Cutting Loose

by Dash, Jayson

  Though her closet was neatly organized in groups like colors, outerwear, and ready wear, tennis shoes, heels, and pumps—she still found it nearly impossible to find anything to wear. She didn’t want to look like the next girl who was desperately seeking the attention of the most eligible bachelor in the club with her whore-like tendencies and an outfit that said “just fuck me already” written all over it. Truth be told she hadn’t had any sex since Carl and she never knew she could withhold several months without sex. Even thinking about the past three months of no sweat-drenching love making sex made her heart swell and yearn to be touched and caressed by a man with strong hands, strong muscles like he had been chiseled from marble and a boner that would make her lose her damn mind. If only it was that easy to find such a man in this world.

  She went through her closet for a good while until she came across the perfect outfit that wasn’t desperate for attention and gave some back; it was a white halter top with a black mini denim jacket over it to cover her arms and a pair of matching jeans that accentuated her slim, curvy figure. After throwing a pair of black boots, some perfume, she grabbed her purse and headed out of the door.

  It only took about twenty minutes to reach Larissa’s place over in Coral Gables. She got out her car with the autographed copy of Fabulous for Larissa and stared at the stars for a moment. She wondered what it would be like to make love on the beach under a sky full of stars like they do in the movies. That was one of her many fantasies she had with her ideal man—if she ever found him. She once thought Carl was but once he started cheating on her and lying about stupid shit, the realization that he was nowhere near her ideal man came and bit her right on the ass. Hell, she would probably have more luck if she became a slut like Camille and lost all her self-respect. But then again, she had more sense than Camille to let herself get that desperate.

  She walked up the driveway and saw a car that she didn’t recognize and figured Larissa was having company over or she had bought another car for no good reason. She knocked on the door a couple times and a moment later Larissa appeared at the doorstep wearing a big smile as always and just the right amount of foundation on her already pretty round face.

  She opened the door fully and damn near screamed her lungs off. “Oh, my God, Sabrina! You actually came!” She pulled her into a tight embrace. She looked over her outfit and said, “Damn, and you actually followed my directions and dressed flawlessly in black and white. I’m so proud of you.”

  Sabrina chuckled and waved her off. “Yeah, yeah.” She gave the magazine to Larissa and watched her go crazy.

  “Holy shit, you actually got an autographed copy?” her eyes looked like they were going pop out of their sockets. She scanned through the magazine and got excited all over again.

  “It was nothing,” boasted Sabrina. “All I had to do was make a few calls and that’s about it.”

  “Thank you, Rina,” said Larissa, hugging her all over again and dragging her into her beautifully decorated abode. Larissa led her through the grand entrance and into the living area where her lavish furniture sat in front of a blazing fireplace.

  Cassandra jumped up from one of the couches and ran into Sabrina’s arms. “Hey, girl! It’s so good to see you.”

  “You, too, Cassandra. You look good.”

  “I try, I try,” she said coolly. “It’s hard hitting the gym two times a day four times a week in the middle of my busy schedule, but it is well worth the prize.”

  “It sure is.” She paused and said, “It’s been a while though since I last saw you. Tell me you’re not still playing matchmaker?”

  “You know she is,” interjected Larissa. She plopped down on the arm of the couch and said, “Her crazy behind tried to hook me up with some ugly-ass dude from Alabama with stank-ass breath that made the hair in my nostrils burn!”

  Sabrina and Cassandra exploded with laughter.

  “Whatever happened to you and that Freddie guy that you were dating a few months ago?” asked Cassandra.

  Larissa scoffed. “I had to drop that bad habit. He was lying and cheating and I got tired of playing around with him. Shit, I deserve better than that sorry excuse for a man—he was a punk ass momma’s boy with no spine.”

  Cassandra turned to Sabrina and asked, “Speaking of momma’s boys, what’s going on with you and Carl?”

  “That relationship ended a long time ago—didn’t I tell you?”

  “What?” exclaimed Cassandra in disbelief. “Why, what happened?”

