Stand-In Father (Intimate Moments)

by Warren, Pat

  And the boy, God how he hated to leave Ryan. Remembering the pain he’d put on that small, innocent face tore him up. He’d make it up to Ryan and to his mother, Alex vowed as he shifted gears. As he drove out of the parking lot, he glanced again at Delaney’s Bed & Breakfast

  “I’ll be back,” he said over the roar of his engine. “Just you wait and see.”

  Chapter 12

  It wasn’t Alex’s habit to talk to himself. But there were exceptions and today was one of them.

  “Damn stubborn woman,” he muttered as he swung onto Highway 5 South. “It’s her pride. I know it is. She refuses to listen because of her pride.”

  Suddenly aware that he had the wheel in a white-knuckle grip, he forced himself to relax and to ease up on the gas pedal, as well. He didn’t need a speeding ticket right now to complicate his life.

  Sitting back, he relived his last conversation with Megan, trying to see if he could have said something, done something differently, to make her understand. He could think of nothing, short of throwing her over his shoulder and hauling her off upstairs to her room. Maybe that’s what he should have done. Despite her anger and her hurt feelings, even she admitted they were compatible in bed. Maybe after a bout of good sex, she’d have listened.

  He dismissed the thought almost as soon as it formed. That wouldn’t work with Megan, and they’d both feel cheap afterward. He needed to let her be, to allow her to look at their situation from all angles. She was a fair-minded person. She’d see in time that he’d been well-intentioned if a bit misguided. She’d give him a second chance. She wouldn’t throw away their future happiness for the sake of wounded pride.

  Would she?

  Alex signaled, then pulled into the left lane to pass a lumbering eighteen-wheeler. How could he convince her that he loved her, wanted to marry her? She’d wanted that, too, she’d said. Perhaps her love wasn’t really that strong after all.

  No, he was certain it was. Megan was just too wounded to see the big picture right now. She’d come around in time. He’d see to it, even if he did have to resort to caveman tactics.

  Grim-faced, Alex pressed down on the gas, anxious to get home.

  Grace gave a short knock on Megan’s bedroom door, then walked in. “Honey, are you all right?”

  Sitting in the rocker and staring into space, Megan nodded. Her tears had dried up, leaving her feeling numb.

  Walking into the dim room with the blinds slanted nearly closed, Grace was at least relieved that her friend wasn’t crying. She sat down on the edge of Megan’s bed. “I thought you might want to talk it out.”

  Her voice sounding as if it belonged to a stranger, Megar told Grace about the list and what Alex’s father had done. And about Alex’s deception. “The surgery switch wasn’t his fault. But how could he stay here with us, make us care for him, get me involved, and even worse, get Ryan to open up to him, all based on a lie? He doesn’t want us. He wants to ease his conscience.”

  Grace leaned forward. “Are you sure about that? I mean, it’s hard to fake things for as long as Alex did. Maybe writing those checks and buying a dryer was atoning some. But reading books with Ryan, going to ball games, building model cars. That’s a little above and beyond, don’t you think?”

  Megan wasn’t buying. “He looked on himself as a stand-in father because he feels he got the transplant that belonged to Ryan’s dad. He took it a step further and became a replacement husband, helping the poor widow woman to cope. Instead of tea and sympathy, he offered sex and household repairs. The savior of the nineties.”

  “You’re sounding very bitter, and maybe you have a right to be,” Grace told her. “But we have to look at his intentions here. Do you think he set out to hurt you or Ryan?”

  “Doesn’t matter. Results are the same. A man driving maniacally doesn’t set out to hurt anyone, but he usually does. Same thing.”

  “I think you’re wrong, Megan, and I seldom disagree with you.”

  “You have a right to your opinion. He’s charming. He won you over. But he didn’t betray you.” With both hands, Megan pushed back her hair. “I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Alex Shephard is the wrong man for me.”

  “Maybe not. I think Alex is the right man for you. If not for your sake, then for Ryan’s.”

  Megan raised her head. “You want me to marry Alex to make Ryan happy?”

