Mismatch
Page 58
We walked down the carpet, drawing closer to the queen. I could hardly breathe.
When the woman caught sight of Anders, a big smile appeared on her face, and she stood up from the throne. Her skirt flowed around her legs. I noticed she had a blue flower tucked into her bun that was an exact match for her dress.
“Anders!� She came down and opened her arms wide. Anders stepped into them and gave her a warm embrace.
“Lyzette, how are you?�
I watched them with curiosity.
“I’m great. We have another daughter, by the way.�
“That might be too many.� Anders was beaming. “That makes three then, right? Congratulations. How old is she?�
“Eight months now.� I noticed that she was pale and had dark circles under her eyes.
“Then what are you doing here? You should be home with your baby.�
“I know. I’m lucky to have servants.� She walked back up to the throne and sat down. We followed and stood in front of her. “These days only come once a month. I’m the only person these women can count on for help.� Her expression turned sad, and we all grew somber at the thought of the people standing in line today. “It’s the only royal duty I still perform when I have an infant at home. But how are you?� She finally noticed me. “And who is this?�
“Sorry. You’d think my parents raised me in a cave, not a castle.� He gave me an apologetic glance. “Meet Gwen Roberts. She’s my partner.�
“I see.� Her eyes sparkled. “You’ve settled down at last. I knew you would get over your issues with marriage. Gwen, you will have to keep an eye on this one. He has a wild side.�
I stared blankly at her. She had completely misunderstood the word partner, but I couldn’t find my tongue to correct her mistake.
Anders glanced at me quickly, worried. “Not that kind of partner.�
Her face fell. “What do you mean?�
“We’re pilots. We fly together.�
She lifted one eyebrow and inspected us. “I bet you do. Call it whatever you want. I’m not blind.�
I felt my cheeks grow warm, and she smiled at me.
“I’m sure Anders is a capable pilot, whatever the destination.�
“Stop teasing her!� I wished he were blushing instead of me.
“I wasn’t teasing her. I was teasing you. You’re a good pilot, aren’t you?�
“I’m all right. Good enough to fly through an asteroid belt.�
Lyzette’s mouth dropped open. “You didn’t really do that, did you?� She looked at his smug expression then shook her head. “And you’re still here to tell the tale.� She shook her finger at him. “You’re going to get yourself killed one day. If it’s just you dying, it’s not a big loss. But you’ve got Gwen to think about now.�
I noticed that he didn’t mention landing on an asteroid. Some things were too unbelievable, even for Anders.
Anders held up his hand. “I promise I won’t get myself killed.�
She smiled and shook her head again. “Why are you here? I hope you didn’t fly through asteroid fields just to visit me. What do you need?�
“A miracle, Lyz. A fucking miracle.�
“You didn’t just swear in front of the queen of Marka, did you?� We were being escorted to elegant chambers where we could clean ourselves. Lyzette said she would provide us with new clothes.
“Officially, she’s called the Markana.� Anders followed the servant into a large sitting room with two doors leading away from it. “I’ve been out drinking with her. She can swear with the best of them. Don’t be intimidated.�
The Markana. He had mentioned the title before, but I had forgotten. I would have to try and remember it. “I don’t think I’m well.� I sat down on a bed covered by the most expensive-looking fabric I had ever seen. “I need to rest until tomorrow.�
He came over to me and squatted, looking up into my face. “Is there something the matter with you?�
“I just don’t feel good.� I turned my eyes away.
He studied me intensely. “You have to face your fear if you want it to go away.�
“It’s not fear, exactly.�
“You’ll have to forgive me if I don’t believe you. You’re paralyzed in the presence of royalty. Are you saying that it’s because of a different emotion? Sadness or anger, perhaps?�
I felt sullen. “Okay, maybe it’s fear.�
“I can’t go to a dinner and ball by myself. Lyzette said her husband’s schedule is full right now. He doesn’t have time to meet with us. We have to go to an event he’s already attending if we want an audience. We have seats at a table with him and Lyzette. It should be easy. We’re going to chat, you can be your witty self, and we’ll convince him to help.�
“As if I’ll be able to say anything.�
He took my hand and brought it to his lips to kiss it. “Haven’t you always wanted to go to a ball and dance with a prince?�
“Stop calling yourself that.� I had been trying very hard not to think about making hot, sweaty love in the back of a starship with a prince.
“Well, haven’t you?�
I shook my head. I wouldn’t go.
“Please?� The look in his eyes was the only thing that could have convinced me. “Do it for me?�
I bit my lip. Could I abandon Anders if he needed my help? He had always been there for me.
“I need you.� I imagined I could see the truth in his soul when he looked at me like that and it rocked me to the core.
