In the Shadow of His Wings

by Pamela Wells

  Gerhard didn’t seem to notice that there were no gifts for him that day. Laura thought he must be used to it. Since Hilda never left the house, she probably hadn’t bought her son anything for many years. In a small way, Laura felt sorry for Gerhard. She was angry at the man for kidnapping her. Terrified of the way he threatened her daughter, but he was quite pathetic really. He was so much under Hilda’s control that he was like a puppet with her pulling all the strings just as Christine had said she felt in one of her journals.

  In spite of all her controlling ways Laura wasn’t able to hate Hilda either. The woman was obviously very lonely. In all the time that Laura had been with her, not once had Hilda mentioned the name of a friend. Laura didn’t think that Hilda had anyone in her life at all besides Gerhard and herself. Laura and Hilda had spent many hours together talking. Laura encouraged Hilda to talk about herself and since the woman was quite self centered, it wasn’t hard. Hilda told Laura all about her life before she met Gerhard’s father. She talked about life on the farm and how difficult it had been. She spoke very little of her parents and seemed to be uncomfortable about discussing them.

  Laura strongly suspected something was very wrong in that household. Perhaps there was even abuse. She couldn’t be sure of course, but Hilda was very evasive and obviously uncomfortable when Laura asked questions about her childhood. Hilda told her how badly she wanted to leave Manitoba and how excited she was to meet Harold Bloone and find out he and his family were moving to Ontario. How exciting that must have been for a young Hilda. To meet a man who wanted to marry her and take her to a new province, to begin a new life, a fresh start with hopes of a much brighter future.

  Laura noticed that when Hilda talked of Harold and of their marriage there was no mention of ‘falling in love’, only of the arrangements and of their plans.

  Hilda talked about the two miscarriages in an off hand manner. This was something she obviously had accepted and dealt with a long time ago. When she mentioned the death of her baby Elizabeth, it was clear this opened new wounds. She told Laura how cute Elizabeth had been and how she was just getting to that adorable age when you only had to look at her and her entire face would burst forth in a huge smile.

  The kind of smile that lights up every part of the face, in that special way babies have. It was clear Elizabeth’s death was something Hilda had never accepted. Laura tried to talk to Hilda about Heaven and how she knew that Elizabeth was there, but this was another of those times when Hilda was still not ready to listen. Laura wondered how long it would take before Hilda’s heart would soften and she would be willing to accept Christ.

  Over the months the two women had grown close, in spite of their differences. Hilda wasn’t as hard on Laura as she had been at first. She still insisted that the basement be kept spotless. Laura was doing a good job of it without her nagging so that wasn’t an issue. Laura never complained about the shows Hilda wanted to watch, which surprised Hilda at first. When she was a teenager Christine used to complain a great deal until Gerhard bought her her own TV. These days she didn’t seem to care and never asked to have her own TV in her room. Hilda loved having her daughter Christine back home again. Hilda knew that Christine was there against her will and she didn’t doubt for a minute, if she had the key to her handcuff she would be out the door in a heart beat without even looking back. The rational part of her mind knew it was wrong to keep her here, but she couldn’t help it. She was lonely, desperately lonely, and Christine filled a void for her that had been empty for a very long time.

  Gerhard had disappeared up the stairs after the gifts had all been handed out and left the two women alone to enjoy their presents. He was soon back and coming down the stairs carrying an enormous cage.

  “What on earth!?” Hilda exclaimed.

  Laura stood up, also wondering what Gerhard could possibly be bringing down the stairs. She gasped when she saw what was in the cage. It was a dove. A beautiful, pure white dove.

  “One more gift.” Gerhard announced, “This one is for the both of you together.

  He’s an albino dove and I’m told his name is Angel, although you can change it if you want to.”

  “His name is perfect” Laura whispered as she went closer to take a look at the bird. He was a beautiful bird, no doubt terrified and unsure of where he was. Oh how she could relate! She wanted desperately to open the cage door and release him.

