Body of Water

by Stuart Wakefield

  Oh no. I wasn’t ready for this. “Aren’t you going to get changed too?”

  “My costume is already on, see?” He pulled up his t-shirt and hiked down his shorts to demonstrate, revealing a solid torso as well as a band of brightly coloured fabric.

  I decided that I’d probably changed in front of him before in a physical education class so I pulled off my jeans and underwear. Leaving my t-shirt on made me feel less naked.

  He whistled. “Your girlfriend must be very happy.”

  I pulled on the trunks quickly, my face hot with embarrassment. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

  He took a step towards me. “Boyfriend?”

  I shook my head and fell quiet as he reached out and pulled the waistband of my trunks out towards him then slid his hand down the front. What the hell was he doing? Talking was out of bounds but this was okay?

  “You left the tag on,” he smirked, snapping the plastic that tethered it to the fabric and threw it over his shoulder. “Ready?”

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Lessons

  Two flights of stairs later and we were in the basement. The pool was larger than I had expected. Shaun switched on the lights and then dimmed them until the illuminated pool was brighter than the room itself.

  Shaun yanked off his t-shirt and shorts and tossed them onto a wooden recliner.

  “This is the shallow end, if you want to get in.”

  I took off my shirt and sat on the edge of the pool where he had indicated.

  At the deep end he took up position and prepared to dive in.

  I watched how his muscles moved across his ribcage as his arms extended upwards, how his legs flexed when he crouched, ready for his spring, then the perfect line of his body as he took off, arched forwards, and dove cleanly into the water.

  I had expected Shaun to be clumsy in the water. I didn’t know much about rugby but I knew what a typical player looked like, lumbering down the pitch like a juggernaut.

  Shaun swam the length of the pool towards me and surfaced a few feet away, resting his weight on his arms in the shallow water. His shoulders bulged and I felt the familiar heat burn in my chest and work its way down.

  “Get in then,” he smiled, getting to his feet and holding out his hands.

  The water cascaded down Shaun’s body, and I felt my stomach twist with anxiety as I stood, desperate that he didn’t notice what the heat had done to me. Suddenly unsteady, I waded into the water. It was warm and I was thankful for that.

  To my relief something else had caught his eye. “What’s that?” He nodded to my pendant.

  My hand rose to my chest. “Ruth gave it to me.”

  “It looks like an arrowhead. What is it, flint?”

  “Something like that. It’s a sign of protection. Some local custom where’s she’s from.” Since my adoption I had rid myself of my Scottish accent and felt no need to bring any attention to my ancestry. School was all about fitting in.

  Shaun waited patiently. He smiled as I moved towards him, not moving backwards into the deeper water until our hands met. He held onto me, his fingers intertwined with mine.

  His instructions were gentle. “Relax your neck. Open out your shoulders. Breathe.”

  But my grip on him tightened. This was a big thing. As far as I could remember I had never been this close to this much water, let alone in it. My experience with the wet stuff extended only as far as baths and showers.

  Shaun continued to encourage me. “Do you want to try putting your face in? That’s good. Next time try breathing out under the water.”

  As I breathed out water rushed in and I took an involuntary breath. I came up fast, coughing hard.

  “Sorry, sorry. Let’s just stand here for a bit while you calm down. Christ, that pump is working overtime.”

  He was right; there was a definite current in the water around us.

  I pinched my nose and concentrated on my breathing.

  “Do you want to try floating? It’s much easier than you think.”

  His hand on my back, Shaun coaxed me off my feet and into his arms. I felt vulnerable then. This was more intimate than I thought it would be, alone with this stocky boy in the water.

  “Now I want you to straighten out your body. Relax your neck again and let the water support your head. Don’t worry, I’ve got you.”

  The sound cut in and out as the water lapped at my ears. Shaun’s chest pressed against my side as I straightened out, his hands moving to support me between my shoulder blades and lower back.

  “Relax, Leven. The water is your friend.”

  I floated on the surface and closed my eyes. A feeling of warmth and relaxation ballooned within me.

