Goblin Slayer, Vol. 2

by Kumo Kagyu

  “O Earth Mother, abounding in mercy, by the power of the land grant safety to we who are weak…!”

  Not just the arrows, but even the drops of water miraculously stopped falling on them.

  The impassable barrier gave off a faint glimmer. At its center stood Priestess, clutching her staff with both hands. The prayer had cost some of her own spirit, but it had reached heaven, and the all-merciful goddess had granted the miracle of Protection.

  “I can’t hold it for lo—”

  “It’s enough.”

  Priestess was beginning to sweat, but Goblin Slayer reassured her briefly. The longsword was already in his right hand, and his shield was on his left. “How many?” he asked.

  “I can’t count them!” yelled back High Elf Archer as she nocked another arrow into her bow, and the bowstring sang as she loosed. “What are you going to do?”

  “What I always do,” Goblin Slayer said, unmoved by the hail of arrows. He spun the longsword in his hand into a reverse grip. “Kill all the goblins.”

  He held the sword above his head and then, almost too fast to see, he flung it.

  Since there was no intent to harm Priestess, the blade could pass through the Protection barrier, as per the rules.

  The sword cut through the incoming arrows and pierced the head of the goblin that appeared to be the chief. He didn’t even have time to cry out as he collapsed into the sewage, and the staff he had been holding hit the water with an impressive splash.

  “GROOARRB!!”

  “GAROOROROROR?!”

  The goblins began to howl at the loss of their shaman, and for a moment, the attack faltered.

  “That’s one. How many spells do you have left?”

  “Plenty. I’ve been saving them!” Dwarf Shaman answered as he put a gemstone in his sling and loosed it.

  “…Tunnel, then. Make us a hole.”

  His eyes widened at the frank instruction.

  “Don’t be silly now. You want to destroy that town up there?!”

  “Not up. Down.”

  Goblin Slayer reached into his bag.

  “Dig under the waterway and drain it,” he said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

  “But a city is like a finely wrought machine!” Dwarf Shaman shouted. “Upset even one thing, and the sewers might overflow!”

  “It’s not fire. It’s not water. It’s not poison gas.”

  His puzzlement would have been comical at any other time, but now High Elf Archer shouted at him, “Something else!”

  “…Hrm.”

  Goblin Slayer went quiet, then started to dig through his bag.

  The goblins, of course, were not standing idly by. They fired arrows as quickly as they could, their raft drawing ever nearer to shore.

  Priestess, her hands still on her staff, gave a cry.

  “I can’t hold it any longer…!”

  “You don’t have another one of those Gate scrolls, do you?” Dwarf Shaman said.

  “If I did, I would have brought it.”

  The tactic he had used against the ogre was still fresh in their minds, but a Gate scroll was a very valuable item and not easy to obtain. Part of what made Goblin Slayer unique was his willingness to use something so precious without a moment’s hesitation. After all, he had presumably intended to use it against goblins at some point.

  As he spoke, Goblin Slayer pulled something from his bag.

  “You have a strategy?” Lizard Priest inquired.

  “We attack the moment Protection wears off,” Goblin Slayer replied.

  “Of course.”

  “Goblins or raft? Which is best?”

  “Raft, I suppose.”

  “All right.”

  With that brief exchange, Goblin Slayer turned to Priestess.

  The girl was clinging to her staff with all her might; she could hardly spare the effort to look his way.

  Goblin Slayer glanced up for a moment. What to tell her?

  “…Cast Protection again. Solidify our defense.”

  “Y-yes, sir!”

  Priestess nodded firmly. Goblin Slayer let out a breath. His empty right hand worked open and closed.

  He needed a weapon. Maybe he could at least find a knife somewhere…

  “But a moment, milord Goblin Slayer.”

  Lizard Priest produced a beast’s fang from his pack and grasped it with a strange gesture.

  “O sickle wings of Velociraptor, rip and tear, fly and hunt…”

  A prayer to his venerable forebears. An appeal to his ancestors.

