Something Real

by Nellie Christine

  Come on, love, I’ll help you heal

  Baby, help me heal

  I’m looking for something real, real

  Come on, love, I know you feel

  Baby, like I feel

  That this is something real, real

  “He’s INCREDIBLE!” Oscar shouted, holding his drink in the air and swaying side to side.

  Eleanor was into the performance as she filmed – pointing her camera perfectly at the stage. Grayson could only smile. He couldn’t seem to look anywhere else.

  “I’m not the best rapper but we’re going to have a little fun with this,” Elijah said, knowing Mark would laugh him off the stage if he were here to witness this. He looked down at the floor at his lyrics and smiled a bit before beginning.

  Uh, check it

  I’ve had a change of heart, I want to be responsible

  If we can restart, then baby anything is possible

  Forget the money, forget the other guys

  I see something real when I’m looking in your eyes

  And I know what I said before, I know just how you feel

  Let’s fix this, though, so you can be Ricky to my Lucille

  Like Kobe and Shaquille, we can go back to back

  or you can leave by my lonesome like an old sad sack

  The crowd got louder cheering for him. Grayson was laughing. He made note to make sure Elijah never rapped again, but this had to be the cutest thing he’d ever heard.

  But deep inside, you know that you’d be doing what’s right

  so when this song is over, we’ll make plans for later tonight

  No, I can’t take you to France

  but I can take you to dance

  You’d change my life if you gave me a chance, so

  Come on, love, I’ll help you heal

  Baby, help me heal

  I’m looking for something real, real

  Come on, love, I know you feel

  baby, like I feel

  that this is something real, real

  He repeated the chorus again as the entire club clapped along to the beat. Grayson found himself doing the same. He couldn’t say that anyone had ever done anything like this for him before, and he was so happy that people were recording on their phones, because this was a moment that he wanted to capture forever. When Elijah finished, he bowed, waved at Grayson, and smiled at the crowd. The host came out with so much energy, helping everyone cheer him on.

  “That’s what we’re here for, people! That’s what this is all about.”

  “YAAAASS, King!” Oscar screamed, jumping up and down.

  Grayson felt an overwhelming sense of pride come over him as he watched the crowd’s reaction to Elijah. He passed the guitar back, picked up his paper, and then headed off stage.

  “Dude?!” Oscar’s smile was from ear to ear. “Aren’t you thrilled that I told him about tonight now?”

  Grayson still wanted to fight his bestie, but he couldn’t help but smile. “Actually, I am.”

  Eleanor turned to the both of them. She was speechless, but her face said it all.

  “I… I want him for myself, I think.”

  Oscar glared at her.

  Elijah stepped through the entrance from the stage and smiled. The others in their section were all clapping for him, and Grayson leant against the balcony as he approached. The host announced the next act, but nothing else really mattered after that.

  “Hey,” Elijah said, smiling as he stood in front of Grayson.

  Oscar and Eleanor weren’t trying to hide the fact that they were staring at them.

  “Hey,” Grayson replied. He smiled and shook his head. “I – That was incredible.”

  Elijah looked over at Grayson’s friends thinking that they’d look away if he did so. They only grinned harder. He ignored them, turning away.

  “I hoped you’d like it. I know it was silly, but you know. It was last minute’s notice.”

  “It was great.” Grayson shook his head. He was still having a fun time processing everything. “I’m at a loss for words.”

  Elijah felt himself blushing. He reached for his beer and gestured down to the show. “Want to watch the next performance?”

  Grayson wanted to say no. He’d rather go somewhere quiet and talk, or just look at him for a minute or ten. Or twenty. “Sure.”

  They ended up finishing up their beers while watching the rest of the show. Well, Grayson didn’t exactly finish his. He didn’t want to get carried away tonight, and he already couldn’t focus on many of the acts. There was one person that had gotten his attention because he was terrible, but other than that, Grayson was only paying attention to the side of Elijah’s profile as he drank what was left in the bottle. Sometimes, Oscar would say something to him, and they’d share conversation, but Grayson was so distracted that he couldn’t even eavesdrop to make sure that his best friend wasn’t ruining all of this.

