Fallen Grace

by M. Lauryl Lewis

  “Not while I’m around.”

  “We should grab a few more,” I suggested. “Boggs? Mind grabbing these from me and we’ll bring four more in?”

  He looked at me sideways, obviously not liking that I’d be alone with Gus while he carried the water inside. After a moment, he walked to me and took the bottles from my hands. “Sure.”

  As I watched the three others walk back toward the entry to the bunker, I slid my hand into Gus’. Once the others were a distance away, I turned to face him. His hand was warm in mine, his life force working its way up my arm in a slight tingle.

  “Marnie said you were gathering eggs.”

  He gripped my hand firmly and pulled me toward him. “Ayup.”

  “Did you get any?”

  “Ayup.” He kissed me sweetly on the cheek. “Ten in all.” His lips moved to mine, lightly and briefly. “Let’s get the water and head back inside. I’m starving.”

  “Mm hmm,” I answered.

  We walked back down the hill together and untied four jugs that were gathered in a pile with several others. They had been secured together with twine. I filled them while Gus watched. I had woken stiff and slightly achy all over, and moving around felt good. Once I was done, we each carried two back to the top of the hill and across the flat expanse that led to the secret entry to the basement.

  “I’ll go first, darlin’ and you can hand the water down to me.”

  “’Kay.”

  He quickly ducked down into the opening in the ground and I handed down the water bottles one at a time. After the fourth I slid down into the darkness and dankness of the hole and instantly wished I could stay outside longer, despite the threat of rain.

  “Gus?” I called, not quite sure where he was.

  “Just over here setting the water aside, baby.”

  “Ready for me to close the opening?”

  “You bet. We should all be down here, so go ahead and fasten it shut.”

  “Will do.”

  I peeked my head back outside and located the board that would cover the opening. It was thick plywood that had been covered in roofing shingles, followed by camouflage netting with fabric leaves scattered about. It wasn't large but was on the heavy side. I struggled to drag it into place, where it fit tightly onto a makeshift wooden edge that had been fastened around the entry as a stopper. Two lengths of metal chain were looped on the sides of the rectangular lid as handles, which hung down above me. Two more lengths of chain hung down from the frame that the lid sat upon, which I looped through the handles and secured onto two hooks.

  “Must be Danny’s handiwork,” said Gus. “Kids got some good ideas.”

  “Looks pretty secure, huh?”

  “Ayup. They all seem like good people too.”

  “Think we’ll stay here awhile?” I asked. I was actually hoping so.

  “Might be a good idea. Spring’s almost here and they have some great plans for concealed gardens. Plenty of fishing nearby .”

  “Ya. I really like them. Let’s go eat.”

  He grabbed me suddenly, wrapping his arms around me tightly. Before I could respond, his mouth was on mine, kissing me deeply. I could sense his desire to make love to me again.

  “We can’t, Gus,” I said, breathlessly. “Not here.”

  “You have no idea how much you drive me wild, do you?”

  He kissed me again, this time pulling me onto his lap. The space was crowded and darkness surrounded us. I returned his kiss and felt his desire press against me.

  “You’re just horny,” I mumbled.

  “You know it,” he said as he began lifting my shirt.

  “It’s cold here,” I moaned as his warm hands worked their way over my skin.

  “Want me to stop?”

  I didn’t answer. Instead, I helped him pull his pants down and leaned down, taking him into my mouth. I could feel his body tense as I began sucking on him, making the strokes with my mouth long and slow.

  “Oh Lord,” he whimpered. “Have mercy!”

  I teased him with my tongue while running a hand through the soft hair above his cock.

  “Fucking A, Zoe.”

  He wrapped my hair around his fingers gently while I maneuvered my mouth, tugging gently at the loose braid on the back of my head. His breathing quickened as his grip on my hair tightened.

  “Darlin’, I can’t hold it much longer…so unless you want me to…”

  I took heed of his warning and backed my head away. I kept a hand on him and continued to stroke. He wrapped one of his hands around mine and guided my motions. In short order, he groaned and I felt warmth spread over my hand as he emptied himself.

  “Thank you,” he panted. “Here, use my shirt,” he offered.