  His two scaled hands ran across the fang, imbuing it with the power of the fearsome naga. As he spoke, it grew and sharpened into a Swordclaw.

  “I believe this is the length of blade you prefer. Oh, but…try not to throw it. If you can.”

  “I’ll try.”

  Goblin Slayer took the proffered blade in a practiced hand. Not bad.

  “Only…a little…longer…!”

  The invisible barrier was beginning to groan under the ceaseless arrow fire.

  The groan turned to a crack, and then the shield shattered into dust.

  “Close your eyes and mouths, and don’t breathe. Here goes!”

  In the next instant, Goblin Slayer flung the egg in his left hand directly at the raft.

  “GARARAOB?!”

  “GRORRR?!”

  Screams.

  Ground-up pepper and snake bits mixed with shattered eggshell in the air. Goblins’ eyes ran. They choked on the mixture and flailed about with the pain.

  Slicing through the red haze, Goblin Slayer and Lizard Priest leaped aboard the ship. The raft swayed with their weight, sending one or two goblins into the muck.

  A loud splash and a spray. Droplets rained down.

  “Hrm.”

  Goblin Slayer grunted as he laid into the creatures struggling to maintain their footing on the rocking vessel. As he did, a goblin seized the moment to grab him from behind. With his shield, he gave it a resounding smack.

  Clang. “GAROU!”

  “…So you have armor, do you?” Goblin Slayer spat in annoyance. Without slowing, he spun, kicking the howling goblin clear off the raft.

  “GROOROB?!”

  The creature struggled mightily to climb back out of the sewage, but his armor was too heavy.

  Finally, the hideous face slipped beneath the surface. A few bubbles came up, and then the goblin, like a piece from a game board, was gone.

  “Hmm.”

  In a single motion, Goblin Slayer struck a nearby monster with the flat of his sword. The goblin and the grimy tears he had been crying went helplessly overboard.

  “GAROOARA?!”

  “It’s easiest just to push them off.”

  “O, fearsome naga! See your child’s deeds in battle!”

  Lizard Priest’s only response to Goblin Slayer was to bellow this prayer and leap at the goblins.

  As the goblins began to recover their sight, they tossed their bows aside and frantically drew their swords.

  But they were too slow.

  They fell to claw and fang and tail, to sword and shield, fist and foot. With nimble movements and long-studied tactics, the two warriors worked their way from one end of the raft to the other.

  Goblins were weak, after all.

  In a toe-to-toe battle with experienced adventurers, the average goblin didn’t have a glimmer of a chance. A couple of the creatures jumped into the sewage in their panic. Having forgotten they couldn’t swim, they promptly drowned.

  “Sixteen.”

  Even so, the goblins had not lost their chief advantage.

  “But we may be in difficult straits. They are many.”

  Which was to say, numbers.

  Where one was slain, two more appeared; where two drowned, four came forward. Four became eight. Eight became sixteen. Sixteen became thirty-two.

  How many goblins could fit on the little raft?

  “GOOORRB!”

  “GROB! GOOBR!!”r />
  The two adventurers met the mass of goblins and slew one after another. But there was no end to them.

  Though the adventurers were more than two themselves.

  “GRRB?!”

  A bud-tipped arrow flew through the air.

  Focused entirely on the threat in front of him, the goblin missed it until the shaft was buried in his eye and he was tumbling to the ground.

  “An elf doesn’t even need her eyes open to make her shot!”

  It was, of course, High Elf Archer, standing on shore.

  Her ears stood straight up, and she fired arrows faster than the eye could see. Quick—so quick that everything else seemed to pale.

  Among those who had words, there was none who could shoot better than an elf. Even in the furor of battle, her arrows hit only her targets. In a breath, she had emptied her quiver, but that didn’t mean she was out of arrows.

  With a distasteful cluck, High Elf Archer picked up some of the goblins’ bolts from earlier.

  “These things are so crude.”

  But crude or no—even if the arrowheads were made of stone—the elf would not miss.

  One goblin, growing impatient, picked up a bow again. He stooped down, using his friends as a shield (playing dirty, as goblins were wont to do), and readied himself to take a potshot from the shadows.

