She kept petting the monkey.
Giving me time.
Silent encouragement.
My voice turned wistful as my mind drifted back in time. “I remember hating being a twin.”
I laughed, but the sound was pure torture.
“Hated that everyone confused us, always switching up our names. Hated that we wore the same clothes and the same eyes and the same fucking everything. Hated we were compared at every turn. Hated that he was always better. Hated most that I felt like I couldn’t do a damned thing without him. When I wasn’t with him? I always felt antsy. Like I’d forgotten something. Like I was empty.”
The last broke.
Because that was an emptiness that was going to go on forever.
Vast and wide.
I looked over at her. Moisture had gathered in those aqua eyes. The clearest ocean and the deepest sea. She shook her head. “Maybe the emptiness is meant as a reminder. Maybe it’s a gift so we don’t ever forget. So we don’t really have to live without them.”
Pain crushed my chest. Pain for her. Pain for me. It squeezed so tight I thought it might crack my ribs.
Because her voice had gone so soft. Filled with longing. I knew she’d gone missing to her own emptiness.
Clinging to the loss like it might be a good thing.
Refusing to let go.
I reached out and cupped her cheek. “You’re so brave.”
She shook her head against my hand. “No. I was so weak.”
I tried to keep my voice even, because every part of me wanted to lash out and cut down that bastard who’d made her feel that way. “It was his fault, Edie. He was the one responsible. Not you.”
“You’re wrong. I didn’t even tell him no.”
Anger fired through my nerves. “He was a man, Edie. A fucking man and you were fourteen years old. He—”
“Don’t say it,” she pled, cutting me off. “Please, Austin. Don’t say it. I don’t want to give him voice.”
She’d shifted, one leg twisted under her so she could fully face me. She clutched one of my hands in both of hers and held it against her chest. “I don’t want to allow him to steal any more of this than he already has.”
God. I wanted it to be as simple as that.
Of all the things I’d leave in the past?
It was that asshole.
But there he was. Catching up to us again.
“If he texts you again, you need to tell me, baby. None of this hiding shit. You got me?”
She nodded, moving closer. “I won’t let him take you from me again.”
Unease gusted. A gale force wind.
I knew with every part of me that was going to be on me.
That if we were going to make it, I was the one who had to fix this. I was the one who fucked it up in the first place.
A smile trembled at her mouth, the somber mood shifting as she moved to her knees. The girl’s tiny body filled up the big cab with her overpowering presence. She leaned over the bag to get to me, hair falling around her, and I lifted my face, welcomed her tentative kiss.
Her lips so soft.
So warm.
So sweet.
Vanilla and sunlight.
Blindly, I stuffed the monkey back in my bag, pushed it to the floorboards to make more room. I weaved my fingers through her hair and pulled her closer until she was straddling my lap.
Thank God for big ass trucks.
My hands wandered her back, skidding up and down, while I kissed her slow.
Long.
Deep.
She’d begun to sway, and I tucked her closer, her sweet body rubbing on my dick.
“Oh,” she whimpered. Like she was surprised. Like she had no clue how my body was going to react to her.
She pulled back. A wistful smile graced her face. “Look at us, fooling around in a truck like a couple of teenagers.”
She traced her fingers across my lips, glancing at my eyes, her tease netted in something serious and severe. Her tongue darted out to wet her lips, tentative fingertips fluttering along the hollow of my neck. “But I feel like this…right here…is where we left off. Where our time was stolen.”
She glanced up at me, insecure and bashful, teeth tugging at her lip. “And here I am, still fumbling.”
My hands framed her trusting face. “You’re perfect, Edie. Every girl I ever touched should have been you.”
Regret captured her expression, before it was chased away by the desire filling the cab.
Waters rising.
She kept moving over me, looking down as I stared up. Intensity growing and building.
That power that held us profound.
Fogged up windows.
Thrumming hearts.
Panted breaths.
“You’re so beautiful, my sweet, sweet girl.”
Her sigh was slow, and she clutched my shoulders as she rocked against me. My cock hard and begging.
Be careful with me.
I was always going to be, so I just gently gripped her hips and let her set the pace.
She rose up on her knees, her perfect tits bunched against my chest as she rode me with our clothes separating us.
Still, I didn’t think I’d ever felt so close to someone than now.
She kissed me so deep I was sure this girl managed to touch my soul.
Everything spun.
I shifted so my back rested against the door, and I spread my legs out across the long bench seat, my head against the window.
Knees on either side of me, Edie edged back, her head touching the roof, her hands on my face.
Touching.
Memorizing.
The girl left a trail of fire as she slid them down my neck and across my chest. Pressing over the spot that would forever belong to her. The girl marked on my heart.
You are good.
You are good.
I feel it here.
I felt her whispering her belief as if she’d uttered it aloud, just as sure as I could feel her entire body shaking as she moved to fumble with my fly.
My hand went to her wrist. “Baby…what are you doing?”
