Control

by James D. Horton

  “You have spirit, spunk as they say,” Miranda smiles. “Luna loves that in her girls. She and Wolf have, over the years, adopted many young vampires; educating them, preparing them to survive and even thrive in Society. It is something of a penchant for them.”

  “So they have been together a long time? Where has she been the past few weeks? I haven’t seen her or even really heard of her.”

  Miranda sips her tea obviously deciding either what or how much to tell me. “They had been apart for, oh twenty years or so this time.”

  “Had been?”

  “Yes, she is in town now. There is not much Calhoun does not hear even though we live mostly apart from Society.”

  “Does Wolf know?” I’m not sure why I’m surprised.

  “Yes.”

  There had to be a reason he dropped me and has avoided me ever since I was turned by Athene, I should have known there would be another woman involved. My stomach is tight and it feels like my chest is being squeezed. Once before, I came home and found my boyfriend in bed with another woman, one who was supposed to be my friend. He had made light of it then, inviting me to join them even. Those two are still together as far as I know, married with three kids. The betrayal is what hurts the most. I feel the beast purring inside, feeding on my upset and amplifying it, though now I recognize what it is doing so I push it aside. I’m not it, I will have my own feelings. This is the way it is. I don’t need him anyway; Athene is taking care of me. I’ll make my own way in the world and I don’t need any man to hold my hand while I do it.

  “Well, I guess that’s that,” I push out a sigh.

  Miranda reaches over to pat my hand on the table. “He cares for you,” she asserts.

  “Oh yeah? So much he can bang me and then run back to this other woman?” I can’t stop the angry flash before the words leave my mouth. Miranda’s eyes cast down and I regret my harshness instantly. “I’m sorry, look . . . “

  “No, you’re right,” she says. “It is a hard thing to understand. You’re new to your condition, you’re young and you love him. I see it, I think in a way he does too. Do you want to know what I think he sees in you?”

  “An easy lay?” I fume, the pain still sharp inside.

  “No,” she confides. “He sees what he has left behind. He sees your humanity, how much you care, and how much you give of yourself to the world around you. That is what calls to him. He walks a dark, dark path. He thinks there is a third way, one that Calhoun has only found mentioned in passing or in rumors. Dallas thinks he can go out the bottom, divesting himself of all that makes him human to become something more. He sees just as the old ones among us see that we cannot go on like we are.

  Humanity is getting smarter, but more than that they are getting more dangerous. A handful of times before humans in power have figured out that there are creatures of darkness pulling strings behind the scenes. History tells of those times as great wars and times of atrocity but in truth it was too many humans with too much power finding out about vampires. They rise up and they kill a lot of us; that is why there are so few old ones left and almost none that have lived more than a few hundred years.

  We have to find a way to be less dependent on them for food but also to not lose control. Each time Katherine has to cover a break in the Silence there is the risk of discovery, of an uprising, and with their weapons we would not stand a chance.”

  I nod slowly. I haven’t really thought about it. Having become a predator my nights so far have been filled with coming to terms with what I am, not with the import on the rest of the world or what might happen with it. It is a sobering moment for me, one of the first moments since I died that I give thought to anything beyond myself. Right then, I feel another brick fall in to place around my beast. I smile and Miranda brightens up, squeezing my hand where it rests on the table.

  “We had best get back,” Miranda suggests and I agree.

  DECISIONS

  Lily

  MIRANDA AND I RETURN IN THE MIDDLE of an ongoing conversation. Nothing seems to have changed while we were gone; Katherine is still standing in her little pose and Wolf is sitting in the chair with his feet propped up on the table. The only difference is Calhoun seems more upset than when we left.

  “Dallas, we cannot allow this to happen. No matter you think it is for the best!” Calhoun argues leaning forward as he speaks; he is practically on the edge of his seat.

  Wolf turns to look at him with cold, empty eyes.