  Whatever this was.

  He was still thinking about that song. And about being here with Elijah.

  “Can we go somewhere quiet?” he asked. A couple finished their duet and were walking offstage.

  Elijah seemed taken aback by the request, but confidently nodded his head yes, as if the answer wasn’t obvious. “Sure.” He slid the paper that he’d written the lyrics on into Grayson’s pocket and picked up Grayson’s beer. “I’m not wasting this, though.”

  Grayson patted the lyrics in his pocket and smiled.

  ∞

  They were outside five minutes later after a quick trip to the restroom. Elijah said he really needed to pee. Thankfully, the line wasn’t too long.

  Grayson fixed the beanie over his ears as the two of them walked towards the East River, looking across it to the view of Manhattan.

  Elijah was quiet, but his mood was positive. He had every reason to be positive, honestly. He had just performed a song that he’d written that night in a room full of music heads and they loved it. He performed a song for Grayson in a room full of music heads, and Grayson loved it. He was pretty much on top of the world.

  Grayson kept smiling to himself, and Elijah thought it was the cutest thing. Knowing that he was part of the reason that smile was there did something to him, too.

  “I think that you’re incredible,” Grayson said. “I can’t believe you.”

  Elijah crossed his arms and looked out at the snow falling. “I bet you regret breaking up with me now, huh?”

  “Both times,” Grayson joked along. He smiled at Elijah’s laugh. “I’m serious, though. I really want you to know you’re amazing.”

  “As long as you know you are, too.” Elijah smiled at him after he said it. They were silent, and after a moment, Elijah continued. “So how long before we move past this corny stage and actually talk?”

  Grayson laughed aloud. That much was true. They both were being a bit ridiculous right now. “You’re right. What have you been up to the past few days?” he asked. While he wasn’t sure he wanted to know in case his fears were right, he just wanted to break the ice and have a normal chat.

  Elijah shook his head as he thought about it. “There was a lot of thinking about you, honestly.”

  Grayson turned to face him.

  “Thursday night, I kind of hung out in my apartment trying to shake you. Friday night, I thought that maybe I’d be over it. I went out with my friends, found a guy I had every intention of fucking, but that didn’t work out.”

  “Why not?” Grayson asked. His voice was low, almost as if he didn’t want to hear the rest of this story, but the look on his face told Elijah otherwise.

  “Well, my dick was in somebody else’s mouth, and all I could focus on was how he wasn’t you, and how it didn’t feel right.”

  Grayson looked away after the answer. That was something he wasn’t expecting to hear, especially not from a guy like Elijah. “I thought you’d have moved on with your young, NYU flings, and that things were back to normal for you.”

  Elijah shrugged. “After that, I
hung out with my niece, Lily. Thought about texting you a lot, told myself to let you be. Long story short, we’re here now.”

  They smiled at one another. Grayson looked down at his folded hands and took a deep breath.

  “I’d been trying to distract myself with work, but I don’t know…”

  “But you missed kissing me?” Elijah asked.

  Grayson rolled his eyes, making Elijah laugh. He looked up at the skyline and continued. “I don’t know if it’s because you’re gorgeous, or because you’ve been fun to be around, or because of the sex… it could also be your voice. Whatever it is, you’ve been on my mind. And I may’ve…” he trailed off. “I can’t believe I’m about to say this.”

  Elijah’s eyebrows went up as he looked at him. “Go on…”

  Grayson sighed. “I found your Facebook and I – I looked through a few of your pictures. But that was it.”

  “Oh my god.” He laughed, sliding a little closer to Grayson with the smug air that usually engulfed itself around him. “Which pictures did you like best?”

  “We are so not discussing this,” Grayson said immediately. “And you are not going to make me blush.”

  Elijah laughed.

