by K E Osborn
“Better eat before it gets too cold,” he says taking his hands from my waist and moving back to the table to sit down. I stand stationary for a second just trying to gather my composure. I swallow hard and then walk back and sit down to eat my delicious brunch that Chad has had made just for me. I really am a lucky girl.
We spend the rest of the morning eating and talking about tonight’s show. Aston came in eventually from being out with Caleb and was curious as to why there was a giant trolley in their suite. He didn’t ask any more questions, and nothing was said about it being my birthday. Chad and I remained quiet, keeping it our little secret.
Eventually, it was time to head to the 3Arena and I knew I was going to be seeing Danger again. I had such a great morning and early afternoon, and I honestly wasn’t sure what mood Danger was going to be in so I’m not going to go out of my way to find him tonight. If he wanted me, he could do the crazy stalking this time.
We arrive at the 3Arena and I make my way to the green room with Annie in tow. She’s still somber and I hate that she’s taking such an absolute stance on this break up with Aston because it’s causing tension in the band. But luckily it doesn’t show too much on stage, and the crowd are still digging our music which is the main thing.
I’m feeling nervous, I don’t know whether it’s just my usual nerves I get before a performance to a packed out stadium, or whether knowing Danger is here somewhere and I’m yet to see him is playing on my mind. I make my way to my trusty fruit platter and tuck into my favourite – cantaloupe. It’s so juicy and sweet and eating it instantly calms the nerves that are wreaking havoc with my stomach.
“You okay, Ella?” Mum asks and I look at her and nod.
“Yeah, I'm all right, just pre-show nerves and jitters.”
“How are you doing? I know I’m spending a lot of time with Annie and your father. I feel like I’m neglecting you a little bit.”
“I’m okay Mum, Dad needs your support. And Annie, well she really needs someone watching out for her at the moment. I’m doing fine. I don’t have any major worries, so you spend your time with them. I’m okay,” I say and she frowns.
“I know you can look after yourself, Ella. You’ve always been a strong and capable woman, I just worry that everyone around you is getting more attention and you might be feeling left out. I don’t want you to feel any less important than everyone else. Because you need to know you matter sweetheart. You are just as important as Annie and your father, and if you ever need me I am always here, okay?”
“I know, Mum. Thanks. But really, I’m cool. Just look after Annie. I’m worried about her, she sleeps all the time and hardly talks. I’m scared for her, Mum,” I say and she nods.
“I know baby, me too. I’ll be paying very close attention to her, don’t worry. I’m with her all the time unless she’s in your hotel room. Does she cry a lot?” Mum asks and I nod and frown.
“Most of the time,” I reply to Mum’s question and she shakes her head.
“Okay, leave it with me, I’ll see what I can do. Oh, and Ella?” she says and I smile thinking maybe she might just have remembered after all.
“Yeah?”
“You look beautiful today, sweetheart. You’re glowing. Something about you is different. You look…happy. I don’t know what happened this morning, but keep it up because it’s working for you.”
“Okay, thanks,” I say not knowing what else to say.
She squeezes my shoulder and then walks off, without a Happy Birthday Ella, but with a reassuring smile.
I stand on the spot and shake my head wondering what makes me look so different because I spent the morning with Chad. I had a fun time that’s for sure and he always makes me feel good, that’s a given. But I wonder why she thinks today of all days I look different? I shrug it off and shove another piece of cantaloupe into my mouth.
“Hey!” Chad calls out scaring me half to death and making me nearly choke on the fruit.
He chuckles and slaps my back as I cough and splutter while my eyes water.
“Geez, scare me half to death why don’t ya?” I say when I finally can get some air in.
He winces and shrugs. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. You nervous?”
I pick up a strawberry and shove it in my mouth and smile which, of course, makes him chuckle.
“That’s a yes,” he says. “You nervous about seeing Danger?” he asks and I nod as I chew on the fruit. “Well, fuck him I say. Don’t let him walk all over you, Ella. Be better than that,” he says.
