Wishes to Burn

by Ellabee Andrews

  Fifi doesn’t wait to see if we’ll argue, and Satine closes her eyes with a growl and mumbled curse under her breath, so I grab her hand to get her to look at me.

  “You know, if we’re quick, I think I can show you a few of things I just picked up. I bet we can even do it before Fifi comes back to threaten us with acne,” I say, not having to fake the breathy quality to my voice. I’m dying to know what Fifi traveled all this way to tell us, but it can wait until after I take care of the beautiful woman at my side.

  Satine doesn’t seem as convinced, and just gives me a quick kiss before standing, leaving me with the taste of myself on my lips. “No, Rhia, I’ll not rush things with you. When it happens, it will be on our own time. I can wait until then. I’m going to steal Fifi’s idea though and jump in a cold shower. Don’t start without me, okay?”

  Feeling guilty about having gotten off, but leaving her wanting, I barely nod, and she comes back over and lifts my chin to meet her eyes. “Hey, none of that. I may not have gotten off, but I enjoyed everything I just did to you. Being able to touch, to taste you like that, was amazing. We’ll have our time. Until then, go ahead and get dressed. Whatever it is that Fifi has to say must be important for her to leave her boy toy behind and travel to the country.”

  Feeling slightly better after she says that, I smile before standing and giving her one last deep kiss, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her flush against my body. She lets me hold her like that for a second but then pulls away with a sheepish smile. "On second thought, you all may want to go ahead and start. I think it's going to take more than just that shower," she admits, and before I can request that she come back, lay down, and let me take care of her, she's out the door.

  After I finish getting dressed, I head down the hall toward the living room, the carpet muffling the sound of my steps. Following the murmur of voices, I can’t help the laugh that escapes me when I enter the living room where the others are.

  The guys are all sitting around on the couches, a forgotten game of cards lying on the table between them and staring at our guest. They’re all so handsome, even dressed in just their jeans and t-shirts, but I only have eyes for Fifi.

  As the legendary fairy godmother, there are lots of stories about her benevolence, generosity, and beauty. And they're all true. While Satine may have a sex appeal that no one can rival, Fifi is absolutely stunning with her pink wig, immaculately applied makeup, and a figure that any pin-up model would envy. All of this is made even more impressive considering that underneath her jewel-encrusted denim mini skirt and plaid button up shirt that she has knotted at her waist, she has quite the secret. A penis.

  I’d been stunned when I first met her at her Hollywood home. I wasn’t sheltered growing up, and I watched tv, but I had never met a drag queen in real life. With her brightly painted house and garden benches carved to appear like men in various positions of intercourse, I had been worried about what she could actually teach me. I have never been so wrong about a person in my entire life, and each day I found myself looking up to her as not only a mentor, but a friend.

  In the short weeks I had spent with her in her home, she had taught me about how I could use my magic for others. She did this with small deeds like producing a suit for a man who was nervous about a job interview. Or, gifting a pair of shoes to a woman that didn't have enough to buy any for her child. She never stuck around for their thanks. She would give them these gifts, and then leave while they were too stunned to speak. She also made me see what you can accomplish without magic. That sometimes, being an ear to listen, or a shoulder to cry on is its own sort of magic. Because those are gifts that money can't buy.

  It's Fifi that notices I've joined them first, and she stands from her spot on the couch before making her way over to me in silver cowboy boots. They have a small mechanical click as she walks, the sides having actual spurs on them that look like they too have seen a hot-glue gun and glitter.

  “Hey, sugar,” she says, before leaning in to air kiss my cheeks. “We’ve got lots of catching up to do,” she adds with a conspiratorial wink before pulling back. Her hands immediately go to her wig, ghosting across it as she ensures that no hair is out of place, and I roll my eyes.

  “Whatever do you mean?” I ask, playing coy, but she only places a hand on her exaggeratedly round hip as she looks me over.

  With her brows raised, she examines me, not in a sexual way, but as if she sees something that I don’t, and I clear my throat to bring her attention back up to my face.