  I took it, gratefully, and cleaned my hand off. We got ourselves put back together the best we could and followed the tunnel to the basement.

  ***

  We found Abbey waiting at the inner door for us.

  “I was getting worried,” she said.

  “We’re fine, Abs. Just stocking up on water.”

  “Susan’s feeling better,” she said as she unfastened the hatch from the other side.

  “Ya?” asked Gus.

  “She’s started talking again. Said breakfast was good. Where’s your shirt?”

  “Oh I ripped it coming back in,” he lied.

  “C’mon, grab some grub while it’s still hot,” said a booming voice from near the small table. Mack.

  I wrapped my arms around myself, feeling chilled.

  “Where’s Susan?” I asked casually, noticing she wasn't in the common room.

  “She’s just lying down,” said Marnie as she walked in from the hallway and gently closed the door behind her. “So is Mimaw. She says the weather’s changing and she’s feeling her bones ache again.”

  “I’m worried about her,” said Mack as he shoved a chunk of fried meat into his mouth.”

  “She’ll be fine,” said Danny, his tone harsh.

  “Is she sick?” asked Gus.

  “She’s fine,” repeated Danny.

  The room suddenly felt tense. I walked to the wood stove, where Boggs was stirring the eggs. He smiled gently at me and I returned the smile half-heartedly. He was only half paying attention to the cooking eggs, focused mostly on the interaction between Danny, Mack, and Gus.

  “We think she might have lung cancer,” said Mack.

  “You don’t know that,” said his younger brother with obvious irritation.

  “I know I don’t, Danny. I know. But you know she’s gotten weak, and that cough of hers is just getting worse by the day.”

  “I’ll take a look at her after breakfast if you want?” offered Gus.

  “Are you a doctor?” asked Danny, his face instantly filled with hope.

  “No, son. I was a nurse in the Army, though.”

  “Will you? Look her over?” he asked enthusiastically.

  “As long as she’s ok with it, sure. I can’t promise miracles, though,” he warned the young man.

  I absently took a plate that Boggs held out for me. He had given me a scoop of scrambled eggs, potatoes, and a couple of strips of meat.

  “Thanks,” I whispered.

  Soon those of us who had yet to eat were sitting around the table together. The warmth of the food in my stomach was comforting. I took a bit of the meat, which I quickly realized was the same that had been in the beans the night before.

  “What is this?” I asked after swallowing.

  “Whale,” said Mack casually.

  “What?” I almost choked, for some reason finding it humorous.

  Danny laughed at me.

  “It’s a Makah staple. Gray whale. This was from last season’s hunt.”

  “Isn’t whaling illegal in the US?” asked Abbey.

  The meat was actually very much like fried SPAM and quite good. I took another bite.

  “Our tribe has a treaty with your government,” said Mack calmly. I assumed he was used t
o explaining this to people.

  “It’s actually pretty good,” I said once I had swallowed.

  “We appreciate your sharing with us,” said Boggs.

  Luckily, no one seemed offended by my little choking episode.

  “Marnie, come eat,” said Mack.

  “Be right there.”

  Abbey had curled up on the sofa with a book she had borrowed from Danny. It seemed they had a love of reading in common.

  The door to the hallway creaked open. Agnes appeared from behind it.

  “What smells good?” she asked quietly.

  “Eggs, potatoes, and a local delicacy,” said Gus with a big smile. “Come, sit.”

  He stood, offering his seat to her.

  “I’ll fix you a plate,” offered Danny.

  “Thanks,” said Agnes sleepily. “Not too much though. I’m not very hungry.”

  “How’s your hand feeling?” asked Gus.

  “A little better. Achy, but I can move my fingers now.”

  “That’s good,” he answered.

  I continued to eat while my food was still warm. Agnes sat beside me, and she seemed lethargic. I knew her heart was broken over the loss of her brother. No one spoke for a while. Abbey was lost in her book, Danny was stoking the fire, and the rest of us were eating. I wondered how long Susan might sleep. I was hoping to talk to her, to see how she was doing.

  “I should take some food in to Mimaw,” said Danny.

  “Let her sleep,” said Mack, his tone authoritative.