I go to pick up another piece of fruit and he takes it from my hand and I raise my eyebrow and frown.
“Do you want an upset belly again?”
Pouting I shake my head. “No. You’re right. Thank you. I’m only eating for the sake of it,” I say and take a giant step away from the half empty fruit platter.
He laughs at my over-emphasis. “Well, we’re going to have a great show tonight anyway, aren’t we birthday girl?”
I open my eyes wide and quickly scan around the room to see if anyone heard, but no one did.
“Yeah we are, we’re gonna rock those stinky socks right off your feet tonight,” I say and he looks down at his feet where his trusty old socks line his feet.
“What? It’s tradition! You can’t break tradition, just because the socks stink now can you?” He lifts his foot up and rubs the sock along my leg. I jump away from it and laugh.
“Ewww, don’t touch me with that rabies infested thing,” I say and he laughs.
“It’s not a living creature, Ella. It can’t have rabies,” he says and I shake my head in disagreement.
“Bullshit! Those socks have their own ecosystem and they are building colonies in there. There’s probably a whole universe of something running on those things,” I say. He laughs and reaches out grabbing my arm pulling me to him forcefully and pinning my arms to my side in a bear hug so I can’t move.
“Ahh Chad,” I moan and he laughs.
“Take it back or I’ll squeeze you to death. These will be your last moments on earth, and all you’ll have to look at will be me, so make the moment count Ella,” he teases.
I laugh and try to wriggle free from him, but he just squeezes tighter and then he moves in placing his forehead on mine and looks right into my eyes while we both laugh. My skin is tingling and every part of me feels alive, I love the lightheartedness of this moment. We’re being silly, but there’s a serious undertone to it too. And as I look into his eyes I see a glimmer of something and I’m not sure what it is. I’ve seen it twice now, and it sends my heart into a flutter.
“Make the moment count, Ella,” he says while we both laugh as he squeezes me a little tighter. I lick my lips inadvertently and I notice he does the same. His breath against my face is making me feel hot, and even though this is a fun moment, there’s something completely sultry about it too.
“Sugar?” I just hear through our laughter and a knot forms in my stomach. I turn my head from Chad’s and break the contact our foreheads were making to see Danger standing in the doorway of our green room looking in and frowning. My breathing is rushed and harsh as my heart starts to beat at a rapid rate. Seeing him after last night is giving me mixed emotions. I notice straight away how gorgeous he is, and that makes me want to run and jump in his arms. But knowing he can turn on me so quickly without a second glance hurt, and I don’t know that I can deal with that again.
“Can we talk?” he asks and I swallow hard as Chad slowly lets go of his tight grip on me and I nod.
I look back to Chad and he’s looking at me, his eyes are pleading with me not to go, but I need to give Danger the chance to explain, I suppose.
“Ella,” Chad says and I grasp his hand and squeeze.
“It’s okay, I’ll be fine.”
Chad huffs and shakes his head as I turn to face Danger. There’s tension in the air as I walk toward him and I’m not sure who it’s coming from, me or Danger, possibly both of us. He walks out of the gr
een room and into the hall and I follow stopping a little way down the hall, he turns to face me.
“I’m sorry about last night,” he says and takes my hands in his and rubs his thumbs gently over my skin.
I exhale and look at him biting my bottom lip. “Why’d you ignore me like that? And ‘Thanks for the fun.’ Really? How insulting,” I say and he exhales and looks down at the ground and shakes his head.
“Sugar, I’m a dick. An A-grade dick. I’m so used to talking to women like that and, to be honest, I just forgot for a moment that you’re different. I know it’s stupid, I know it’s no excuse. When we got back to the party, I saw your dad so I freaked. Knowing what he could and would do to me if he knew what we were just doing in the hall concerned me. I didn’t want to risk him knowing, and so I wanted to avoid you,” he says. I raise my eyebrow as he cautiously looks back up at me and chews on the inside of his cheek.
