Deborah Camp

by To Seduce andDefend

  “All is right with the world,” he said, grasping her shoulders and pulling her against him. Their gazes met in the mirror. “You look like a woman who was just made love to.”

  She smiled, knowing it was true. “And you look like a satisfied man.”

  “Oh, I am.” He kissed the side of her neck again. “But I can’t go for long without having you, Jennie.”

  His confession emboldened her. “Where are we headed, Zachary?”

  “Mmm?” he murmured, nuzzling her ear.

  “How do you feel about me? Do you love me?”

  His gaze bounced to hers again in the mirror. “That’s a mighty big word. Love.”

  “A big word for a big emotion,” she said, then released a long breath. “I love you.”

  “Do you? Are you sure?” he asked.

  “I am positive,” she answered without pause.

  “Well, I guess that makes me the luckiest guy around.”

  Jennie held his gaze in the mirror, willing him to say the words that she felt for certain were dancing on his tongue. Just when she thought she’d been wrong, he sucked in a gulping breath.

  “I love you, too, Jennie.” He let out the rest of the breath. “Whew! There. I said it.”

  “Was it that difficult? I thought you fell in love every time you were with a woman. That’s what you told me once. Remember?”

  He glanced up at the ceiling. “Using my words against me? That’s no fair.”

  She laughed lightly and turned around to face him. “You didn’t mean it?”

  “Oh, I meant it – at the time. That’s before you had lassoed and hog-tied my heart. You and that little boy of yours proved too hard to resist.”

  She walked the fingertips of one hand up the front of his shirt. “Well, when two people are in love, they usually make plans to marry.” It felt as if the temperature in the room suddenly changed, becoming noticeably colder. Jennie looked up at Zach through the veil of her lashes and saw the tension in his face and that the smile was gone from his lips. “Zach?”

  He captured her hands and took a step back. “Jennie, you’re moving a mite fast, don’t you think? Remember how I told you that I don’t put much faith in marriage?”

  “Yes, but I was hoping you had changed your opinion.”

  “I haven’t. Oh, now, don’t look so sad. I would rather be honest with you than to fail you, and that’s what would happen if we married. The odds are that we would not continue to be happy with each other and we would either stay together and be miserable like my parents or we would be in divorce court.”

  “It doesn’t have to be either of those options and you know it,” Jennie said, tugging her hands from his. “You have seen good marriages. You just prefer to ignore them.”

  “I have seen a few good marriages and many, many more bad ones.”

  “That’s because it’s your job to deal with the bad ones. If you were in some other work, you would not be so jaded.”

  “Jennie … Jennie, listen to me.” He grabbed her by the shoulders and waited for her gaze to find his. “I want to be with you. I want to live together. We can live in your house while I build us a bigger one. I’ll treat Oliver as if he were my own flesh and blood. We will take it one day at a time.”

  The depth of her love for him was deeper than she’d even known until that moment when she was all but ready to agree to live with him and be his lover. But then a small face swam into view – a face with big, brown eyes and a Cupid’s bow mouth. She loved that face more than life itself.

  Jennie shook her head. “Zach, I love you so much that being your lover and not your wife probably would be enough for me. Oh, I would always yearn to be Mrs. Warner, but I would believe that I would wear you down after a few years and you would finally make it so.”

  “You’re right. You probably will,” he said, chuckling under his breath.

  “But I have someone else to consider. Oliver. And my son deserves a father and not a boarder.”

  If she had splashed him with ice-cold water, he wouldn’t have looked more chilled. His hands slipped down her arms to her wrists and she felt a slight tremor in his fingers.

  “Jennie, it doesn’t have to be that way. Marriage is only a piece of paper. Oliver wouldn’t care if we had the document or not.”

  “That document would make you Oliver’s relative – his step-father, his only father. It’s more important than simply a piece of paper and you know it, Zachary. You are witness every day in court to the importance of that paper. It binds people together and to break free of it, they can’t just wave good riddance. They have to legally dissolve the union. People think long and hard before they take that step, especially when children are involved.” She moved away from him to stand by the window where moonlight had pooled.

