Were All Animals

by Mima

  “You know that’s not true,” Chase would attempt to reassure her, but it was clear that some resentment lay beneath the surface, perhaps not so much with him than from within the Telips family. He sensed there was a lot of comparison going on; Maggie was a good student, quiet, a hard worker and had a sweet disposition. Kelsey didn’t want a part-time job, despised school and was more bold, more vocal than her sister ever was; she wore revealing clothing, showing off her cleavage, displaying her smooth midriff or tight jeans or yoga pants that left little to the imagination. She spoke her mind, often abrupt, bordering on rude, but she didn’t care and sometimes, that was the problem.

  Chase didn’t want to go anywhere with her in public for fear people would think they were a couple. Some rumors were already swirling around town that they were having a secret affair, something that didn’t exactly help his position in the community. He suspected that this might’ve been a contributing factor for the dirty looks from local women, as if he were a sexual deviant, chasing after jailbait while married to a woman with three small children.

  Not that he was doing anything with Kelsey but he did enjoy her company when she stopped by the house. He appreciated that she often jumped in to help with the kids or household tasks such as unloading the dishwasher and folding laundry.

  “Your old lady wears pretty sexy underwear for being a mom,” Kelsey held up a pair of frilly panties one day as she folded a huge basket of clothes that were overflowing onto the floor. Neither Flora or his mom were there on that day, so he didn’t have to deal with their dirty looks when the brazen teenager arrived at the door on the cool, June afternoon. Not that their attitudes affected Kelsey; her original shyness long gone, she would coo over the babies, carrying them around as if it was second nature for her and although he originally was nervous of the idea, Chase had to admit that the boys loved her.

  “She’s not my ‘old lady’,” Chase corrected her from the other side of the room, where he was cleaning a smashed cookie from the curtain. Now that Leland was starting to walk, Chase always had an eye on his eldest son to make sure he didn’t rip the entire house apart or hurt himself in some way.

  “You are married to her right?” Kelsey asked, as she sat the panties down and pulled both twins into each of her arms as if they were merely a couple of grocery bags, momentarily causing Chases’ heart to catch in his throat, fearing she would drop one but they were fine. Chet was grasping a strand of her hair while Devin seemed fascinated with her left breast. “That makes her your old lady.”

  “I barely consider her my wife.”

  “Well, you got these three,” Her eyes glanced over all the children. “Obviously, you hooked up at least…twice, right?”

  Chase raised an eyebrow, his face tightened up. She seemed unaware that Devin was pulling on her bra strap and that Chet was sucking on her hair. A large blob of drool suddenly dropped on her chest and rolled down her cleavage. Kelsey glanced down.

  “Hey Chase, can you get that for me,” She glanced at her breasts. “I don’t want to put them down.”

  Past circumstances proved that the babies hated it when Kelsey put them down. Of course, past history also showed that Kelsey did almost anything to get close to him, tempting his desires, especially now that his sex life consisted of fast hookups with an older woman or at his own hand during his very short, morning showers.

  Grabbing the closest roll of paper towels - something he had in every room now - Chase cautiously wiped the drool off her chest. Reluctantly, he reached between her breasts to get the drop that was rapidly running into the hollow between her breasts. Feeling a twinge of arousal, it was quickly depleted when the door opened and Audrey walked in. Glaring at the two of them, Chase feared she would attack Kelsey but she didn’t say a word.

  Having already met the youngest of the Telips’ girls, Audrey perhaps caught on right away that unlike Maggie, Kelsey wasn’t intimidated by much and wasn’t sensitive to what made other people uncomfortable. Catching the reaction at the door, she merely shrugged and said, “Your kids sure drool a lot, Aud.”

  Rushing to the other side of the room to stop Leland from ripping the long curtains down from the windows, Chase barely caught Audrey rush over and rip both children from Kelsey’s arms. The babies were alarmed and immediately started to scream. Chet reached out for Kelsey as if he couldn’t bear to be removed from her arms.