  “What do I mean, indeed. Shall we get started then?” Fifi asks, face suspiciously blank, but I haven’t forgotten the look from before. She’s hiding something.

  When no one opposes, she clears her throat and begins to pace back and forth, the spurs on her cowboy boots clicking as she makes her second pass before us, until finally, she turns and eyes us all. “When you all exchanged energy the second time, you created a link between yourselves that is deeper than any you could have forged otherwise. You have to believe me that, if I’d known, I would have never instructed you on what to do…” Her words trail off and she looks so dejected, that I stand and walk over to her and take her hand in mine.

  Staring straight into her face, I allow her to see that I’m not upset with her. “Fifi, what you did was help us save Declan. And, I for one, could never be mad about that. No matter what repercussions there may be.”

  “Yea, I have to agree. This face is too pretty to die so soon. I haven’t even gotten to hold the king’s scepter and wave it at people to show off how important I am yet. I mean, I could have gone my whole life without knowing Gavril has dimples, but you know,” Declan says with a shrug, echoing my sentiments. Losing him would have been a hard blow to recover from. So any price we have to pay now is worth it.

  Still, even though none of us grab the torch and pitchforks to condemn her, she remains silent. Face distant.

  Satine chooses that moment to walk in, hair in a bun on the top of her head, and wearing a t-shirt with yoga pants. Eyeing Fifi’s uncharacteristic state, she claims a seat on the couch, and after one last pat to Fifi’s hand, I join her and claim the space between her and Maksim.

  Silence reigns as the seconds turn into minutes, and I can feel the frustration from the others through the bond she speaks of. Growing impatient, I’m ready to nudge her along, but Maksim beats me to it, his baritone voice causing me to jump from the suddenness of it. “Just say what you came here to say, Fifi. Stop dicking around.”

  I can see the moment his words register to Gavril and Declan, both of them clamping their lips together, but refrain from commenting about his ‘dicking’ around comment. It also seems to be the boost Fifi needs, as she appears to gather herself. She turns her gaze back on us and tries to smile, but it doesn’t erase the small creases at the corner of her eyes.

  “Sorry about that, loves. Like I was saying, I’ve done some digging and found out that, while not altogether unheard of, what you did is extremely rare. As in, the only other cases have always been between two people, and never before more than that. You, my dears, happen to be the first group, and as such, will have to figure most of this out through your own trials and errors.”

  Suddenly more concerned about what we've done, I open my mouth to question her further but have to close it again and swallow a few times. Ready to try again, I say "What is it called, Fifi? This link? Is it permanent, and why do you look so worried?"

  Drawing into herself, almost like she’s taken a physical blow, she closes her eyes one last time before standing a bit straighter. “What you’ve done is create a soul link. It’s very permanent, and it’s a connection so deep, that if one of you die... you all will.”

  With that news, Fifi sinks into the large chair beside her, as if all the energy has just suddenly left her, and leaves us all stunned into silence.

  Well, fuck me, I think. And because my shields are gone, completely blown apart from Fifi’s news, I hear four echoing agreements slide
through my mind.

  After our talk, I excuse myself and walk out the front door, needing some air. I walk around aimlessly for a moment before I find a large tree to sit beneath. After I wriggle around for a second to find a comfortable spot, I finally give up and let my head drop back onto the hard bark of the tree.

  I thought I had accepted having the others in my head, hearing my thoughts, and even witnessing my life like it was them going through it themselves, but the fear I feel clawing up my throat says otherwise. I’m not happy about any of these things, but I’ve been dealing with them because Declan is safe. Now, however, things have changed.

  It isn’t that I regret the choice to save his life, it’s that I hate knowing that I’ve bound the four to me. Because that’s what’s happened. It is me that can hear them. It is my eyes they can see through, and it’s my soul that is tethered to theirs. Knowing that I’m responsible for that is a tough pill to swallow. Especially when I think about the proverbial bomb Fifi just dropped.

