Ember

by Rachel Van Dyken

  “You sure?”

  I worked the towel harder against the ceramic. “Yup.”

  “Careful, liar pants,” Mo whispered, taking the plate from my hands. “You’re going to rub a hole through the already dry plate.”

  Trace leaned back against the counter. “He’s fragile, Bee. You know that, right?”

  I fought the urge to roll my eyes. “Trust me, I practically live with him. I know all about how you guys feel.”

  “It’s not just us,” Mo defended. “It’s everyone. Yes, he’s fine… for now, but what happens when something sets him off? What happens when he gets pissed? He’s a time bomb, Bee. It’s good for you to remember that.”

  Angry, I threw the towel against the counter. “Why don’t you guys just lay off him already! He can’t be better when everyone who supposedly cares for him keeps making him feel like crap all the time!”

  Mo’s eyes almost bugged out of her head while Trace grinned at me like I’d just proclaimed undying love.

  “So…” Trace smiled wider. “…you like him.”

  “No…” I crossed my arms defiantly. “…I love him.”

  Trace stopped smiling, and Mo took a step back from me like I was diseased.

  “You love who?” Tex asked from the doorway behind me.

  My heart stopped. I gave a pleading look to Mo, who immediately flashed Tex a smile and said, “You. She loves you… though it still escapes me why.”

  He rolled his eyes then crooked his finger. “Come here, baby.”

  “No.”

  “Now, damn it.”

  “Campisis…” She flounced across the room. “…so demanding.”

  He pulled her into his arms and kissed her hard on the mouth.

  Trace put her hand on my shoulder and whispered, “I’m happy for him… for you both. I really am.”

  Guilt slammed into me. “But he… I know what he did.” I hung my head.

  “Did,” Trace repeated. “Past tense. If I can get beyond it, then so should Tex. Just… give him time before you start making it known and popping out kids.”

  I laughed with her.

  And then choked on that same laugh.

  Kids.

  That morning.

  Phoenix had said we hadn’t used protection. He’d been worried about STDs… but he’d never said anything about pregnancy.

  I briefly touched my flat stomach.

  Once. Once wouldn’t be enough, would it? The last thing I needed to do was freak him out by bringing it to his attention. We were probably fine, but Trace was right; Tex would freak.

  We needed more time together before we announced it to everyone. And a part of me felt like Phoenix and I deserved a bit of normal before my brother went and ruined everything again by being himself.

  “Bee,” Tex said, releasing Mo and sauntering over to me, “Phoenix has strict instructions. You’ll go back to school, but he doesn’t leave your side. You have to go pee, you raise your hand, he freaking follows you to the stall and sings to you if you get stage fright. He’s also going to sleep on your floor…” The last part made his jaw clench. “…not that I’m happy about it, but it’s better than you being by yourself, and I don’t want to take any chances. We’re going on total lockdown until I have both Pike’s and Nick’s heads. Alright?”

  “Alright.” I agreed and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Thank you… for protecting me.”

  Tex sighed and lifted me against him, returning my hug with a fierceness I’d never experienced from him before. “Bee, next to Mo, you’re my life. I’d do anything to keep you safe.”

  “I know.” That was what I was afraid of.

  Because, according to Tex, Phoenix was anything but safe. He was fire itself. And I was playing with it, hoping to end up unscathed.

  “Bee.” Phoenix came into the kitchen. “You ready to go?”

  “Yeah.” I nodded. “I have an afternoon class, after all.”

  “And your professor’s an ass who gives out tardy slips just because he can,” Sergio sang from the door. “Get a move on. I have to fix my face before my next session.”

  “Can’t fix ugly.” Tex whistled under his breath.

  “One day…” Sergio swore. “…I’m going to grab your balls and twist.”

  “Just try not to enjoy it too much, Serg.” Tex winked.

  Sergio lunged, but Phoenix held him back. “Alright, family breakfast is over.”

