The Touch Of The Outcast

by Amalia Altman

  “When were they born?” she asked.

  “Two weeks ago,” Julian said to her. “Do you want one?”

  She looked at him with her eyebrows raised. “What?”

  “Would you like one of the horses?” Julian asked her. “Everybody has their own. I can give you an adult or you can have one of these babies. The one on the right is a boy, the other is a girl. We haven’t named them yet.”

  Elise stared at him, dumbfounded, her mouth slightly open as if she was going to speak. “You’re giving me a horse,” she said.

  “Yes,” Julian said, delighted with how surprised she looked, how pleased. She looked at the colts again, then made her way around the stables, looking into each stall as she went.

  “Who is this?” she asked, stopping in front of the stall of a small, waifish mare who lingered in the back corner, looking tentatively at Elise with her big brown eyes.

  “This one doesn’t have a name,” Julian told her, and she shot a look at him.

  “Why not?”

  “Thomas thinks she’s bad luck,” Julian said, watching as Elise reached her arm slowly into the pen.

  “Why?”

  “She belonged to Lady Sanchess of Rollifort, just a few kilometers from this estate. The horse showed up in the middle of the night one night, completely spooked, jumping and kicking at Thomas whenever he tried to get close. I managed to bring her back here. The next day was when they found Lady Sanchess’ body.”

  “Her body?” Elise asked, turning her face away from the horse to look at Julian. “She was dead?”

  “You really haven’t heard? I’m surprised the girls never talked about it.”

  “All the girls talked about was cock,” she said, and then her face blushed a scarlet red, her hand flying up to cover her mouth.

  “Wow,” Julian said, laughing. She looked away from him, unable to meet his eye.

  “I’m so sorry, my lord,” she said, almost stumbling over her words. “Really— “

  “Too much time spent in a brothel,” Julian said. “What did those girls do to your innocence?”

  “They destroyed it, apparently,” she said, giggling and shaking her head.

  “You’ve got a mouth as well as a temper,” Julian said. “I’ll have to keep that in mind next time I make you angry.”

  “Maybe you should just avoid making me angry,” she said. Her embarrassment had seemed to calm and now she was giving Julian a teasing look, one that told him she was being playful with him, that she had let down her guard, at least for now.

  “That all depends on how well you can behave yourself, Elise,” he said, his voice soft.

  “I always behave myself, my lord,” she said, licking her lips as she spoke to him. He found himself leaning into her, wanting to get closer, to breathe in her scent even amidst the hay and the horses. She pulled away from him before he could get too close, turning back to the horse, who had taken a step closer while they weren’t paying attention.

  “Tell me what happened to Lady Sanchess,” Elise said.

  Julian cleared his throat. He wasn’t sure about discussing the gory details of the Lady Sanchess’ death with a woman, let alone one as young and innocent as Elise seemed to be.

  “I don’t think it’s appropriate— “

  “Oh, shove appropriate,” she said, grinning at him. “Tell me.”

  “Elise— “

  “Please, my lord,” she said, looking at him with a slight pout on her face, one that made that wild part of him stir again.

  “Lady Sanchess was found murdered at her estate,” Julian said, hesitant to go into details.

  “How?” Elise asked, her voice full of interest. Julian shot her an exasperated look, but she wasn’t looking at him, instead focusing her attention on the mare, trying to gently coax the horse to come forward.

  “She was—I’m told she was stabbed. Several times.”

  “I did hear about that,” Elise said, glancing over her shoulder at him. “The girls said that a woman was murdered down in Barkley.”

  “That wasn’t her, but there have been a handful of murders in the past few weeks, all noblewomen.”

  “It should be all over the papers,” Elise said. “I haven’t seen anything about it.”

  Julian took a deep breath, knowing that he shouldn’t be giving her the information. It was hard to tell her no, though, so he continued talking. The horse stepped forward as he spoke, finally close enough to let Elise pet her muzzle.

  “The inspector is trying to keep things as quiet as possible for now,” Julian said. “So don’t go talking about it on your days off.”

  “Am I allowed to leave here on my days off, my lord?”

  “You may go wherever you’d like,” Julian told her. She stroked the horse’s neck, cooing at her softly for a moment, leaning in to whisper something in the mare’s ear.

  “What are you telling her?” Julian asked.

  “Her name,” Elise said, glancing back at him. “I’m telling her what her name is.”

  “She’s the one you want?” Julian asked, skeptical. “She’s not very strong. We don’t know how well she rides; she won’t let anybody on. You can have one of the colts, or another mare.”

  “I want her,” Elise said, gazing at the horse. “She’ll let me ride.”

  Looking at them together, Julian almost believed it. The horse nuzzled Elise’s shoulder, its frail body relaxing as she stroked its mane. Julian moved from the stall, leaving the two of them together as he went to his own horse’s pen. The horse was standing at the edge of it, already waiting for Julian, his massive, shaggy black head sticking forward for his master to stroke his muzzle.

  “Is he yours?” Elise asked, coming up behind Julian.

  “Yes. His name is King.”