  “She needs to eat.”

  “Later, Danny,” said Marnie softly.

  “Hey. Where’s Nate?” I had only just noticed his absence.

  “With Susan,” said Abbey. “She wanted him to sit with her.”

  “So what’s the plan for the day?” asked Gus.

  “Marnie and I were going to head out. We need to make a salvage run soon. Find seeds and materials for the gardens. With the weather, though, we may wait.”

  “It looks like it’s trying to storm out,” said Boggs.

  My stomach was starting to feel sick, so I put my fork down and excused myself. “You guys mind if I go lay down?”

  “You ok?” asked Boggs. He and Gus both stood at the same time, obviously concerned about me.

  “You look a little pale, darlin’. Want me to come with you?”

  “No. I think I just ate too much. Just let me rest for half an hour?”

  Without waiting for a reply, and not wanting to puke in front of anyone, I headed toward the back rooms. I knew when I passed the first door on the left that Susan and Nathan were inside, sensing her briefly and vaguely. Mrs. Jones would be in the room on the right and I assumed the room I had shared with Gus the day prior would be available. The dim lamp at the end of the hall had been turned off. With no light to guide my way, I used my hand on the wall to search for the door jamb, and once I located it I opened it. I knew there would be a lantern on a table near the bed, so searched blindly for it. Eventually my fingers found the base of the light and I quickly switched it on. The room was instantly cast in a harsh white glow. It was the first time I had really seen the inside of the room, and it wasn't at all as I had imagined. The furniture was all mismatched and aged. The blankets on the bed were an assortment of bright colors. The walls were a bright blue with little green flowers trailing along near the ceiling. What had once been a small window unusually high on the wall was boarded over with oriented strand board and two by fours. The floor was covered in a dingy brown carpet that was worn in several places where foot traffic had been heaviest.

  My stomach began cramping so I sat on the bed and leaned forward, curling around my own legs. I took a few deep breaths, willing my stomach to calm down. My feet and hip were aching, but paled in comparison to the horrible abdominal pains. My head began swimming and under my breath I cursed the whale meat that I had just eaten. I could feel sweat beading on my forehead and the backs of my legs and it felt like my insides were shredding. I moaned loudly, unable to keep quiet any longer.

  “Zoe?”

  Someone’s hands were on my shoulders.

  “Hey, you ok?”

  “Is she alright?” It was Susan’s voice.

  Susan and Nate.

  “Get Gus. Now.” he said sternly.

  The pain in my stomach continued and I dug my fingernails into my thighs. It was worse than giving birth. I was unable to move and felt Nate sit beside me, holding me close. The pain was spreading to my chest, almost as if I were on fire inside. I tried to cry out but was unable to fill my lungs with the air that I desperately needed. My head filled with pressure that was deafening, causing the sounds around me to distort. I heard footfalls and while I kept my head in my lap with my eyes clenched shut, I knew Gus was kneeling in front of me. It felt as if the air in the room was being sucked out and some unknown force was crushing me.

  Talk to me, Zoe.

  The thoughts from Gus’ mind were annoyingly loud. I wanted to scream. Someone was making noise in the background, which I heard as garbled grunting and moaning. Without warning, the crushing grip of pain that had a hold of me let go. I inhaled sharply; the loudness of drawing my own breath in startled even me. I looked at Gus, our eyes meeting in instant understanding. My hands were in his, although I couldn’t recall how they got there.

  “Mack, Nathan, come with me,” said Gus as he stood suddenly.

  “What is it?” asked Marnie, her voice full of concern.

  I tried to stand, but the pain lingered like a terrifying nightmare. I knew by that point that it wasn't really there, and never had been. I had shared the misery with another as they experienced a horrible death. I could feel her now. I could feel her in my core; deep in my bones.

  “Stay here. The rest of you, just stay here.” Gus’ tone was short, his voice full of the authority that could shake someone if they didn’t know he meant well.

  I tried to step toward Gus, but Susan held me back.

  “Boggs? Where’s Boggs?” I asked, near hysteria. He, Abbey, and Agnes weren’t in the room with us.

  Danny stepped in front of me. “In the family room with Abbey. Mack, what’s going on?”

