Selfie

by Leslie Johnson

  “Just spit it out already.”

  “Well, after you left Sydney, Hunter didn’t speak to me for a fucking month. I guess he sorta blamed me for what happened between you two. But he’s a good bloke, so he forgave me and we became best mates again. But that whole thing messed him up pretty good. He wasn’t interested in hooking up anymore. Said women bored him.” He barked out a laugh. “For a while there, I thought he was trying to hit on me, you know?”

  I snorted. “You wish.”

  He laughed some more. “Too right. But jokes aside, I’m not his type, yeah? He loves pussy, or should I say” – here, he darted another glance at me – “one particular girl’s pussy. Anyway, we came to L.A., and the women here went bonkers for him. He still wasn’t interested, but some models offered to blow him, and it kinda started from there. He let them blow him, but that was it. He wouldn’t touch them, and he wouldn’t fuck them. But the crazy part was they were okay with it.”

  “Hunter told me this morning,” I interrupted. “This isn’t news to me, Wally.”

  “Hang on. I’m not done yet.” He readjusted his position on the seat, facing me. “For the past year, maybe a bit longer than that, Roxy has been the one blowing him. I’m not kidding when I say she’s crazy possessive of Hunter. She makes sure that no photos of women are uploaded on his Instagram page . . . except for hers, that is. She’s a good agent and has heaps of Hollywood connections, but she’s kinda scary, too. And now that Hunter called you his girlfriend in front of her, and you’ve pretty much thrown down the gauntlet as well . . .”

  I could see where he was going with this. It also dawned on me that the photo I’d seen of the beautiful woman cuddling with Hunter was none other than Roxy. “I’m not worried about her. Frankly, I don’t give a shit.”

  We had reached my apartment building. As I was parking the car up front, I caught Wally staring at a woman standing beside the entrance door. Upon closer inspection, I saw it was Stacy standing there, all wet from the rain. The wet T-shirt only served to make her silicone breasts even more voluptuous. No wonder Wally the perv was gawking at her.

  “Now that’s a nice-looking sheila,” he said hoarsely.

  “Even better than Roxy?”

  My sarcastic tone didn’t go unnoticed. Wally gave me a sheepish grin, rubbing the back of his head.

  “Roxy’s an absolute stunner, no doubt about it. But one glare from her can make my balls shrivel up like dried sultanas.” His eyes traveled over to Stacy, who was squeezing excess water from the hem of her short skirt. “Nah, I prefer cute girls with womanly curves. Like that one over there.”

  His genuine interest in her made me pause. Stacy was one of my closest friends who had been struggling to make ends meet for a while. Wally, on the other hand, was a trust fund baby. And beneath all the facial whiskers and shaggy hair was a face that wasn’t bad-looking, either. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to introduce them.

  “She’s my roommate,” I said wearily, opening the door. “If you want to meet her, then you’d better follow me.”

  We stepped out into the rain and ran toward Stacy, who started waving as soon as she saw me. It turned out she had forgotten her house keys. After a quick introduction, the three of us trod upstairs, soaked from head to toe. Behind me, I could hear Wally trying to flirt with Stacy as he thickened his Aussie accent for her benefit. Rolling my eyes, I opened the apartment door and entered in.

  And walked in on Lorenzo spooning an emotional stranger on our worn leather sofa.

  Chapter 11

  “Oops, sorry for interrupting.” I called out, ducking past my roommate. Stacy immediately caught on and trailed after me, but we stopped when Wally simply stood there, all agog at the scene before him.

  “What are you blokes up to?” he asked in open fascination.

  The stranger, suddenly looking embarrassed, sat up and wiped his eyes. “I should go. My wife’s probably wondering where I am.” He reached for his wallet. “How much do I owe you?”

  “Two hundred dollars,” Lorenzo replied, lying on his side like a mermaid. He accepted the money and nodded at his client. “I’ll see you next week, Ronald.”

  Ronald squeaked out his thanks and hurried out of the apartment, eager to get away from the newcomers.

  For a brief moment, the four of us stared at one another – or rather, Stacy, Lorenzo, and I stared at Wally, who had the most curious expression on his face. He seemed confused, but also weirdly aroused by what he’d witnessed.