  “King,” she said, reaching around Julian to pet the horse’s mane. “He’s beautiful.”

  “He is,” Julian said, gazing with pride over the massive, all-black stallion that he had raised from a newborn colt. “He’s the one I usually ride.”

  “He suits you,” she said. “All tough and dark.”

  Julian grinned, looking over at her. “Am I tough, you think?”

  “You try to be,” she said, “but you’re not very good at it.”

  Julian laughed. “No?”

  “No,” she said, shaking her head, a playful smile on her lips. She held his eye for a moment, chewing on her bottom lip before looking away.

  “Maybe I should get back to work,” she said softly, though she seemed reluctant to end their time in the stables.

  “Yes, I probably should too,” Julian said. “But feel free to come out here whenever you’d like.”

  “Thank you, my lord,” Elise said, and looked genuinely grateful as they left the stables together and walked back toward the mansion. Julian had the strong urge to take her hand as they crossed the lawn, but he fought it, content instead just to walk in her presence.

  They returned to the mansion and arrived at the back door where Julian turned around to face her before they went inside and parted ways.

  “What did you name her?” Julian asked. “Your horse.”

  “It’s a secret,” Elise said. “I don’t even know if she likes it or not yet.”

  “How will you tell?” he asked her. He found that he was smiling again, something he rarely did outside of his conversations with Nikola.

  “She’ll let me know,” Elise said with a sparkle in her eye. “Thank you for the tour, my lord.”

  “Will I see you at dinner tonight?” Julian asked her.

  She raised her eyebrows. “I didn’t think you dined with the servants, my lord.”

  “I eat alone when I’m working, but when I have free time, I eat with Nikola. You’re welcome to join us.”

  She thought about it for a minute, holding his eye.

  “I might,” was all she said. She
moved past him and in through the back door, disappearing into the servant’s hallway before he had a chance to say anything else.

  Chapter 6

  Elise looked in the mirror before dinner. She was wearing one of the simple dresses that had been provided for her in her wardrobe. It was pale blue and lovely, cinched at the waist in the current style and flowing down her legs to her ankles. The gown was simpler than she had gotten used to at the brothel, but Elise found it comfortable and pretty, and she was satisfied by the time she went down to dinner, though there was a certain nervousness in her stomach when she thought about seeing the lord of the mansion again. Elise had thought about him over the last few hours as she had been doing her duties—she had sworn that he had been about to touch her several times over their encounter. She had even thought, during a few fleeting seconds in the stable, that he would kiss her, though Elise knew that was ridiculous. Even if Lord Ashton did want to kiss her, it would be only as he would a whore, for fun and temporary pleasure. It wouldn’t mean anything, just like that heat in his eyes when he looked at her probably didn’t mean anything, either.

  Elise went down to the dining room where Nikola and Lord Ashton were already seated across from each other.

  “I’m sorry I’m late,” said Elise, hurrying in, taking a seat next to Nikola at the table. It put her across from Lord Ashton, who met her eye.

  “Did you fall asleep?” he asked her, his eyes traveling over her hair, which had wriggled free from her braid throughout the day and was dangling in curling tendrils around her face.

  “No,” she said, blushing and pushing her hair back. He seemed to like that, watching her with interest as she attempted to make herself more presentable. “I was just busy.”

  “Julian says you chose a horse today,” Nikola said. “He says you picked the cursed one.”

  “She’s not cursed,” Elise protested. “She just needs the right touch.”

  “I think you’ve got the right touch,” Julian said, and Elise shivered at the words. Every time she thought about touching him, she got lost in the idea of it, wondering what kinds of things he might be thinking when she felt his skin. She had almost been so curious earlier in the garden that she had almost taken his hand, but had thought better of it. Whatever was going on behind those eyes, that look he gave her was something that she had no business thinking about, let alone trying to read.

  “Did you go to town today, Nikola?” Elise asked her, wanting to change the subject. She was feeling overheated in the large dining room, though the cool stone walls usually made the place uncomfortably cold. There was a fire lit at the opposite end of the table, but Elise still felt like she was sitting too close to it every time she met Lord Ashton’s eye.

  “Yes,” said Nikola cheerfully. “I went into London to see my sister.”

  “How did it go?” Elise asked. She could feel Lord Ashton’s eyes on her face every time she asked a question, and suddenly wished that the two of them were alone. It almost felt like they were alone every time they looked at each other, something that alarmed Elise and made her avoid his eye as much as possible while Nikola was in the room.

  “It went well,” said Nikola. She glanced between Elise and Julian, and for a moment Elise was worried that the older woman sensed the tension that was between them. If she noticed, though, she didn’t mention it, instead turning to Julian.

  “I spoke to the inspector in town today. He says he’ll be by to speak with you tomorrow.”

  Julian sighed in exasperation, his jaw going tight. “Nikola—"

  “I’m sorry, Julian, but I couldn’t put him off any longer.”

  He shook his head, closing his eyes. “What exactly did he say to you?”

  “Just that he needed to speak to you,” Nikola said, a look of concern on her face. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about this time.”