“Okay, I’ll try.� I didn’t know how we had arrived at this point. “Only for you.�
He put one hand on my cheek and softly kissed me, communicating a longing echoed by my heart.
The nerve-wracking dinner finally ended. Anders had been helpful, surreptitiously showing me which utensil to use at the appropriate time. He had heroically kept the conversation going even though I had barely said a word the entire evening. He had convinced the Markanor, Mikael, to help us without any assistance from me.
Mikael was sympathetic to the horrors of slavery. Lyzette had originally been his slave, but he fell in love with her and freed her. When he heard about the possibility of someone selling Earth women as slaves, he was ready to assist.
He and Anders were going over the details. I was so anxious I was only half-listening. But I managed to hear that he didn’t have many starships to spare. Raiders were attacking the far side of his planet, and that situation occupied most of his fleet. He would send what he could, and the ships would rendezvous with us in twenty-four hours.
By that time, we would have been away for three days. I hoped we weren’t too late.
After the dinner, the women retired to one room and the men to another. I had been extremely distressed at this state of affairs, but Anders just winked at me and gave me a smile. Did he think he could transmit courage with a facial expression? Now I was standing next to Lyzette, watching the other women mill about the room.
“Anders tells me that you’re a pilot too.� She was just trying to make conversation. I felt bad I couldn’t act like a normal human being around her.
“Yep.� I couldn’t think of a single thing to add.
“And you’re human, right?�
I glanced at her. I had forgotten she was from Earth, like me. The r
ealization loosened the straitjacket around my tongue. “Yeah.�
“Which continent?�
“North America.�
“Me too!� Her grin grew wider. “How long has it been since you left Earth?�
“I’ve been working for the Auxem for almost a year. They hired me on when Anders and his family came to Earth looking for women.�
Her eyebrows went up as I kept talking. “That’s quite a story. Anders and I chatted quite a bit at the conference, but we never talked about anything meaningful, I guess.�
“I know what you mean. He tends to avoid serious talk.� I decided to keep speaking so she wouldn’t ask any awkward questions. “Earth gets something out of it too. If we can get some women off the planet, it will help with our overpopulation problem.�
She nodded. “I can imagine. The situation was bad when I was still there.�
“And we would also be rescuing an alien race from extinction, which is pretty exciting if you ask me.�
“So what’s your role in all this? I thought you and Anders weren’t together.� She just jumped right in with the awkward questions.
Thankfully, a servant came up and offered drinks. I declined, remembering what had happened the last time I indulged. I needed my wits about me. Lyzette lifted a delicate glass and took a sip.
“I don’t know how to answer you.� I wanted to say something. Lyzette seemed understanding, and I had no one to talk to. I knew she had married royalty, but she was still a human, just like me.
I also desperately needed advice.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything that makes you uncomfortable.�
“It’s just…â€� I was getting tongue-tied. “I don’t know.â€� I explained how my marriage had ended and then kept talking. Before I knew it, I was describing my relationship with Anders and how we’d crossed the line. “Now I have no idea where I stand with him. I know he’s attracted to me, and I know he cares about me. He’s always been a good friend.â€�
“But you want his love, don’t you?�
“I just got out of a bad relationship.�
“Do you know about the Auxem life bond?�
“Yes, of course. But—�
“There aren’t any buts. You can’t have a bad relationship with a man from Auxem, not in the way you’re imagining. And besides, what makes you think he doesn’t love you right now?�
“Everything? We’ve been friends for a year, and I’ve slept with him. I would have noticed if he loved me.�
“I don’t know Anders well, but there’s something different about the way he looks at you. It reminds me of the way my husband looks at me. It’s like there’s no other woman in the universe for him.� She trailed off and stared into space absently, a contented smile on her face.
I stared at her in consternation. Anders? Love me? It seemed highly unlikely.
“I see that you don’t believe me. Well, sometimes someone on the outside can see more clearly than a person in the thick of things. Here come the men.�
I watched Mikael and Anders approach. Mikael was a big, blond, handsome man with a no-nonsense air about him. He had agreed to help us, and for that, I was thankful. But I hadn’t warmed up to him enough to be able to say a single word to him.
Beside him, Anders looked tall and slim. He had more of a wiry build, though he had plenty of muscle. His hair was more orderly than usual, and he looked different because of it. The suit he had borrowed for this black-tie affair made him look dashing and gorgeous.
Kind of like a prince.
“The dancing’s beginning.� Lyzette reached her hand out. “Mikael?�
After saying hello to me, he smiled at his wife like there was no other woman in the room and led her out onto the floor. A group was forming for a Markan country dance.