  “But, while we’re on the subject… who is that big guy with you in your profile picture?”

  “Oh,” Elijah shook his head. “Jim Jam. College roommate. He was always around because I had a lot of female friends on campus. A lot of the hetero males hung around me for that reason.”

  Grayson nodded. He had several of those. Every out guy was an accessory at NYU. Like a new handbag.

  “So did you see my picture on the beach? I was wearing those tiny red swim trunks –”

  “How about we change the topic altogether?” Grayson forced himself to look away as Elijah laughed. He knew exactly what photo that was, but that picture, nor his reaction to it, would be up for discussion.

  “Fine.” Elijah nudged Grayson’s shoulder with his own and smiled softly. “Let’s talk about the performances.”

  Okay. That was something Grayson could do. He looked away from Elijah’s tongue as he tried to catch a snowflake and down at the water. “I’d love to.”

  “So, you’re looking for an artist.” Elijah caught one on the tip of his tongue and licked his lips. “Did you find that person tonight? Oh! What was her name…?” he trailed off, looking over at the city. “Louise? Asian-American girl with the sultry voice. Eleanor seemed to dig her.”

  Grayson watched as snowflakes landed on his gloves. He shook his head. “I honestly don’t remember her. My brain sort of shutdown after you sang and … did what you call a rap.”

  Elijah laughed. “What I call a rap? Are you making fun of my Hip-Hop skills, Grayson?”

  “Is that what you’re calling it?” He quipped back, laughing along with him. “Seriously, it was cute, but don’t do that again.” He thought for a moment. Actually, Elijah could do it again because it was cute, but only for him. Not that Grayson was about to say it at a volume where anyone but himself could hear it.

  “Can I take you out?” Elijah asked.

  What?

  Grayson tensed. He licked his lips and looked back out at the water.

  Elijah watched him for a while before looking away as well.

  “I really don’t know about that,” Grayson answered.

  Twenty percent of Elijah was expecting a rejection, but he was hoping that Grayson would fall somewhere in that 80% that felt that they were on to something. They both admitted to thinking about one another over the past few days. They seemed to be having fun tonight. Grayson liked his song. What was the problem?

  “If I can be honest, I don’t understand,” Elijah told him.

  Grayson took a deep breath. “I’ve been beating myself up because you’ve been on my mind,” he began. “Despite how things ended in my office on Thursday, I haven’t really moved past that.”

  Elijah was waiting for the ‘but’ there. “Same here.”

  “I hate myself for it, though.”

  Ouch, Elijah thought.

  Grayson rubbed at his jaw. “And that’s because I know that I’d be giving you so much power to completely destroy me if you wanted to. That would be stupid of me.”

  “Grayson –”

  “You’re a great guy. I just –”

  “I’ll do it.”

  Grayson stopped talking and looked at him. Elijah was staring back – those brown eyes were bright in the moonlight and he looked as sincere as Grayson had ever seen them.

  Only Grayson had no idea what he was talking about.

  “You’ll do… what?”

  Elijah pushed the dark locks away from his face and moved a little closer.

  Grayson exhaled; his warm breath meeting the frigid air.

  “I’ll do it, Grayson,” Elijah began. “I’ll be your first artist.”

  Grayson was quiet at first, and Elijah was scared for a moment that he’d killed him. He waved his hand in front of Grayson’s face and smiled. “Earth to Peanut.”

  He smiled, but it was temporary. “No. I can’t have you do that.”

  “Don’t be stupid, Grayson.”

  “I’m serious,” Grayson told him.

  Elijah rolled his eyes. This man was going to be difficult all the time, wasn’t he? “Listen, you need an artist. You know I’m capable of being what you need, and I know what you’re going through with the people at your label and your dad. The thing is, if I do this, you have to let me take you on a date.”

  Grayson was stone-faced for probably an entire minute before he burst out in a fit of laughter.

  Elijah glared at him. “Really, dude? What’s the problem?”