“You don’t have to avoid me, Danger. I’m perfectly capable of being around you and not throwing myself at you in front of my Dad. I do have some control you know?”
“That’s the thing, sugar, I don’t think I do. When I’m around you, I just want to be touching you, and I don’t want Colt to see that.”
I can’t stop the smile forming on my face. “Really?”
“Really. I have this weird need to touch you, like all the time. When I’m not around you, I feel like I want to be and it’s kinda scaring the shit out of me, sugar,” he says.
My smile beams wider as I stare into his eyes, and the gleam in them tells me he’s being truthful.
“Say something, your silence is deafening,” he says bringing his hand up and caressing my cheek.
“It’s my birthday today,” I say and he opens his eyes wide and shakes his head.
“Why didn’t you say something? Are we having a party tonight?” he asks pulling me closer to him.
I shake my head. “No, everyone forgot,” I say and he furrows his brows and frowns.
“Really?”
“Yeah, but it’s okay, I don’t mind it being a secret.”
“So, if it is a secret, does that mean only you and me know about it then?”
I shake my head and his smile falters. “No Chad knows too, but it’s just us three now,” I say and he huffs and pulls me in for an embrace.
“Chad, huh?”
I cuddle into him taking in his smell and wrapping myself in his warmth. “Yeah!”
He rests his cheek on my head. “So you’re eighteen now, hey?” he asks and I giggle and nod. He half laughs and pulls back looking me in the eyes and smiling.
“Happy Birthday, sugar,” he says and then leans in kissing my lips tenderly. It’s the most delicately he’s ever kissed me. This is more like what I’ve imagined kissing to be like. Not the harsh needy kissing I’ve experienced with Danger so far. This is gentle and soft. And right now as I stand in the hallway kissing Danger so passionately my knees feel weak again, knowing he has trouble not thinking about me like I have trouble not thinking about him, well, I couldn’t have wished for a better birthday present.
And my wish came true.
Danger and I sorted things out and I know he felt awful for the way he treated and left me. I told him that it made me feel really horrible and he said he understood where I was coming from, and that he’d try to think of better ways to handle himself in the future. He’s worried about my Dad and I understand that. He really respects him, and I know he’s concerned about his band and the effects it could have on Recoil if something were to happen between me and Danger. But I think we’re both adult enough to behave civilized if anything went haywire. Which I hope it doesn’t. I’m just trying to keep positive. I feel much better about things now that I know he’s going to try and make more of an effort to be seen in public with me, especially at the after parties. He’s going to talk to me and be seen with me, but try to keep his hands to himself.
Last night at the after party after the last Dublin show, Danger was still a little stand-offish. But he did talk to me and we managed to slip away into the hallway and make out for quite a while. The way he kisses me makes me feel things I never thought possible. He amazes me at just how quickly he works me up and makes me want to rip his clothes off. I’ve never wanted someone so much in my life, and I know somehow, someway, Danger is going to have his way with me at some stage, probably sooner rather than later. His hands are starting to wander when we make out and he’s freely groping me now and I’m letting him because it feels so right and so perfect.
Right now, I’m at the after party after the show in Madrid chatting to Chad waiting for Danger to come in.
“So you seem a bit brighter, the conversation go well with Danger I take it?”
“Yeah, he’s going to try harder, he slipped into his old habits. And he wants to be different with me. So yeah, he’s going to attempt to be better,” I reply with a happy pep in my voice.
Chad exhales through his nose and shakes his head slightly. “I have no idea what you see in him, Ella.”
I half smile and look over to see Danger walking in, he looks at me and smiles brightly waving slightly. My stomach flutters as my skin tingles and I feel quite giddy as he walks toward me.
“I think he’s misunderstood Chad, he’s a good guy hiding under a bad boy image. That’s all it is.”
Chad grunts as Danger walks up to me and looks around the room for Dad. Dad’s not looking so he leans in and kisses me quickly on the cheek.
“Hey sugar, great show tonight,” he says leaning against the wall next to me pressing his shoulder against mine sending a shiver down my arm.