  For a minute or two they were silent, each lost in their own thoughts. Jennie looked over her shoulder to see that he was sitting on the bed, his head in his hands.

  “Your parents might have stayed together because of you and your siblings. Maybe they couldn’t bear the thought of either one of them moving away from the family, the children.”

  “That’s a romantic way to look at it, but I don’t think they cared that much for any of us.”

  “They cared enough to provide a home for you. They could have busted up and farmed you out to relatives. I hear about people doing that, although I can’t imagine it.”

  “Yeah, I’ve seen that happen. I hadn’t thought of it that way, but I suppose my ma and pa could have taken an easier path. I know it was hell most of the time for them to live under the same roof. I always wondered why one of them didn’t just pack it in.”

  “Children change everything, Zach. They change how you feel, how you think, how you see the world, and what you will endure.” She drew in a breath as she moved across the room to him. “I hope someday you will know this for yourself because then you will understand how, aside from burying my husband, telling you that I can’t accept just being your friend and lover is the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” Touching his shoulder, she felt her heart expand almost painfully when he lifted his head and his shimmering blue eyes focused on her. “I love my son and that is why I can’t accept anything less than a man we can call our own.”

  Arriving back at the boarding house after leaving Zach, Jennie felt melancholy and yearned to be in her room alone with her thoughts. Her plan crumbled when she stepped into the parlor and saw that Sarah was waiting for her.

  “I hope you don’t mind my dropping by,” Sarah said, rising from the settee. She wore a gray and rose jacket and skirt that Jennie had added piping to along the hem, collar, and cuffs, giving it a crisper and more modern look.

  “I’m so happy you did,” Jennie said. “Did you see Oliver? He’s around here somewhere.”

  “Yes, he breezed through here with a little girl a few minutes ago. I believe they were headed for the kitchen where Mrs. Philpot was serving up glasses of milk and oatmeal cookies.”

  “Let’s sit down.” Jennie chose one of the chairs and Sarah sat on the settee again. “I could make us some tea, if you’d like refreshments.”

  “No, I can’t stay long. I came by to let you know that I’ll be leaving Guthrie in a day or two.”

  “Oh? Why?”

  “My divorce is final. My court date was yesterday and my divorce was granted. It’s done. I’m a free woman now.”

  “I’m happy for you, Sarah.” Jennie marveled at the irony. Here she was pining for a husband and Sarah was thrilled to be rid of one. “But I will sorely miss you. You are my voice of reason. I can always come to you for sound advice.”

  “It’s a load off my shoulders, having this business behind me now. Guthrie has been an adventure, but I miss my children terribly.”

  “Oh, yes. You must. It’s been so many weeks since you’ve seen them.”

  “Although they are older, they still need their mother and their mother still needs them.” She tilted her head to one side. “Have I m
ade you sad?”

  “Yes, but I’ll survive.” She knew that her sadness had more to do with Zach than with Sarah’s departure, but she wasn’t ready to discuss that with anyone – not even Sarah, who had become her confidant. “I can’t imagine being away from Oliver for months. You will have such a happy reunion with them!”

  “I hope your problems are soon ironed out, Jennie. I will be sending good wishes your way every day.”

  “Oh! I must tell you, Sarah, that I received good news about that. Oliver is going to inherit the land and I will be the trustee until he is twenty-one.”

  Sarah gave a gasp and her eyes widened. “When did this all happen?”

  “It hasn’t quite happened, but it is in the works. Zach discovered that Charles was not divorced long enough to marry, so his marriage to Luna is unlawful.”

  “Splendid! I love thinking of that hateful biddy getting her comeuppance.” Sarah popped a fist into the palm of her other hand and her dark eyes sparked with triumph. “Do you think Luna knew that he hadn’t been divorced long enough to remarry?”

  “Oh, yes. She knew.”

  “So, she was knowingly keeping the land from you and your son? That is unforgiveable. I daresay there is a special corner in Hell for people like her.”