  He seemed to grit his teeth. “I think I have plenty to worry about, Nikola,” he said. Elise looked between the two of them, but for the life of her, couldn’t figure out what they were talking about. It was frustrating her, but there was nothing she could do, no question she could ask that would get her more information without looking like she was blatantly snooping into her employer’s business. Elise already knew from experience how little he liked for his servants to pry, so she stayed quiet, hoping that more information would come from then naturally.

  Julian seemed only then to remember that Elise was in the room. His eyes met hers and he cleared his throat.

  “Thank you for letting me know,” he said. “I suppose I’ll have to prepare myself to speak to him.”

  Elise gave up on trying to figure out what they were talking about. She wasn’t going to get anywhere by asking them questions directly, only by listening, paying close attention to what was going on.

  The rest of dinner was quiet. The news that the inspector would be dropping by had put him in a low mood, and he barely met her eye again throughout the rest of the meal. Elise could see the tension in his face and wondered what kind of man he was, if he would let it eat him alive or erupt in a fit of frustration.

  He stood up at the end of the meal.

  “Thank you,” he said to both of them. “Good night, ladies.”

  “Good night,” Elise said softly, watching his face, the tightness of his jaw as he disappeared from the room.

  “Is he okay?” Elise asked Nikola. Nikola looked after him, concern on her face.

  “He gets stressed,” she said. “It’s nothing to worry about. He’ll work himself to sleep and wake up a new man.”

  “He seems stressed often,” Elise said. “Is it his work?”

  Nikola sighed, looking at her sternly. “Elise, there are some things you must accept about living in this household. It will do you no good to try to learn more about our lord. He’s a very private man, and he has not hesitated to let maids go in the past who pried into his business.”

  “I’m sorry,” Elise said, blushing. “I’m not trying to be a busybody, I’m just curious.”

  Nikola’s gaze softened. “I understand, child. I was your age once. You grow and you learn that other people’s affairs are more trouble than they’re worth. There’s enough to deal with on your own as a woman in this world; don’t try to carry our lord’s burden.”

  “I won’t,” Elise promised, though she didn’t know if it was truthful or not. Her curiosity was burning at her—not just about the house, but about her employer. The more she learned about him, the more she wanted to know, but she bit her tongue to keep from asking further questions and excused herself from the table. Elise made her way upstairs and went into her room, done with work for the day and planning to visit the stables. She lamented the fact that she had nothing to ride in—back home, she had worn her brother’s trousers to go riding when he was gone off to his job, but now she was resigned to wearing one of the pretty dresses and hoping that it didn’t get too dirty.

  Elise was in her room changing when she heard a noise upstairs on the third floor. It was the knocking sound again, a loud pounding, followed by a shriek that made her jump out of her skin. The sound lasted for a long time, loud and high-pitched, the banging on the floor continuous and deafening. Elise felt a chill run down her spine—the shriek sounded almost inhuman to her, like something out of a nightmare.

  The banging continued, and Elise left her room despite the fact that she knew she shouldn’t. She made her way toward the staircase, peering up to see that the door to the third floor was slightly open. It was then that the shouting stopped, the banging cutting off abruptly. Elise strained to listen until she heard footsteps. She turned around, trying to hurry quickly down the hall before the door upstairs opened fully and Julian appeared at the top of the stairs. He looked livid, his eyes flashing with anger and frustration as he came down the stairs.

  “What are you doing out here, Elise?” he asked, coming toward her in a way that was almost predatory. Elise
felt a shiver run through her as he approached, standing within a few feet of her.

  “I heard shouting upstairs,” she said, deciding not to lie. “Was it you?”

  He gritted his teeth. His gaze seemed to be made of steel as he looked at her, and there was little remaining of the interest he had shown in her before, when they’d been in the stables. “How many times do I have to tell you to mind your own business?”

  “It is my business. I live in this house,” Elise said.

  “Maybe you shouldn’t live in this house,” he said, studying her face.

  “Are you going to send me away, my lord?” Elise asked, holding his eye. There was something about his temper that gave him the demeanor of a wildcat, dangerous and lithe, almost sensual.

  “I’d rather not,” he said. “You seem like a good girl.”

  “Do I?”

  “Rather disobedient,” he said, “but capable. I don’t want to let you go, Elise.”

  For some reason, the words made her heart flutter in her chest.

  “So don’t,” she said. A small smile flickered over his face.

  “Behave yourself,” he said, a final warning before he turned to leave. Once he’d disappeared into his office, Elise only paused for a moment before she started back in the direction of the stairs. She knew that she shouldn’t, that she was risking her job and her home. Despite his interest in her, Julian had not been kidding when he’d warned her to stay away from the third floor.

  Elise looked around, making sure that Julian’s door was still closed as she crept up the stairs on light feet. She reached for the door, holding her breath, but found it locked when she tried it. She wasn’t surprised, and was glad that she’d remembered to take her keys from her room. There were seven keys in all, and Elise repeatedly glanced over her shoulder as she tried each one. She was disappointed to find that none of them worked, and wondered where the key to the third floor was—she imagined it was in Julian’s office.