by Amy Brent
“My family is loaded. I’m just…moderately well off.”
“It looks like a little more than moderately.”
Lori just shrugged again before tucking her legs underneath her and leaning forward with an earnest expression.
“We aren’t here to talk about my house. We are here to talk about you and Sam. Come on, I want to hear everything.”
“I…don’t think so,” I said quietly, burying my nose in my drink once more. A silence fell between us for a moment before Lori started talking.
“You know, I’ve known Sam for a long time. Well, I’ve known Casey and Alice for a long time too. But Sam was the first one to really accept me.” She paused, taking a sip from her glass, and I looked over.
“Accept you?”
“We all went to the same high school. The three of them were close. Really close. They had this whole ‘us against the world’ thing,” Lori said, tucking a platinum-blond strand of hair behind her ear. “I was living in a different world than them, and honestly? I hated it. My parents were rich socialites and they expected me to be the same. Stupid parties. Stupid small talk. Stupid people always judging you. It was awful.”
I nodded, listening curiously. I had always wondered how they had become such close friends.
“Anyway, I went through this rebellious phase and I thought, who would annoy my parents the most for me to be friends with? So I started hanging around with Alice and the guys. At first Alice hated me, and I wasn’t that big of a fan of hers either to be honest,” she said with a laugh. “But I got it. They thought I didn’t belong with them. But Sam…he always accepted me just as I was. He always treated me like he did everybody else, and I think that’s what finally made Alice and Casey loosen up a bit.”
Lori shook her head, a small smile on her face as she reminisced. “And then when I got to know them, they were…the most real people I’d ever met. Everyone else in my world was so fake, and I didn’t belong there, not really. In that way, we were all the same, all part of the misfits’ club.”
Lori fell quiet again, and I remembered what Sam had said earlier when we’d been dancing together on the deck of that yacht.
“Sam told me you two went to prom with each other.”
Lori looked over at me. “Did he tell you why?”
“No.” I shook my head. “He just said it was a long story.”
Lori snorted and downed another shot of her drink. “Typical Sam. I was going with the star football player. So cliché, but we were both voted prom king and queen, and when Marcus asked me, I just said yes. I thought why not?”
I nodded, waiting for her to go on, and after a sharp inhale, she did. “Well, turns out Marcus expected more from me than I was willing to give him. He cornered me in the bathroom. If Sam hadn’t barged in, I don’t know what would have happened, but he saved me, and got a hell of a black eye in the process. He refused to let that asshole ruin my night, so he walked me out onto the dance floor and didn’t leave my side until I was back home safe and sound.”
Lori shrugged. “He’s always been Galahad.” I looked at her in confusion. “You know, the young knight out to prove himself, always unsure, but he would go out of his way to rescue someone who needed his help no matter how much it might hurt him.”
“Oh. Yeah, I guess that does sound like him.”
“Let’s just say I wasn’t at all surprised by his offer to help you with the threats, but…it’s more than that, isn’t it? For both of you?”
I just gave her a hopeless look, unable to answer either of her questions. I took a deep breath and held out my glass. “I think I need another drink.”
“A girl after my own heart,” Lori said with a laugh as she headed toward the kitchen. I thought of Lori’s story and everything Sam had done to rescue me.
“You know what?” I yelled from the couch, my stomach sinking with confusion and desperation. “You might as well just bring the whole bottle. I have a feeling I’m going to need it.”
*
Sam
I played furiously. My fingers were cracked and blistered, but I hardly felt the pain. It was nothing compared to the ache I had carried around in my chest since last night’s disastrous dinner with Faye.
The whole thing had gone…well, not exactly like I had hoped. I snorted at the understatement. Yeah, it couldn’t have gone worse if the boat had caught on fire and we had sunk into the bay.
I continued to play, hammering on the strings as if I could take my anger out on them, but they just rang out louder and louder as the melody grew more intense.
Casey and Alice weren’t in the studio yet. It was the first time since we had started recording the album that I was early, but I hadn’t been able to stay back at the empty apartment anymore. And it really had felt empty without Faye there to fill up all the spaces with her laughter.
The worst part was that I knew as soon as the contract was over, Faye would break up with me and move out of the apartment and on with her life. But everywhere I would look, I would still see her there, like a ghost haunting me.
She’d be in the kitchen, where she drank her coffee wearing nothing but one of my T-shirts. She’d be in the living room, where we’d sat on the couch arguing about the best movie from the eighties. She’d be in the bathroom, in the shower where we had—
I cut off the thought violently as I hammered against the strings of the guitar in my lap. Damn it. I knew it was going to be hell for me. I would never get over her.
Exhaustion rolled through me, pushing my anger even hotter as the music, hard and discordant, flowed from me.
I hadn’t slept a wink the night before. I’d been worrying about what had happened, and then later worrying about Faye when she never came back to the apartment. I had been sick with fear for her, and even now I couldn’t stop imagining all the terrible things that might have happened to her. What if her stalker had found her? Had hurt her? What if Faye was lying somewhere, alone and injured, because of me?
I was hanging on to the ragged edge of my sanity when Casey sauntered into the studio as chipper as a ray of sunshine, instantly making my anger flare.