“Yeah, you too. You guys were on fire tonight.”
Chad lets out a fake laugh and shakes his head. “Right, I’m not gonna watch this mutual admiration society show. I fucking need a drink,” he says and walks over to the bar.
I raise my eyebrow wondering what Chad’s little hissy fit was about, but I dismiss it when Danger subtly takes my hand in his. I turn to look at him and smile.
“Hey,” I whisper.
“Hey, wanna get out of here?” he asks raising his eyebrows insinuatingly, and I know that’s his cue for let's go somewhere and make out.
I giggle and nod. We rush hand-in-hand looking back at Dad, who’s too busy talking to Dingo to notice us rushing past him. We make our way out of the VIP room and down the hall, searching rooms and laughing as we try to find a spot where no one will find us. Finally, a door opens and we race into a small little office and there’s a white two-seater sofa in the corner. Danger turns to look at me and smiles.
“Perfect,” he says and bends down lifting me over his shoulder and carrying me to the sofa as I giggle at his strength. He chucks me down on the couch forcefully, and I bounce on the springy cushions which makes my dress slide up around my waist. Danger smirks and moves in over the top of me. “You’re so fucking gorgeous you know that?” He pushes his body on top of mine and moves my legs to wrap around his waist. His weight on top of me is heavy, but I like it as he looks me in the eyes and then moves his lips to mine harshly taking my mouth forcefully. His tongue massages mine as his body pins me to the sofa, and every inch of me is aching to be with him. His erection is painfully obvious as it presses against my soaking wet panties through his jeans. His tongue piercing is claiming my mouth as he kisses me vigorously.
This isn’t sweet and soft or gentle. This is powerful lust-driven making out, and he starts to move his hips between my legs and the ache of his pants rubbing my sensitive and throbbing clit is almost too much for me to bear. I run my fingers through his hair and hold his head to mine as we frantically kiss. He grinds into me and I can’t help the small moan that escapes my mouth into his.
This feels so good and I know it’s all leading to one thing.
My first time.
It’s going to be with Danger. It may even be tonight, but the way things are heading right now, I don’t know how to stop this even if I wanted to, which I don’t. I feel read
y. I know I’ve only known Danger for a really short time, but I feel like I have a connection with him. The way my body reacts to him and the way he’s making me feel right now is what makes me confident he’s meant to be my first, and I think he knows it too.
His tongue plunges into my mouth as his hand moves up and under my dress. He shifts his weight from between my legs and I mourn the loss of contact and wonder what he’s doing when his hand slides down between my legs. I inwardly jump knowing he’s going to touch me. I’m aching for him and need him to touch me. He slides his hand inside my panties, and I arch my back. His finger moves along the crease of my pussy and I gasp at the feeling of someone finally touching me. His finger slips in and presses on my clit. I moan into his mouth as he continues to kiss me vigorously. A surge of pleasure from that one press radiates through me, and I never knew it could feel this good. He starts to rotate on my clit and I gasp again and arch my back into his hand craving his touch harder. Pushing firmer on me like he knew what I wanted, he circles on me and my breathing begins to escalate. My pulse is skyrocketing and I’m finding it hard to concentrate on kissing him through the pleasure. I clench my eyes tight as I begin to see flashes of white lights strobing in my closed eyes. My skin is flaming red hot and I’m coating with sweat. This is the most intense feeling I’ve ever had, and Danger is the one making me feel it.
“Come for me, sugar,” he whispers into my mouth, then presses harder onto my clit. His deep voice and the pressure on my clit make me shiver all over. My toes curl up tight as my body tenses. I take a deep breath and then with a swirl of his finger it hits like nothing I’ve ever felt before. My body screams out in pleasure and I moan loudly into his mouth as his kisses muffle my voice. I explode into a wave of ecstasy as it flows over every inch of my body from my head to the tips of my toes. Once the waves subside my whole body relaxes and I go limp, Danger chuckles against my lips as he slowly works me down.