  “No. I want you to make yourself happy, and I have a feeling that involves being with Alex.” Crossing her legs, she propped an elbow on one knee. “Listen for a minute. Alex didn’t have to come back here. Once he found out about Neal spending all the insurance money, he could have just paid those mortgages off, then sent a check every month to ease his conscience. As we discovered, he can well afford it. He didn’t have to help you when you were laid up with that ankle. He didn’t have to sit on those hard bleachers game after game to watch a boy who isn’t his because Ryan asked him to. He didn’t have to build model cars or read stories or spend three days building a tree house. Or work crossword puzzles with a little old lady, which I think also shows his compassionate nature. Usually, men like him, with fat bank accounts, let their checks do their talking. Why do you suppose Alex kept coming back?”

  Megan sat unmoving, thoughtful, silent.

  “I’ll tell you why. Because he loves you and he’s nuts about your son. No other reason fits.” Grace thought of something else. “Do you remember yesterday when Alex talked to Ryan about his fight with Bobby? This is the same as his advice was to the child. Alex did a terrible thing, not telling you sooner about the switch. But Alex isn’t a terrible person. He didn’t think things through. He made a mistake. Don’t we all, occasionally?”

  “When did you become his champion?”

  “When I realized he cared a whole bunch for both of you.”

  If only she could believe all that. Megan leaned her head back. “You know what hurts the most, Grace? He...he was magic. Just being with him was magical.”

  Grace stood, touching the top of her friend’s head gently. “Magic’s powerful stuff. Hurts like hell when it disappears. I know because I’ve been there. But I have a strong hunch you can get that magic back, Megan. Think about it.”

  She drew in a shuddering breath. “I will. Is Ryan back yet? I imagine he’s up in that tree house nursing his own wounds. Would you call him in, Grace? I’ll be down in a minute to talk with him and get some dinner going.”

  “Sure, honey. Take your time.”

  Alex took the bypass through San Clemente and put the Porsche on cruise control, stretching his long legs. It was tension, he knew, causing his muscles to ache. He’d been holding himself as tight as a drum since leaving Twin Oaks. He needed to relax, to take some deep breaths. The doctors had warned him that too much stress could take its toll on his recovery, perhaps even cause a setback, which was the last thing he needed. He’d been doing so well that he didn’t want to mess things up now.

  He really wasn’t hungry, yet he wondered if he should stop to eat before getting home. There probably wouldn’t be anything in the fridge since no one knew he’d be there tonight. Still, he didn’t want to take the time now. He’d pop into a store near his condo and pick up a few things.

  Maybe some music would help his mood, Alex decided. But as he reached toward the knob, he heard a sound from behind him. Pausing, he listened hard. Damn if that hadn’t sounded like a sneeze. And there it was again.

  Something wrong here. Disengaging the cruise control with the brake, he slowed the Porsche and headed for the shoulder.

  “I’ve looked everywhere,” Grace told Megan, her usually unflappable demeanor registering a frightened concern. “Ryan’s not in the tree house, not anywhere on the grounds, and not at Bobby’s. Nowhere in the house. His bike’s still out front.” She threw up her hands. “I just don’t know.”

  Her heart pounding, Megan tried desperately to stay calm. “He never goes off without asking permission or telling me where he’ll be.” But he’d been
so upset about Alex’s leaving, more upset than she’d ever seen him.

  “Mrs. K’s in the lounge, said he hasn’t been in there the whole day.”

  “All right, we have to think. You drive around, head over to the park in case he ran back there. Call out his name as you go. I’m going to check on the hillside, see if he’s brooding up there somewhere. Meet me back here in twenty minutes, okay?” Outwardly, she was the picture of organized serenity. Inside, she was quietly screaming.

  As Grace rushed out front to her car, Megan ran to the footpath leading up the hill. She knew that Ryan went there occasionally to look at the ocean in the distance and to daydream. He was probably there, maybe even hiding from both her and Grace, not wanting to come out until he was over his crying jag.

  That was it, sure. Ryan was at the stage where tears embarrassed him, especially his own. He blamed her for Alex’s leaving, so not only was he sad, he was angry, too, she thought as she climbed, stepping around the rocks. He might have to be coaxed down, reassured.