  “Lorenzo is a professional cuddler,” I explained before he could say something rude. “And he’s also our roommate. By the way,” I added, hoping to divert Wally’s attention, “did I mention Stacy’s an actress? She’s going to be starring in a new horror film. Tell him, Stace.”

  Stacy’s eyes brightened as she described the plot-starved script in excruciating detail, which took all of two minutes. Wally was practically drinking her in, and I couldn’t blame him. With her wet bleached hair, wet T-shirt clinging to her massive boobs, and short skirt accentuating her round arse, she was the epitome of every pimply-faced boy’s wet dream.

  Wally ended up staying until dinner, glued to Stacy’s side. The trust fund baby and the aspiring actress . . . by all accounts, it was a match made in, if not heaven, then the next best thing – the city of angels.

  Around eleven at night, there was a knock on my bedroom door, followed by Stacy poking her head in.

  “Are you asleep?”

  “No, why?”

  She immediately ran over and bounced on my bed, shaking a stapled bunch of papers in my face. “I need your help. You know I have that crucial scene tomorrow, right? The one where I’m in the woods, all naked and glistening with sweat?” Her eyes narrowed. “My stupid co-star says I’m not convincing enough, whatever that means. He thinks our simulated sex feels robotic.”

  I didn’t like where this was going. “Listen, Stace, you know I love slasher films, and I’m really looking forward to the red carpet premiere of Werewolves of Tahoe. But maybe you should ask Lorenzo instead.”

  She snorted. “He’s going to take advantage of that and grope me for real. You know that.”

  Unfortunately, I did. With a resigned sigh, I took the stapled papers and flicked to the tenth page, where Stacy had folded the top corner. I quickly scanned the lines.

  “Okay, so a bunch of friends are camping in the forest.” She quickly explained to me. “They’ve already had dinner, and the campfire’s still lit. Two other couples take off to swim in the lake, so it’s just Lance and my character Kat. And this is where our scene begins.” When I stared at her woefully, Stacy smiled and crawled over to straddle me.

  “Baby, you look hot tonight,” I read, shifting uncomfortably as Stacy began grinding on my thigh. “Take that skimpy top off, Kat. Let me see your girls.”

  And so began Stacy’s striptease. For real. I was speechless when she actually pulled off her nightshirt, revealing her fake breasts in all their naked glory. Jeez, but they were huge. I found myself staring at them, amazed by how round they were.

  “You like that, baby?” she said in a husky, sexy voice, grabbing my hand and pressing it to her breast. She was writhing on me now, leaning closer.

  Shit, we’re having simulated sex! my mind screamed. My eyes fell on the page again.

  “Ah, fuck, that’s g-good,” I stuttered, forcing myself to focus on the dialogue. “Come closer, babe, let me gobble up your nipples.” That line instantly turned me off, and I pulled back, glaring up at Stacy. “Don’t even think that I’m going to ‘gobble up your nipples.’ And who wrote this shitty script, anyway? Am I supposed to be the boyfriend or the sleazy giant from a porn version of Jack and the Beanstalk? Fee-fi-fo-fum, let me gobble up your bum!”

  Stacy’s eyes remained closed. “Just focus on the script, damn it!” She was “in the zone,” so to speak, and had no patience for my bitching.

  Soon, more “orgasmic” groans followed, and then Stacy cried out, “I’m almost there! Bab
y, ahhh! Ohhhhh!” She bounced heavily on my lap, making her massive breasts bounce in tandem with her frenzied movements. I grunted when one of her boobs slapped my chin, which quickly became a breathless squeal as her erect nipple poked me in the eye. If she’d abused her co-star this way, no wonder he had voiced complaints.

  “For fuck’s sake, Stace!” I said, clutching my eye in pain. “Stop bouncing on my thighs, will you?”

  Breathless and contrite, she stopped to examine my sore eye. “It’s a little red, but you’ll be fine.” Hesitation flickered across her face, a rare emotion for someone who normally oozed so much confidence. “So . . . what do you think? Compliments? Criticisms? Don’t worry about hurting me. I’m a big girl; I can take it.”