  “You shouldn’t have them, what do you know about babies?” Audrey sneered and turned away.

  “I know how to keep them from crying,” Kelsey muttered and eased past Audrey, showing no signs of intimidation under her dark glares. “See ya Chase.” She breezily commented as she bent over to pick up her backpack, her breasts almost pouring out of her bra when she did so and it took everything in Chase to look away. Then she was gone.

  “Why was she here?” Audrey snapped and exhausted by the day, Chase ignored her question and grabbed Leland. With cookie smeared on his face, it was an excuse to get a washcloth in the bathroom to wash it off. His mind continued to go back to when he cleaned the drool off Kelsey, the soft noise she made when his hand gingerly wiped the clear substance, as her breasts seemed to rise a little higher as he did so, his desires rising at the possibilities.

  Pushing it out of his mind, he didn’t allow it to return until after dinner, while in the basement pummelling the punching bag that Harold had graciously given him after the gym closed; in fact, he helped Chase to install it, making sure it was secure before leaving, shooting back an apologetic look as he glanced at the three small children in the living room. It was clear he felt guilty over laying Chase off, but both of them knew it was unavoidable.

  It was his time in the basement when he could escape. Pounding on the heavy bag in the corner, all his desires and frustrations unleashed, flowing through his body, escaping through his pores of sweat, grinding through his muscles as he found relief with each attack on the punching bag. His breath released the intense desires that never were far away, his need to have a normal, physical relationship with a woman, rather than forced encounters with his wife or Flora, but a connection that was mutual and not just physical. He somehow missed out on that stage and wasn’t sure why. Either he really wanted someone who didn’t want him or vice versa. It was never on the same level but mismatched and minimal nutrition for a body that craved so much more than he was finding.

  Removing the gloves, he threw them on the ground and went to take a shower. The kids already in bed, Audrey was on the computer in the living room and they ignored each other as he went upstairs and closed the bathroom door. It was only in there that he allowed himself to think about Kelsey’s cleavage and give in to his longings, under the hot spray of the shower, as his hand worked rapidly to bring himself some pleasure.

  Drying off, he pulled on old sweatpants and a hoodie before returning downstairs, relieved that Audrey was now in the bedroom, he collapsed on the couch and glanced at the clock. His chest rose and fell beneath the blanket and his eyes started to drift shut when his phone vibrated. Assuming it was Kelsey, he was surprised to pick it up and see Maggie’s name show up.

  We need to talk.

  A sudden jolt of happiness flowed through him, his eyes suddenly wide open, he didn’t hesitate to hit ‘call’. Feeling the warmth of her voice on the other end, it took a minute to realize that she was pissed off.

  “Why are hanging around with my sister?” She finished the sentence as if talking about a rampant disease, rather than a family member and Chase felt defensive at not only his actions but also on Kelsey’s behalf.

  “What?”

  “I know you guys are spending time together and I don’t like it,” She was breathless, apparently walking, he could hear the anger in her voice. “She fucking 17 Chase, what are you doing?

  “Nothing,” his voice immediately sounded defensive. “Was this Audrey, cause-

  “It wasn’t Audrey, you know
I don’t talk to Audrey,” Maggie snapped and a loud honking in the background, along with voices and music flowing together only made him relieved to be somewhere quiet that night. “Everyone in Hennessey is telling my mom how Kelsey is always hanging around ‘that married Jacobs’ boy. One woman called mom tonight and said not to be surprised if Kelsey came home pregnant.”

  “Well if she does, it wouldn’t be because of me,” Chase insisted, having a flash of his earlier fantasies in the shower and quickly pushed them from his mind. “Come on, Maggie. You know me better than that, I’m not doing anything with your sister.”

  “Then why is she suddenly hanging around you?”

  He didn’t know how to reply truthfully. He hesitated, which seemed to increase Maggie’s suspicions.

  “Seventeen, Chase and barely that,” Maggie snapped.