  A soul bond went beyond a few mind tricks. It bound us so tightly together that death for one of us meant death for us all. That is the part that has me feeling like I've swallowed a brick.

  “Those must be some hard thoughts, sugar, but if you keep frowning that hard, you’ll get wrinkles.”

  I give a weak smile at Fifi’s attempt at humor, but I can tell by her strained voice that she’s not even feeling it, and we fall into a thick silence. As we sit there quietly, each of us lost in our own thoughts, I find that I can’t hold back the question that scares me the most, despite how selfish it might make me sound. “What if they hate me? Maybe not now, but in the future. What if they grow tired of having to constantly block out my thoughts, and it eventually causes them to hate me?”

  At the tremble in my voice, Fifi leans in close and pulls me into a hug, revealing that her lean arms are also very strong. “Sugar, those four could never hate you. And not only because of the soul bond either. Just look at that porch. You see any resentment there? Because I sure as hell don’t.”

  At Fifi's prompting, I turn to see what she's talking about and find all four of them standing on the porch, watching me. When they realize they've been caught, they quickly look anywhere but at me. Well, all but Maksim. He makes no attempt to hide his staring and the sight of them all chips away at some of the icy dread that has taken up residence inside of me.

  “Thanks, Fifi. I guess I should...,” I trail off, waving my hand in their direction, and she gives me a sweet, understanding smile.

  "Go talk to your harem, girl," she says and lifts a brow in challenge at the word she uses.

  “What? That’s not… I mean, they’re not… We’re…” sighing, I give up trying to explain. “It’s complicated,” I say instead, and she snorts at my weak explanation.

  "Sugar, I think the only one making it complicated, is you. Sure, there may be some kinks to work out," she winks at the way she phrases that part, "but, nothing worth having is easy. Take it from me, if you know what you want, you should go after it. Don't waste time trying to be something you're not."

  With a last pointed look in my direction, she sashays away, magically pulling her magic wand from her ‘cleavage’ and spinning around as she makes wilting flowers around her bloom.

  I just shake my head as she walks away, and begin to walk toward the four that stand on the porch. The ones that have somehow twisted me up like a pretzel, figuratively, and… well, literally as well.

  Feeling my face heat, I try to slow my walk as thoughts of some of my alone moments with them play through my mind, but when I see the smiles on their faces, well, all but Maksim’s face, I forget that I’m not blocking them out.

  This is going to take some getting used to.

  As they nod their heads, I know that they agree. But it warms my heart to know that they’re not going to run away, and that if I have to face this with anyone, I’m glad it’s these four that have found their way into my life.

  As I arrive at the porch, the confidence I found from Fifi’s pep talk begins to fade. Even with the others only pushing out calm and accepting thoughts, I start to walk slower. I climb the steps like my feet are glued to the old wood, but for some reason, I can’t bring myself to step onto the very last one. It’s silly, but I feel like if I do, I’ll be diving into our situation head first, despite already being in the deep end.

  Seeing me hesitate to move further, Gavril steps forward and offers a hand in my direction, and the action feels like more. Like if I take his hand and join the others on the porch, I’m accepting our situation and allowing them to face it with me.

  The insecure side of me, the tiny part that sometimes wonders how I got so lucky to have found them all, starts to push to the surface, but when I look between the faces of my friends, I know that it’s already too late.

  And since none of them seem to be panicking, it seems they know it too.

  Taking a deep breath, I place my hand into Gavril’s strong one, and with no more second guessing myself, I step up and over that last step into the waiting arms of the ones that hold my heart.

  Who Wears Short Shorts?

  The talk I need to have with the others gets set aside when Declan suggests a game of Monopoly, and because he seems so confident that he’ll win, none of us can back down from the challenge. Forty-five minutes later, however, I discover why he’s so sure of himself. He literally has not rolled a bad round yet.

  “That’s it, you little green shit. You’re either cheating or have a lucky horseshoe shoved up your ass. Either way, I’m done.” Gavril tosses down the last of his colorful cash when he lands on Declan’s property, and since it has multiple hotels on it, it leaves him with nothing.