  “Well,” I said, blinking rapidly, “the positive first. Your boobs are going to look great on camera.”

  Stacy beamed with pleasure.

  “And now the negative, which can be easily fixed.” I chose my words carefully. “Your problem isn’t that you’re robotic. It’s that you’re overdoing it. Just take it down a notch, and this scene will be sexy as hell. I promise.”

  “That’s it, then?” Stacy looked hopefully at me.

  “I think so. Just be natural tomorrow, and do what feels sexy to you. Don’t worry about the others.”

  That was enough to put Stacy’s mind at ease. After giving me a grateful hug, she returned to her bedroom to continue practicing for her big scene tomorrow. I plumped up my pillows and fell across them, relieved and exhausted. Today had been a pretty tiring day.

  I was on the verge of sleep when my cell phone buzzed on the nightstand, startling me awake. I snatched the phone up, growing irritated when I didn’t recognize the number. Getting perverted prank calls from friends and strangers alike was something I’d gotten used to over the years, but I just wasn’t in an indulgent mood tonight.

  “Listen, creep,” I snarled into the phone, “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but I’m wearing long johns. Yes, I wear them even during summers! And they’re a horrible bright red. I also have granny panties on, so you can stop breathing like a perverted freak and – hello? Hello? Why are you laughing, creep? And how did you get my number?”

  “I got it from Wally, who got it from your roommate Stacy after they texted non-stop for the past twenty minutes,” Hunter replied, still laughing. “Seriously, though. Long johns?”

  I lay back down, feeling giddy at the sound of his voice. His call was a most welcome surprise.

  “Actually, I’m naked,” I lied, smiling as I glanced down at my tank top and shorts. “But I couldn’t tell a perverted prankster that, could I?”

  “Naked?” Hunter’s breath quickened. “Are you in bed?”

  “Of course. And the bedroom window is wide open. Anyone in the adjacent building can look in and see me playing with my breasts.”

  Hunter didn’t like that at all. “Turn off the lights, geek. Your body is for my personal viewing only. Got that?”

  “Got it.” I murmured, reaching over to turn off the bedside lamp. Darkness washed over me, but the full moon outside cast a dull glow around the room. Feeling deliciously naughty, I slipped off my shorts and panties, then pushed up my tank top to expose my breasts. A soft moan escaped from my throat as I reached up and pinched an aching nipple.

  “Are you touching yourself?” Hunter’s voice was thick with desire.

  “Hmm, yes.” I squeezed my left breast, arching my back.

  “Tell me what you’re doing.”

  I let out another moan. “I’m fingering my clit now.” Spreading my legs a little wider, I swept a finger down my tender folds to open them. I was already wet with arousal.

  Hunter groaned into my ear. “Roe, you’re fucking killing me over here.” His heavy breathing told me he was also playing along. I pictured him lying on that king-sized bed of his, his fingers wrapped around his massive hard-on. The image alone made my pussy throb with desperate need.

  “Hunter.” I panted, rolling onto my stomach and grinding on my hand, “I need you inside me. So much.”

  “I know, babe, I know. I’ve already waited five fucking years. How the bloody hell am I supposed to wait until Tuesday to see you?” He was pumping faster now, groaning with the effort. “You should have let me fuck you in the car. I can’t believe you made me stop.”

  “Shut up about that.” I gritted out, although I heartily agreed with him. My muscles coiled tightly before the most wonderful orgasm surged through my body. I cried out into the pillow, continuing to writhe on my slick hand as my pussy contracted from the intense release.

  Seconds later, Hunter groaned loudly, joining me in our shared pleasure. I reveled in the sounds he made because I knew that they were all for me. Closing my eyes, I pretended that we were lying beside each other as I listened to Hunter taking deep, calming breaths.

  “What should we do on Tuesday?” he asked once he was able to speak.

  I glanced outside the window, still playing with my breasts. “First, you’re going to take me to an expensive, romantic restaurant. Then afterwards, you’re going to kick Wally out so that we can have the penthouse all to ourselves.”