  “I didn’t touch her,” Chase insisted. “Look, she started to come around the gym, I think she’s just a lonely kid, it’s nothing.” He hurriedly explained.

  “A horny kid is more like it,” Maggie snapped. “Keep away from her, Chase. She’s trouble.”

  The call ended. Chase felt a chill cover his body and as he sat the phone down.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Chase could only remember going to the reserve once when he was 7 or 8. His father insisted that it was ‘nowhere for a child’; the very provocation Louise Jacobs needed to break out into a fury. This was frequent when he was a kid, hardly the demure and comforting woman she was with her grandchildren, her anger was like a volcano that would quickly explode at the drop of a hat.

  “You are ashamed of me and where I come from!” She shouted, while Carl Jacobs automatically pulled back and fell silent but Chase’s mother was only getting warmed up. Her eyes grew small as her face tightened into a chilling frown, causing her youngest child to hide under the table while Angel stood in the doorway with tears in her eyes. “You think we’re all trash, a bunch of dirty Indians with no morals, just animals!”

  Their father would never fight back no matter how insane their mother became. He would instead sit in silence, causing her anger to peak until she either threw things against the wall or fell into a heap on the floor, tears flooding her eyes.

  Chase wasn’t sure which scared him the most.

  The next day as they drove into the secluded area, Chase began to understand his father’s reluctance. Discovering generic versions of their own house, he immediately noticed one with a portion of the roof caved in and yet, didn’t he see young faces looking out the window? Did people live in that house? He remembered feeling sad and frightened at the same time. Why didn’t they live in nice homes like him? Why did a few of the houses have broken windows with discolored plastic replacing a portion of the missing glass? Weren’t they cold? How did it happen? Why didn’t they replace the windows? He wanted to ask his mother but remembered how angry she got when his dad brought up the topic the previous night and so remained silent.

  Stopping in front of a small house, faint yellow in color, Chase noted that the grass was much too long in the yard, a few wildflowers growing in the midst, almost as if attempting to rise above the blade of dry sprigs of grass that smothered them. He wondered why they didn’t cut their lawn and try to make it nice like people in his own neighborhood. Maybe their lawnmower was broken, he decided.

  In silence, he followed his mother out of the car and up the short step that looked to be roughly painted an unflattering shade of brown and chipping off, he ran his fingers over the paint and dry pieces broke up beneath them, falling to the ground. Just then, the door flew open and an overweight woman with glasses and long, straight hair appeared, her face had a gleeful smile; she didn’t hesitate to reach out and pull Louise Jacobs into a hug, giving her a quick kiss on the cheek.

  Her eyes quickly caught sight of Chase, who nervously fidgeted, unsure of how to react but feeling some comfort by the stranger. “Is this your boy?” The woman asked, her tone gleeful, excited as her eyes ran over him. His mother turned, wiping away a tear, she nodded and smiled. The stranger gave a warm smile and leaned forward. “Such a handsome little boy!”

  She ushered them both into the house, Chase immediately recognized the smell of toast, his eyes glancing to the right. An older boy sat in small room off of the kitchen - what appeared to be a combination of a bedroom and living room together - he glanced at Chase, appearing indifferent to their arrival, he stuffed some toast in his mouth and returned his attention to a small television set in the corner, a morning talk show was barely audible.

  Sitting with his mom at the kitchen table, Chase remained silent as the two woman started to talk about how long it was since they saw one another, apparently they had been childhood friends and lost touch through the years. Glancing around the small kitchen, that barely allowed enough room for a table and three chairs, he noted that it was cluttered, the cupboards full of containers and clean dishes piled to one side, as if there weren’t enough room to put them away. Then again, upon glancing at the limited doors on both the top and bottom, perhaps there wasn’t room.

