The Man She Married

by Ann DeFee

  A day later, Eleanor was having lunch with her sisters, Anna Belle and Eugenie. In their heyday, the Carpenter sisters had been the terrors of Magnolia Bluffs County—not that Eleanor would admit that to her own daughters.

  “I’m worried about the girls spending the night in Maizie’s house without a man,” Eleanor said, knowing Anna Belle and Eugenie would understand her concern.

  Although the Carpenter sisters had moved with the times, they still held some old-fashioned Southern convictions, namely that men were handy to have around. To their way of thinking a guy was good at opening jars, getting rid of spiders, moving furniture and, best of all, scaring the bejeezus out of intruders.

  “What do you have in mind?” Anna Belle asked. She was the least daring of the trio. Even in her sixties, she still looked like she could sing in a choir of angels.

  Eugenie was the athletic sister, and although she’d been married to a lawman for decades, she was never one to back away from an adventure.

  Eugenie took a healthy bite of a buttered roll. “What are you thinking, Ellie?”

  Eleanor leaned forward and lowered her voice. “I want to revive our Nancy Drew club.”

  Eugenie and Anna Belle looked at each other before bursting into gales of laughter.

  “Are you serious?” Eugenie asked. “We’re not exactly spring chickens, or haven’t you noticed?”

  Eleanor waved off her comment. “Don’t be silly. You’re only as old as you feel.”

  “Let’s discuss this logically.” Anna Belle had always been the peacemaker of the group. “What are you suggesting we do?”

  “I think we should keep an eye on Maizie’s house at night. Zack plans to cruise by every hour, but in between anything could happen.” Eleanor shuddered.

  Rascal that she was, Eugenie had the twinkle in her eye that meant she was interested. “So how would we keep an eye on the house?”

  “Do you remember the tree house Clay built for Hannah?”

  Anna Belle’s expression softened. “That reminds me of the playhouse Joe built for the girls. Do you recall the summer Liza, Maizie and Kenni spent most of their time in our backyard?”

  Anna Belle had adopted Kenni when she was a little girl and she’d been an integral part of the extended Carpenter family ever since.

  Eleanor remembered it like it was yesterday, but she couldn’t afford to be distracted. “So back to the tree house. Do you think the floor is still intact?”

  “Spit it out, Eleanor. What’s your brilliant idea?” Eugenie asked.

  “This. We can spend the night in the tree house and keep an eye on the girls.” The tree house was perfectly situated in an ancient magnolia in the side yard and had a great view of both the front and back doors.

  Eugenie hesitated, but then made up her mind. “I’m in.”

  “Me, too,” Anna Belle agreed. “That’s what family is for. So what’s the game plan?”

  Eleanor knew she could count on her sisters—they simply had to give her a hard time first. “We have to start tonight. I’ll need your help getting everything set up.”

  “What should we tell the men? Dave will have a fit if he gets wind of this.” Eugenie’s husband had been the sheriff for years. He’d recently retired and helped Zack get elected.

  “I’m going to tell Bennett we made a last-minute decision to go to the coast for a church retreat.”

  “I’m not sure lying about God is a good idea,” Anna Belle offered.

  Eleanor suspected that if her sister had been Catholic she would’ve been crossing herself. As it was, she had to make do with crossing her fingers.

  “Why don’t we tell them we’re going an overnight shopping spree in Savannah? Joe would believe that,” Anna Belle said.

  “So would Dave.”

  “That works for me,” Eleanor agreed. “I’ll pick you guys up later this afternoon. We can have dinner and hang out until it gets good and dark. I’m heading into Atlanta today to buy some supplies.”

  “What kind of supplies are we talking about?” Eugenie was getting into the spirit of the adventure.

  “I thought I’d look for some night-vision goggles and other covert ops equipment.”

  Eugenie clapped her hands; she was definitely in. Anna Belle was a bit more iffy, but she’d come around. She’d have to be on her death bed to miss a party.

  “IT’S SO DARK I CAN’T see my hand in front of my face,” Anna Belle whispered. Stealth was the name of the game as the Carpenter sisters hauled their gear across Maizie’s lawn.