  “Mack, you packin’ a gun?” asked Gus quietly, ignoring the boy.

  It’s the old woman, I thought, hoping Gus would hear my thoughts. She’s turned.

  Mack didn’t answer. There was the briefest moment of eye contact between the two men, and Mack pulled a small pistol from the back waist of his pants.

  A horrific guttural moan came from outside the room. My skin shivered in response. The hunger that Danny’s Mimaw was experiencing in her newly risen state was different than what I had felt before. There was a sadness mingled in with the intensity of her need to feed on fresh flesh, as if she were fighting her new instincts.

  “Mack, what’s going on?” asked Danny again, his voice breaking. He sounded like a little boy all of a sudden.

  “Stay here,” grumbled Gus, addressing all of us but Mack.

  The moaning was turning to wailing, deep and pitiful. Something fell over causing a loud crash.

  “Mimaw!” cried out Danny. “We have to help her!”

  The boy ran forward toward the doorway.

  “No, boy,” said Gus as he grabbed his arm. “Mack, give me your gun? Keep the boy here?”

  “No, Gus!” I called out loudly. “Don’t go alone!”

  “I’ll be there with him,” said Nate.

  Mack nodded to Gus as he handed him the pistol. “It’s loaded. Do what you have to. Danny, stay here.”

  “No!” the teen yelled.

  Mack took hold of the boy’s arm and held him back while Gus and Nate rushed out of the room and into the hallway. I heard a door open, immediately followed by the sounds of Agnes screaming.

  “Holy fuck!” yelled Nathan.

  I broke free of Susan’s grip and slipped past the brothers who were in my way. Once I got to the hall, I could see Gus with the pistol raised in his hand. The air in
the hallway felt heavy and time seemed to slow. Agnes was at the far end of the hall, nearest to the door to the family room. Between her and Gus was Mrs. Jones. Even in the dim lighting that filtered from the room behind me, I could tell she was dead. Her eyes were sunken and unfocused, with no sign of humanity left behind. Her long hair fell limp behind her, several strands out of place and hanging down her face awkwardly. She wore pajamas that were threadbare. The front of her top was covered in blood that had poured from her mouth.

  “Agnes, get into the family room,” urged Gus.

  The old woman began walking toward her, but Agnes just stood there holding her hands over her mouth, seemingly paralyzed with fear.

  “Agnes! Now!” yelled Nate.

  The old woman rushed at her.

  “Shoot her!” I screamed.

  Agnes finally backed up toward the door, bumping into it loudly.

  “I can’t!” shouted Gus. “I could hit Agnes, or someone in the next room!”

  Agnes began screaming again as Mrs. Jones reached for her.

  “Goddamnit,” mumbled Gus.

  He rushed forward, to my dismay. The old woman’s hunger was growing rapidly, all shreds of her humanity now gone. There was no fight left within her, no sign of the sadness she had first clung to in her afterlife. She had tried to hold onto her human side. That much I knew.

  The old woman snarled as she shuffled forward. Another few steps would lead her to Agnes. Danny had broken free of his brother and was desperately working his way toward Gus. Nathan moved to hold him back.

  “Boggs!” I screamed. I wondered why he hadn’t come to help yet. “Boggs!”

  Gus reached Mrs. Jones at the same moment that she came into contact with Agnes. He struggled to pry the dead woman off of the living, and without thinking I ran forward to help him. As much as I wanted Agnes to live, it was Gus who I intended to help. It was his life that mattered the most to me, in that moment. Behind us, Danny wailed as Nate and Mack restrained him. Agnes sobbed and cried out in pain as Mrs. Jones tore at her flesh. I tried to pull Gus off of the old woman, fearing he’d be injured.

  Get off me, he warned.

  He reached back and shoved me, hard. I stumbled backward, landing on my butt. I knew he hadn’t meant to hurt me, but rather had tried to put distance between me and the old woman. I struggled to regain my footing, willing Gus to also back up. Agnes’ cries were fading and I could already feel her new life starting to buzz within my head. Blood poured from her throat, where a large gash had been torn. Blood continued to gurgle from the wound as her breath faded.