Battlefield

by J. F. Jenkins

  Much love.

  Alan chewed on a finger while he processed the letter. He needed to be careful with his response. Not only for his father’s feelings, but also because the mail passed through a security system designed to pick out any leaks or potential deserters, among other things. He turned his notebook onto its side, so that he could use the touch screen keyboard to write a response.

  Dearest Father,

  I do not mind you referring to me affectionately in our private letters. No one but me sees them beyond the usual scans. It is nice to have a small touch of home here. I miss it so, and more often than not, kind words are hard to come by. That is the way of the military though, yes? I am grateful for it. I have definitely changed a lot and for the better.

  He paused, still searching in vain for something to say.

  I have much to tell you, but I am tired tonight from an excursion on Earth. I was sent on a separate mission from the rest of my shipmates, and I have learned a few things I need to ponder. I will write you again in the morning once I’ve had some time to rest and regain my bearings. Still, I wanted to write you again now because...

  Because he felt like his world was crumbling, and he didn’t know how to pull it back together again.

  …because I miss you and mother terribly, and it helps me to miss you less when I write. I’m sure you will see her again before I will, so please give her my love.

  Always.

  That would do for the time being. He needed to sleep on the events of the night. He wanted to quit. He wanted to go home to his mother. It would be dishonorable, but he felt like that was fast becoming an inevitable outcome for him. Would it be easier to accept it sooner or later? Sooner most likely, but something Sir Tuliy said stuck with him. Only he could go about unnoticed. Only he could find out who The Doctor really was. Only he could stop this.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “No, absolutely not,” Orlando said.

  “But it would be so cute on you,” Tait insisted.

  “It’s pink.”

  “So? Don’t be such a wuss.” She thrust the polo shirt at him again.

  Orlando grabbed it and stared. “Do I look like a pink kind of guy to you?”

  “I think you could if you were feeling adventurous. You could put a little pink streak right there. It’d look good.” She smiled and put a hand through his bangs to brush it away from his eyes.

  “This isn’t even real pink,” he said as he tried to avert his eyes away from hers. They made him feel too squishy inside, and she was touching him again, which didn’t help much.

  “It’s a shade of. Stop being so nitpicky,” she said and shrugged. Her hand still didn’t leave his hair.

  He rolled his eyes, relaxing some more. Oddly, he welcomed the touch. He didn’t want her to stop. She had to know something was up because she was smiling at him in a different way than she usually did, kind of coyly. He swallowed and put the shirt back on the rack.

  “I’ll compromise and wear the rainbow bright T-shirt you picked out earlier. I’m pretty sure there was some pink on it. I’d rather be an eighties reject.”

  Tait placed her hands on her hips. “What do you have against the color? Too feminine for you?”

  “No, I just think it’s atrocious,” he said and paused, glancing over the racks upon racks of obscure and random clothing. The store they were in had no real rhyme or reason to what it sold. It carried a little bit of everything, specializing in the vintage and unfashionable. It was also the third store they had been to already that day. The department stores they had gone to had plenty of ugly button-down options for them to wear to the Sadie Hawkins dance, but Orlando hated being cliché, a trait he and Tait shared.

  She shrugged. “I like it because it makes me feel relaxed and cute.”

  Orlando snorted and picked up a rather hideous orange camouflage print shirt. “And being cute is everything?”

  “Sometimes it’s one of the only things that gets me through a day,” she said quietly. He glanced over at her, their eyes met again, and they both smiled.

  He sighed and grabbed the pink polo again. “I’d hate for you to not feel cute, you know, if it gets you through the day and all.”

  Tait placed a hand over his and directed the shirt back to the rack. “I’m sure I’ll have something else making it worth it.”

  “A compromise then, because I spot a black bowling shirt with cute pink trim,” he somehow managed to say without making himself look stupid. She tended to have this effect on him where his brain stopped functioning properly.

  “I thought we agreed on no black.” She gave him the look. They weren’t even a couple yet.

  “I didn’t agree. I gave up. There’s a difference, but if the black and pink are almost equal.”

  “It’s ugly.”

  “Not any more ugly than this.” He pointed to the pink polo he’d just put away.

  Tait picked up the bowling shirt and examined it. Her fingers ran over the seams and then over the stitching that held a cartoon pin drawing in place on the back. “It’d be comfortable.”

  “Yes.”

  “Okay, fine,” she said and picked up the shirts to take them to the cash register. She grabbed a couple of other things along the way for herself, as did Orlando. Pulling out a stack of cash to pay for her share, Orlando was faster with his credit card.

  “I got it,” he said.

  “Technically since I asked you, I think I’m supposed to buy it, but I thought you’d be more comfortable if we did this Dutch style and—”

  “I got it,” he repeated, and this time it was his turn to give her the look. She sighed, not fighting with him about it. He didn't mind paying for her because she wasn't a gold digger. Orlando had enough experience with those kinds of girls to know better.

  She took her bag from him, and they walked out in search of something to do.