“I want to touch you.”
My dick jumped.
Totally on board.
I swallowed hard, beating back the lust. “You don’t have anything to prove.”
Her words were breathy. “You’ve never made me feel that way. Never. Let me touch you. Taste you.”
Oh. Fuck.
I exhaled a shuddered breath, lifting my hips a fraction so this courageous girl could tug them down.
My cock jumped free.
Edie gasped a tiny gasp, furiously chewing at that bottom lip in uncertainty as she stared at me exposed. Hard and ready.
Then she turned her attention to my face. Something bold and brave filled her eyes. Lust and desire.
She wrapped her little hands around my cock, right at the base.
So soft.
So good.
My head rocked back and I groaned her name.
Fuck.
Slowly, she tightened her hold, stroking up, palming my throbbing head like she knew exactly what to do. But she kept glancing up at me for encouragement, so clearly asking if she was doing it right, and I was cupping that sweet, sweet face, brushing my thumb across her lips. “Nothing’s ever felt so good.”
But then she dipped down. Flattened her tongue across the tip. Swirled it around.
I jumped.
And I was quick to change my mind. Because nothing had ever felt better than that.
Edie stroked me and sucked me in sync. Her hot mouth pulled hard at my head. Pulling pleasure. Pulling belief.
She glanced up. The intensity behind those eyes nearly gutted me.
The unadulterated shock.
The rapture.
The need.
The regret and remorse.
Above it all was the hope that shined around her like a white halo.
That girl taking me under her spell.
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My stomach knotted and tingles gathered at the base of my spine.
“Edie, baby, I’m going to come. Fuck, you feel so good. So good,” I mumbled as she continued the perfect assault of tongue and mouth and hands.
And this girl…
This girl just took me deeper.
Moaning as she began to writhe.
Her thighs pressing together.
And that was all I could take.
“Edie.” It was a moan as I gripped her hair, my hips lifting from the seat as she took me as deep as she could take me, holding me there in the firm clutch of her mouth while I came apart.
Fucking sublime.
She eased off and my chest was heaving, my eyes hooded as I stared back across at this girl who sat back, facing me.
Looking a little stunned.
I sat up. The pad of my thumb brushed across her swollen lips, because I just couldn’t help it. “Are you okay?”
A shy smile, and she nodded. “Really, really okay.”
And I knew she meant more, that she was feeling proud and brave.
Beyond that?
She was flushed.
Hot.
Wet and wanting.
I slanted her a grin, knowing it was predatory and full of promise.
Because God damn. This girl had just blown my mind.
I tucked myself back into my jeans, shifted to a knee, edged forward. She inched back as I moved over her and pressed her back against the door. Getting her in the same position she’d just had me.
All except for her legs.
I nudged them open.
Spreading her for me.
Her skirt gathered at her waist, her little white panties covering up that tight little body.
Edie moaned, shifted in nervous need.
I edged back, let my hands wander up the soft, soft flesh along the inside of her thighs. “You are so gorgeous, Edie. Do you know that? Did you know every night for the last four years, this is what I’ve been dreaming about? About touching you the way I never got to. Loving you the way I should have.”
An anxious, incoherent murmur mumbled from her mouth.
I hooked my fingers in the edges of her underwear, and she lifted her hips. I slowly pulled them down, the movement a little awkward in the confined space.
But so, so worth it.
Her pussy was bare, and there was nothing I could do but run my fingers through her slit.
My movements slow.
Filled with caution as I parted her.
Watching the whole time.
A groan escaped me when I found her wet and so deliriously warm.
Exquisite.
Her legs dropped open farther.
A needy sigh.
Of course, that sigh was my name.
I placed the softest kiss at her inner thigh, holding her open by the knees as I whispered at the silky flesh, “Can’t wait to taste you.”
She bucked when I licked through her folds. “Oh…God.”
My head spun with an onslaught of dizziness.
Completely consumed by her. By her taste and her trust and her touch.
How long had it been that I’d been desperate for them all? How many fantasies had played out?
But reality was always so much better than fantasy.
Because the girl was fucking spectacular.
Her whimpers filled up my ears and her belief filled up my spirit.
I lapped at the delicate flesh, tongue exploring and memorizing. I changed direction and let my tongue sweep across her clit.
Those soft fingers ripped at my hair.
I sucked and pushed two fingers into her tight body.
Her walls clenched down.
I fucked her with my fingers, my tongue stroking soft and sure against that sweet spot, my other hand burrowed into the lush skin of her ass.
Her body bowed. Tightening. The energy rising higher and higher.
And she was making all these little noises that shot straight through me, all her pleasure dependent on the hands I’d come to hate.
The ones that’d caused so much destruction.
And fuck…all I wanted…all I wanted was to hold on to something good. To be responsible for it.
And then this girl…this girl broke as I held her in the palm of my hands.
Shattered.
Her hands fisted in my hair. And she was trying to hide the scream that erupted from her throat as pleasure took her hostage.