  “We reap what we sow,” Jennie said with a shrug. “Which is why things have turned out for you, Sarah. You are a good person and you have been a good friend to me. Will you write?”

  “Only if you promise to write back.”

  “That, I will.”

  They stood up in unison and laughed, then hugged each other. Jennie felt tears sting the back of her eyes, but she managed to keep them from spilling.

  “Take care, Sarah.”

  “I will, and I will think of you and Oliver happily living in your little house outside of Guthrie.”

  Jennie walked her to the door and around to the side of the house where she had left her horse and buggy. Sarah climbed up onto the seat and Jennie recalled their meeting and how she had ridden with her to the dry goods store.

  “I owe you so much, Sarah,” she said, smiling up at her. “Thank you.

  “Be happy, Jennie. Life is short.” The buggy gave a jerk and then rolled away.

  Jennie watched until it was a dot on the street before she turned and went back into the house. She wandered into the kitchen where Oliver and Molly were having milk and cookies with Gloria Philpot and Dottie Dandridge.

  “Mama, want a cookie?” Oliver asked, a grin widening his milk mustache.

  “No, thank you. I bet they’re good, though.”

  “Deeelicious,” Oliver declared.

  “Deeelicious,” Molly echoed.

  “I’m glad you’re both here,” Jennie said, looking at Mrs. Philpot and then at Dottie. “I have an announcement.” She waited a few moments, letting the drama build. “It appears that Oliver is going to inherit the land Charles bought.”

  Mrs. Philpot clapped her hands together and gave a little squeak. Dottie’s mouth dropped open and her eyes widened to the size of silver dollars. Delighted by their reactions, Jennie couldn’t help but laugh.

  “It’s true,” she assured them. “Zach discovered that Charles’s marriage to Luna isn’t legal because he married her before he was divorced for a full six months.”

  “Glory be,” Mrs. Philpot said. “I’m so happy for you, I could bust out in song.”

  “Why does Oliver inherit the land and not you?” Dottie asked.

  “Because our divorce, unfortunately, was legal and stands. Although, I will never feel like a divorced woman.”

  “How could you?” Mrs. Philpot stood and draped an arm around Jennie’s shoulders. “As far as you were concerned, he was your husband until he drew his last breath.”

  “Mama, are we going to move?”

  “Yes, Oliver. We are going to move into that little house on the land that Papa bought.”

  “When? Can we move tomorrow?”

  “No, not that soon,” Jennie said with a laugh. “There are still some legal matters to handle. I also hear that Melvin Parks has been arrested for –.” She glanced at the children and chose her words carefully. “For what happened to Stella Carlson.”

  “It’s a day full of wonderful news,” Dottie said. “Sarah told you about her divorce?”

  Jennie nodded and sat at the kitchen table. The other two women joined her there. Dottie reached for a cookie. Mrs. Philpot shrugged and grabbed one too.

  “My divorce hearing is next week,” Dottie said.

  “That means I will be losing both of you lovely ladies soon,” Mrs. Philpot noted with a sigh. “That’s the hardest part about running this house. Some people I can’t want to see the backside of and some of them I wish could live here forever.”

  “I won’t ask which group I’m in.” Dottie bit into the cookie, her light brown eyes dancing with mischief.

  “That’s good because I wouldn’t want to hurt your feelings,” Mrs. Philpot said, playing right along.

  “Oh, you two.” Jennie batted a hand at them and they all laughed. “We will remain friends, won’t we? I told Sarah that I would write her and I will do the same for you, Dottie. As for you …” She turned toward Mrs. Philpot. “I expect we will visit back and forth.”

  “I’ll hold you to that,” Mrs. Philpot said. “I’ve grown right fond of you and Oliver.”

  “Oliver, don’t you think it’s time to get ready for bed?”

  “I guess.”

  “Drink the last of your milk and let’s go upstairs.”

  “Mama, I want to move to the ranch tomorrow!”

  Jennie shook her head at his impatience and that deviling melancholy stole through her again, tempering her happiness. “I know, but we don’t always get everything we want, son.”