  “Are you crying?”

  My eyes snapped open and I felt hot tears streak down from the corners. I struggled to cover my face from embarrassment, but lashed out. Shaun cried out and let me go, clutching his face.

  “Bloody hell!”

  I disappeared below the water; my lungs filling with fluid. Coughing wildly didn’t help; I was drowning. I bucked and kicked out, hoping to feel tile beneath me. I felt the current again, stronger this time. I was going to die in this pool, just as Ruth had always feared.

  Then I felt hands under my arms and a sharp yank upwards. The cooler air meant that I was above water now, but I still coughed and gasped for air.

  Shaun hauled me up to the steps at the shallow end and collapsed into a heap beside me, holding his face.

  “What’s wrong with you? You poked me in the bloody eye!”

  “I’m sorry, OK?” I shouted, angry with embarrassment. “I freaked out.”

  “You’re a nutter.”

  We sat on the steps, both breathing hard. I reached out to him. “Let me have a look.”

  He batted my hand away but I tried again, prising his hand from his face. His eye was pink and streaming, but I didn’t see any damage.

  “You’ll live.”

  Shaun looked back at me, one eye open. “Until the day you drag me under.”

  “I told you I couldn’t swim.”

  Beth stuck her head around the door, looking miserable. “We’re off now. Play nicely, you two. Oh, and Shaun, remember that I found Leven first, okay? He’s my friend.”

  He made a rude gesture in her direction then she was gone again.

  “Shaun, can we talk-”

  He stood up and reached out to me. “Come on. Let’s try again.”

  I felt like I had no option but to accept that he wasn’t ready to engage just yet. For now he was content with teaching me. I took his hands and prayed that I’d keep my cool as he walked slowly backwards so I only had to kick my legs.

  Determined to impress him, I put all of my concentration into his instructions, putting my head in the water a few times to get the feel for it and practicing holding my breath with my face submerged.

  After a few minutes he seemed happy with my progress.

  “Do you want to give it a try without me? Just kick off and see how you get on. You’ll be able to touch the bottom for ages yet, if you get into trouble.”

  Right then, this was it. I stood with my heels against the bottom steps and crouched down into a tuck. In one movement I put my head down into the water, pushed off from the step, and concentrated on swimming.

  I felt the water split before me and rush down my sides as I kicked. Much faster than I’d expected my hands touched ceramic and I was moving so fast my head hit the tile too. A sharp pain travelled down my jarred neck and I clutched my head, breaking the surface.

  “I’m so shit at this.”

  “Are you winding me up?” Shaun’s voice sounded further away than I’d expected. “You swim like a fucking fish.”

  As I opened my eyes I discovered that instead of veering off to the side I’d hit my head on the opposite end of the pool.

  Shaun stomped angrily out of the pool and wrapped a towel round his waist, yanking it tight. Scared at his reaction, I stayed in the water.

 
; “You’re honestly telling me that you’ve never been swimming in your life? Do me a favour. I’d kill to have your technique. You swam a length underwater and didn’t even use your arms!”

  “I swear to God I’ve never swum in my life.” He didn’t look convinced. “Maybe you’re a better teacher than you thought?”

  “The only thing I’m good at is rugby, trust me. I fuck everything else up.”

  We showered together in his parents’ shower which was big enough for four people, let alone two. I wished I was built like Shaun, with proper muscle. Sure, I had a six pack but I felt skinny compared to him. He didn’t speak to me or look in my direction.

  Back in his room, he fired up his games console and slumped onto an oversized floor cushion. He still looked irritated.

  “Have you played this before? No? No doubt you’ll be the best player ever. It’s pretty simple, just shoot the zombies and don’t shoot me. Go for head-shots if you can or shoot them in the knees and stamp on their heads.”

  I took the remote out of his hand and switched off the television, plunging the room into dim lamplight.

  “Why did you go, Shaun?”

  He glared at me. “Do you want to stay over?”

  Reaching out, I placed my hand on the side of his face. “Why did you go?”

