Cutting Loose

by Dash, Jayson

  “Rina, honey, please come to dinner tonight. I made your favorite: curry chicken and yellow rice—and I want you to try this new bread pudding recipe I found. Please call me back when you get this message. ‘Bye.”

  A part of her wanted to say to hell with her mother’s dinner, but another part of her felt bad, seeing as she hadn’t seen her mother in a while and she probably would have gotten worried if she didn’t show up and start thinking of the worse things that could have happened to her “favorite” daughter.

  She loved her mother to death, but most of the time she was always trying to get Sabrina to open up about her love life and put in her two cents about every single thing. And her little get together dinners were only a front to dig her nose into Sabrina’s personal things.

  Surprisingly enough Sabrina still hadn’t told her mother about what happened between herself and Carl just for the simple fact that she didn’t want to hear her mouth about little things that would later on piss Sabrina off, leading her to say something she would later grow to regret thanks to her mother’s manipulative ways that only Camille could stand up to and sometimes even Sean had to get to escape from it all.

  “Hi, Mom,” Sabrina said after she called her mother back some minutes later after listening to the message. “I might be able to make it to dinner tonight.”

  “Praise the Lord!” shouted Sabrina’s mother in excitement. “I am so glad you decided to come. I haven’t seen you in ages, honey. Well, the food is already done so just come on over around seven-thirty.”

  “Okay. That sounds good. See you later then. Bye.”

  Sabrina should have known what she was getting herself into once she made the commitment to her mother to come for dinner but since she was a woman of her word, she was not about to back down.

  After dressing in a crème-colored blouse, a brown skirt and matching heels she checked herself out in the mirror, threw her purse on her shoulder and headed out the door.

  It was a good thing her mother only lived about twenty minutes away in Boca Raton and Sabrina was in a good mood to drive, otherwise it would have been a long, boring drive. Once she passed the security gate and passed the many rows of Tudor-style houses, she pulled into the driveway of the estate-like house where her mother and stepfather Sean called home and parked her car. She could see Camille’s red Infiniti parked near the garage next to Sean’s black Acura M45 and her mother’s crimson Lexus convertible.

  It was hard to believe that her mother was a multi-millionaire because the way she chose to live in a nice neighborhood instead of moving to Star Island on South Beach like most of the rich people did. But that was one of the things Sabrina admired about her mother—she wasn’t like everybody else.

  Before Sabrina could even get out of the car, her mother Dorothy came running outside dressed in a flowing royal blue top over a pair of loose fitting khaki pants and blue heels.

  Sabrina could tell she was pulling out all the stops tonight, just for the fact that she was wearing high-heels, which she swore she hated because they made her feet swell up like an elephant trunk.

  Before Sabrina could get even get out of the car her mother was all up in the car yapping her mouth off. “Hi, baby! I missed you so much. How have you been?”

  “Mom, can I get out of the car, please?”

  Dorothy backed up and said, “Oh yeah, of course. Sorry.”

  Sabrina took her slow, sweet time getting out of the car and hugged her mother. Once out of her tight bear-hug-like embrace, Sabrina’s mother led her inside her huge living area that was rarely ever used and lavishly decorated in posh, luxury furniture that was just for show.

  She then led her to the enormous family room with burgundy walls and matching sofas, a large coffee table and a mahogany entertainment system for the big flat screen TV sitting in the middle of it all. The walls were a host of family portraits from over the years, which was her mother’s pride and joy.

  Before Sabrina had a chance to even think about sitting down, Sean came from the kitchen and announced, “There’s my girl.” He wrapped his big, muscular arms around her and asked, “How have you been?”

  “Didn’t you just seem me what, two hours ago?”

  Sean chuckled. “Yeah, I sure did. It doesn’t seem that long ago though.”

  She could smell Camille before she even appeared.

