think I have just the one for you.” He quickly steered me to one on the far side of the lot. “Now, it’s a little pricey.”

  “I don’t care.” I tightened my ponytail and followed him.

  He unlocked the door. “Take a look and let me know what you think.”

  I walked into the open living space, which consisted of a couch, a U-shaped booth, and a kitchen with an island. To the right was my bedroom with a queen-sized bed. The TV was on a swiveling panel, so it could be watched in the bedroom, if I was so inclined. I walked through the kitchen and found a small, but functional pantry. The bathroom was on the left with a standup shower and door to the outside. The entire back was a bunk house, which could sleep three, plus an entertainment center where the twins could have their own television. When I walked out the door, I found the outdoor kitchen.

  “Fine.” I shrugged. “This will work.”

  The salesman was practically rubbing his hands together as we returned to the office to complete the paperwork. Meanwhile, I trudged behind him lost in thought, until my phone began to vibrate. I grabbed it from inside my satchel and grinned when I saw Quinn’s name appear on my screen. “Hey.” For some reason, I sounded breathless.

  “Don’t do it,” he warned. “I have a better idea.”

  “Don’t do what?” I covered my other ear with my hand. The background noise drowned him out. The mountains didn’t help either.

  “You don’t strike me as a camper.” Quinn chuckled.

  I hesitated before responding. “I’m not.”

  “So, if you buy an RV, you’re wasting money,” he explained.

  I paced just inside the showroom. “I know, but I don’t have any alternatives. We have to move back to the homestead.”

  “Savvy,” he murmured.

  I could almost feel him caressing me through the phone. Closing my eyes, I leaned against the wall. “Yes, Quinn?”

  “I have an idea. It’s a better idea. It’s a practical idea.” His excitement was obvious.

  With a groan, I asked, “What’s the idea?”

  “Tiny house.”

  “What?” I croaked. In my mind, I pictured a living space so tight, the twins and I were practically on top of each other. Nothing relaxing about that. I shook my head.

  “I know what you’re thinking. It’s nothing like that. I’m texting you an address. Come meet me,” Quinn urged. “Then, if you still want an RV, I’ll help you negotiate a deal.”

  My temper flared. “So, you think I can’t do it?” I stormed out of the showroom and made a beeline for my car. “I can do this. I was already about to do it. What makes you think I need your help?”

  He swallowed hard. “Maybe I don’t think you need me,” he admitted quietly. “Maybe I just want you to need me some. Would that be so terrible?” He sighed. “I sent you the address. See you soon.”

  Then he ended the call and I felt like an ass. Why did I always think the worst of him? Why was I so determined to exert my independence? Why couldn’t I let anyone help me? His text chimed and I loaded the address
into the map and started on my way. While I drove, I considered all these questions paining me. The truth was difficult to accept. My father had made me this way. He didn’t want me to ever need a male. I could still hear his voice in my head. This is how you’ll know the love is real.

  Apparently, if I didn’t need a guy, but I still wanted to be with him, we were on a level playing field. I wouldn’t be some sucker. I’d be the strong, fierce woman my father trained me to be. I’d be the Alpha, completely untouchable. I’d prepared for this role for ten years, never really expecting I’d actually have to step up. My parents were supposed to still be here. My chest tightened. My wolf whined. Then, thankfully, I arrived at the destination. The last thing I needed was more alone time to think.

  Quinn had been watching for me. As soon as I parked, he opened my door and offered me a hand. My brow rose. “You do know I can get out all by myself, right?”

  He chuckled. “Of course, but as a gentleman, I should open doors for you. I should make you feel safe and cared for.”

  My brow furrowed. “And why would you do that?”

  Leaning close, he whispered, “Haven’t you figured it out yet?”

  “Figured what out?” I giggled because everything about this seemed so silly.

  He wrapped his arms around me and drew me close to his chest. “I like you, Savvy. I could more than like you.”

  My breath caught in my throat. Why couldn’t he be a shifter? Why did life have to be so complicated? “But you can’t. I told you. Last night, even.”