  “Go on, stay over.”

  “I’ve got school tomorrow, haven’t you?”

  “We get a longer Easter break than you; that’s why I’m home. Tomorrow’s Friday. You can afford to be tired on a Friday.”

  “Why would I be tired? Wouldn’t we be sleeping?”

  “Well, yeah. I mean, of course.” He pulled my hand away but didn’t let it go. “What did you think I meant?”

  Frustrated that he still wouldn’t talk about what had happened, I gathered my things to leave. “Thanks for having me. I had a really good time. Sorry about your eye.”

  Shaun followed me to his bedroom door. I opened it slowly. “I didn’t hear your mum and Beth come back in. Do you think they’re all right?”

  “Mum probably got drunk, booked them a hotel room somewhere and passed out. Don’t worry. Beth is a tough cookie. She’s used to it.”

  The night was much colder than when I’d crossed the street earlier. I shivered as I ran up the stairs to my own bedroom.

  I tried to sleep but I kept imagining that I was sitting on the edge of the pool, watching Shaun preparing to dive in. I admired his body as before and watched him dive in and swim towards me, but this time Shaun surfaced between my legs.

  “Your girlfriend must be very happy,” he said and I noticed that I wasn’t wearing any trunks.

  “I don’t have a girlfriend.”

  “Boyfriend?”

  “No.”

  “Then there’s no one to mind me doing this,” and Shaun’s fingers closed around my—

  My phone vibrated on the bedside table, startling me. I peered at the screen, my eyes adjusting to the brightness.

  same time 2morro?

  I stared at the message for a long time, my heart drumming in my chest. What did Shaun want? Was he laying in bed thinking about me? Was the swimming lesson an elaborate ruse to get me naked and for some physical contact? Would he have tried kissing me, or more, if I’d stayed over?

  My fingers flashed across the buttons.

  gr8 c u then

  Thirty seconds later, my phone lit up again.

  wish u cud av stayed 2nite but lukin 4ward 2 2morro nite m8

  I didn’t sleep a wink.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Protection

  The next day at school was fuzzy. Geography blurred into Physics which blurred into English. The left side of my brain couldn’t assimilate any new information because the right side was in overdrive, creating a million possible theories for Shaun’s behaviour.

  I practically ran home.

  “Mum, is Alex in? Do you think he’d mind if I borrowed some of his aftershave?”

  She hurried up the stairs after me. “Where are you going?”

  “Beth’s. I’m staying over tonight.”

  “You’re what?!”

  “No, no, it’s not like that. You were right about her brother Shaun, we’ve made friends and he’s invited me to stay over tonight. He’s been giving me… Is it okay?”

  “It’s wonderful. I’m so glad you’ve made friends. They seem like lovely children in spite of their mother.”

  I laughed, shocked. She rarely made snide remarks about anyone.

  “Do you want some dinner before you go?”

  “No thanks. I’m not hungry.” I hadn’t eaten all day. My stomach churned whenever I thought of Shaun.

  Before I could react she had run to me and gathered me up in her arms, kissing my head. I felt her face turn wet.

  “What’s wrong?”

  She let go of me and wiped her face. “You don’t know, do you?”

  I’d never seen her like this. “Know what?”

  “You called me ‘Mum’.”

  I had, when I first got home. It had come out so easily. And how she loved it. She dabbed her eyes and tried to control little involuntary sobs. I couldn’t help but hug her and she held me so tightly that I thought she’d never let me go.

  Now it was time for me to kiss her head. “You’ve been the best mum I could have wished for.”

  I shaved, showered, and dressed.

  Ruth waved me off at the door, still sniffling, and it took all my powers of self-control not to run across the street.

  Shaun answered the door, looking even paler than me. Dark circles lurked under his eyes, but how those blue eyes danced.

  “Hey you, come on in.” He waved to Ruth and closed the door behind us. “Want a drink? My mouth feels like sandpaper.”

  “Have you got any cola?”