  I’d offer him some of mine, but I’ve already taken a loan from the bank and am hanging on by the few purple properties that I have left. It’s not much, but it’s better than Gavril, and even Satine, who is hoarding her only two railroads like they’re gold.

  “Don’t be a sore loser, Gav. It doesn't suit you. If you need to borrow some money, all you have to do is ask,” Declan says, throwing a wink Gavril’s way before looking over Satine’s small stash in glee. “You too, Satine. I’m nothing if not generous. And since we’re all friends, I’ll only charge you both an extra twenty percent! What do you say?” he asks, and in reply, Satine picks up one of the extra game pieces, a tiny house, and throws it right at him, hitting him directly in the forehead.

  “There’s your interest, asshole. Why don’t you put that with the horseshoe,” she jokes, and I can’t help but smile at them all going back and forth.

  While they argue, Maksim takes his turn, and with the next best group of properties, including the other two train stations, he rolls and lands on community chest, winning a beauty pageant.

  “Enjoy it while it lasts, big guy. You’re coming up on my boardwalk, and beautiful or not, that money is going to be joining everyone else’s in my pile,” Declan says, but Maksim doesn't rise to his goading.

  “Now, now, children. Let’s all play nice. If not, the royal banker is going to repossess all of your property,” Fifi says from her place at the head of the table where she sits with the ‘bank’ money all set out in neat piles. She’s even added a tiara to her wig and some fake bars of gold to the table to make it more authentic. At least, I think they’re fake. I’m not really sure what Fifi’s magical limits are.

  “For the last time, Fifi, you’re not the royal banker. You’re just the banker. Why do you want to be royal anyways? Believe me, it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be,” Declan says, his voice growing dark, and a glance at the others show that they’ve noticed it too.

  "That, my dear, is easy to answer. So let me put it to you like this. Not everyone can be royal. And the title doesn't always come from a person's pedigree. You see, I'm a queen, despite what your definition of the word may be. But not everyone can boast that title. If they did, there'd be no one to clap when I walked by. And that, my loves, would be the true trav
esty," Fifi says dramatically, and we all laugh. Declan joins us, his smile washing away the earlier darkness, and I mouth the words ‘thank you' to Fifi across the table.

  She barely tilts her head, but it's enough of an acknowledgment to tell me she said that on purpose to get the conversation back on a happier note.

  Glad that everyone seems to be enjoying themselves, I’m ready to take my turn. I need a solid roll to get me to GO and to collect my two-hundred dollars, but the telephone ringing interrupts my shaking of the dice.

  “You all keep playing. I’ll grab the phone,” Fifi says, rising from her spot before any of us can say otherwise.

  Leaving her to it, since the only people I care to talk to right now are in the room, I finally release the die, but can’t help the curse that leaves my mouth when they come to a stop with five dots sitting upright. Reluctantly, I move my piece the ten spaces, lips pursed, at where I stop. Declan smiles broadly at me when I land on Boardwalk, reaching out his long hand toward me as I begin to count out the rent I owe for landing on his property.

  I’m still counting out ones when Fifi arrives back into the living room, and I grow suspicious at the look of glee in her eyes. “What are you up too, Fifi?” Maksim asks, taking the words from my mouth. I don’t know if it’s because he feels the same, or if my thoughts ghosted through his mind, but the question is out there.

  Feigning mock pain, Fifi places her hand over her heart. "Oh, you wound me, you mega-sized hunk. I can't believe you'd think I'm up to something."

  The others stare at her with flat looks, and I'm sure my face is a match to theirs, but this only causes Fifi to grin bigger, before sitting back in her seat. "Well, it's nothing big anyway. I just got off the phone with a nice girl, Hershey kiss or bubble gum? Something like that. Anyways, she says that there's a festival going on in town this evening, and we're invited. We're gonna have ourselves a hoedown, y'all!"