  Bertha Polk entered Zach’s office, came to an abrupt halt, and propped her fists on her ample hips. “Well, what’s wrong with you this morning?”

  Zach sat straighter in the office chair and gave her a quizzical glance before he remembered his bruised face. “It’s nothing. Judge Bishop threw some sucker punches.”

  “I’m not talking about your kisser. You’ve been moping about all morning. I got here bright and early and you were already sitting there in that chair staring out the window like you’d lost a big case. You should be as happy as a cat! You got Jennie Hastings’ land for her, didn’t you?”

  “Yes, and I am happy about that.”

  She pursed her lips and scowled at him. “I can see that you’re overjoyed.” She waited for him to say something more and when he didn’t, she heaved a sigh. “And I hear that Melvin Parks is in jail for Stella’s murder.”

  “Not yet,” Zach said, raising a finger. “I saw Deputy Lane last night at the Blue Belle Saloon and he said they were going out to the ranch today and arrest him.”

  “So you were at the Blue Belle last night? Trying to drink yourself into a better mood? What’s wrong with you, Zach? And don’t hand me horse manure and tell me it’s a chocolate pie. I know the difference!” Sitting down in the chair, she folded her arms and set her face in stubborn lines.

  Zach knew he had lost the battle, so he surrendered with a groan. He washed his face with his hands and then faced his inquisitor. “It’s Jennie.”

  “What about her?”

  “She says she loves me.”

  “And this makes you unhappy?”

  “No, it makes me … feel blessed.”

  “You don’t look like a man who feels blessed. You look like a man who’s miserable.”

  “She’s just so damned stubborn. She won’t give an inch. Not an inch!”

  “I don’t follow.”

  “She wants marriage. It’s either marry her or lose her.”

  A slow smile spread across Bertha’s face. “She’s got you by the short hairs, doesn’t she, Zachary Thomas?”

  “Stubborn. Women are stubborn.”

  “So are men. You’re stuck on your ideas of marriage and she’s stuck
on hers. Most women want marriage.”

  “Why? I keep thinking that humans aren’t cut out for staying true to one person forever. It happens so rarely.”

  “That’s not true, Zach. You see marriages that don’t work, but there are just as many – no, a lot more that do work. I can’t imagine life without Adam Polk. I wake up thinking about him and I go to bed thinking about him.”

  Zach smiled. “That sounds nice.”

  “It is. Finding your mate is wonderful, but Jennie has more to think about than just finding a good husband, you know.”

  “Oliver,” he said, reading her mind. “That’s why she is insisting on marriage or nothing.”

  “That’s because she has a good head on her shoulders and she’s a good mother. She won’t place any man above her son and that’s the way it should be. He is flesh of her flesh. You are someone she has fallen in love with, but you aren’t family.” Bertha unfolded her arms and leaned forward. “Don’t you understand? Once you take those vows, you become each other’s closest living relative. Closer than your mama or papa or brothers or sisters. You are joined. You’re partners in life. It means a lot, Zach.” She took a breath. “How do you feel about her boy?”

  Zach felt a grin tug at his mouth. “He’s the son I would want to have. He’s smart and brave and he has a big heart.”

  “Oliver and Jennie just don’t mean enough to you.”

  He stared at her, not liking the sound of that.

  “You’ll lose them because you won’t take a chance on marriage. I’ve seen you take all kinds of risks in the court room and I’ve seen you place bets on poker hands that weren’t worth spit, but marriage is just too high a mountain to climb.”

  He stood up so quickly that his chair almost toppled over. “Well, hell, when you put it like that!”

  “That’s the way it is, Zach,” Bertha said softly. “That’s the way it is.” She stood and left him to brood.

  Turning toward the window, he looked down at the street and saw a couple walking hand in hand. The sight stabbed him in the heart. God, he was a miserable piece of —. His thoughts were cut in two when he spotted a familiar vehicle speeding along the road, People moved out of its path. One man shook a fist at the buggy, angry at almost being flattened by it.