  “Thanks, not just for that, but for agreeing to go with me to the dance. It means a lot,” she said.

  “Does it? I’m glad you asked me. I’m glad for a lot of things you’ve done for me lately. At the risk of sounding too deep here, I think you’ve been good for me.” He smirked at her.

  “Deep, yes, risk, not so much. You don’t need to worry about that. I can handle it. Who do you think came up with the idea of wearing matching outfits to Sadie’s anyway?”

  “I don’t know. I think it has something to do with claiming territory over your man. Back in the day, I mean. Now it’s just a way to embarrass people. At my school, if you were caught without your match, they put you in jail and made you both sing. I don’t sing well. Your school doesn’t do that, does it?”

  She laughed and shook her head. “No, we don’t. You have to kiss to get out of the jail.”

  Orlando swallowed. “How scandalous.”

  “Very.”

  He led her down into the food court. “We’ll just have to be careful then.”

  “Right, duh, of course.”

  “Unless...”

  “Unless?” Tait raised an eyebrow.

  “Hmm? I didn’t say anything. I mean, I wasn’t talking about that.” What a poor cover up. “Lemonade, I’m looking for good lemonade.”

  She nodded, and pointed to one of the restaurants as if nothing happened. “This one has some.”

  He followed her, enjoying the fact that she liked to lead him around. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d done something like spending time at the mall with a friend—a friend who was a girl. Years at least. The mall wasn’t necessarily his kind of scene, but after everything happening to him recently, he liked the normalcy.

  A week had already passed since the encounter at the river, and since he walked out on Alan’s quest. None of the others were bothering him to come back. He got the occasional text from Cadence asking how he was doing, JD refused to talk to him, and Alan hadn’t magically appeared to bother him. Sometimes Orlando thought he did see the alien wandering the halls of his school, but any time he did a double-take t
he man was gone. To distract himself and to forget about it all, Orlando dove into his new beginning at Lunar Falls, one that hopefully involved Tait.

  The two got lemonade and pretzels and found a place to sit on the food court’s terraced seating. They overlooked the mall below them while they ate. Tait chewed on her pretzel slowly. Orlando sipped his lemonade while wondering when reality would set in for her, and she would no longer want to be seen with him. Perhaps when she figured out she couldn’t change him back into a pretty boy. Part of him hoped she could like him for who he really was. He didn’t know what that entailed exactly, but he knew what it didn’t. He’d never go back to his past.

  “I see those gears turning,” she said at last.

  “So are yours,” he pointed out.

  “All right, I can go first. I was thinking about how easy you are to spend time with. That was one of the reasons I asked you to come with me.”

  “I think you’re the first person who’s said that to me.”

  “Then I guess I’m just good at understanding you.” Tait shrugged and took a sip of her drink.

  Orlando did the same. “That might be one of the reasons I let you stick around. And also the fact that you and your brother are the most non-judgmental people I’ve run across recently. Lunar Falls, in general, is open to being different. I mean, compared to my last school. I suppose part of it is because you haven’t known me since kindergarten.”

  “Maybe. We do have our cliques, obviously, but one of the benefits of a small school is we’re kind of forced to interact with other people more. Did you wear all black in kindergarten, too?”

  He laughed. “No. I was very different then.”

  “I was kidding anyway.” She paused, taking the opportunity to eat some of her pretzel. “I was wondering if maybe you had plans or something tonight?”

  Friday night, did he have plans? He had to think about this for a minute. He only had to check with Lyssa now. She’d shove him out the door if it meant doing something with a friend, especially a girl.

  “I think I’m free,” he said.

  “Great, I thought maybe you’d want to come to this party a friend of mine is having. It’s not going to be like huge binge drinking or anything. Her parents know about it, but they won’t be there. It shouldn’t be too rowdy though. Not like I’m into hardcore partying. I just like to go and hang with my friends. I’d like you to come. I mean, come with me. I know the dance is tomorrow and all, but I thought we could have, I don’t know, a test run or something.”

  “A test run?” Orlando raised an eyebrow.

  “For us.”

  “You want to go on a date essentially?”

  Tait shrugged and slouched.

  Orlando leaned forward. “I won’t lie. I think you’re interesting. I don’t need a test run to know if I’m going to have a good time tomorrow. We don’t need one to know that I—you know. Besides, I don’t do parties.”

  “Is that stretching your social agenda too much?” Tait asked with a teasing smile. This time he didn’t return it.

  “It’s just not something I do anymore.”

  She frowned, sitting up again in her chair and reaching for his hand. “Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you or anything.”

  “I’m not offended.”

  “Then for bringing up a sore subject.”

  “It’s not like you did it on purpose.”

  Another frown and he could tell she was dying of curiosity, but too afraid to ask him about it. He hesitated before shifting his hand slightly so his fingers intertwined with hers, liking the feel of her skin next to his.

  “Anymore. That means you used to be into parties once upon a time, right?” she said.

  “Yes.”

  “I’m having a hard time imagining you at one,” she admitted.