I could feel Anders’ eyes burning into me. “I like your dress.�
“I got it from Lyzette. We don’t have these kinds of fashions on Earth.�
He looked amused. “Let me rephrase that. You look beautiful in that outfit.�
“Anybody would look good in a princess dress like this.�
“I’m going to give this one more try. You’re beautiful, no matter what you’re wearing.� He dropped his voice and leaned close to me. “Or not wearing.�
I avoided looking at him. Finally, I said, “Thanks.� I should say something in return when he was saying nice things about me.
“You’re cute when you can’t take a compliment.�
My lips twitched. I wondered about what Lyzette had said earlier. Could Anders care about me like that? I had recently learned that lust and love were different. My marriage had been based on the wrong one, and look where that had gotten me.
All he was talking about was my body. Nothing more.
“Would you care to dance?�
“I can’t do that.� I watched Lyzette and Mikael weave in and out of the other dancers with elegant, fluid movements. “I’d probably trip over my feet when I walked past Mikael.�
“You were just talking to Lyzette when Mikael and I crossed the dance floor.�
“Yeah, but she’s a regular human, like me. She’s not royalty.�
“That’s my point, Gwen. All royals, when you look under the covers, are just people.�
“You’re not royalty, Anders.�
He gave me a haughty look. “Yes, I am.� He shook his head. “I wish you would stop denying part of my identity. I’m a prince. I can’t help it. And it makes me feel terrible when you say that I’m not.� He stared down at his fancy shoes.
“But…â€� Shit. I owed him an apology. I had never thought about how my words could affect him. “I’m sorry.â€� I took his hand, giving it a little squeeze. “I’m sorry?â€� I repeated myself when he didn’t respond. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.â€�
He still didn’t answer me and didn’t squeeze back. “Come on. Give me a break. Forgive me, please?�
He looked up, and I could see that he wasn’t mad anymore. He searched my eyes for a moment and then stopped looking at me. “We don’t have to dance. Let’s find somewhere to sit down. I’ll get you a drink.�
I followed him, feeling strangely disappointed.
Chapter Ten
GWEN
We sat at a table on the side of the dance floor. The lights were dim, and the room had an ethereal quality to it. The dancers seemed to float across the floor as the candles on the tables flickered.
It felt like a dream, except Anders wasn’t talking to me.
As the evening passed, Anders ignored me in the politist way possible. He didn’t ask me to dance again and barely spoke. I had never seen him like this before. He chatted with Lyzette and Mikael until they left and then we sat quietly again. I felt irritated, but I didn’t know how to talk to him. Should I apologize again? What would fix things between us?
“Hey, Anders.� I was determined to start a conversation with him.
“Shh.� He didn’t stop staring at the door. I followed his gaze and couldn’t believe what I saw.
The pirates had tracked us down.
“Come with me.� Anders grabbed my hand and led me to the middle of the dance floor. Everyone was dancing with a partner now, so we could turn and conceal our faces.
Anders put his hand on my waist. Without ask
ing if I knew the dance, he began to move perfectly in time with the music and carried me along. It was easy to follow him, and somehow I got lost in the melody and movement. For a second I forgot killers were looking for us. I only saw a prince who held me in his arms and glided me across the dance floor.
Why was I fighting him?
Soon we reached the other side of the room. Anders pulled me away from the crowd and out onto a terrace. After going down a few steps, we were on the palace grounds.
“I don’t know how anyone could live here. I’d get lost.� I muttered to myself. I was surprised to get an answer.
“They don’t anymore. Their family has a private house outside of town. They don’t like a lot of fanfare.�
That sounded like something I would do. We were more alike than I had realized. Maybe Anders was right when he said royals were just like other people. I felt like I was on the verge of a breakthrough. But I didn’t have the opportunity for self-reflection when pirates were knocking at the door.
Anders pulled me into the shadows of a tree with long drooping branches that almost reached the ground. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me close. I put my hands against his chest, feeling his heart pound.
“I’m sorry.� I looked up into his handsome face. “It’s just that, if I let myself remember that you’re really a prince, I’d know that you couldn’t possibly care about a commoner like me.�
His eyes had been tracking the movements of the pirates. They were a man and a woman dressed in formal wear like everyone else, but they were recognizable to me. It was Dorron and Oona, the two invaders from the docking bay. Anders turned his attention to me. He looked startled.
“Do you really think that about yourself?� He looked frustrated. “I don’t know how to convince you that it doesn’t matter.� He had unconsciously raised his voice, and I put my finger on his lips.
He kissed my finger and took my hand away. “Let’s go.� We ran into the dark grounds as quietly as possible. We held hands, and he helped me when I needed assistance because I was still wearing the dress. I silently cursed the man who decided women should wear ball gowns.