  “I can’t let them burn us,” he growls. “That’s what I can’t let happen.”

  “Well by all means, let’s not let that happen either. Though I think I’ve been doing a right fine job of keeping that from happening without involving the death of several hundred people,” Katherine retorts.

  “I agree, there are much better ways than this to protect the Society,” Calhoun insists.

  Wolf just shrugs.

  Calhoun looks over at me with a look of obvious desperation; his eyes beg me for help. Miranda walks over and resumes her place behind his chair with her hand resting on his shoulder. Her presence seems to sooth him and he once more pleads with Wolf, “You can’t be indifferent to a loss of life on this scale!”

  “Yeah?” Wolf counters. “Price has to be paid. Someone’s got to do it.”

  “No, they don’t,” I interject. “This price is too high, there has to be a better way.”

  Wolf turns to look at me and I meet his gaze. I’m coming to terms with him right now, right in this moment I can feel the shift between us. I’m sure it’s all in my head but I feel empowered. He may not want me, not in the way I want him, but that changes nothing in the end. I can control this situation because I know how he thinks.

  “Finally someone with a lick of sense,” Katherine quips.

  “Katherine?” I ask.

  “Yes?”

  “Shut the fuck up.”

  Her eyes widen and for a moment I think she will retort a comeback or attack me but then she just smirks.

  “Well, kitty’s got claws, very well,” she settles back into her stance, waiting to see the outcome.

  Wolf stares at me, waiting too.

  “I’m not going to stand by and let that many people be killed,” I explain. “No matter what we are, that ain’t right. You know damn well he can’t kill that many that actually deserve it. He won’t be gathering up a bunch of rapists, murderers, thieves and what have you to kill. It will be some kind of mass slaughter and then what? What happens next, do we just start burning parts of the city down?”

  “Actually, that is part of his plan,” Katherine tosses in.

  “What?” I turn back to her.

  “Oh yes, did I not mention that? He plans to arrange a large tenement fire in the Tenbaum district, I assume he’ll have some lackeys around to make sure that anyone who gets out of the fire makes it back in.”

  The Tenbaum district, that’s where I grew up, down there we called it the projects. There are a lot of bad folks there but there are also decent ones. People who just had a bad break, who were born to the wrong parents, and ones who just need a shot to get out. They don’t deserve to die, no one deserves to die like that.

  “When? How do we stop it?” I ask.

  “Tomorrow night. As for how, well I would imagine some thrilling heroics and daring rescues. How do I know? Not my area of expertise.”

  I step towards her before I can stop myself; my urge to slap this bitch across the face is just that close to overwhelming. I stop myself and frown, looking over at Wolf who is still just staring.

  “Ideas?” I ask him.

  “If it is magic that he is casting, it is most likely that he won’t even be there,” Calhoun interrupts. “Contrary to all the fiction you see on TV or in books a magician does not have to be present to do this kind of magic. They can tap into it, one as powerful as Genosoa can at least. He has been dealing in death for a lot of years now so I would guess that he will have a gang of willing lackeys, young vampires,
who will set the fire and then capture anyone that escapes, kill them by throwing them back in the fire to make it easier to cover it up later.”

  “So we stop the fire? We save the lives, then what? He tries again the next night? That is not a winning scenario. Can we kill him instead?”

  “No,” Wolf says.

  “That would be very problematic,” Calhoun agrees. “He is not only surrounded by his own magic, his guards, and his wealth but he is very powerful in his own right. I have records of him having been completely beheaded and still he came back, which would kill most any other vampire I know. His ability to withstand damage is legendary in Society.”

  “Great, so that is out, then what?”

  “Well, when one is dealing with magic of this scale, there is most likely a window of time that it must be done in. I would imagine that if you can keep him from casting it, you will disrupt the plan for at least a decade or more depending on the particular event he is timing the magic to coincide around.”

  Great, that at least gives us some hope of pulling this off.

  “Wolf?” I plead again.