“Where have you been? Have you seen Faye? Have you talked to her?” I growled. Casey gave me a hard look up and down as he pulled off his sunglasses.
“Jesus, Sam. You look like shit, man.”
“Did you hear what I said or are you deaf as well as fucking stupid? Have you seen Faye? Do you know where she is?” I knew it wasn’t fair, but there was nothing I could do to keep the anger out of my voice. My whole body was radiating with it.
“What the fuck? No, I haven’t seen her. And no, I don’t know where she is. You’re the one who’s married to her, not me. Although she definitely got the worse end of the deal there.”
“Fuck you,” I said, tossing the words at him short and sharp. Casey’s brows lowered with anger of his own.
I knew it wasn’t Casey’s fault. None of this was. I was just on edge and lashing out at anyone who was unlucky enough to get too close. I just couldn’t moderate my tone no matter how hard I tried.
“Hey, man,” I said, “just back off, okay? I’ve had a really shitty night.”
Casey just scowled at me, stepping closer until he was just a bare foot away. Way too close for the mood I was in.
“You want me to back off? You’re the one who had to go all white knight on her. No wonder Faye needed a break from you, especially if you treated her like an asshole—like you’re acting right now, if you missed my hint.”
“I said back off, Casey,” I said, shoving him more out of reflex than anything else as he leaned close in my face. He shoved me back, and we got into scuffle, my guitar falling to the ground in a jangle of discordant notes and feedback from the amp. I didn’t hear it though.
I also didn’t hear Alice’s shout until she was in between us, pulling me and Casey away from each other.
“Whoa! Break it up, you two. What the hell are yo
u doing?” Alice demanded, looking from me to Casey and back again. Finally I just shrugged, not offering any sort of explanation. Casey didn’t say anything either, just wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before stalking over to his drum set.
I was still so full of anger, I could hardly stay still. I paced away from Alice and her look of confusion and disgust. Even knowing it wasn’t Casey’s or Alice’s fault didn’t help to stem the flood of fearful anger inside me.
I just couldn’t stop thinking about Faye. I couldn’t stop picturing her hurt or worse, and that worry ate away at all the walls inside me until there was nothing there to protect me—or my bandmates. Everything inside me felt raw and open.
“Sam, what…what’s going on?” Alice asked softly, obviously fighting the more caustic words she wanted to throw at me. I just shook my head, refusing to answer. Casey snorted in derision from behind the drum kit.
“Don’t bother with him, Alice. He’s not fit human company at the moment. Not fit company for anything to be honest. What I’m trying to say is that he’s acting like a total asshole.”
“Yeah, I knew what you were trying to say, Case. I got that part, thanks.”
“Hey, I’m not the one who’s being a total douchebag here,” Casey said, throwing his hands in the air. Alice just rolled her eyes, letting out a harsh sigh.
I wasn’t in the mood to listen to their banter, to stand there and listen to them talk about me as if I wasn’t even there.
I had just opened my mouth to spew out all the anger that was brewing inside me when the door opened and Faye walked in. And just like that, all the tension inside me snapped like a cord being cut, both ends flying in opposite directions.
“Where the fuck have you been, Faye?!”
Chapter 27
Faye
My head was pounding as I got out of my car after blearily looking at the clock. I was an hour late. That wasn’t bad considering I had just woken up about twenty minutes before and had barely been able to move off Lori’s couch.
The woman must have had a hollow leg or something, because I could have sworn we were going drink for drink, but she’d been chipper this morning while I had felt like my mouth was full of sawdust and my stomach was sloshing around like the ocean at high tide.
I had to swallow hard at the image that appeared in my pounding head at the thought and quickly forced it away. I was already feeling unsettled enough. The last thing I needed was nausea on top of it.
I held my hand to my head, praying that the pain pill I took earlier would kick in before I had to talk to anyone. Hopefully long before I had to talk to Sam.
Nope. Actually, I just plain hoped I didn’t have to talk to Sam. The memories from the night before at Lori’s were a bit of a blur, but everything that had happened before that on the yacht was terribly, horribly clear. Every moment of it.
I still wasn’t sure what I was going to say to him, and that did nothing to help my unsettled stomach as I opened the door and walked into the recording studio.
“Where the fuck have you been, Faye?!”
I stumbled to a halt in shock as Sam’s words hit me like a bullet from a gun at close range. The impact was enough to send me ricocheting back a few steps as I stared at him.
“Wh…what? What are you talking about?” I managed to get out. Not my finest comeback, but I hadn’t been prepared for the blast from Sam and after getting black-out drunk and passing out at Lori’s. Neither my head nor my stomach really appreciated the overly loud words.
“I said where have you been?” Sam’s expression was just as hard as his voice as he stomped toward me.
Confusion hit me first, and I was still trying to process that as anger, pure and red hot, took over.
“Excuse me? What are you even talking—”
“How could you do that to me?” Sam said, cutting me off. I stared at him wide-eyed as he went on. “How could you be so reckless? I was freaking out when you didn’t come home last night. You wouldn’t answer your phone. You remember that you still have a stalker after you, don’t you? How could you be so stupid?”