  CHAPTER FORTY

  I’d waited for death my whole life. Now that it was here? Kind of anticlimactic.

  Sergio

  MY LIFE WAS OVER.

  I was finally forced to face my own impending demise, and it wasn’t pretty. There would be no come-to-Jesus moment, no light, nothing. Just blackness and a sickening feeling that I was leaving a horrible legacy behind.

  They’d remember me for my betrayal.

  And they’d be right to.

  I hung my head in my hands as students started shuffling into the classroom. My heart wasn’t in it, not that I’d been enthusiastic about teaching US History, but at least it gave me a purpose outside of the family, outside of my job with the FBI.

  Shit.

  Nixon was going to shoot me in the head. Execution style.

  I couldn’t fix it.

  And the worse part was Phoenix knew who I used to work for; he knew all the dirty secrets because, once upon a time, I was the man who needed saving, not Phoenix.

  Once upon a time.

  Luca had saved me too.

  “You have two choices, son.” Luca held the gun to my temple; his finger squeezed the trigger. “Shall I lay them out for you?”

  I said nothing.

  “I pay some people off… but I own you. I own your very soul. Not the Abandonatos, not the Alferos, but me. I’m your boss, Sergio. My family is your family. I get you out of this… predicament, clean up the mess you handled so horribly.” He sighed, pulling the gun away. “Do we have a deal?”

  “You can’t.” I shook my head and looked around at the dead bodies scattered at our feet. “You can’t just walk into the FBI and say I screwed up.”

  “Whoever said you screwed up?” He balked then pointed his gun at the dead bodies. Over and over again, he fired until no shots were left. “Looks like the Nicolasi boss was at it again… I’m ever so… trigger happy.” His grin was ruthless. “Now, run back to your shiny little office and tell them you want to be activated… tell them your family trusts you again. They want you in. You are a ghost no longer, Sergio. From here on out, you’re a double agent.”

  “But Nixon—”

  “Will be fine.”

  I had no choice. Either take the fall for all the dead federal agents around me, or go back, blame it on the Nicolasi family and solidify myself as a trustworthy federal agent, and go deep under cover within the family.”

  Either way, I was a dead man.

  “Fine,” I snapped. “I’ll do it.”

  “Of course, you will…” Luca grinned menacingly. “Because blood always wins, doesn’t it?”

  “Wow, you’re either really deep in thought or your dog died this morning.” Andi knocked on my desk with her fingers and grinned.

  “I don’t like pets.”

  “Shocker.” She winked. “Though it would probably be good for you to hug something other than your own pillow at night.”

  “Keep going. You’re just begging me to kick you out of class, Andi.” I was pissed, pissed that I was dying and so was she; yet a smile — a freaking smile — and jokes? Unbelievable.

  She leaned in, her eyelashes fanning across her face. “One day… you’ll regret pushing me away. One day, very soon, you’ll be eating your words.”

  My head snapped up. Was a student actually threatening me? My eyes narrowed as she crossed her arms.

  “Find your seat, Miss Smith.”

  She shrugged and walked off.

  Leaving me even more irritated than before. Class went by in a blur. I said all the right things,
assigned homework, then locked the door when my phone rang.

  “Next week,” the voice said. “…make sure he’s present. We’ll do the rest.”

  “And if I can’t get him there?” I asked.

  “You can… unless you’re in too deep. Are you?”

  “No,” I barked. “I can do it.”

  “Great, we’ll hand him exactly what he wants in return for something we want. No lives need to be lost.”

  “No. But they will be lost, won’t they?”

  “What’s one person in the grand scheme of things?”

  “Right.” I hung up my phone and stared at the door. I was going to lead my friends, my family, into a trap.

  And now that Phoenix had finally found life…

  I was going to deal him his death.

  How was that for irony?

  CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

  I want him — badly. Every second. Of every day. My world is Phoenix.