  The floor was badly broken up, missing tiles were obvious next to the shiny, gleaming white vinyl squares that were left behind. The entire room was remarkably clean despite the compact area that hardly allowed his mom’s friend - he thought her name was Mary - room to move in the kitchen, searching the cupboard for a ‘treat for the boy’, despite his mother’s insistence that Chase was ‘fine.’ In silence, he watched her pull open doors that displayed generic foods, mostly mac and cheese and various noodles that his own mother often referred to as ‘garbage’ when Chase asked for them at the grocery store. He wondered why her friend thought this food was okay? Was his mother wrong?

  He noted her face was solemn as she again insisted, ’Chase is fine, right honey?’

  Chase nodded but reluctantly asked for a glass of water. His mother frowned and he wasn’t sure why but Mary seemed unaffected by his request, almost joyful as she pulled out a bottle from the fridge and poured a glass. She passed it to him and Chase noted how kind her eyes were, a huge smile covered her face and he felt at ease. “I got some yesterday at the store.” She seemed to be assuring Louise Jacobs. “If nothing else, I always make sure we have lots of clean water.”

  Suddenly feeling comfortable with the nice lady, his shyness momentarily disappeared, ‘How come you don’t use the tap like we do?” he gestured toward the nearby sink. Immediately, he sensed that he asked something bad, as his mother’s eyes swooped down on him like a fierce storm while Mary appeared unaffected.

  “Our water isn’t good here, Chase,” She calmly answered his question. “We have to buy it in the store.”

  “Oh,” he replied and although he wanted to ask why he could tell by his mother’s stone face reaction that he somehow stepped out of bounds. “Okay.”

  His mother’s mood seemed to lighten when Mary offered kind words to describe Chase and for a few brief moments, he secretly wished that she was his mother. He didn’t care if her home was kind of small and needed stuff fixed, he liked her and she was kind. Glancing toward the living room again, he noted that the older kid was watching him, his disposition was one of despair as he slumped over a pillow.

  It wasn’t until they got back in the car later and started to leave, that his mother yelled at him. “Mary is poor, Chase, couldn’t you see that?” Her words were ice cold, like a shard of glass that ran through is veins, he didn’t reply. “How could you be so stupid? They can’t afford water for themselves, let alone us. I told you before we left that I had some in the car if you needed it, why didn’t you listen?”

  He couldn’t remember her telling him that there was water in the car. Mary didn’t seem angry, so he wasn’t sure why it was such a big deal; but like his father, he decided to not say anything.

  Chase grew up feeling dumb. He didn’t do well in school and tended to daydream a lot, maybe that was because h
e wasn’t smart enough to listen. Other kids did well; Angel excelled in school but Chase didn’t understand a lot of things and sometimes, he didn’t really care either. He hated history. Math was stupid. Other than gym class, it was pretty boring.

  His parents had never seemed concerned with his grades, almost as if they expected him to not do well, his father praised him for excelling in sports, always a big kid, he was aggressive and intimidating. He often considered that was why he was so drawn to anything physical; his body always long, lean and strong. It was something that the world encouraged and so his marks, unfortunately, hadn’t seemed quite so important.

  Audrey always made him feel stupid. She laughed when he messed up something that he was apparently supposed to know; basic things in the news or in everyday life, things that often didn’t really interest him.

  “Good thing you’re pretty,” Audrey said gleefully as if he had nothing else to offer. “Cause you’re not the brightest bulb on the tree.”

  Chase acted indifferently but deep down, it bothered him that he wasn’t smart. For that reason, he started to make an effort to learn things. He would turn on the news, occasionally researching topics he didn’t understand on the Internet or turned on documentaries while around the house. Still, he was self-conscious and sometimes felt that perhaps it was better to keep his mouth shut and make people wonder if he was stupid, rather than speaking and proving it to be true.

  He often wondered if that was why Maggie stopped talking to him. Perhaps she hadn’t realized how dumb he was until moving away, to a city full of intellects that could talk about more than a limited range of topics. In a way, he hoped that was the reason and not simply because she no longer cared for or had forgotten him. Although, now that there were so many rumors swirling around about him and Kelsey, chances were good that she would be happy to never speak to him again.