  Releasing him into the basement wouldn’t be doing the bird any favors. He was better off safe in his cage.

  “A bird?” questioned Hilda, “What did you buy us a bird for?” With a great deal of effort she got up from her chair and went to take a closer look. Laura actually smiled a little to herself and she thought how Hilda could act like she thought it was a dumb idea, but if it actually got her up from her chair then it showed she was interested.

  “I thought he might be a little distraction for the two of you down here. Once he gets used to you both, and the basement, you can even let him out once in awhile. I bought you all the supplies you will need to take care of him including a book that explains all you need to know.” Gerhard went up the stairs to get the rest of the things he bought to go with the bird.

  Hilda shouted up the stairs after him,

  “Well you just give those supplies to Christine. She can be the one in charge of taking care of it. It probably carries some kind of disease or something. I’m not going to touch it.”

  After Hilda finished yelling out her orders, she bent down to look at the bird and had to admit, it was a pretty one. Laura couldn’t take her eyes off the bird. He was beautiful, and so peaceful looking. This is from You, isn’t it God? This is another reminder that You are with me. You have covered me with Your wings. I haven’t forgotten although I confess I do need to be reminded now and then. Thank You Father and thank You for the dove, I promise to take good care of him. Laura actually smiled as she looked at the beautiful bird. She had to admit to herself that it felt good to smile.

  There weren’t many occasions to smile in her basement prison, she appreciated the way the smile felt on her face that day. She thought for a moment of Jim, Lacey and Josh and wondered what their Christmas day was like. Please give them a hug for me God, I miss them so much!

  Chapter 18

  January and February dragged by at a snails pace and some days Laura thought she would go insane. It was only by the grace of God that she was able to keep from going out of her mind. She had gotten quite used to Hilda’s company by now. The simple boredom of being confined in the basement day after day was wearing her down.

  She had put the picture frame up that Gerhard gave her for Christmas and changed the picture every few days in a lame attempt at easing the monotony. It was mid March now and Laura knew that outside the winter days would gradually be coming to an end. Soon spring would be moving in. She didn’t waste much time pining over that fact, she had spent so much time feeling sorry for herself that she had come to accept this way of life.

  She felt like she was a lot like the dove in the cage, most of the time she just sat there and accepted it. Other times she longed to spread out her wings and fly away. Fly away where though? She hadn’t seen the sky in several months.

  Laura stuffed her dirty laundry into a cloth bag and put it over by the stairs for Hilda to check before Gerhard took it away. This was part of their weekly routine. Every Saturday Gerhard took their dirty clothes out to a professional laundry to be cleaned.

  Laura had thought of slipping an S.O.S. note into her bag. That thought had occurred to Gerhard as well and he had his mother go through Laura’s bag thoroughly before he took them away. Laura had watched Hilda each week performing this task, hoping with the passage of time the woman would become lazy and careless and Laura could take advantage of that, but she never did. She checked each item of clothing like a detective looking for clues, making sure that Laura didn’t try to pull anything.

  Laura wasn’t sure she would have the nerve to try anything anyway. Whene
ver she thought of taking any sort of risk, she would pull out the picture of Lacey, thoughts of Gerhard’s threats would come to her mind and she would loose her nerve. She knew her chances for escape were next to none. Gerhard had been very thorough in setting up this basement. He was too smart and cautious to let her presence here be known to anyone outside the house. Even the food he brought home from the restaurant wasn’t in portions for three, it was simply in very large amounts for two and he then divided it out for the three of them. As Laura thought about the entire situation she realized that Gerhard had no intentions of ever letting her leave here alive. How could he? When he first brought her here he talked about how one day after Hilda passed away she would be free to go live where she wanted to. Laura knew that was a ridiculous promise. Gerhard would know that the minute Laura was free she would talk to the police and they would want to know where she had been and who had kidnapped her. He would go to prison for a long time for what he had done. Therefore he would never be able to let her go. Laura then had an awful thought. What would Gerhard do with her when and if his mother did pass away? Hilda was not a healthy woman. Even in the time that Laura had been in the Bloone house she had seen the woman grow progressively worse. She wasn’t sure but she thought the woman’s weight had increased. She seemed to tire so easily and fell asleep in her chair far more often than she used to. She broke into a sweat at the slightest amount of exertion. So what happens when Hilda dies? What would he do with me then?

