by Ryan Michele
The town is quiet as we enter, passing old buildings and lots of different houses. A grocery store and a salon are in a small strip mall that looks like it’s just been built. When the bike begins to slow, my heart rate picks up and my hands grip Green tightly.
Tall block walls line about a half a block with large barbed wire on the top, making it look like one of those prison compounds you see in movies. It even has a tower where a man stands looking down at us then waves us in. As he does, the steel gate creaks open, moving off to the left. The bike jolts us as we enter, the inside looking a lot more inviting than the outside. Green grass is off to the left with a huge jungle gym, and in front of it is a large building that looks almost like a warehouse. To the right is the automotive shop with a large sign that says Banner Automotive. This is where Green works.
In front of that is a large parking lot filled with bikes and cars. Green pulls into where all the bikes are and kills the engine. I still haven’t released my grip from around his body, but as I inhale the Georgia night, slowly my fingers release from him.
“Hop off, babe.”
Only then does my body become unstuck and I do as he asks, whipping my helmet off my head and the bandana that I have to wear to protect the parts of my head that are still a bit raw. Even with the hair growing in, different areas have different sensitivities. It’s just another stark reminder of my past. Hair shouldn’t be something you hate to look at because of the memories that come with it.
Green swings his leg over the bike then pulls me into his arms and kisses me hard on the lips. “That ride was exactly what I needed, Leah.”
My lips tip up. His body does seem much more relaxed than when we left Florida. I bet being home helps him too. He always talked about how his brothers were family, and it’s been a really long time since he’s seen some of them.
“But don’t think you’re gettin’ off shit, because we have a lot of talking to do. Be ready.”
“Leah!” My name screamed in a voice I desperately recognize comes barreling toward me, and Green lets me go just as Bristyl wraps her arms around me tight. Closing my eyes and inhaling my best friend, the knot inside me gets even looser. Damn, I’ve missed her so damn much. “I’m so happy you’re here,” she says into my neck.
“Me too.”
Bristyl jumps back a bit, startling me. “I’m sorry, did I hurt you?”
This time my smile is full on because this is what I love about Bristyl. She’s so damn caring, and I’m lucky to call her my friend. A dark cloud settles around me and I pull her back into my arms, crashing her body to mine. Guilt rides me hard, and my eyes start to water. My actions brought Bristyl to me and while I don’t know everything that happened with her, Cooper, and her dad, Regg, I know bits and pieces.
“I’m so sorry, Bristyl. I never thought they’d let you come alone, but it’s on me. I should’ve never told you to come to me.” A sob erupts from deep in my soul, bleeding all over the place as her grip gets tighter around me.
How could I have done that to my best friend? Even getting my hair pulled out of my head, I should’ve kept my mouth shut. I shouldn’t have told her to come to me. That was one of the stupidest decisions I’ve made. I don’t know how she has forgiven me so easily, but she has and I’m grateful for it. I just don’t know how to forgive myself.
She pulls away from me, her hands locked on my arms, demanding that I give her my full attention. “Those assholes were after me, Leah, not you. They knew who I was and were told they could have me. Those dickwads knew you and I were friends. My guess is they were tracking my computer and when you pulled up the dating site it was their in.”
She shudders, still holding me in place.
I start to talk, but she cuts me off, “No. No, no, no. I know what you are going to say, and no. They would have found some way to get me. This is my fault. Every cut and bruise on your body is my fault.” My heart breaks that she is blaming herself for this. She couldn’t control those men and their actions. I hate that she’s feeling this way.
Shaking my head, she still doesn’t let me talk and continues on. “I’m so sorry that you got the shit end of this mess. I’m so sorry I didn’t get there sooner to stop what they were doing to you. I’m so sorry that you were in a coma and I wasn’t there for you. By the way, Cooper is still paying for that one. But most of all, I’m so damn sorry that they had the opportunity to destroy your life in the blink of an eye. You deserve so much in this world and not this. I want you happy.”
Destroy. But they didn’t. They don’t get that power from me. They don’t get to destroy my life. My life is new and building with Green. They don’t get that.
On a hiccup with tears streaming down my face, I turn my head to Green who stands with several of his brothers, his focus solely on me. “I’m getting there.”
Bristyl kisses me on the cheek, and I’m put through a round of introductions. Several of them I met at the rally when I first met Green. Dagger, who hit on us, now has a very pretty woman wrapped around him. Rhys was pissed the entire time and still looks it with his arms crossed over his chest. Cruz was and still is overpowering. GT is a brand of hot that comes with age. There are the twins, Buzz and Breaker, who look exactly alike. Tug with a knockout of a woman next to him. Cooper has his eyes directly on his woman in front of me. All of them welcoming.
“Leah?” A woman with black hair with red streaks comes up to me wearing black jeans, boots, and a top with a deep cut in the front. Her entire demeanor screams Fuck with me and I’ll end you. She’s not one of those people who sends out cookies for a newcomer. No, she’s assessing me from top to toe and little goose bumps stand on my skin. Not going to lie, she scares me a bit.
“Princess, this is Leah,” Bristyl introduces. “Leah, this is Cooper’s mom, Princess.”