  But how was she going to reassure him when she had no words to soothe herself?

  “Ryan,” she called out, her voice more shaky than she’d have wished. “Ryan, please come out. I’m sorry you’re hurt. Let me try to explain, please.” She walked on, checking behind the larger bushes, glancing around trees. “Ryan, Ryan.” Dear God, he had to be here somewhere!

  Stepping out of the Porsche, Alex whipped up the leather cover he always kept over his tiny back seat. There, huddled in the small space, was Ryan, curled up into a ball. His face tear-streaked, he looked up at Alex nervously.

  “Don’t be mad at me, please.” Straightening from his cramped position, Ryan squirmed upright.

  “Oh, Ryan.” Alex didn’t know whether to hug the boy or scold him. “Whatever were you thinking, climbing in there?” Offering a hand, he helped the child to climb out.

  Looking alternately dejected and hopeful, Ryan stood his ground. “I didn’t want you to leave. Mom wouldn’t help. She wouldn’t ask you to stay. So I thought if I went with you, I could talk you into going back. I mean, we need you at our place, Alex. It’s no fun when you’re not there. Mom just mopes around and...and...well, you gotta come back!”

  Alex checked his watch. He’d been on the road just over an hour. Knowing Megan, she’d probably notified the police already. “You realize your mom must be frantic by now, not being able to find you?”

  Ryan brightened. “We can call her when we get to your place and tell her that I got you to come back.”

  Hugging the boy to him, holding him close, Alex shook his head. “It’s not that simple, Ryan. She’s undoubtedly very worried and she’s going to be mighty angry when she finds out you’re with me.”

  “But why? She knows I’m safe with you.” Innocent blue eyes questioned his.

  “That’s not it. You left without permission.” Or would Megan think he’d taken her son to make his point? No, surely she wouldn’t.

  “If I’d asked permission, she wouldn’t have let me come. And I wanted to come with you. I wanted to talk you into going back. You can’t leave us, Alex. You can’t!”

  Alex sat down at an angle on the bucket seat, his feet on the ground, face-to-face with the boy. “Your mom doesn’t want me there right now. She’s got some thinking to do and...” Damn if that didn’t sound lame, especially to a small boy. “We have some things to work out.”

  “What things? You love her. You told me so. And I know she loves you. I never saw her act like she does with anyone but you. She’s happy when you’re around and sad when you’re not.” Something occurred to him and a frown appeared on his small face. “Is it me? Don’t you want me?”

  Almost roughly, Alex pulled the boy into a fierce hug. “Never, never think that. I want you all right. And I want your mom, too.”

  Easing back, his eyes questioning, Ryan looked at him. “Then why can’t we all be together?”

  Why, indeed? Boiled down in a child’s simplistic terms, if they all loved one another, why couldn’t they be together? Because two stubborn adults were allowing pride to stand in their way.

  Alex reached for his car phone. “I have to call your mother and let her know you’re all right”

  “Are you going to take me back? Please, Alex, I want to be with you.”

  He could see that Ryan was upset, probably hungry, certainly hot and tired after hiding under that heavy leather cover for over an hour. And maybe scared. Definitely confused. It would take some time to make him understand, to calm his fears. Then tomorrow, after some dinner and a good night’s rest, maybe he and Megan could talk like two reasonable adults.

  “I have to take you back, but not tonight.” Alex dialed the inn’s number.

  The phone was snatched up on the first ring. “Hello?” The voice belonged to Megan but was barely recognizable.

  “Megan, it’s Alex.” Static from the airwaves over a busy highway squawked into his ear, but he felt she could hear him well enough. “Ryan is with me.”

  At the front desk where she’d grabbed the phone, thinking it was the sheriff since she’d finally given in and placed a distraught call to his office, Megan’s heart leaped into her throat. “With you? How... ?”

  “He hid under the cover of my back seat. I didn’t know he was there until a few minutes ago when he sneezed. I know you must be worried—”

  “Worried? I’ve been frantic. Is he all right?”

  “He’s fine. He—”

  “Bring him back, Alex. Please, hurry.” Her hand on her chest where the ache still lingered, Megan drew the first relieved breath in over an hour.

