Jokers Wild: Stripped Bare

by Lena Matthews

  “What, I don’t get a little sexy dance?” she inquired teasingly.

  “Only if you’re willing to return the favor,” he said, beginning to stand up.

  “No, that’s okay, then,” Missy stopped him before he got all the way up. She didn’t want to dance a little dance if she had to get naked. The thought of her body parts wiggling around wasn’t appealing, so she might as well shut up.

  Shuffling the cards, she asked casually, “So, were you going to call me if I didn’t show up?”

  “Eventually.”

  She snorted. “What’s that mean?”

  “That means once I was through pouting, I would have tracked you down and we would have hashed this out. You probably would have gotten mad and then we would make up and have hot sweaty sex, after you declared that I was right and I am the lord and master of all I survey.”

  “So you admit you were pouting?” Dealing the cards, Missy refused to acknowledge the rest of the shit coming out of his mouth. If it helped him sleep better at night to think that’s how it would have happened, who was she to shatter his illusions?

  “Is that the only thing you took from that?” Brody picked up his cards.

  “I have selective hearing.”

  “What woman doesn’t?” he snorted.

  “How many do you want?”

  “Give me two,” he put down his two unwanted cards.

  Missy’s hand looked dismal at best. She didn’t even have an ace, so she could ask for four; instead she settled for keeping the two of spades and hoping for something in the same suit, or matching. Dealing herself the three cards, Missy groaned when she saw that all she had was a measly pair of fours.

  “What do you have?” she asked, holding her hand close to her face. The real crappy thing about this game, she thought dispiritedly, was that there was no bluffing when it came to the cards in your hand. Either you had the better hand or you didn’t, and she knew from the smug smile on his face that he had the better hand.

  “A flush, what about you?”

  “Nothing worth mentioning,” she threw her hand down disgustedly. “Do shoes count as one item?”

  “No, I was only wearing a shirt, jeans and underwear, so you get three things too.”

  “You didn’t say that at the beginning.”

  “I’m saying it now. Shoes and socks don’t count, and your bra and panties count as one.

  “That’s not fair.” Missy wanted to whine, but she knew that she should have set the rules at the beginning of the game. She was playing against the man who taught her, what the hell had she been thinking?

  “This is poker, it’s not about fair. It’s about how you play the game,” Brody remarked, smiling as if he didn’t have a care in the world, but he was the one sitting while she got naked, so maybe he didn’t.

  “It’s only about how you play the game when you’re winning,” Missy said in frustration. Toeing the heel of her shoe, she slid it off and then did the same to the other foot. When her shoes were off, Missy took a deep breath and pulled her shirt over her head. It’s not a big deal, she repeated to herself over and over again. He’s seen more of me than this, even if my fat is poking out of the side of my bra.

  Sucking in her stomach, Missy tapped her fingers nervously on the table, impatient for Brody to deal the next hand. Waiting for him to shuffle, Missy looked up and noticed that he wasn’t even shuffling the cards.

  Brody stalled until she met his eyes before winking slowly and saying, “Those are the best pair I’ve seen all night.”

  Flushing, Missy groused, “Just deal the cards.”

  Missy had checked out books at the library and surfed the Internet looking for hints and suggestions to become a better poker player, and no matter how hard she studied, it still came down to the luck of the draw, and that completely sucked. She wanted to win so badly she could taste it, but with only two beating items left, she wasn’t so sure of her chances. Maybe if he could bluff or fold, she might have stood a better chance of walking away from the table with her clothes fully intact, but at this rate, Brody only had to have two more good hands and she was screwed, both figuratively and literally.

  “Your wish is my command,” Brody teased, dealing out the next hand.

  This hand was a lot better than her second one had been. She was already showing two pair, that alone was pretty good; if she lucked out and got a joker or either another five or another queen, she would be in seventh heaven.

  “I’ll take one,” she said confidently.

  “Ohhh, only one, huh,” Brody handed her new card and said, “I think I’ll take two.”