  “In short, he ran off with Jasmine Phispatrick on our two-year anniversary and now they’re getting married.”

  “Oh, you poor thing,” exclaimed Cassandra, giving her a tight squeeze. “That sucks. But don’t worry, your girls are here for you and we got your back.”

  Sabrina laughed. “Actually, I’m fine.”

  Cassandra and Larissa exchanged empty looks and stared back at Sabrina. Larissa said, “Last time you said that you were in a jail cell with a DUI.”

  Sabrina sighed heavily, shaking off the memory. “In my defense, that wasn’t really my fault. I wasn’t even drunk.”

  “Right,” said Larissa sarcastically. “Nobody told you to drown your sorrows in a bottle of wine in the middle of the night for Carl’s lame ass.”

  “That’s not even the whole story.”

  “You don’t have to tell a lie, Rina,” said Cassandra. “We are your girls and you can tell us anything. But anyways, that’s in the past now just like college. Time to move on to the next one.”

  “Yes it is,” said Sabrina. “Speaking of moving on, who are you dating these days?”

  “Sadly, nobody yet. I was getting hot and heavy with this one guy I met at a wedding but he claimed things weren’t working out because I spent too much time at work and not enough time with him and I wouldn’t give up my golden egg to him.”

  Cassandra and her crazy ass celibacy thingy. One minute she was banning any man from her life and in the next she was back in the sack after only a couple of weeks. The girl was a mess and Sabrina loved her anyway.

  Sabrina stood and announced, “It’s been a long week and I’m ready to get wasted like my name is Paris Hilton!”

  ***

  “See, I told you this place was dead,” Sabrina complained to Larissa after they had went to a hip-hop nightclub on the beach. They had been seated at the bar for the last fifteen minutes to see if anything might change, but to no avail, the vibe in the club was nothing spectacular as Larissa claimed it would be. It was worse than showing up at a high school party before all the cool kids showed up; no one was dancing and the music was mediocre at best. And the over-priced, watered-down drinks? Laughable.

  “Just wait a while and it’ll get better.”

  “That’s what you’ve been saying and I’m ready to call it a night.”

  “I second that notion,” Cassandra said, sipping on her apple martini in small gulps. “This place sucks.”

  “Juts trust me. It will liven up in a little while. Have a drink and unwind a little. I know it is boring now but once the DJ puts on some good music, it’s going to be on and poppin’ in this bitch.”

  “Let’s hope so.”

  Sabrina took Larissa’s advice and ordered several lemon drops to mellow her nerves so she wouldn’t be so anxious to leave without doing much of anything.

  By the time she finished her fourth drink she was feeling a little buzz from the liquor but she wasn’t drunk and was far from it. Too bad she couldn’t say the same for Larissa as she downed her forth shot of Patron and hit the dance floor. That’s when the music quality became more enhanced and the crowd began to get bigger and more restless thanks to the music being blasted over the speakers and the lights changing colors.

  “Ooh, Rina this is my favorite song! Come dance with me,” chided Cassandra as she slid out of the chair and almost stumbled on her skinny legs.

  “Nah, you can go ahead. I’ll wait until they play something better.”

  Cassandra was
determined not to hit the floor with someone other than herself and out of nowhere some guy walked up to her and asked her to dance and of course she took the bait and joined him.

  That was unfortunate because just as soon as she left Sabrina’s bladder started going haywire and she had to use the bathroom really bad. But she was not feeling that idea too much because she was not about to lose her seat and have to stand up all night against the wall. So she figured she would wait until the song ended and Larissa or Cassandra would come back and take a break. She was sadly mistaken as five minutes turned into thirty minutes of eternity with a throbbing bladder ready to explode in any given second.

  She tried to cross her legs. Nope.

  “Fuck it,” she said aloud as she jumped up from her seat and made a dash for the restroom. All the stalls were occupied except one and she pushed and shoved her way to the stall, not even giving a damn how many females were cussing her out along the way.