  Bee

  CLASS HAD BEEN ABSOLUTE torture. I didn’t realize that one experience with Phoenix would make it so the whole world could crumble around me, and I’d still only be focused on his lips, his rough hands.

  By the time we made it to the car, I was so elated I could have skipped.

  I think Phoenix was trying to play it off like being around me wasn’t a big deal. At least, I hoped that’s what he was doing. I couldn’t really tell since his face had remained expressionless all through class.

  He opened my door for me and ushered me in.

  When the car started, I sighed and leaned back against the smooth leather. “So, what’s the plan?”

  “The plan?” he repeated, his eyebrows arching. “We drive home, you do your homework, and, if you’re really good, I let you have ice cream with dinner.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Same old Grandpa Phoenix.”

  “Grandpa?” His voice rose. “Did you just call me a grandpa?”

  “Quick! Turn on Mozart before I start rapping!” I fumbled with the controls and turned on the classical music. “Ah, isn’t that better?”

  He opened his mouth, but I interrupted him.

  “But wait… maybe my shirt’s too open again. I know how you feel about buttons.” I undid the first two then the third. “Whoops, going the wrong way.”

  The car swerved. “Could you not?”

  “What? Trouble concentrating, Grandpa?”

  “Holy shit, stop taunting me! So what if I like classical music.”

  “Liar… you hate it.”

  “It’s…” He coughed. “…educational.”

  “Favorite composer—”

  “Mo—”

  “Other than Mozart.”

  “Uh…” He blinked. “…you’re just putting too much pressure on me.”

  “Alzheimer’s already getting to you?”

  “For the love of God, stop saying I’m old!”

  “I almost bought you a cane then realized you’d actually use it… not spank me with it so…”

  The car swerved again, and then we were in an abandoned field, still three miles from home.

  I didn’t have time to yell at him for nearly killing us — or the corn.

  Because within seconds, his mouth was on mine, and he was undoing my seatbelt. “Damn, you drive me crazy.”

  “A good crazy.

  He grunted against my neck. “I’m still deciding.”

  “Can we make all big decisions this way?” I wasn’t against begging, especially when his hands found my breasts and started massaging.

  “Whatever you want, it’s yours.” His hungry gaze met mine briefly before he kissed me again, his tongue tangling against mine, his body not nearly close enough.

  I tugged him harder against me. The console kept getting in the way.

  I growled.

  He laughed at me.

  I bit his lower lip.

  And all laughing stopped as his hands dove into my hair.

  I tried to move so I could straddle him, but it was like the car was working against us.

  “Home,” he said against my lips. “Wait until we get home.”

  “No.” I tugged his shirt, nearly ripping it form his body. “Now.”

  “Bee…” His voice had a warning edge to it. “…pretty sure your brother’s already going to put a shotgun-sized hole in my chest. Don’t make him run me over with a car for good measure because I felt the need to pull you into the back seat.”

  “Ooo, back seat! Good idea.” I started to move.

  Phoenix groaned and buckled my seatbelt back up. “Stay.”

  “Boo. You’re no fun.”

  “Oh, I’m loads of fun — when I’m living. And I won’t be living if your brother happens to drive by.”

  “You could always run through the corn.”

  “Not how I envisioned telling him, Bee.”

  “Wait, what?” He pulled the car out of the field and started driving back toward the house. “You’re going to tell him? About us?”

  Phoenix sighed, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. “Bee, I can’t be that guy… I’m not that guy. I refuse to go behind his back just because I’m afraid of him spilling my blood.”

  “But—” Panicked, I reached for his hand. “—Phoenix… he’ll kill you.”

  “You’re worth that risk, Bee.”

  Suddenly embarrassed, I shuddered, despite the warmth invading my face. “Are you going to tell him about last night?”

  “Hell, no.” Phoenix swore. “Last night was about you and me, Bee — not your brother, the mafia, or anyone else in this godforsaken world. Just you and me…”

  “And birds.” I laughed.