  The card was neither a five, queen nor a joker, but Missy still felt solid with the hand she held. “I’ve got two pairs.”

  Laying his hand down in front of him, Brody said, “And I’ve got three of a kind.”

  “You’re cheating,” she accused, looking down at his cards and back at his smirking face.

  “Those are harsh accusations. There are penalties for accusing the house,” he warned.

  “Yeah, like what?” Missy didn’t really think he had cheated, but anything to buy time seemed like a good idea.

  “Like you must apologize on your knees with my cock in your mouth.”

  “Seems like it would be kind of hard for you to hear me if my mouth is full.”

  “I can read lips.”

  “Read this,” she fumed, mouthing ‘fuck you’.

  Brody roared with laughter and sat back in his chair, crossing his hands together on his flat abs. Missy looked down at the cards again, trying to gather the courage to stand up and drop her pants.

  “What type of bulbs do you have in these lights?”

  “Sixty, eighty, I’m not sure. Why?”

  “Just seems awfully bright in here to me.” Missy thought about her options, she could either stand up and drop her pants as quickly as possible and hope that he was blinded by her pale skin, or she could stay seated and perform a contortionist act and try to remove her pants without getting out of her chair. The only real problem was if she tried it that way, all of her fat would jiggle on top or worse, she’d fall out of the chair, landing in an undignified position that Brody would take as a mating call.

  Fuck it, she thought as she stood up and unbuttoned her pants. Looking at Brody, who was staring intently at her, she took a deep breath and dropped her pants, at the exact moment that Bryce walked in the room with a six-pack under his arms.

  “Fuck,” she said, grabbing at her pants and falling forward in the process.

  “You and your timing.” Brody laughed, getting out of his chair. Bending forward, he pulled Missy up, still struggling with her pants.

  “I’m beginning to think it’s impeccable,” Bryce was snaking his head around, trying to get a glimpse of Missy.”

  “Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.” Missy chanted over and over again. This was worse than the time Bryce caught her giving Brody head. At least then she had been covered.

  “I’m assuming that this is a private game, although I’m willing to take off my shirt so I can catch up with you two.” Bryce teased.

  “Don’t take this the wrong way little brother, but get out.”

  “Leaving,” he did an about face. Pausing at the door, Bryce said over his shoulder. “Love the panties.”

  Missy groaned again and buried her face in Brody’s neck. Brody just chuckled and rubbed her back as she moaned in despair.

  “If it makes you feel better, I’m more than sure that he’s nearsighted.”

  Missy snorted. “I don’t believe you.”

  “I can punch him in the eye and he’ll never look at another living thing again.”

  “I’m beginning to feel a little better,” she giggled on his chest. Her life was an homage to Murphy’s Law. Anything that could go wrong normally did. Pulling away from Brody, Missy buttoned her pants back up and walked to the couch. Grabbing a pillow, she encircled it with her arms, and pulled it back against her like a shield. An
y desire she might have felt walked out of the door the second that Bryce did. If this was a prelude to their life together, they either had to get new locks, or a bell for Bryce to wear.

  Looking up at Brody, who was staring at her, still standing where she left him, Missy asked, “How pissed off would you be if I said I was no longer in the mood to play?”

  Sighing, Brody walked over to her and dropped down on his knees in front of her. “Don’t do this, Missy.”

  “I’m not, I’m just asking.”

  “I would feel pissed off, and I would go track Bryce and kick his not-knocking ass all over the street.”

  Laughing, Missy sat back and looked down at him, smiling. “That did kind of lessen the mood for me.”

  “Yeah,” he said dryly. “Bryce has a way of doing that.”

  “I suppose you just want me to drop my pants and for us to pick up where we left out.”

  Rolling his eyes, he replied, “That would be the ideal situation, yes.”

  “I’m going to kill your brother,” Missy said, gathering her nerves again. She had been doing fine before Bryce barged in, or as fine as she could be, seeing how she was about to drop her pants, she would just have to bulk up and try again.