  “I know. No rush.” Quinn smiled down at me. His whole face seemed to light up and those eyes pierced my soul. Seriously, my wolf was about to lose her mind.

  I rubbed my temple. He didn’t get it. This wasn’t one of those things time could fix. This was an impossible situation. “Show me,” I murmured.

  He bent his head and grazed my forehead with his lips as he continued to kiss a path to mine. By the time he reached his destination, I was ready…more than ready. I was ravenous. Hell, I almost forgot. I pulled back and placed my hand over his mouth. Shaking my head, I tried to clear the fog in my brain that blotted out everything but him. “No, Quinn. Show me the tiny house.”

  If he was disappointed, he hid it behind a mirthful mask. “Of course. This way.” He gently took my hand in his and pulled me into a huge warehouse. Inside, were several homes in various stages of completion. Then he stopped and pointed. “That one.”

  My jaw dropped as I stared at the tiny Craftsman with a porch. I was in love. “I’ll take it.”

  He laughed. “You haven’t even looked inside yet.”

  “I don’t care. It’s beautiful. And it even fits in with the homestead.” My heart raced. I wanted to believe this was because of this amazing find, but I feared my reaction had more to do with the man standing behind me with his arms casually wrapped around my waist. “This is the one,” I murmured. Inside, my wolf howled and I tried to convince myself I was still talking about the house.

  13

  Once the deal had been made, I drove back to the homestead. I still had to unload the house. Some would go in the dumpster I’d ordered. Some would go in my car to be transported to the storage unit. A truly tiny pile would soon be moved into our temporary home. Thinking about it made me smile. This was right. Oh, and there were few things I’d enjoyed more than watching Quinn negotiate my purchase. By the time he was done, I had free blinds for the place in addition to free delivery and set up.

  I tossed the ottoman in the dumpster. Most of the furniture was ruined either by water or smoke damage. For last few hours, I’d been trekking back and forth. Determination to finish had me lost in my own thoughts. Quinn had called, but I couldn’t reach the phone in time. Standing on the porch, I prepared to return his phone call when I heard the sound of a vehicle on gravel. The house had been set up. The homesteaders had gone back to the Phoenix House to pack. Suddenly, I found myself all alone. I stood at the ready, prepared to shift in an instant if necessary. The vehicle came to a stop at the end of the driveway. I recognized it as a taxi, but still I felt uneasy. We didn’t have visitors here.

  Movement to my left caught my eye, I whipped around and saw Howl racing toward me. Relief swept over me. Together, we faced whoever was about to emerge from the cab. The door opened, the cab driver stepped out to open the door for his passenger and then the trunk to remove luggage. Finally, we saw a woman emerge. My entire body sighed. “Aunt Jo?” I jumped off the porch and rushed to greet her. As I neared, her arms opened to me, but the smile at seeing me still couldn’t hide the pain she felt at the loss of her sister. I took a deep breath. “I know,” I murmured as we hugged.

  “Tell me everything. I’m here to help.” She studied me while smoothing my stray hairs. Then Aunt Jo glanced at Howl. Her brow arched. “You should know, I don’t plan on leaving until everything is settled.”

  I laughed. “Will you be staying with us, auntie?”

  Studying the homestead, she shook her head. “I don’t do well with packs.” She glanced down at Howl. “Not everyone is cut out for pack life.”

  “Oh.” I didn’t know how to respond to her remark. “So that would make you a…”

  “Rogue. I’m a rogue, dear.” She sighed. “And you should be happy I am.” She rifled through her purse and pulled out a bottle of her famous spray. “If I hadn’t gone rogue, this never would’ve been. You can’t imagine the lives that have been saved because of it.” Aunt Jo smiled proudly.

  “I’m sensing there’s a story, maybe some family history I’m currently unaware of?” Then I gestured for her to follow me to the porch after I carried her bags to my vehicle. “We’ll figure out where you’re staying soon enough. I need a moment to rest after the back-breaking labor. Shall we sit and talk a bit?”