  Grayson turned and leaned against the fence. “Remember our conversation when we first me? When I said hot guys can get you to make really ridiculous decisions?”

  “And you’re the hottest,” Elijah answered.

  Grayson looked at him. “The problem is that you went on a rant explaining to me all the reasons you’d be a terrible famous person, remember that? Oh, and –” his phone vibrated, and he reached for it, “I can tell that you really did not want to do this. You despised the thought. I would not make you do that. I’d rather you be happy.”

  Oscar:

  Don’t fuck this up.

  Grayson put his phone away.

  “I know what I said before, but I’d like to believe I’ve done a bit of changing in the past few days. Let me take you out tomorrow and prove that to you, Grayson.”

  Grayson wasn’t about to act like he didn’t want to go on a date with this guy. He would’ve loved to go on a date with this guy. It was just… everything.

  “Regardless of how things turn out, I really want to help you with this show for The Pretty Committee. It won’t be anything extra. Just a date. I’m not trying to get you in bed again – I swear. Just you and I going out somewhere cool.” Elijah trailed off momentarily. “You know if you want your dad to take you serious, I can help. Just let me.”

  Grayson cracked a smile as he looked over at Elijah. “A date?”

  Elijah licked his lips. “I want to take you out,” he said.

  Grayson shook his head. “I can’t believe I’m about to agree to this.”

  Elijah smiled only as cockily as he could. He stood up straight and took Grayson’s hand. “That sounds like a yes to me. I’ll text you tomorrow and we’ll work out the details, okay? Just make sure that you clear your evening. I don’t want to hear about you being busy.”

  Grayson laughed as he shook Elijah’s hand. He nodded, though. “Yeah. Deal.”

  “Deal,” Elijah repeated. He took a few steps back and winked. “Have fun with your friends. I’ll see you later, handsome.”

  Grayson tried biting his lip to hold back the smile threatening to explode onto his face, but all it did was draw Elijah’s attention there. His smirk made him laugh anyway. “Goodnight, Elijah.”

  “Goodnight, Grayson.”

  “Goodnight.”
>
  Elijah laughed, waving goodbye before finally turning to leave.

  Grayson watched him walk down the block with a smile. He pulled the lyrics out of his pocket and looked down at them.

  Come on, love, I’ll help you heal

  Baby, help me heal

  I’m looking for something real, real

  Chapter 14

  Elijah couldn’t believe that he was pacing back and forth in the mail room. He couldn’t believe that he was nervous over a date. Was it even a date?

  Or was it a thing?

  He wanted it to be a date, and Elijah didn’t know what to do with himself now that he could honestly admit that aloud without telling himself he was crazy. He wanted to take Grayson Paul out on a date. He couldn’t stop thinking about him and he wanted to date him. They owed it to themselves to eliminate all the what-ifs and find out if there was something here.

  Elijah stopped pacing and stared at the wall.

  Holy hell. He had feelings for this guy, and they were going to go out.

  It was a date.

  It was now that Elijah realized he wasn’t good at this. He wasn’t used to it. Where were they supposed to go? Dinner and a movie seemed too… high school. Too Dr. Bruce. That was his name, right? Yes. It was Bruce. They could go see something music related, but Elijah wanted to talk and get to know Grayson better, not have to watch any performances.

  “Are you going to pace back and forth like that all shift or…?”

  Elijah turned around and smiled at Fallon as she walked into the mail room. Finally, someone that could help him ease his nerves.

  “Hey.”

  She went over to the desk she always sat on and did just that. “Everything okay there? I haven’t heard from you in a couple days and now I get here and you actually look like you didn’t get dressed in the dark this morning.”

  He looked down at his outfit and straightened the sweater out. A backhanded compliment was still a compliment, and if he was going to be an artist on Millennium Records, he’d need to dress the part.

  “I spent the weekend with Lily,” he began. “We hung out, skipped work together, and she helped me write a song about Elmo and Cookie Monster. Mark came over, too.”