The severity roared and raced. Bounding around the confined space. She clamped around my fingers that were touching her deep.
She was panting, her body still bowed when I pulled her back onto my lap. My mouth demanding as I kissed this girl.
The girl.
The girl I’d once thought another penalty. The loss of her had almost been more than I could bear. It’d sent me spiraling to a depth I never could have anticipated.
Rock bottom.
She moaned my name, kissed me back. My mouth moved, this time a breath from her lips. And the words were so fucking low, like grit as I sang them quietly into the confines of the cab.
“My whole world in black and white…Until I was staring at it through the eyes of Firelight. Let me see it through the eyes of Firelight.”
Edie pressed against me. Clinging.
I wrapped my arms around her waist, buried my face against the beat hammering in her chest. “You change everything, Edie. Everything.”
We stayed that way for the longest time. Holding each other the way we always should have done. She leaned down, her lips gentle at the top of my head, at my temple, at my mouth. “Together,” she said.
I breathed out relieved laughter, giving her another squeeze. Helped her back into her underwear. Touched her face.
The windows were fogged and the cab steamy.
“We’d better get you inside.”
“Yeah,” she agreed, and I hopped down from the cab, silently moved around the truck and helped her down. We held hands as I walked her to her door.
She hesitated, glancing back at me, and I kissed her slow. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Promise?” She smiled a shy smile. “This almost feels…like a dream.”
I tugged her close, murmured at her mouth. “You are my dream.” I pecked her lips before I nipped at them to lighten the mood. “I’ll see you tomorrow. I promise.”
“Okay.” She let herself into her house, and I shoved my hands into my pockets, rocked back on my heels while I waited to hear the lock engage, then waited a little longer because I couldn’t seem to be able to pull myself away.
With a smile pulling at the edge of my mouth, I finally spun around and headed back to my truck, swung open the door.
Then I fucking froze.
I could feel it.
The freezing cold chill that slid down my spine. The presence encroaching on me from behind was definitely not the pleasant kind.
Slowly I turned.
That big, burly motherfucker stood there with his fists clenched, looking like an irate bull who was getting ready to charge.
And apparently I was wearing red.
I stood up taller.
Knew I could take him simply because I knew exactly what I was fighting for.
His face pinched, and he gave his head a harsh, disbelieving shake. “You think she doesn’t deserve better than that? A quick fuck in some piece of shit truck?”
This guy didn’t have the first clue what Edie deserved.
Had no idea she deserved absolutely everything.
All things good.
And I was going to be the one to give them to her.
I tipped my voice into something I hoped was placating, knowing full well it was edged in spite. Just couldn’t curb it. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, man. Maybe the better question would be what the hell are you doing, lurking out here like some kind of perv?”
He flinched.
Yeah, asshole. Not cool.
He shook it
off. “You know that’s not what I was doing. Heard that pile pulling in here close to forty minutes ago. You think I didn’t know what was going down?”
“I know you don’t know what was going down. But even if you did, it isn’t any of your business, so I suggest you take a step back and cool the fuck down. Edie doesn’t answer to you.”
And I sure as hell didn’t.
He tore at his hair. “I waited for her. Fucking waited for years for her to be ready. And you waltz in here and rip her right out from under me.”
My brow twisted, and I took a step forward as I cocked my head. “Did she ever tell you once to wait for her? Did she ever give you any indication there was more to the two of you than what you made up in your head?”
His rebuttal flew out fast. “I’d treat her right.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
Silence. No words said as he stared at me through the hazy glow of silvery moonlight. Because we both knew she hadn’t.
I roughed a hand over my face. Because fuck. This was Edie’s friend and I wanted to tear into him. Beat him if only for the fact I knew where his thoughts had been.
In her body and in her head.
But I knew well enough you couldn’t help what the heart claimed. “I’m sorry, Jed. Sorry if you’re hurting. Sorry if it hurts you to see her with me. But I’m not going anywhere. As long as Edie wants me…this is where I’m gonna be.”
He seethed the words. “Hurt her, asshole…hurt her…and I’ll be coming for you.”
A snort shot from my nose and I hopped into my truck. I leaned out to grab the interior handle, attention turned on Jed. “I sincerely hope you do.”
Because the thought of hurting Edie again?
I’d rather be dead.
Heidi swung her feet where she sat on the counter beside me. I pushed the old-school cash register drawer closed with a clink. “There,” I said. “All done.”
“All done!” She offered me one of those crooked smiles showcasing her two missing teeth.
Affection pulsed my heart an extra beat.
“Thank you so much for helping me.” I ruffled her hair.
“Workin’ at the shop is my fav’rite,” she said with her cute lisp.
“Well, that’s a good thing, because you working here at the shop with me is my favorite, too.”
Her entire face lit up, and I picked her up from under her arms and set her safely on the ground. I glanced at the clock.
Wait (Bleeding Stars #4) Page 16