  “You need a caffeine shot? I don’t blame you. Think I’ll have one too.” Shaun got two cans from the fridge and set them down between us. “Didn’t sleep?”

  How could I tell Shaun I’d been up all night thinking about him? “Yeah, just um, you know… long day at school.”

  “Right,” Shaun smiled, drawing the word out. “Long day.”

  Silence fell between us, finally pierced by the snap and hiss of him opening the cans.

  “Where’s Beth?”

  “At a sleep-over. She wanted to stay here when she found out you were coming over but I persuaded my mother to accept the invitation. Beth’s become quite a fan of you.”

  “And your mum and dad?”

  “They’ve gone to Milan for the weekend. Some anniversary or something.” Shaun rolled his eyes. “Like they need an excuse.”

  Another silence fell between us. I found the pattern on the marble work surface suddenly fascinating.

  Shaun seemed awkward then. “Shall we go upstairs and get changed?”

  “I’ve got my trunks on underneath.”

  A beat. “You mean my trunks.” Was Shaun disappointed? Did he want to see me naked again? “Aren’t they a bit tight? You barely fitted into them. I have some swim shorts that might be better for you. Why don’t you try them on?”

  I took a big gulp of cola and put the can down. It clattered as I did so, my hand shook so much.

  Up in Shaun’s room, the air seemed thick. As he took off his shirt his entire attitude from yesterday was gone. Now he seemed as nervous as I felt. He took the shorts out of a drawer and held them out.

  “Here you go.”

  I took them. Shaun shifted his weight anxiously from foot to foot.

  “Aren’t you going to change?”

  “I’ve got my trunks on underneath too.”

  I eyed the bulge in Shaun’s trousers. “Aren’t they a bit tight?”

  “You think so?”

  “We’re not really going swimming, are we?”

  He rubbed the back of his neck. “We don’t have to swim right now if you don’t feel like it. Maybe later.”

  “Later? After what?” I was really pushing him now.

&n
bsp; He turned his chin upwards and took a deep breath like he was just about to go under. “Um…video game?”

  If this was going to happen I was going to have to make the first move. I shivered despite the room’s warmth.

  The kiss was tender, if not a little clumsy. As it deepened, Shaun’s hands came up and rested on my waist. Teeth grazed lips, noses bumped, but it still felt good. Shaun tasted sweet like a vanilla bun. My hands came to life and travelled up Shaun’s arms, feeling the solid, interlocking forms of bone and muscle. When my hands reached his shoulders, they reversed their journey.

  Shaun pulled me closer to him and our hips met. I wondered if his flesh tasted as good as his mouth.

  Leaning back from the waist, I tried untying Shaun’s jogging bottoms but the knot was too tight. His hands closed over mine as he ducked his head down to look up at me, his eyes wide.

  “Do you really want to?” But his hands were already on the knot, too. He worked it free.

  I dropped a kiss onto his shoulder, across his collar bone, and down his chest. Lowering myself onto my knees, I kissed Shaun’s abs and tugged his jogging pants down.

  Shaun’s trunks revealed the extent of his excitement and I was flattered that he wanted me so much.

  I tugged on his waistband and he trembled at the touch. From the sticky mess within, Shaun had been excited for a long time. I took hold of it very gently and tasted the foreskin bunched at the tip. Shaun made a sound and I felt one of his hands in my hair. I looked up to see Shaun looking back down at me, his expression ecstatic.

  Fluid leaked free as I pulled back his foreskin. The aroma intoxicated me and I wanted to taste it. I licked the tip and Shaun’s cock bounced wildly. The taste exploded in my mouth, salt and sweet.

  Shaun’s grip on my head tightened and he pushed forwards a little. He tasted so good that I wanted to swallow him whole. My confidence grew and I sucked harder, my hands finding a natural resting place on Shaun’s rock-hard arse.

  A moment later his grip on my head tightened and he held me still while he rocked back and forth. He gazed down at me with a look that took me by surprise. Shaun’s eyes had filled with tears. Then a shudder wracked his entire body and his head fell back.