  He stares at me for a long time, I feel seconds ticking by but I would swear it is whole minutes but at last he nods. He’s in, good.

  “Do you know where at in the district he is going to do this Katherine?”

  “Not exactly no, he asked me to make sure the response time for the fire department is slow, wanted me to be prepared to deal with any blow back. If things like this are mishandled we could have Homeland Security down on us.”

  “Well that’s not helpful,” I frown thinking. “One last question. Why?” I demand, turning my full attention to Katherine. I want to know what her angle is, why is she doing this?

  “Why, what?” Katherine retorts as every eye in the room lands on her.

  “Why are you telling us? What are you gaining from this?”

  Katherine waves a hand airily around then for a moment I think I see something genuine in her as her posture drops just slightly.

  “You have no idea yet how hard it is to hold on to power in this Society,” she answers. “Sometimes you have to bet on a long shot. I heard about you and Griogar.”

  “You heard what?” How could she have heard anything about what went down with Griogar? That just happened earlier tonight!

  “Oh kitten, you have no idea how fast word travels. I have eyes and ears everywhere, there isn’t much in this City I don’t know about the moment it happens. You put Griogar in his place and he listened. That man doesn’t listen to anyone, he’d flip Genosoa the bird just to watch him splutter. You backed him down and put him in his place. You have power you don’t even know you possess and it’s not just because you’re Athene’s progeny.”

  My eyes widen again, that is also supposed to be a secret.

  “Oh don’t be surprised,” she continues. “You are one of the singularly worst liars I’ve ever run across in my entire existence. I’m sure by now most anyone with half a brain has figured that out.”

  “But how?” I mutter.

  “Oh really?” Katherine says with exasperation clear in her voice. “One, you slap the Regent across the room and he rolls over like a bitch. Two, Dallas here doesn’t bring you out to Society, matter of fact he refuses to see you at all from all reports. The man who thinks he’s a damn wolf wouldn’t leave one of his pups alone in this City for two seconds. Three, you put Griogar down, kick him out of his own backyard. Do I really need to go on?”

  Wolf chuckles from across the room so I turn towards him with a glare. He shrugs and I see Miranda hiding a smile behind her hand. I shake my head and let it go.

  “Well all right then, so you’re in?” I ask.

  “Oh no,” she says. “Violence is not my thing. I’ve done my civic duty.” Katherine turns and starts walking towards the exit. She pauses just before she is out of sight turning back towards me.

  “Just remember little cat, I did you a favor. In this world, favors are the only coin you will ever really have or need.” Then she is gone.

  “Well, that happened,” I say turning back to the group.

  “Miranda and I won’t be much help in the physical aspect of this particular challenge, either” Calhoun acknowledges. “Though I think I can be of some assistance in gathering information for you, I can probably figure out exactly where the event is likely to happen.”

  “I guess that leaves it all down to the two of us, Wolf,” I look at him and I still ache with desire for him, physically and mentally, I want him to love me.

  “Yeah,” he says Great, love that wordy man.

  “How long do you need to gather information?” I ask Calhoun.

  “I can let you know something early tomorrow night I’m sure.”

  “Well thank you. Wolf, we should be on our way.”

  Wolf rises and I start leading the way out but before I exit Miranda comes over and gives me a hug, pulling me into a tight embrace. I don’t respond for a moment feeling a bit shocked but then I gather myself and return the hug.

  “Be strong,” she whispers in my ear as she pulls back. I smile at her.

  “Thank you both,” I say again. “It’s been a real pleasure meeting you.”

  Parting words are exchanged and then it is Wolf and I alone trudging through the sewers back to the exit then to the City above. We walk in silence, which I’m sure Wolf likes, and I use it to gather my thoughts. Once we have climbed the ladder, Wolf slides the manhole cover back into place where it slams down with a clang. We both realize dawn will be happening in mere minutes so we hurry towards Athene’s. We walk for blocks before I stop and turn to look at him.