  “To me it does,” Camille said as she pranced her way into the room dressed in a hideous outfit she thought she was looking good in but was mistaken big time. She stood next to Sean and said to Sabrina, “I love your blouse.” She paused and asked, “But didn’t that go out of style last season?”

  “Yeah,” said Sabrina coolly. “Just like that knockoff Gucci purse along with those fake boots? I know what the real ones look like because they went out of style what, last year?”

  Camille rolled her eyes and responded, “I don’t wear fake stuff. So whatever.”

  Sabrina’s mother stepped in and said, “Oh, girls stop it. Don’t you two argue enough?”

  “Apparently not,” added in Sean. He looked at Camille and said, “Don’t I pay you well enough to be able to afford real designer clothes?”

  “Yes, Daddy, you do. But why are we so focused on me? Sabrina is the one who got dumped by her black Prince Charming.”

  “Say what?” Dorothy turned to Sabrina and her eyes grew big like an owl. “Don’t tell me it’s over with Carl.”

  Sabrina wished she could have slapped the hell out of Camille for opening her big mouth. Now she had to hear her mother complain about how she was never going to bless her with any grandchildren anytime soon because she lost the best thing she ever had and then tell her how much she loved Carl like he was a part of the family already. And then she was going to have to listen to Camille brag about how good-looking Carl was and how she would never find anybody like him.

  “You know what, Camille? I don’t appreciate you telling my business to everybody. So what if I broke up with Carl two months ago and he is getting married. I could care less.”

  Stunned, Dorothy placed her hand on her chest and gasped, “Wait—two months ago? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Because I didn’t want you to know. I knew how you were going to react.”

  “My goodness, Rina.” She placed her hands on Sabrina’s shoulder and asked, “Well, are you okay?”

  “Yes, I’m fine.”

  Sean chuckled and said, “I’m glad to hear you finally got rid of that loser. You deserve so much more.”

  Dorothy nudged Sean playfully and said, “Sean, please. I adored Carl. He seemed so nice.”

  “Yeah, in the beginning he was until he started showing his true colors and started cheating on me behind my back. But hey, I’m so over him.”

  “Are your sure about that?” Sean quizzed. “Last time you said that was when you caught him trying to make a move on one of your friends and you broke it off, only to get right back with him.”

  “Yes, I am one hundred percent sure this time.”

  “So what happened this time?” Dorothy asked with anticipation in her face, which was wrinkle-free.

  “Ugh.” Sabrina sighed as she plopped onto the sofa. “Do I really need to get into this right now?”

  “Yes,” interjected Camille.

  “No, you don’t,” Sean intercepted. “Some things are private.”

  “Gosh, you are such a big baby,” said Camille snidely. “When are you ever going to grow up?”

  “You know what, Camille?” Sabrina started to say as she stood up and moved close to Camille.

  Sean intervened and said, “I could use some fresh air.”

  “Daddy, when are you going to stop taking her side all the time? You never do that for me.”

  “Aw, is that a tear drop I see forming in the corner of your eye?” teased Sabrina.

  “Okay, girls, I think that’s enough,” Dorothy said as stepped between them. “Can you go check on the bread pudding for me? Thank you dear.”

  �
�Sure,” Camille said, with a fake smile. Rolling her eyes, she stalked off toward the enormous kitchen.

  Once Camille was out of sight, Dorothy asked, “So, how’s my baby doing?”

  Sabrina already knew that she was referring to the fashion magazine she started and recently retired from; the same company that Sabrina had managed to get an amazing position that was the envy of the dozens of jobless college grads she still kept in contact with. “It’s pretty good, considering the fiasco from last issue. Sales are still strong, and I saw another magazine trying to steal our ideas for a future cover but I guess it happens when everybody wants to be like Fabulous.”

  Dorothy laughed. “That’s true. You know we have the set the standard. I was thinking about updating our brother magazine because everyone is comparing it to Esquire. What do you think, Sean?”

  “I think it’s a great idea just as long as we have the right people on board. I could use some fresh air right now. Sabrina, do you want to sit on the deck with your old man?”

