An Accidental Pirate, The Adventures of Captain Pigtail McQueue
Page 3
Chapter 2
When they made it up top the first thing they saw was the captain laying on the deck still tied to the helm. They rushed over to him, and Tally, who had grabbed a bucket filled with water, threw it on the captain.
Sputtering he yelled at Tally, “What in tarnation are you doing?! Here I survive a bloody hurricane and then you try to drown me when we’re safe and sound. I ought to keelhaul you right here and now.”
“Now, Captain Pigtail, Tally was just trying to help you. I’m sure he figured that you were passed out and so you needed reviving and water is the best thing to achieve that. Isn’t that right, Tally?” Wicket explained.
“Oh, yes sir, Captain, sir. I wasn’t meaning no disrespect of any sort, I can assure you.”
“Well, don’t let it happen again. And to make it clear, I was not passed out. I was resting after the long and arduous struggle with keeping the ship from going under. And that is the only reason I was laying down, got me?!”
“Yes sir, Captain sir!” All three of them exclaimed loudly out of fear of getting him madder.
“Sir, Captain Pigtail, sir,” Pill approached him rather hesitantly. “I think you should know that the crew chose you as captain because they figured you were expendable and that if the storm didn’t kill you then they could very easily do it themselves. Then they could have The Flummery all to themselves. I just think you should be aware of that, um, sir. Just in case there are some crew members who stayed behind. They may think they could still overtake you even if they don’t have the numbers of force they did have before the others went overboard. ”
“Oh, is that what they think? Well they’ve got another think coming, I can tell you. They don’t know who they are dealing with and if I have to keelhaul them all, I will.” He had a rather mean look to his face and this concerned Pill quite a bit. She had always thought he was a bit gruff but otherwise a nice person. She was seriously rethinking this.
“You don’t have to worry about us Captain, sir; we’ll help you no matter what. If you want us to spy for you, we’ll be more than happy to.” Tally was like Pill, he had always liked Pigtail as the cook but now that he was Captain he was showing a whole new and uglier side to himself and it scared him just a bit.
“I’ll deal with that when and if the time comes and it would best if you three stay out of the way.” Great, he was thinking, I have the support of two nincompoops and a little boy, how can things possibly get worse. He just hoped there weren't any of the crew members left, that they had all gone overboard in the dinghies, then he wouldn't have to depend on those three to help and back him. He then rose and went to look over the railing. And he learned that things had gotten considerably worse.
“Where the heck are we?!” Pigtail exclaimed not truly believing what he was seeing, or to be more specific, what he wasn’t seeing.
Tally had come over and was now standing by the captain. “So what happened to the ocean? Where’s the water? Did the storm just carry it all away and leave us without any more water?”
“Don’t be thick, no storm can carry away all the water in the ocean. That’s too daggum much water. It’s us that the storm carried away. As to where, I have no idea,” Wicket said.
“For your information we was in the Gulf and there’s not as much water in a Gulf as in a full blown ocean so that could very well have happened. So don’t go calling me ‘thick.’”
“Well, the storm would have to do something with the water, now wouldn’t it? So where is all that water? There’d have to be some place big enough to keep all that water and the only place that big would be the Gulf, so since the water isn’t here then it’s only logical that we’re not in the Gulf no more.” Wicket was getting exasperated over his friend's lack of logic.
“Okay, you two, just stop the bickering or I’ll rethink my decision to keelhaul you. Now I don’t know where we are but it’s just a matter of looking at things and figuring out just where the ship could have landed,” The Captain’s nerves were already worn enough, he didn’t need Wicket and Tally adding to it.
“Why don’t we just ask someone where we are? That would be the simplest thing to do, don’t y’all think?” Pill asked.
“Well, who the heck are we gonna ask? In case you hadn’t noticed we’re stranded and there’s nothing in sight, no houses, boats or nothing.” Tally told Pill.
“Yes, there is. You’re looking to the horizon, I’m just looking down and I see a few wagons and bunch of people all looking up at us. So why don’t we ask one of them just where we are?” It made perfect sense to Pill but then again she was talking with Tally and Wicket and they weren’t the sharpest knives in the drawer.
They all looked down and sure enough there were a bunch of people all staring up at the ship and the four people at the helm. They had horses, oxen and covered wagons and were all spellbound by the sight of a full blown pirate ship sitting there, right in front of them.
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Chapter 3