  “Never thought I’d be the hero type,” I say to him.

  He gives a half smile and shrugs.

  “It’s good to see you again.” Lame but that’s all I got, just a pale platitude to throw out there like a limp blanket across the void in my heart.

  “I’m sorry,” he says.

  I want to run into his arms so badly it is a physical need but instead I stand stiff. “You stopped me from doing something I’m sure I’d probably regret later,” I dismiss his apology. “I need to get back to Athene’s, I’m sure she’ll be worried that I wasn’t there for the driver to pick up and the sun’s almost up.”

  Wolf nods so we turn and start walking again. I had thought he would leave me at this point but then you never really know with him.

  “I didn’t want to drag you into this world,” Wolf offers after we walk a few more blocks.

  “Who is Luna?” I retort, cutting to the chase.

  He keeps walking even though I’ve stopped so I grab his arm and pull, spinning him around to face me. He looks down at the ground not meeting my eyes.

  “Who is she Wolf?”

  He shrugs.

  “Not good enough, I deserve better than this!”

  We stand in heavy silence, the rift between us now feels as wide as the Grand Canyon, I can’t see any way to bridge the gap, no way to achieve equilibrium between us. It feels like I’m teetering on the edge and I don’t know how deep this chasm goes but at any minute this crumbling edge on which I stand is going to give way and I’m going to go head long into the nothingness I feel below me. Anger pulses and mixes with jealousy as I’m fighting with the unknown then I lose it and swing. I hit him open handed but it spins him around and blood flies from his mouth. I really don’t know my own strength. He stands with his back to me, one hand on his jaw, I can feel him struggling with his own beast, pushing it down and controlling it. A low growl escapes from him as he wrestles but I let him have it, this fight is his own. He has to decide without my influence how he is going to deal with me. At last he turns and meets my eyes.

  “She’s my mate,” he says. “Amazon Queen, she is my true beta, the one who can run with me.”

  I close my eyes as each of his words cut me like a razor blade. I feel shredded; it is hard to focus my thoughts on something cohesive and all the while the fiend inside feeds on my
pain, pulling it in and becoming one with it.

  “Fine then,” I say and start walking.

  “Is it?” he asks.

  I spin on my heel throwing my hands in the air.

  “What choice do I have? Amazon Queen? Really? How do you suppose I compete? I get it okay, I’m nothing to you and it’s fine. I’m just a late night radio talk show host in a City full of shit, too bad for me I got pulled into the middle of the crap storm that surrounds you. We had our one night together, you got your jollies off, let’s move on down the road right? It’s obvious I’m not good enough for you!”

  I pour it all out turning each word into a dagger, stabbing at him, hoping that it does hurt him the way he hurt me.

  He steps back from my onslaught, his head down again. “No,” he grumbles.

  “No, what? No I wasn’t good enough in bed either? Or excuse me, in that dirty fucking alley? I wasn’t even worth the price of a cheap hotel or taking back to the cave was I? It’s fine Wolf, you got what you wanted. Don’t worry, I’m not vindictive, I’m not going to go run and tell your woman, just, just stay away, okay? Tomorrow night, we stop this shit then we go our separate ways, that’s it!”

  “You’re too good Lily,” he interjects.

  I stop. In any other man I would run them right over, those words from anyone else wouldn’t stop me but from him they halt me in my tracks. Everything around me goes still, the sounds of the City stop, the world just pauses. I look at him with his earnest eyes staring at me, willing me to believe him and god help me I do. I sag, the anger fades and now I just feel empty.

  “Too good,” I huff which turns into a chuckle. “First time in my life I heard that.”

  He stands there with his hands spread open before him, his eyes boring into me.

  “Believe it,” he says and oddly, I do.

  “You best be thanking Miranda the next time you see her,” I throw out, turning away to head for home. “If she hadn’t talked with me, you wouldn’t stand a chance.”