  “Sure.” She couldn’t stand another minute talking about work, and since getting a glass of wine was definitely out of the question, fresh air was the next best thing.

  Sean gently took Sabrina by the arm and led her outside to the patio overlooking a huge swimming pool, Jacuzzi and a large yard full of manicured green grass.

  They sat down and enjoyed the starlit sky with the cool breeze flowing past them.

  After a moment or so of silence, Sabrina broke the silence and said, “This is nice. Too bad it can’t always be like this.”

  “I know exactly what you mean.” He paused and said, “That Camille is something else. I think she’s still upset about what happened last week.”

  “Oh, gosh,” sighed Sabrina heavily. “I am so way passed that. But I think it’s deeper than that.”

  “Really? How so?”

  “She’s feeling threatened, as if I might take her job from her. After all, I do most of the work nowadays and all she does is bitch and complain when she something doesn’t go the way she wants it to.”

  “I’ve noticed that too. But you can’t blame her for being threatened by you. Hell, if I were her, you’d threaten me too. Between me and you, if she doesn’t straighten up her act, she might find herself looking for another profession.”

  Sabrina turned to look at Sean. “You would do that? Not that I’m feeling sorry for her or anything. I just figured that since she’s your daughter and all. Well, you know.”

  “Yeah, I know what you mean. But think about it, she never wanted to work for Fabulous and the only reason she does is because of your mother.”

  “Yeah, but my mother isn’t the chairmen anymore and doesn’t control anything; you do.”

  “Yeah you’re right about that,” said Sean. “I just don’t want to see her out doing something ridiculous.”

  “Sean,” Sabrina said, looking Sean directly in the eyes, “Camille is a grown woman with a college degree—I’m sure she’ll be fine on her own.”

  He waited a beat and said, “Sabrina, sometimes you are too smart for your own good.” He chuckled and added, “I was planning on waiting a little while later on down the road to promote you to editor-in-chief and move Camille to another department.”

  Sabrina could just imagine the look on Camille’s face if and when she found out that Sabrina had been promoted to her spot when she least expected it.

  “That will be a sight to see.”

  They both exploded with laughter.

  Sean waited a beat and said, “Sabrina, you know you don’t have to call me Sean, even though you have been doing it for the longest.”

  “I know, I know. It’s just weird, you know? I’m just so used to calling you Sean. Don’t get me wrong, because technically you are my dad, but since I never got to know my biological father, it just doesn’t sound right.” She placed her hand over his and said “But you are the best dad ever.”

  He laughed and said, “Thanks. I try.”

  For a moment or so, Sabrina thought about asking Sean if he ever heard Sabrina’s mother mention anything about her biological father at all, since she never once told Sabrina who he was or what the real was behind him leaving her or if that was even what really happened.

  Before she could act on her thoughts, Dorothy came outside and announced, “Rina, honey, can you come inside for a moment?”

  “I guess you know what that means,” whispered Sean.

  Sabrina snickered and whispered back, “Yup. Time for ‘the talk.’ No sweat.” She gave Sean’s shoulder a squeeze before they both headed back inside. While Sean made a beeline for the recliner and glued his eyes to the football game, Sabrina followed Dorothy upstairs. Surprisingly, they ended up in Sabrina’s childhood bedroom—the same room that held so many secrets and late night rendezvous and phone conversations that went on all night.

  Her old bedroom looked just the same as it did when she moved out for college to stay in the dorms—the whole room was decorated lavishly in purple and pink furnishings, all coordinating to create a princess theme. Yeah, it was dorky, but to Sabrina it was the one place in the entire house where she could be alone and hideout. Her mother sat on the edge of the queen-sized sleigh bed. Sabrina slid beside her. The smooth, silk sheets were so inviting she almost wanted to lay her head back and fall asleep.

  She turned to Dorothy and asked, “So, what’s up, Mom?”