  “Sounds like an awesome plan,” he said, laughing, but his tone quickly grew serious. “The last time we were on a lunch date, I bought you a cheap doner kebab, and that ended with you running out on me.” He paused briefly. “Let’s make it work this time, all right?”

  “I didn’t run out on you because you bought me a cheap doner kebab,” I said, indignant. “I left because I thought you’d taken my virginity for your own pride and ego. Another notch on your bedpost, so to speak.”

  “And do you still think that?” he demanded. “After all this time?”

  “No,” I said softly, recalling what Wally had told me earlier in the day. Also, time and age had given me a clearer perspective, allowing me to see that Hunter had been truthful all along. That he’d never been part of that stupid bet in the first place. That he had actually cared about me.

  “Hunter . . .” I trailed off, wondering how I was going to address the issue of Roxy without sounding like an insecure schoolgirl. “When I met Roxy in the lobby today, you introduced me as your girlfriend.” I bit my bottom lip nervously. “What did that mean?”

  “It means that you and I are officially in a relationship. You’re stuck with me now, geek.”

  A long time ago, I’d told myself that guys like Hunter didn’t date girls like me. I had learned to accept it. And I’d lied to myself that guys like him weren’t even my type to begin with, anyway, so I wasn’t going to waste my precious time on them.

  But the truth was, the moment I’d first laid my eyes on him in that lecture hall, sitting right at the back with his popular friends, I had a sinking feeling that he would become the unattainable type that I would pine for during my uni years and pretty much the rest of my life. It would become my sad reality.

  So officially being declared Hunter’s girl made me feel as though I was caught in some twilight zone. But it was a world I never ever wanted to leave.

  “Hey.” He murmured, snapping me back to attention. “You’re pretty quiet there. What are you thinking about?”

  “Many things, Roxy being the main one.” After a pause, I added hesitantly, “Wally told me she’s really possessive of you.”

  He blew out an annoyed breath. “Fuck, he has a big mouth on him. I’m guessing that slacker also told you about the sort of relationship I had with her?”

  “Without going into too many details, yes.” Which I had appreciated, to be honest. And I certainly didn’t want Hunter to get all graphic as he explained the little “arrangement” they’d had.

  “I put a stop to that months ago because it started to feel weird. Look, this is going to sound terrible, but at the time, she was convenient, you know? Always around, taking care of my modeling and acting gigs. And then one day, she offered to –”

  “Okay, that’s enough,” I interrupted, feeling sick and a bit jealous. “Just
promise me this arrangement is over. That the only relationship you have with her now is a professional one.”

  “It’s been over for a good while,” he replied firmly. “Don’t worry about it.”

  That was all I needed to hear. Feeling better, I began to touch my breasts again, a small smile on my face.

  “Guess what I’m doing?” I murmured, letting out a soft moan as I pinched my nipples into hardened peaks. Feeling incredibly raunchy and turned on, I repositioned myself so that my bare pussy was facing the open window. If any creep with night-vision goggles looked this way, he was going to get an eyeful for sure.

  “Tell me.” Hunter’s demand was thick with arousal.

  We spent the next hour or so touching ourselves, listening to our rapid breathing and orgasmic moans as we exchanged dirty talk about what we wanted to do to the other.

  And that was how we spent our “first night” together as an official couple.

  Chapter 12

  Monday morning and afternoon dragged on more than usual, worsened by the fact that Helen Archer was suffering from severe writer’s block and taking it out on me. She sent me on so many errands that by the time it was 2 p.m., there was a huge blister growing on my big toe. The instant I returned to the office, I slipped off my heels and plopped into my chair, enjoying the cooling air on my sweaty skin. My growling stomach reminded me that I’d missed lunch.

  I munched on an old peanut butter cookie as I thought about last night. Frankly, I was still in disbelief that Hunter was mine. Only I would get to touch that stunning man and feel him inside me, and vice versa. No one else. Just the thought alone made gooseflesh break out on my arms.

  At around 4 p.m., I decided that I couldn’t wait one more day to see Hunter. I had to see him tonight. My body was aching so much that I could barely concentrate on my work. I closed my eyes, a small groan escaping from my lips as I recalled how he had touched me as I straddled him in the car. I was already growing wet just thinking about it.