  “And this cooler weighs a ton. What do you have in here?” Eugenie moaned.

  “Shh. The girls are still awake.” Eleanor indicated the lights in the family room and kitchen. “We have to be very quiet.”

  That put a stop to the sisters’ conversation until they reached the base of the magnolia tree and realized exactly what they were facing.

  “How do we get this stuff up there?” Eugenie pointed at the platform twenty feet in the air.

  That was a good question. How did they get twenty pounds of equipment up a tree without breaking a hip, alerting the girls or getting arrested?

  “I’ll climb up with the rope and tie it off. Then you can attach it to the cooler and all that other stuff,” Anna Belle offered. She was the smallest sister, and therefore the best one to test the strength of the floor.

  “Okay, go for it.” Eugenie gave her sister a boost so she could reach the first rung.

  “It’s hard to see the stupid steps,” Anna Belle hissed. By that time she was almost halfway up the tree. “If I break my neck I’m going to haunt you forever. You just wait.”

  Oops—Anna Belle didn’t make idle threats.

  An eternity—or probably only minutes—later, Eleanor and Eugenie heard her call down to them. “I’m up. Watch out I’m going to lower the rope.”

  A lot of good the warning did, Eleanor thought when the knot hit her on the head.

  It took almost twenty minutes to haul up their treasure trove consisting of surveillance equipment, Diet Cokes and an air mattress. They were working on the theory of why be uncomfortable. And they were making so much noise it was a wonder they hadn’t roused the entire neighborhood.

  “That about did me in.” Anna Belle was breathing so hard she could barely speak. “It’s not nearly as much fun as when we were kids.”

  “Hey, sis, I have a news flash. We’re not kids anymore,” Eugenie whispered. “My knee is killing me and I’m not sure I can get down.”

  “Hush!” Eleanor put her finger to her lips and pointed at the front porch light. “They heard us. Hunker down.”

  “DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING?” Maizie asked as she refilled Liza’s wineglass.

  “I don’t think so.” Liza paused the Pay-for-View movie they were watching and cocked her head. “Nope, I don’t hear a thing.”

  “I could’ve sworn I heard giggling. That’s weird. I’ll just run out and check.” Maizie set aside her bowl of popcorn.

  Liza pulled herself up off the floor. “Not by yourself you’re not. We’ll both go. If there’s anyone out there, we’ll call Zack.” She held up her cell phone. “I have him on speed dial.”

  Maizie flipped on the front and back porch lights before grabbing her emergency flashlight. “Are you ready?”

  “Let’s go.” Liza pushed her sister toward the door.

  “Why don’t you go first?”

  “You’re bigger.”

  “And you’re meaner,” Maizie retorted. “Oh shoot, get behind me.” The Westerfield twins tiptoed in tandem out onto the front porch.

  “Do you see anything?” Maizie asked as she swung the light in an arch from the street to Carol and Tim’s hedge.

  Liza peeked out from around her sister. “Not a thing.”

  “Chicken.” Maizie clucked. “Okay, Chicken Little, come on inside. We’ll go out back and see if there’s anything’s there.”

  “I should have brought P.B. He’d at least bark if someone came up on the por
ch.” P.B.—short for Peanut Butter—was Liza’s golden retriever. That silly dog would treat an intruder like a long-lost buddy.

  “Jelly Belly would be better,” Maizie said. “At least he could latch on to his heel.” Jelly Belly was Liza’s toy poodle and P.B.’s best friend.

  “Yeah, yeah. Come on.” Liza grabbed the hem of Maizie’s T-shirt and pulled her back inside. “Standing in the light makes us perfect targets.”

  Maizie hadn’t thought of that. She followed her twin to the back door and flipped off the porch light.

  “Is that better?”

  “I think so,” Liza agreed as they stepped outside.

  After repeating the procedure of shining the flashlight into every nook and cranny of the yard and finding nothing, Maizie and Liza retreated to the safety of the house.

  “Is the alarm on?” Liza asked.

  “I just re-armed it. According to the guys who installed it, a flea couldn’t get in here without us knowing it. I certainly hope they’re right.”

  “Me, too.” Liza resumed her reclining position on the couch. “Should I call Zack?”