  “Not if I kill him first.”

  “Trust me.” Getting up, she dropped the pillow back on the couch. “Me being naked isn’t worth going to jail for.”

  “That’s debatable,” Brody murmured, getting off the ground.

  Standing in front of him, Missy took a deep breath and reached for her button again. Looking into his hungry eyes, she paused. “Brody…”

  “Do you remember the first paper you wrote for me?” he asked, walking towards her.

  “It was on Shakespeare, I think.”

  “Yes, the assignment was to write what you think Shakespeare’s take on romance was.” he reminded her gently, pulling her hands away from her button.

  “I remember.” Missy wondered where he was going with this. She couldn’t figure out what a paper and getting naked had in common, but she was willing to listen if he was willing to talk.

  “To paraphrase your paper, you surmised that Will was a misogynistic unromantic man who probably had mother issues, and was more than likely gay,” he smiled.

  “I’m not a big fan of Shakespeare.”

  “I could tell by your paper,” Brody laughed lightly. “But the thing that impressed me the most was the balls it took for you to say that. I had spent an hour raving his work and you tore apart everything I said and pointed out that the true name of Romeo and Juliet was the Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet. That they never stood a chance because of his take on love and women.

  “You made me think and you aroused my mind way before you aroused my body. You’re smart, beautiful and brave, and I admire you just as much as I love you. Don’t back down now.”

  Unbuckling her pants, Brody looked her in the eyes as he pulled them open, not bothering to unzip them. Missy saw the desire in his eyes and gave in. Feeling secure in his love, she pushed her pants off her hips and let them fall to a puddle on the ground.

  Although she was secure, she still was a bit self-conscious and sucked in her stomach, hoping to down play the bulge. Security only went so far.

  Brody didn’t even bother to look down, he just maintained eye contact and rubbed her arms gently with his hands, offering her comfort with his simple touch. “One more hand?”

  “But you still have two items,” Missy remarked.

  “One hand, winner takes all,” he whispered, brushing his lips against her. The kiss was light and gentle, much like him, and it ended just as quickly as he had started it. Brody took her hand and walked her back to the table, pushing her chair in for her. Walking past the fireplace, he pocketed something that she couldn’t see and walked to his chair.

  “Do you want to shuffle?” he asked, holding the cards out to her.

  Missy nodded and took the cards. Something felt strange, as if a lot was resting on this final hand. It was more than her clothes, it was more than his silence; it was more like their relationship was hanging in some kind of balance. Dealing the cards, she looked up at him trying to read his expression. Brody’s face was blank, and for the first time that night, Missy wasn’t so sure she wanted to win.

  Looking down at her hand, Missy was surprised to see she had dealt herself three Aces. That was surprising and exhilarating, but instead of crowing, she kept silent, trying to school her features. Taking a calming breath, she slowly placed her other two cards down on the table and waited for Brody to make his wager.

  “I’ll take two,” he said staring into her eyes.

  “I’ll do the same,” Missy replied, trying to sound calm. Brody only smirked and waited for her to deal.

  With a shaky hand, Missy dealt out the cards, before setting the deck down nervously. Closing her eyes for a moment, she said a silent prayer and picked up her cards, adding them blindly to her hand. Opening her eyes slowly, Missy almost shouted for joy as the joker smiled back at her.

  “What do you have?” Brody closed his hand and laid them face down on the table.

  “I dealt, you tell first,” she said, a lot more calmly than she felt.

  “A simple flush,” he turned his hand over one card at a time. Missy held her breath. Her four of a kind would beat his flush if it weren’t a straight or a royal. Brody flipped over a queen, a jack, a four, and a seven of diamonds and Missy let out a sigh of relief. It wasn’t a straight or a royal. She had won.

  Her feel of victory lasted briefly as he flipped over the last card. It was only a two of clubs but sitting on top of it was a diamond ring.