  “He’s pretty tired, Megan, and upset. I’m almost to my condo. I’m going to keep him overnight and take him back in the morning.”

  “No! He’s my son, Alex. You turn around and bring him back this very minute.” Anxiety had her breathing hard again. What was wrong with the man’s thick head?

  Alex tried speaking slowly, calmly. “Didn’t you hear what I said? The boy’s beat. He’s hungry, too. I’m going to get us some dinner, talk with him and have him back before noon tomorrow.”

  Fury rose inside her, strong and sharp. “Listen here, Alex Shephard. You have no right to keep my son from me. I’ve called the sheriff and—”

  “You can call the marines for all I care. But you might want to think this through a bit. Your son hid in my car because he didn’t want me to leave. He needs a little understanding right now, not two people squabbling. I promised him I wouldn’t take him back until morning. I don’t break my promises. We’ll see you tomorrow, Megan.” He disconnected.

  “What’d she say?” Ryan asked, looking worried.

  “She’s still upset, but she’ll be fine.” He stood, indicating the passenger seat. “You might be more comfortable riding the rest of the way over there.”

  Gratefully, Ryan scooted over, reached for the seat belt and buckled himself in. “Is Mom mad at me?”

  “No, she’s mad at me, but she’ll get over it.” He hoped. He handed Ryan his handkerchief, which was getting to be a habit. “Here, wipe your face. And don’t worry. Your mom and I will work things out. Now, what’ll it be—burgers or pizza or chicken?”

  “I like cheeseburgers. And fries. Is that too much?”

  “Not for a growing boy.” Alex smiled and slipped into gear.

  In Twin Oaks, Megan stared at the dead phone in her hand. “He hung up on me,” she said incredulously.

  “Who did?” Grace asked, coming from the kitchen with two glasses of iced tea. She was worried about Megan. If something happened to Ryan, she’d never get over it. “The sheriff?”

  “No, no. I’ve got to call the sheriff and tell him Ryan’s been found.” She turned to her friend. “He hid out in Alex’s car. Can you believe it?”

  “Sure I believe it. I know he’s nuts about Alex. Was that him on the phone?”

  Megan’s lips were a thin line. “Yes, and he refused to bring my son back until morning. Says Ryan’s tired a
nd upset. Then he hung up on me.”

  Grace had a feeling her friend was leaving something out. “Well, makes sense to me. He’s being considerate and giving you both a cooling-off period.” But Megan still looked mad enough to chew nails. “You wouldn’t have caught Neal doing something to inconvenience himself for the sake of the boy. No, sir. He’d have dumped Ryan back here and been on his way. Alex is thinking of Ryan’s feelings. Pretty mature, I’d say.” Strolling off, she wondered if that had been blunt enough.

  Mature, my eyebrow, Megan thought. Selfish, obstinate, arrogant. He wanted things his way and to hell with what she wanted. She was the boy’s mother, but Alex was deciding what Ryan needed. He needs a little understanding right now. What did he think she was going to do? Give Ryan a thrashing? She didn’t believe in spankings. There were better, more effective ways of punishing children, like removing privileges.

  Not that Ryan deserved drastic punishment for this, although he’d easily taken a year off her life. However, she truly understood why he’d done it. He loved Alex and didn’t want to lose him. And he blamed his mother for Alex’s departure. She—The ringing phone stopped her racing thoughts.

  “Hello?”

  The voice was deep and somewhat gruff. “Ms. Delaney, this is Sheriff Collins. My deputy tells me you called, that little Ryan’s run off and he’s missing?”

  “Oh, Sheriff, I’m sorry to have bothered you. We’ve found Ryan, thank goodness.” She felt contrite and a shade stupid for calling for help so soon.

  “No problem, ma’am. Happens a lot. Kids that age often run away to punish their parents, don’t you know. Glad he’s back.”

  “Yes, thank you.” Slowly, she hung up. Kids run away to punish their parents. Was that what Ryan was doing? Punishing her for causing Alex to leave? In the boy’s mind, Megan was certain that she wore a black hat while Alex had on a big white one.