“Hi.” I give a soft wave, feeling like a goof.
“Hey. I’m your new training partner.”
Confusion hits me. Training partner? What the hell?
“I’m sorry, but what?”
Bristyl stands to my side, smiling like a fool in love; good thing she is or that would look dumb. “Princess knows her way around and can teach you some things to defend yourself.”
I reach up and clasp my neck, that tingle of fear and embarrassment rising up quickly. These people, all of them know what happened to me. I’m not sure why that gets to me, but it does.
“Not that anything is going to happen to you, but Princess can help you take care of yourself. If someone should happen to come up behind you, she’ll teach you how to get out of it,” Bristyl says.
The ball uncurls in my shoulders slightly. “Really?”
Princess steps up closer. “Bristyl and Green say you’re good people. That means you’re my people, and you will learn to tear a man’s balls from his groin if he ever lays a hand on you.”
Green takes that moment to walk up to me and put his arm around my shoulder. “Damn, Princess, my balls hurt.”
“Then have your woman rub them,” she smarts off to him, and a chuckle escapes me.
“Don’t you worry about that, but I think it’s good.” He squeezes me. “What do you think? Want to learn from the most badass woman here in Ravage?”
“No hair pulling,” I blurt out before thinking, my hands going to my head as I remember the agony. “I’m sorry… it’s just that…”
Princess steps up closer. “I’ve been given the low down on what happened to you. We won’t do anything to hurt you.”
“Most of my cuts have.” Subconsciously, I pull the sleeves of my shirt down and grab the material in my fists, not wanting to show any of my scars. They’re ugly, leaving the memories of that day forever etched on my skin.
“Beautiful, those scars don’t make us who we are. Those marks are nothing but war stamps. Why, because you lived through it. Because you’re standing here in front of me and not six feet under with a man at your side who will do anything to protect you. Because you’re a beautiful woman who was
dealt a shit hand but will come out stronger and happier on the other end. Always remember that.”
Breathing out, I look up at Green. “I like her.”
He laughs, “Yeah, she’s likable. Just don’t piss her off.”
Not that I planned on doing it anytime soon anyway, but I’m totally game with learning from her. Maybe this is part of healing and moving on, learning how to protect myself. Because having a man to lean on is great, but having yourself is even better.
Having everyone around me so suddenly though is a bit overwhelming. Okay, a lot overwhelming. These men and women seem so sure of themselves and what they stand for. I want that. I want to be confident again. Dammit—somehow, someway—I will find it.
19
Green
“Hit me.” Sitting around the church table in the clubhouse and inhaling the smells of home does something to center me in a way I haven’t felt since Leah was found. The dented wood of the large table speaks of years of experience and decisions. The walls lined with pictures and our emblem make this place our sanctuary.
Being away from the clubhouse for so long, I almost forgot the air of power this room holds. The brothers around the table all sit back in their chairs giving our president, Cruz, his time to talk. Damn it feels good to be back and even better because my woman is with me.
Leah’s with Bristyl, and inside this clubhouse she is safe. That’s what I think the calm is. It’s knowing that within the walls of this compound, the outside is blocked off from her, and no one can come in and inflict pain on her; that is where the calm is. It’s like the weight of that responsibility, while still on my shoulders because she’s mine, is lighter in a way. No one will hurt Leah again. Ever.
“Talked to the prez of Red Devils,” Cruz starts out, clasping his hands in front of him. “He’s got two rogues.” Alertness comes. “They’re pissed about what happened to Nick, Poe, and Len and didn’t like the way their prez handled the situation. They reacted.”
“Fuck,” I groan.
“Pretty much. Guys names are Jonny and Troy. They were very close to those three, according to their prez. Jonny is the leader of the two, and Troy is the puppet. Prez wouldn’t tell me much more about them, and I was surprised at what I got. Bottom line, they’re after your girl, wanna see her pay. And they want Bristyl to pay as well.”
“What the fuck?” Cooper booms from the left of his father. “Fuck them if they think they’re gettin’ their hands on my girl.”
“Second that.” I wave my hand. “Not fuckin’ happenin’.”
“We agree,” GT, the vice president, speaks. “They will be taken out. Buzz has some intel, and we’re suitin’ up tomorrow and headin’ out first touch of daylight.”
“Back to Florida?” I ask.
“Yep, just outside of where you were. Fuckers used a prepaid phone thinkin’ they wouldn’t be found. Problem is they used a credit card to pay for the fuckin’ phone in the first place.”
“Idiots.”
“Pretty much.” GT adds, “So we roll out at dawn, take these fuckers out, and get back before nightfall.”
For the next hour, we make plans; looking at aerials of their location and even watch the fuckers on some security footage that Buzz hacked into. We know every place they’ve been in the last five days— what restaurants, dive bars, and hookers they’ve hurt. They’ll pay for that too. Buzz even found footage of these two breaking into Leah’s place, pissing me off royally. Her door was way too fucking easy to get open.
These two are dumb fucks thinking their phones were untraceable. You have to go through a lot to get them discreet nowadays. Or at least have a man in your pocket who will get you one with no trace.