  He couldn’t just let her go, that much was obvious. Would he keep her here indefinitely?

  Forever chained in the basement watching her grow old, year after year, bringing her Christmas presents? Laura shuddered at the thought. Would she then become a sick sort of substitute for his mother? He would never be able to marry or have anyone else come live in the house with him, but would he care? Would he be happy to continue living just the way he is now? The other alternative was just as awful. Would he kill her? If he can’t let her go, and he decided not to keep her, then the only alternative would be to kill her.

  Strangely enough Laura felt very calm when she thought about the fact that Gerhard might have plans to kill her at some point in the future. She already knew, without a doubt that God was with her, and she trusted Him. She didn’t fear death; she knew where she was going when she died, so death held no terror for her. It was upsetting to think of how her death would affect her family. She knew it would be very difficult for them to deal with, with her being gone so long they probably thought she was dead by now. Laura wondered what they were doing and hoped that they had gotten past her disappearance and moved on with their lives. She went to her dresser and got out the picture of Lacey, grateful the picture wasn’t worn thin by now from the many times she had looked at it. Laura wiped a tear from her eye as she thought of how much she missed her daughter. She would be finishing high school soon and preparing for university.

  Laura wondered which university she would get accepted into and wished desperately she could receive some news of how her family was doing. She thought of Josh and wondered if he was still dating Maggie. She hoped so, Maggie was such a sweetheart.

  Her thoughts then went to her husband Jim. She wondered how he was doing. Had he given up completely on her? She wondered how long he would wait before he would eventually remarry. She loved Jim with all her heart and she could honestly say that after all the years they had been married she was still head over heals in love with him. She was secure in his love for her, but she didn’t want him to stay alone for the rest of his life.

  She wanted him to be happy so she prayed that if the remainder of her life had to be in this place, the Lord would then lead him to another woman that would love him and love Josh and Lacey too. The thought of another woman living in her house and loving her children was not an easy one. She would much rather be there herself, but if she couldn’t be there, then she wanted her family happy.

  “Christine, come out here we have a surprise for you.” Gerhard called from the living room. Laura could tell he sounded excited about something and wondered what it could possibly be. She didn’t feel any sense of anticipation or enthusiasm. Her life in the basement was so boring and what Hilda and Gerhard found exciting, Laura did not.

  Laura quickly tucked the picture of Lacey back in the drawer in case one of them decided to open her door and rush her along. She hurried out to the living room to see what they wanted. Gerhard was standing in the center of the room holding a cake with a candle in the middle. Hilda stood beside him holding several presents.

  “Happy Birthday!” They both shouted together.

  “Birthday? It’s not my birthday.” Laura said, confused.

  “Of course it is silly, it’s March fourteenth!” Gerhard said as he put the cake down and led Laura over to it to blow out the candle.

  Laura still hesitated because she knew her birthday was in August, but then she realized they were thinking of Christine’s birthday, not hers. That made perfect sense, even if nothing else in this insane basement made sense, this did. So she bent over and blew out the candle as Hilda and Gerhard sang a badly off key version of ‘Happy Birthday’.