  “Like I said, I used to be different. This will probably shock you, but I used to be blond, naturally,” he said. His free hand started to tap.

  She laughed. “I can believe it, but only because of your eyes.”

  They were both quiet again. The question was on the tip of her tongue, he could tell.

  “You want to know why I stopped,” he said.

  “Of course, but not if you don’t want to talk about it.”

  It would be good to say something to someone about it. Whether Tait was that person or not was a completely different question. He trusted her, but he didn’t want her to hate him, too. Or pity him.

  Orlando pulled his hand away slowly. He didn’t move it far, but he wanted it out of her grasp. He tried to keep it casual in hopes she didn’t notice. Her eyes never left his face.

  “My best friend died while I was at a party.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry. Did something happen there or—”

  “No, I was at the party. He was at home.” He lifted his eyes to look at her. “Slitting his wrists.”

  Her hand went to her mouth. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pried so much. I can’t even begin to imagine what that would feel like.”

  Orlando waved a hand and started to sip on his lemonade again. He did it to have something to do more than out of necessity. In fact, he could barely taste the contents now. Just thinking about what Dallas had done made him feel completely numb all over again.

  “You have nothing to apologize for. I willingly told you. I’d rather get this out of the way now.” Before anything became too serious.

  “And what exactly is that?”

  “The part about why I’m such a damaged and troubled youth. Anyway, back to the topic at hand. I don’t go to parties anymore. If you decide you want to do something after, or change your mind, let me know, though.”

  “All right. I don’t want to push you, but I think it might be good for you to give it a try. Just keep it in mind? And for the record, I don’t think you’re damaged or troubled, at least not any more than anyone else on the planet.”

  “Fine, I’ll consider it.” He completely ignored everything else she said.

  That was when Orlando spotted JD walking through the mall. Half of him was grateful for the new distraction, and the other half wanted to hide from view. JD no doubt hated his guts. Tait waved. Why was she waving?

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “Saying hi to my friend.” She continued to wave with a huge smile. It could just be a coincidence. It wasn’t like Tait knew JD, so how could he be her friend? He was with a girl though, and she was the friend. Tait stood up and rushed over to her, and they both squealed as they hugged.

  “Oh. My. Gosh. I have missed you,” the girl said and jumped up and down while the two hugged.

  “Me, too, I’m sorry I didn’t reply to your message yet. Things have been more than a little crazy,” Tait said.

  JD took his time walking over, looked over at Orlando, and then folded his arms in front of him. “Hi. Angela, Mom did tell us to not take forever.”

  “Can I have two minutes to catch up? Geez.” The girl rolled her eyes. Looking at her and JD together, Orlando could see the family resemblance now. She was close in age with her brother. They were probably barely a year apart. Both had the same dark hair, but she had less of the family’s Hispanic roots in her appearance. Orlando already liked her because of the way she so easily put JD in his place.

  “Sorry, I won’t be long,” Tait said and stared at JD briefly. She must have recognized him from the football game because she did a brief double take between the two guys.

  Orlando gave an acknowledging nod to him to be polite. JD twitched a smile.

  “Okay, so there’s a party tonight. You need to try and come,” she said.

  “I could probably get out. Especially if my darling dearest brother would be so nice as to drop me off on his way out again?” Angela turned to JD and batted her eye lashes at him.

  He rolled his eyes. “We can talk about it later. We need to be going now.”

  “You’re probably right.” She gave Tait one more wave and winked at Orlando before skip
ping off ahead of her brother.

  “Good to see you again,” JD said quietly and then followed her.

  Orlando nodded and then sighed.

  “Don’t you know him?” Tait asked.

  “How do you know him?” Orlando asked.

  “I don’t, but I know her. We went to cheer camp together.”

  “Cheer camp, of course. Yeah, look, about the party, I’ll meet you there. I don’t know how long I’ll stay, but you’re right. It could be good for me,” he said in hopes of completely changing the subject. The last thing he wanted to do was talk about JD.

  Tait hugged him. He only wanted to go in hopes of seeing his friend again. It didn’t make much sense, but for whatever reason Orlando missed him. Actually, he missed them all, but he didn’t miss the danger that came with. Still, talking about Dallas and trudging up all of the old memories reminded him of the promise he made after he died. He wouldn’t do to anyone else what he had done before.

  He pulled out his smartphone and sent JD a text. “Come tonight.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Come tonight? What did that even mean? Come to the party? Come to The Apartment? To his house? JD figured it was the party and wasn’t disappointed when he dropped Angela off and saw Orlando’s luxury sedan sticking out like a sore thumb on the street. A number of teenage boys were drooling over it. He waited for his sister to make her entrance. He promised if he stayed at the party, he would not embarrass her. Not like he planned on staying long. He and Cadence had movie plans for the night, and he’d much rather be with her. If it weren’t for her insisting, JD wouldn’t have bothered to even show up to talk to Orlando. She still lived in this fantasy where things could be fixed, and they could at least be friends. They were never friends at school before, so why would that all of a sudden change now?