Tomorrow, we end them and make Leah and Bristyl safe. For good.
Leah sits on the bed in my room at the clubhouse, her focus pulling from the magazine she's reading and coming to me. My room isn’t anything to scream about. Wood paneled walls with some Ravage things hung and then some posters. A bathroom is attached to every room in Ravage on the main floor. A dresser, television, and a bed round out the place.
But there’s something about seeing my woman in my space that tips my world. She’s part of my family whether she likes it or not, and I couldn’t be fucking happier about that.
Normally, I stay at my apartment just down the road, but when Leah was hurt and I stayed with her, I closed out my lease and had my brothers bring my shit here. That’s what all the boxes in the corner are. The couch and chair are MIA, but I’m sure they’ll turn up.
After the day we’ve had, I should just go to sleep so I’m ready for tomorrow, but we have shit to discuss and it needs to be done before then. As she tosses the magazine to the side she moves her body so she’s sitting cross-legged, waiting for me to sit. I do, but instead of letting her keep her distance and space, I pull her into my arms and on my lap.
She lays her head on my chest and curls into me. Fucking love when she does that.
“You know what I feared when I couldn’t find you?” I start, and feel her body tense. “I thought they got to you again. Thought they were hurting you and I’d find you bloody and dead somewhere. Thought our time was over. Thought I failed you.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispers. “I didn’t mean for that.”
“Tell me why. Why did you need to sneak around?” The knot in my chest tightens as the long pause is too much. “Leah?”
“You were around all the time, and I didn’t have a chance to think. Even in the bathroom, I knew you were right outside and I needed some space.” She raises up to meet my gaze. “You can’t tell me that you would’ve let me go alone because I know you wouldn’t.”
“There…”
Her index finger comes to my lips. “Please let me get this out.” I nod once, giving her this play.
“I loved having you around even when I was dead set on you leaving. You provided me with a comfort that I was depending on. Anne asked me once if you were my crutch, and I told her no. Then I started to think about it and got my head even more twisted.” She breathes out and I tighten my grip on her, so damn happy she’s getting this all out. It’s damn hard though to keep quiet and let her speak.
“My head’s been messed up for a long time, and I’m not saying that it’s still not, but I’m better than when I woke up. I was devastated that you were leaving me, but I didn’t know if coming with you was because you would protect me or if I really wanted to come and start our lives together.”
Her eyes glisten with tears as she shifts just a bit in my lap. “I was coming home to tell you that I wanted to come to Sumner with you. That I wanted to pack up and leave everything in Florida behind. I know I can’t leave my parents, but visiting is much different than living day in and day out.”
She surprises me with her confession because she kept pushing me away, saying that she couldn’t come with me because she had to stand on her own. But I’m fucking happy she did.
“Babe?”
“I’m sorry, Green. I knew you’d be mad. And I knew you’d look for me. But I didn’t know my place was going to get trashed. I knew I’d have to explain things to you once I got back, but never in my wildest dreams did I think someone would break in.”
I suck my bottom lip into my mouth and let it pop out. “This mean we’re done with all this back and forth shit and you not letting me in?”
She looks away briefly, almost shyly. It’s another thing I love about her. That even when she doesn’t know it, she’s sweet as honey. “I’m scared.” Her voice is soft, but her hands warm on my chest.
“Of me?”
She smiles beautifully, admitting, “No and yes.” I quirk my brow, and she continues. “Yes, because you hold my heart, Green, and I haven’t given it away before.”
“Baby.” I pull her to me and kiss her softly. “You have nothin’ to fear. I’ll keep it safe.”
“There’s another reason for yes,” she says, pulling back. “I’m afraid you’ll see my body and change you
r mind about me. That you’ll think I’m hideous and run as fast as possible away from me.”
“Those are your fears talkin’, and we need to push them away. Far, far away.” I brush a stray lock from her hair. “I’ve already told you what I think about your scars. You’re beautiful, Leah. Always have been, always will be.”
Tears roll down her cheeks. “I’m sorry.”
“No more of that. Let me show you how beautiful I think you are.” I pull her to me, tasting her and loving her with my lips. I’ll damn sure show her how I feel.
20
Leah
Green’s lips are dominant and loving as he coaxes mine open. I climb up his body and straddle him, with our tongues dancing and my hands at the back of his neck. We’ve kissed many times but have never taken it any further, and I’m scared to death to. It’s like I’m a teenager getting touched for the first time. Except this time, it’s someone I truly, utterly, care about and I don’t want to scare him away. That would break me more than what those men did to me.
I’m apprehensive, but my need is greater.
His hand sweeps up my body, coming to the hem of my shirt. Warmth touches my bare skin and I jolt away from him, panic and fear taking over.
“You trust me?”
The lump in my throat is hard to swallow, but I get it down. The fear. The anxiety. The worry. “With everything.” He catches my meaning, if the smile tipping his lips is anything to go by.
“Let me in and I swear you won’t regret it.”
My mind goes back to when I made my decision to come with Green and not letting what happened to dictate my life. If I give into the fear and unknown, I’ll never get to experience life, and that’s what I’m here for. To experience life with Green. My body trembles, but I nod.