  The afternoon progressed with a festive lunch of Christine’s favorite foods, pizza, chicken wings, chips and dip, and birthday cake with ice cream. The gifts consisted of some more altered clothing, some jigsaw puzzles and a needle point craft kit. Laura actually appreciated the puzzles and needle point kit; at least they would give her something to do. Gerhard tried to make the two women laugh by putting on some music and dancing about the basement. Hilda chuckled as she watched him and Laura forced a smile and acted like she enjoyed the entertainment. After he had pranced about the basement acting quite silly, he plopped down on the couch in a fit of laughter, obviously thinking himself quite the clown. Laura asked him if he had a card table she could use to do the jigsaw puzzle on. He hopped up, glad to do his sister a favor and ran up the stairs to get her a card table and chair. He was back a few minutes later, set up the table and chair for her. Laura spent the next few hours working on a thousand piece puzzle of an underwater scene. Her dove, Angel, cooed in the background and Hilda watched an old movie on TV. Gerhard took advantage of the lazy afternoon to take a nap on the couch.

  It was about six o’clock in the evening before anyone moved. Hilda’s movie had ended and with great effort she got up from her chair. She nudged Gerhard and he got up from the couch.

  “We’re going upstairs to make supper; you can clean up down here.” Hilda announced to Laura and her and Gerhard went up the stairs.

  Laura stood up and stretched. She had been working on the puzzle for quite awhile and didn’t mind stopping to clean up. She needed to move around for a bit anyway. Gerhard and Hilda had taken the dirty dishes and food garbage with them so all she had to do was clean up the other traces of the party. She picked up the gift wrappings and put her presents in her room. She went back to the living room and straightened the cushions on the couch. As she did she noticed some change had fallen out of Gerhard’s pockets. Probably from when he had plopped himself down after his little dance. She picked up the coins and put them on the coffee table but when she did she noticed the key. She picked it up and held it in the palm of her hand and stood there looking at it stunned. It was the key to her handcuff and it was in her hand. She was holding the key in her hand right now. What do I do? Oh God, what do I do!? Her heart started to beat faster and her hands began to shake. She closed her hand over the key afraid she would drop it. I should hide the key and wait until they are both asleep and then use it to escape. Yes, that’s what I’ll do. She slipped the key into her pocket and sat down on the couch, her legs trembling. God help me here, give me wisdom. I have to do this right!

  Laura then thought this through more carefully. If she waited until night time, Gerhard would no doubt empty his pockets before getting into bed and probably notice that the key was missing. He would then search high and low for it and would not rest until he found it. He w
ould certainly not go to sleep and leave her unattended if he didn’t have the key. He wouldn’t risk that. So waiting till bed time was not a good idea. That meant if she was going to use this key, she would have to use it right now. The thought of going up the stairs while they two were up there, filled her with dread. She could get caught so easily. Yet what choice did she have? She opened her hand and looked at the key. It was now or never. Jesus help me!

  With shaking hands Laura unlocked her handcuff and dropped the cuff and the key onto the floor. For a brief second, she thought of the trained elephants that didn’t move even when they were strong enough to. I’m not a trained animal, I’m smarter than that and I can move. Laura moved towards the stairs and started to climb them, listening carefully for signs that Gerhard or Hilda might be on their way back down. She looked at the two doors at the top and knew that one led to the garage. That would be the best one to take, and then she could go directly outside and run for help. She hadn’t thought to put on shoes or a sweater but she wasn’t about to go back to her room and get them. She was wearing slippers and a sweatshirt and that would have to do. She reached for the doorknob that led to the garage but it refused to turn. She tried as hard as she could but the knob would not budge. She looked for an inside lock, a padlock or anything she could turn that would open it but the door appeared to be sealed up tight and there was nothing she could do. She turned and looked at the other door, the one that led to the upstairs of the house, where Gerhard and Hilda were. I can’t go through that door, that’s where they are! Laura trembled with fear but she knew it was either go through that door, or go back down the stairs and put the handcuff back on. She thought of Gerhard’s threat to Lacey, she also thought of her future here and she knew she had to step through that door. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. She repeated His name over and over in her mind, unable to formulate the words to a prayer. She turned the door knob and very slowly opened the door. She was standing in what looked like a pantry and she could hear Hilda and Gerhard’s voices, she knew that they were close by. They were discussing a roast they had in the oven and what vegetables they wanted to cook to go with it. Laura cautiously peeked through the pantry door and she could see that they both had their backs to her.