  Missy’s eyes widened and she looked up at him startled. Brody was watching her carefully, waiting for her reply. “It’s a diamond,” he said carefully. “The two carat kind.”

  “That’s a hell of a hand.” Missy was still in shock. Her cards trembled in her hand as she looked down at the ring and then back at him.

  “I thought so.” Brody let out a deep breath and asked, “So, do I win?”

  “I don’t think I can trump that.” Missy laid her hand face down, and fought the urge to reach across the table and grab up the ring like it was a lifeline.

  “You looked pretty sure of your hand a few seconds ago.”

  “Yeah, but talk about having a wild card.”

  “Is that all you have to say?”

  “Is there something else I should be saying?” Missy tore her eyes away from the ring and looked at him completely for the first time since he had turned the card over. For once Brody didn’t seem so sure and cocky, he looked as jumbled as her insides felt, and it only made him all the more attractive to her. “It’s not like you asked anything.”

  “If I did, what would you say?” he questioned, feeling her out.

  “I guess we’ll never know until you do,” she said, smiling. Missy felt tears welling in her eyes, a glimmering shine that was equal to the one in Brody’s eyes.

  “I know that this isn't the most romantic way to do this, both of us half dressed, sitting at a green felt table. But if you have the courage to do this, then so do I. Missy, I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”

  “Can I think about it?” she joked, “But I want to wear the ring and tell everyone that we’re getting married while I’m thinking on it.”

  “You can think as long as you want,” Brody picked up the ring and walked around the table. He pulled her chair back, got down between her legs, and took her left hand with his. Sliding the ring on her finger he said, “Just as long as you know that I’m not willing to make love to you again until you agree to marry me.”

  “I don’t think you can hold out that long,” Missy wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. Looking over his shoulder, she stared at the ring glimmering on her hand and smiled down at him. She was half-naked in the arms of the man she loved. Life didn’t get much better than this.

  “Do you want to make
a bet?”

  Epilogue

  Missy wanted to kill Brody. He was mean. He was a beast. He was going to make her come before Kayla opened the door. Biting back a moan, Missy reached out and grabbed his arms as the butterfly vibrated against her clit. Brody only chuckled and held her upright. She fought back the urge to scream as she came for the second time since they left the house.

  Not knowing when to stop had never been a real problem for Missy until they had gotten engaged. Now she’d found the daring side of herself, and bet Brody to do almost anything. Hence, the dilemma she was faced with tonight. One simple warm-up hand she had called it, a practice round before tonight’s big game. And to make it more interesting she dared him to make a little wager. If he won, she would wear the toy of his choice to the game tonight, and if she won, he had to let her be in charge again for a night. Payback was a bitch, she thought, as aftershocks rocked her body. She was going to get even if it killed her.

  Missy didn’t think he would really make her stick to the bet. Hell, she let him get away with making love to her before she said yes, although to be fair, he had made her scream “yes” several times before he fucked her that night, but still, she’d hoped he would reconsider. She should have known better; she was coming and he was amused. Life sucked.

  Gathering herself together, she looked up into his laughing eyes and muttered, “I hate you,” as she snatched her hand off him and stood, seconds before Dylan opened the door.

  “I didn’t think you guys were going to make it,” Dylan teased as he pushed the door open. “What happened?”

  “Missy was coming…” Missy elbowed him in his ribs, earning a chuckle from him and a confused look from Dylan.

  “Coming to a decision about what to wear,” she finished lamely, her face flushing, giving away her lie.

  If Dylan knew she was lying, he didn’t say anything, unlike her pig of a fiancé.

  “Did you forget whom I’m married to?” Dylan asked smiling, shutting the door closed behind them. “There’s no dress code.”

  “I heard that,” Kayla muttered, walking up behind him and slapping him on his shoulder. Leaning forward, she gave Missy a warm hug, and than turned and did the same to Brody. “Ignore him, he’s just trying to psyche me out for tonight. He knows I’m going to kick his ass.”