  Once she was finished, she washed her hands and checked herself out in the mirror and made sure her outfit was still on point before going back to the action. She was about to dance but she changed her mind when they played some slow song that just didn’t appeal to her. So she went over to the bar to reclaim her seat only to find some bony-looking chick had taken over her seat jut as she figured would happen.

  She tried to be polite when she said, “Excuse me, but you are in my seat.”

  The bony chick spun around and snapped, “Well, I guess that’s too bad isn’t it?”

  Sabrina was about to lose her cool and when the chick spun back around as if Sabrina wasn’t standing there, that set her off. Sabrina tapped her on the shoulder and said, “I’m only going to say this to you one last time—you are in my seat, now raise up!”

  She smirked and said, “Oh, really, bitch? Make me!”

  “Ladies, ladies calm down,” interjected some random guy who was making his way to the dance floor but stopped in route when he saw them. “It’s just a chair. Matter of fact, you can use mine,” he said to Sabrina coolly, pointing to an unoccupied chair a few feet from where they were standing.

  “You real lucky God just answered your prayers and rescued your bony ass!” hissed Sabrina before leaving. What was this? High school? She couldn’t believe she let herself get worked up over a chair. Must have been the lemon drops kicking it with that liquid courage.

  She tossed her purse onto the counter as she plopped onto the stool. Not before long the same guy whom somewhat saved her from giving a beat down out, came walking towards her.

  Her blood pressure was already on the rise and she didn’t need any more drama for the night. Before she had the chance to say anything back she instantly recognized him from the grocery store—the same guy who gave her his business card, in case she wanted to talk. Of course, she never called him back because she had purposely forgotten all about him.

  “Sabrina Evans, right?” he asked he moved closer to her and studied her face.

  She turned to face him. “So, you’re stalking me now?”

  When he cracked a smile in the dimly lit area, Sabrina could still see his pearly whites and dimples she thought were sort of cute…

  “Now why would I do that?”

  “I don’t know, you tell me.”

  He chuckled. “You don’t believe in fate? Maybe we were meant to meet up again.”

  “No, not really.” She paused and added, “But I do believe in coincidences. But I told you before—you’re just not my type.”

  He leaned against the counter and said, “Why? Is it because I’m white?”

  In spite of herself, she leaned in close to him and took in the smell of him—his cologne smelled amazing; the perfect combination of Polo and…man. “You and I both know I would be lying my ass of if I said it wasn’t.”

  There was a twinkle in his kind eyes. “Okay, I can live with that. What else?”

  She looked him in the eyes and said, “As I said before, I don’t know you.”

  “We can do something about that right now. What do you want to know about me?”

  Up until that very moment, she really thought he was being a jerk and was just as desperate as the next guy to get in her drawers. Frat guys did it all the time, and not too long ago she would have fell for it and followed him to a bathroom stall. She felt a good vibe from him that told her he wasn’t that type of guy, and even if his skin color wasn’t the same as hers, he was nowhere near the type of guy she usually dated in her comfort zone. In the back of her mind, she knew how her mother and some of her friends always forbade interracial relationships because they cause too much conflict and they never work out.

  She pushed her thoughts aside and said to Brett, “First of all, are you straight, gay or bisexual?”

  He laughed his ass off and replied, “Damn, you’re straightforward aren’t you?”

  “I can’t help it—it’s in my nature.”

  “Trust me, I’m straight as an arrow.”

  “Are you single with a decent job and no mini-me’s running around with different baby mommas?” Sabrina was dead serious with her assault and by the look on his face, Brett could handle a girl who knew what she wanted in a man.

  He cleared his throat. “I’m one hundred percent single, employed, and I don’t live at home with my parents. And as far as I know, I don’t have any kids.”

  Sabrina thought about it and hesitantly asked, “Have you ever dated a black girl before or ever dated outside your race?”

  “Actually, yes, I have. They didn’t last long because certain people got in the way of our happiness but that’s irrelevant. Have you ever dated outside your race before?”

  She swallowed hard, trying to figure out if she was ready to answer such a question. She didn’t see a reason to lie to him and answered nonchalantly, “Technically I have.”