  “I don’t know. What do you think?”

  “We didn’t see anything and we didn’t hear anyone. I’d hate to drag him over here for nothing.”

  Chapter Thirty-One

  “That was close.” Eleanor breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m glad they didn’t catch us, but it worries me they didn’t check the side yard. They’re already suspicious so we really have to be quiet.”

  “Yeah,” Eugenie agreed as the Carpenter girls settled in for a long stakeout.

  An hour later all was quiet in the neighborhood, and even though the light was still on in the family room there wasn’t a sound coming from Maizie’s house.

  “I think I hear a car.” Eugenie sat up. The sisters had been resting on the air mattress.

  “It’s probably that Brent Hardwick coming home from a bar,” Anna Belle whispered. “What kind of behavior is that for a church deacon, I ask you.”

  She poked her head up over the rail. “Oh, dear. Whoever it is has turned off the headlights and rolled past the Hardwick house. Do you think we have our perp?” Anna Belle was sounding less enthusiastic by the minute.

  Eleanor popped up to see for herself. Sure enough, a sedan drove slowly down the street—too slowly for any legitimate purpose. “If that’s not suspicious, I’ll pay for lyin’.”

  The Carpenter sisters’ original idea was to call the cops the minute anyone questionable stepped on Maizie’s property. Like so many best-laid plans, there was a glitch.

  “I’m not getting a signal,” Eugenie hissed. She smacked her cell as if that would make a couple of bars magically appear.

  Eleanor grabbed the phone. “Give me that thing.” She peered at the screen, hoping her sister was just too technologically challenged to make it work. “How did that happen? We had service when we were on the ground.”

  “It’s probably all these leaves.” Eugenie swatted away some of the lustrous green offenders. “I think they’re interfering with the reception.”

  “I guess that means we’re on our own,” Eleanor muttered, not quite sure she had anything in her toolbox of crime-fighting skills to handle this situation. Not to worry—steel magnolias were known for the ability to adapt.

  “Line up a whole bunch of Cokes,” Eleanor told Anna Belle. “Genie, how’s your pitching arm?”

  Back when they were kids, Eugenie had been a star slow-pitch player. “Not as good as it used to be, but I might be able to hit something, or someone, if that’s the idea.”

  “That’s exactly the idea.”

  As the car rolled by and rounded the corner the ladies got ready. Soon, their patience paid off. A figure dressed all in black came slinking across the Templetons’ yard.

  “Is that a man?” Anna Belle whispered.

  “I don’t know. Kind of looks like it, but with the ski mask, I really can’t tell,” Eugenie answered.

  “He’s definitely up to no good. It’s time for a good old-fashioned ass whoopin’.” And Eleanor Westerfield was the girl to do it.

  The intruder got down on all fours and crawled toward the back porch, oblivious to the fact that he was about to encounter the Magnolia Bluffs version of Charlie’s Angels.

  “He’s up on the porch. I can’t tell what he’s doing,” Anna Belle whispered. She was watching him through the night-vision goggles. The ladies of the church league would pop their garters if they saw her.

  “Keep an eye on him,” Eugenie instructed. “If he gets the door open, we’re gonna have to blast him.”

  Anna Belle had lined up at least a dozen soft drink cans. At the end of that arrangement Eleanor had placed a high-powered flashlight. They were ready for anything.

  “Oh, goodness! He broke the window,” Anna Belle squealed.

  But her sisters could hardly hear her over the blast of the alarm. It was loud enough to be heard in downtown Atlanta.

  “GOOD LORD!” MAIZIE SCREAMED. The alarm sounded like the hounds of hell had been set loose.

  “Someone’s trying to break in,” Liza screeched. She frantically punched numbers into her cell.

  Maizie grabbed her pepper spray and a fireplace poker. Why had she let Clay talk her out of borrowing Daddy’s shotgun?

  “Get down behind the couch.” Liza grabbed Maizie’s hand and yanked her to the floor. The strength adrenaline could give such a small person was amazing.

  “Zack’s on his way and he’s bringing the cavalry. And I have this.” Liza rummaged through her purse and pulled out a stun gun. “It’s cop regulation.”