  Dorothy smiled, her face lost in nostalgia. “Oh, Sabrina. Where have the years gone?” She laughed softly. “I can still remember the day I bought this house. I don’t how you did it, but as soon as you saw this room you claimed it as yours. Camille was so envious of you because you beat her to it. Wasn’t there a boy who lived next door? He used to peep into your room all the time to see if he could catch you naked?”

  Sabrina laughed out loud. “Oh my God, yes. How could I forget Mitchell Baxter? He was so ugly, I mean even without the braces and the bad acne, he didn’t stand a chance.”

  “He tried though, bless his little heart.” She paused. “You know, I never really thought about all the sacrifices I had to make for you girls. Especially you, before Sean came into the picture. It must have been hard on you, huh?”

  “Hard would be an understatement. I remember the days of eating cup noodles three times a day, sometimes more than that. And that nasty ass government peanut butter. Yuck!”

  Dorothy laughed. “It just about killed me to eat peanut butter and syrup sandwiches to the point where I stopped eating anything involving peanuts, or syrup. Then I met Sean. He was my saving grace.”

  Saving grace? Sabrina laughed to herself. The man was a walking paycheck compared to all the other losers her mother got mixed up with when she was working at the strip joint. From the alcoholic to the gambler, to the chain-smoking asshole, Sabrina could remember just about all losers her mother brought home. She resented her mother a lot back then, especially the time her mother was working and one of her “customers” came to the house and tried to talk Sabrina into prostituting. All she had to do was kick him in balls and that taught him.

  Her mother was taking again. “God has truly blessed me.” She placed her hand on Sabrina’s and said, “Honey, I am so glad and fortunate that you didn’t stray and live the life that I had to. And I hope that someday you will have your own saving grace. You do believe in love right? Even after the crap you had to go through with Carl?”

  Sabrina thought about it for a second. And honesty, she didn’t even know how to respond without telling a lie. Carl was a sorry excuse for a man and she wasn’t going to let him ruin her perception of men. He took her kindness for weakness and she knew eventually, Karma was going to bite him in the ass.

  “I guess I do,” said Sabrina quietly. “Carl is only one man, right? There will be others.” Like Brett, she thought.

  “You are right about that.”

  By the time dinner was finished, Sabrina had completely lost her appetite. It was mostly due to the fact that she couldn’t stop
thinking about Brett. Her mother triggered something inside of her that made her question her own judgment and the way she had been going on for the past few months without Carl. She was stronger without him and she damn sure wasn’t falling apart without him.

  Yes. She was stronger without him in her life, making her believe that because he was the man in the relationship that he got to call all the shots. Hell to the no.

  Even though the food looked and smelled delicious, she made a plate and picked at her food, taking a few nibbles her and there just to keep Dorothy from hounding her with questions. Camille had the nerve to ask her if she had an eating disorder. Funny she should joke about a disease that she struggled with firsthand; sticking her finger down her throat just so she could be thin enough to look like the other rail-thin girls back in high school. Completely unnecessary and pathetic.

  She ignored Camille and made herself a plate to go. Once dinner was over, it was such a relief that Sabrina was free to go home and back to her own world.

  It wasn’t until she was cruising along the highway on her way back home that she heard a song on the radio that inspired her to stop being such a procrastinator and give Brett a chance. All in all, she was tired of her mother complaining about how good of a man Carl was and being compared to Camille’s dating lifestyle. She’d finally had enough and decided she was going to make it her mission to call Brett and go out on a date with him, no matter how much it scared her to death.

  Chapter Eight:

  Winner Takes All

  It started out like any other normal week but it was anything close to it. Maybe it was the refreshing start she had ever since she realized she was ready to go on a date with Brett, despite that fact that it had been a while since she went on an actual date. When Brett called her up out of the blue she felt a mixture of emotions building up inside her, most of all it was the anticipation of knowing that she was no longer going to spend nights alone in her bed pleasuring herself to sleep to some fantasy that was never going to become reality.