  With a slight nod, Aunt Jo hesitantly sat beside me on the top porch step. “I suppose I need to check in with whomever is running things now, just so I don’t look like a threat.”

  I bit my cheek and shrugged. “You already did.”

  Her eyes widened. “Savvy! You?”

  “Yes.” I grinned. “Won it.”

  “Who challenged you? You need to make sure this can’t be contested.” Aunt Jo shook her head while smiling. “I never thought I’d see a female Alpha in my lifetime.” She swiped at her eyes. “I’m so proud of you. You give me hope. Maybe in this new age a woman truly can be anything and have it all.” She glanced at Howl. “Maybe if it had been this way when I was your age, I wouldn’t have gone rogue.”

  “Father trained me for this, when it was obvious he wouldn’t have a son.” My head hung as I recalled the night everything changed.

  “Your father was a good man. He was a forward thinker. That’s why the Phoenix Pack has prospered.” She sighed. “Before they left, we were all part of the Golden Pack, originally from Colorado. I joined your parents here when they started your pack. I found my mate.”

  “Wait. You found your mate?” I frowned. “Then how are you a rogue?”

  She glanced at Howl. This time he leaned more heavily against my legs. “I denied him. I didn’t want the future he offered. I couldn’t be less than I am, could never be satisfied as the simple housewife to a successful doctor.” Aunt Jo stared into my eyes. “So, I left, moved to California, studied at Berkeley, and finally created the special perfume—and cologne—which has preserved many a pack.” Her smile seemed sadder now.

  “I thought you couldn’t leave your mate. I thought it would be so painful many wolves chose to die with their mate.” I shook my head. Right now, it felt like all my beliefs were crumbling.

  Aunt Jo reached out and laid a hand on my thigh. “We knew we were meant for each other. My wolf recognized him, but I couldn’t go through with it. I left.” She shrugged.

  “What happened to him? Did he die?” My eyes widened as I tried to process all this information.

  “No, but he has mostly lived a half-life, I believe. This is what happens when you decide to love the o
ne you’re with, rather than mate with your true love.” Howl whimpered. Aunt Jo stared down at him. “He refused to take a wolf mate. Instead, he found a dog shifter, and they had a son, I heard. There are problems in the pack. Their leader is greedy, driven, and essentially completely corrupt.”

  The dog lay on my feet. He seemed almost sad. I laid a hand on his head. “It’s okay, Howl.” I could feel my wolf growing agitated. “Something you said…about your wolf recognizing its mate. How’s that work exactly?”

  Our discussion was interrupted as Lenoir and Shelby pulled up. They jumped out of the minivan and rushed to hug the aunt none of us had seen since we were little. Aunt Jo patted the wood. “Come sit. You’re old enough to hear this too.” She waited until they had settled in before continuing. “Savvy asked about your wolf recognizing its mate.”

  They both leaned in, but Shelby was the one who spoke. “Ooooh! Tell me.” Her cheeks grew pink. “I think I found my mate.”

  “How lovely for you!” Aunt Jo gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Did your wolf grow agitated? Or even better, did your wolf howl?”

  Shelby’s head tilted. “There was some definite pacing in there.” She sighed. “He wasn’t looking at me. He was too busy paying attention to Savvy.” She jabbed me in the side.

  “Ow. And I thought you said he seemed to like you too?” I frowned.

  “Well, he looked at me curiously. I thought maybe he felt something.” Shelby bit her lip.

  “Nobody ever sees us with Savvy around.” Lenoir huffed. Then she stared at Aunt Jo with teary eyes. “I found my mate too. When I look at him, my wolf dances and whines. She only settles down when I’m near him. I can’t handle it, so I give in.” Her head hung. “That’s why I come off as pathetic. It’s better than the alternative.”

  “I’m so sorry, Lennie.” My heart hurt for her. Then Howl seemed to sense my sadness, and he began to lick at my fingers. I held his face in my hands. “Thank you,” I murmured as I ran my hand through his fur.

  Aunt Jo’s brow peaked. “Want some advice, Lenoir?”