  He groaned. “The word bird should never give a man an erection, Bee. Ever.”

  “Aww… having a rough time when they chirp by your window?”

  He shook his head. “Yeah, something like that.”

  When he put the car in park, I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. “My room… five minutes.”

  “Bee—” Phoenix gripped my arm. “—we have to be careful. Sergio…”

  “Isn’t even here.” I pointed to the empty parking spot. “He drives his Lexus to school, and it’s still not here. Therefore, we’re alone, though you should probably make sure those cameras aren’t on in my room.”

  He let out a heavy sigh. “They’re going to put on my tombstone… And he loved her so much he never said no.”

  “Good.” I grinned like a happy fool and marched off to my room, getting rid of my school clothes and getting ready for more bouts with Phoenix, my best friend turned…

  Everything.

  CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

  Big Bird. Funny, I never thought yellow would cause me to lose my mind.

  Phoenix

  I WAS ABOUT TO knock on her door like an idiot, when it swung open. Bee was on the other side in shorts that had Big Bird on them and a white tank top.

  “Ah, so now it’s going to be Sesame Street that does it,” I muttered, running my hands through my hair. It was all so new to me. Having a girl I loved, spending time with her, not puking after sex.

  I’d never spent the night in another woman’s arms.

  Until Bee.

  She tilted her head, her pouty lips taunting me by merely existing.

  I slammed the door behind me and picked her up into my arms, my mouth finding hers in seconds.

  “I love you…” The words rumbled from my chest. “…more than anything.”

  “I love you too.” She hooked her feet around my waist. “Now kiss me, Phoenix.”

  “I am.”

  She ground her body against mine. “Harder.”

  “Damn, you’re not easy to please,” I grumbled, kissing her so hard my lips were going to be bruised in the morning. I’d forgotten to shave, so I knew she was going to be tender around her mouth from the force of my kiss, but I couldn’t stop, didn’t want to.

  When I tossed her onto the bed, everything was fine.

  And then…


  All hell broke loose as an image of another girl flashed through my brain. Horrified, I backed away from Bee.

  The girl had worn a white tank top just like Bee’s.

  I shook my head, bile rising in my throat.

  “Nope.” Bee clung to me and brought my face down to hers. “Stay here… with me. It’s just me, Phoenix.”

  “But—”

  “Let it go.” She sighed, running her hands through my hair. “It’s us, only us. Make love to me.”

  I sighed as the heaviness started to peel away from my body. She was right. Her, I could focus on her — on pleasing her, on her pleasure, on her body.

  “A man could die worshipping your body, Bee.”

  “Are we back to the grandpa theory again?” she teased, tugging my bottom lip with her teeth. “Don’t go having heart failure.”

  “At least I know I have a heart now,” I confessed.

  “Of course you do.” She gripped my face with her hands. “But I’ve always known that.”

  “Even before I did,” I whispered hoarsely.

  “I’m the smart Campisi.” She winked and then glanced around the room. “Tell me you took care of the cameras.”

  I rolled my eyes. “The very second we got back to the house. Nixon already destroyed the others. Thank God.”

  “Nixon knows?”

  “Yeah…” I cringed. “…so does Chase.”

  “What the heck, Phoenix!” She smacked me in the chest. “When were you planning on telling me?”

  “That would be never.” I hovered over her and kissed her neck. “They won’t say a word, at least not yet, and maybe, possibly, when Tex aims his gun for my head, they’ll defend me.”

  “Mmm…” Her body arched off the bed as I tugged her tank top away and stared greedily at her naked body. “…it feels good when you look at me like that.”

  “I’ll make you feel better than good,” I vowed, kissing her again, removing every article of clothing and showing her over and over again that I wasn’t who I used to be. I’d been reborn.

  I was hers.

  Owned completely by Bee Campisi.

  CHAPTER FORTY-THREE

  Coming clean