“No,” I said, and Sam’s jaw dropped.
“No? What do you mean, no?”
“I mean no, Sam. No, I’m not going to do this with you. No, I don’t owe you an explanation. And no, I sure as hell am not going to stand here and take this from you. I don’t deserve this from you—not from anyone, but especially not from you!”
I was shaking with anger as I turned around on the heel of my boot and stomped out of the room. I stopped at the door, turning to throw a glare back over my shoulder.
“Don’t you dare follow me, Sam. I’m serious. I don’t want to talk to you right now.” That was the last thing I said before rushing from the room and down the hall. I could hardly handle a regular conversation at that point, let alone an argument with an irrational Sam.
Everyone was staring after me, Sam, Casey, and Alice, but I didn’t care. Sam may have been furious, and maybe he even had a right to be, but no one had the right to talk to me like that. Not any one.
As I walked toward my makeshift office at the end of the long hallway, I couldn’t help but replay Sam’s words. I couldn’t’ believe he would say that to me. I couldn’t believe his accusations. More than that, I was really truly hurt by what he’d said.
And most of all, I was hurt that after everything, he still didn’t trust me. Not to take care of myself. Not to be strong enough. Certainly not to be faithful to him. I’d seen that more than enough times with Archer, and I hadn’t even shown any interest in the guy.
By the time I made it down the hallway, I couldn’t even draw a breath I was so furious, and the last thing I wanted to do was run into anyone else.
I let out a sigh of relief as I made it to my makeshift office without seeing anyone and rushed inside, slamming the door shut behind me.
I paced the small room, too wired to sit down and filled with too many emotions to make sense of any of them. One thing I did know with complete certainty was that things couldn’t go on as they had been.
If I had been stronger, if I had been able to resist Sam and the desire only he ever conjured within me, then maybe things would have been different. But there was no going backward. I’d made my bed, as the saying went, and now I was going to have to lie in it.
Or, well, moving to a different bed would actually be more accurate, but that was beside the point. The point was, there was no way I could continue to live with Sam. There was no way we could keep on going as anything besides client and agent. That was just the way it had to be.
There was only one thing I could do. It tore me apart inside, but I knew it really was the only way.
I would never compromise the band’s success, and it was obvious that was happening. They were unravelling, and the situation with me and Sam was only adding fuel to the fire. Hell, we were the fire.
Even knowing what needed to be done, I had to take several deep breaths before I could pick up the phone, and even still my fingers were trembling as I dialed the phone number.
“Faye? Is everything okay?” Lori’s voice echoed from the other end of the call, and the honest concern in the other woman’s voice nearly broke me. But I clung to my anger like a shield, using it to give me the strength I needed to open my mouth.
“No. No, it’s not okay,” I said solemnly. “Remember last night?” I did only vaguely. “You said you know the best divorce lawyer in the city.”
“Yeah, but…”
“Good. I need you to do me a favor…”
Lori listened on in silence as I explained what I needed from her. She was quiet for a long time after.
“Are you sure?” she finally asked, but she could hear the determination in my voice and I could hear the resignation in hers.
“I’m sure, Lori. It’s the only way.”
“If you say so.” She sighed. “Expect me sometime in the next hour then, all right?”
“Perfect. Thanks, Lori. I owe you.”
I expected her to say more or at the very least to try to argue with me, but she just offered a quick good-bye and then hung up the phone.
Slowly, I lowered my own phone, staring blankly at the wall. The only thing for me to do now was wait.
Every minute seemed to drag on longer than the last, and my patience was completely gone by the time there was knock on the office door.
Angrily, I wiped a rogue tear away, drawing in a deep breath as I tried to compose myself. I hated that I had let Sam in so deep, that I had let him get to me. I should have known better damn it. I should have known that a musician would always break my heart. Always.
The knock sounded again, and I drew myself up once more before throwing it open. I was expecting Lori with the divorce papers but was surprised to find Alice standing impatiently in my doorway instead.
“I don’t want to talk right now,” I said stiffly, but the surly singer barged right inside anyway.
“I don’t care,” Alice said, kicking the door shut behind her before crossing her arms over her chest. Her rounded belly was peaking out underneath her band T-shirt, but being nearly nine months pregnant didn’t do anything to make her look less intimidating.
“What the hell is going on with you and Sam?” Alice demanded with a hard stare in my direction. “I thought you had figured it out!”
“Figured what out?”
“That Sam is truly, madly, deeply in love with you. Like cuckoo crazy in love with you.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said on a ragged exhale. “He told me last night.” I tried and failed to keep the anger and bitterness and, worst of all, fear out of my voice. Alice just threw her arms up in the air in frustration.
“Than what the hell happened?”
“Honestly?” I started, not even sure how I was going to answer her, but as soon as I opened my mouth, it all came tumbling out and there was nothing I could do to stop it. “I…I can’t handle it, Alice. Not any of it. Not Sam. Not this stupid fake marriage. Not this stalker. Sure as hell not living together with him, being with him every moment, knowing we can’t be together and still falling—” I barely cut off the tirade in time. “I’m…afraid.”