  Although Maizie could hear only about a third of what her sister was saying, the stun gun said it all.

  “HE’S RUNNING. HIT THE LIGHT, Anna Belle. Get your throwin’ arm ready, Eugenie!” The over-sixty crew went on an all-out assault. Eleanor prepared for a soda can assault.

  “He’s coming this way!” Eugenie grabbed a couple of cans ready to at least slow him down.

  “Wait, wait.” Eleanor was the commanding officer on the ops. “Now, Genie, now!” The prowler was obviously disoriented by the hullabaloo. He ran first one way, then another and then he ran straight toward his enemies.

  Eugenie hadn’t thrown a ball in years, but like riding a bike, it was a skill that returned with a vengeance. Bingo—the first can hit him on the top of the head.

  “Good going!” Eleanor screamed. “Keep it up!”

  After her initial success, the Nolan Ryan wannabe pummeled the intruder with can after can of Diet Coke. When he tried to protect his head, she’d aim for his back, his butt, or the ground in front of him. The cans popped open, spraying sticky soda everywhere. It was a mess, but it was also a glorious victory.

  Lights were coming on all over the neighborhood. A siren wailed in the distance and the intruder crashed through the Templetons’ hedge before disappearing into the darkness.

  “How do we get down from here?” Anna Belle asked as she looked toward the ground.

  ZACK’S CRUISER SCREECHED to a halt just as Maizie and Liza raced out the front door, each carrying their weapon of choice.

  Liza threw herself into her husband’s arms.

  “Darlin’.” Zack gave her a quick kiss and set her aside. “I have to find out what’s happening.”

  His radio crackled to attention. “Sheriff, there’s a report of someone stealing a car on the next street over.”

  “Get a couple of units on it. I’ll look around here,” he told his deputy. “And you two—” he pointed at Liza and Maizie “—stay right where you are. Don’t move.” A second police car arrived and more officers spilled out.

  Maizie wasn’t about to stand on the porch while the big dogs did their thing. She followed Zack to the tree and glanced up, Liza close behind.

  Maizie was blown away by what she saw. “Mother! What are you doing?”

  “Trying to get down, dear. But Anna Belle’s too slow.”

  Auntie Anna Belle was halfw
ay down the ladder. Eleanor’s ample rump was barely visible and Aunt Eugenie was peering over the rail.

  Zack plucked Anna Belle off the last rung. “Eleanor, do you want me to help you down?”

  “No, honey. Just get out of the way. I’d hate to make my daughter a widow again.”

  Zack was trying admirably to hold in his laughter, though Maizie could tell it was a mighty effort.

  Liza poked her husband in the ribs. “It’s not funny.”

  “It isn’t? Are you sure?”

  By the time the three ladies were on terra firma, Zack had himself under control. “Would someone please tell me what happened?”

  “We—” Anna Belle started to speak but she was interrupted by her sister.

  “He—” Eugenie said.

  “We’re protecting our babies,” Eleanor finished. “That man broke the glass and was about to open the door.”

  Zack glanced at the house before issuing some instructions. “Stay right here. I’ll go check it out.” He stalked to the back door.

  “What in the world did you think you were doing?” Maizie was so astonished she could barely speak.

  Liza picked up one of the cans. “You bombarded him with Diet Cokes?” she asked. “That’s…that’s…hilarious.” Liza was laughing so hard she had tears in her eyes.

  Maizie stared at her twin. The doofus had gone over the edge. Then she took a good look at the matriarchs of the family. Unbelievable! Now that the immediate danger had passed, she had to admit it was pretty funny. Or perhaps that was hysteria talking.

  The entire neighborhood was assembled on Maizie’s front lawn, forcing Zack’s officers to act as crowd control.

  Zack radioed Bubba. “Have you found anyone over there?”

  “Not yet, boss. The report of the stolen car was nothing more than some guy sneaking out after a…a…”

  Zack took pity on his deputy’s apparently delicate sensibilities. “A tryst?”

  “Yeah, that’s it. Anyway, a man on the next block saw a silver Honda parked a couple of doors down from his house but he didn’t think it was important enough to get a license number.”