  Brett laughed so hard his chest shook. “Technically?” he repeated coolly. “How can you ‘technically’ date someone?”

  She couldn’t believe herself when she giggled like a little schoolgirl. “Well, see what had happened was, this guy that I dated during my freshman year at Columbia was mixed with black and Mexican. So technically, I think it should count for something. But he’s been the only one…so far.”

  “Interesting.” He paused to take her in with his eyes and said, “You have a beautiful smile.”

  “Wow, I’m flattered.” Sabrina knew she was smiling from ear to ear as. She was about to say something else when Larissa and Cassandra both came over to where she was sitting and interrupted everything.

  Larissa, in her obnoxious drunken state, noticed she wasn’t sitting alone and said, “Oh, God, do not tell me you’re giving up on the black guys already.” She clicked her tongue and said, “Sabrina, just step away and walk away while you still got your dignity.”

  Cassandra opened her mouth to chime in as well. “He is so cute!” She turned to Brett and asked, “Do you have a twin brother, and if so, can I meet him?”

  Brett loved the attention he was getting and said to Cassandra, “Nah, I don’t have a twin brother. Sorry.”

  “That sucks,” sulked Cassandra.

  “Do you want to do dance?” Brett asked Sabrina, despite Larissa talking to herself and Cassandra staring at him as if he was naked.

  “Sure.” She didn’t know why she answered so quickly. Probably because she wanted to get as far as she could from Larissa and Cassandra before they could say anything embarrassing to themselves or about Sabrina for that matter.

  They moved to the dance floor and began dancing to a slow song. Sabrina couldn’t help but lose herself to the lyrics as the chorus reminded her of Carl.

  Sabrina knew she was dead wrong for even thinking about Carl in the first place but she felt extremely discomfited thinking about an ex in the company of another guy who she was starting to like in more ways than she was ready to admit to herself.

  She convinced herself that she had to move on and stop letting memories of her and Sean invade h
er thoughts. That told her right there that he was not worth all the nights she spent crying and blaming herself for what? Not a damn thing. That bastard was nothing but old news as afar as she was concerned.

  “You must like this song a lot,” Brett screamed over the loud music into Sabrina’s ear.

  “Yeah, you can say that,” Screamed back Sabrina, “I can relate to giving your all in a relationship and wanting to be there for my man.”

  After several songs, Brett leaned in and asked, “Do you want to sit down and rest your feet?”

  Sabrina considered his offer but realized it was getting pretty late and she needed to head back home.

  “Actually, I have to go round up my girlfriends so I can get out of here. I have to go to work tomorrow bright and early.” If she was living back on campus she would have gave in to his request. Unfortunately, her bills weren’t going to pay themselves and her mother was going to make sure she showed up on time.

  “Aww, come on,” pleaded Brett. “You can’t hang for a little while longer? How about one more dance?”

  She couldn’t resist his pleading face and succumbed to him. “Okay, fine. One dance and that’s it.” She could practically hear her mother’s nagging voice in the back of her mind.

  Momentarily the DJ came over the speakers and announced, “I got another slow jam coming up for all the sexy single ladies in the building.” The music slowed down to a Chris Brown song.

  Brett pulled her body close to his, despite the scared look in her eyes when he gently placed his hands around her waist. “I love slow songs,” he whispered into her ears.

  Sabrina put her arms around his neck and looked into his beautiful green-eyed gaze. For more than one reason she was beginning to lose herself in the music and the way his looks had her thoughts on fire.

  “I love slow songs too,” she managed to whisper back, catching a whiff of his enticing cologne one more. He had no idea the effect it was having on her. Who knew she could feel this way about a man, especially one she had always was told was taboo growing up.

  Not too long after, they swayed to the melodic sound coming from the speakers and to Sabrina; it seemed as if it was just the two of them dancing. She was surprised when Brett slowly slid his hands from her waist to her ass and gave her a soft squeeze with his firm hands. She couldn’t help but like the way his body felt pressed against hers and the warmth of the heat between them.