  Actually, for a goblin, his aim was fairly careful.

  “ORGGGG…”

  His target was that impertinent little elf.

  The rough bowstring made a squeaking sound as he drew it back.

  An elf. And a woman, at that. It would be fun to take her alive…but then, killing her would be pleasant, too.

  He’d shoot her in the eye. Or perhaps the ear? With a hideous smile, he let the arrow loose…

  “O Earth Mother, abounding in mercy, by the power of the land grant safety to we who are weak!”

  It never came close to High Elf Archer, but only bounced away with a clatter.

  The all-merciful Earth Mother could hardly refuse the supplication of her disciple, could she?

  In the next moment, the would-be goblin archer fell prey to one of High Elf Archer’s arrows and met his end.

  “Thanks.”

  “Not at all. I have to earn my keep, too…”

  High Elf Archer winked at the girl next to her. Priestess smiled stoutheartedly and held her prayer.

  “I can keep them off our back row,” Priestess said. “I’m counting on you to handle offense!”

  “Sounds like a plan! And I have just the thing here!”

  It was Dwarf Shaman who answered her, scavenging in the bag of catalysts he had so carefully conserved until that moment.

  He had a handful of clay in each hand.

  The edges of High Elf Archer’s lips turned up in a smile, but she never looked away from the goblins’ raft.

  “We know already, just get on with it! Dwarves take forever to do anything!”

  “Put a rock in it. You’ve your fighting style, and I’ve mine.”

  Dwarf Shaman began to roll each fistful of clay into a ball.

  He breathed on them, mumbling something, then gave a great bellow:

  “Beard-cutter, Scaly! Fall back!”

  At the same moment, he pitched the dirt balls through the air. His lips overflowed with words of power.

  “Come out, you gnomes, it’s time to work, now don’t you dare your duty shirk—a bit of dust may cause no shock, but a thousand make a lovely rock!”

  As they watched, the little balls transformed into massive boulders and smashed into the boat.

  Stone Blast enhanced with an influx of spiritual power to be even more impressive than usual.

  “M-milord Goblin Slayer!”

  “Right.”

  The two adventurers on the raft exchanged a quick glance, then shoved through the fleeing goblins, making a huge leap to shore.

  Behind them, there was a roar, and sewage surged up like a geyser. Droplets of the filthy stuff rained down on Goblin Slayer and Lizard Priest as they rolled onto solid ground.

  The raft sank to the bottom of the sewer, goblins and all. A few monsters had escaped by the skin of their teeth, but their armor dragged them down and they disappeared.

  No one spoke as they watched all this happen.

  The rain had never abated; it felt cold as they stood still, flushed with the heat of combat. Their breath fogged; the stench of blood and sewage rose around them.

  High Elf Archer asked in a somewhat strained voice:

  “So, what do we do next?”

  “…Give me a break,” Dwarf Shaman said morosely. He pulled out his jar of wine and undid the stopper. “That little trick just now really took it out of me.”

  Next to him, Priestess slid weakly to her knees.

  “Let’s…rest, for a moment. I need it, too…”

  “No.” Goblin Slayer shook his head.

  Despite having just come through a pitched battle, he didn’t seem to be breathing hard; he was staring squarely at the water.

  “We have to move immediately.”

  “Hwa…?”

  Priestess looked up at him vacantly.

  He looked around vigilantly, still holding weapons in both hands.

  “I concur.” Lizard Priest nodded, making his strange hands-together gesture. “That battle was not a quiet one. Even with the rain to dampen the noise…”

  Something else may have noticed us.

  Just as he said this…

  There was another splash.

  High Elf Archer looked at the water with a grim expression.

  “Escaped the goblins only to be caught by the wolves, have we?” She shuddered as she invoked the old proverb.

  The surface of the sewage quaked; waves grew up and began rippling closer.

  The next instant, huge jaws exploded out of the murky water.

  “AAAAAARRRIGGGGGG!!!!”

  The instant after that, the adventurers decided on a tactical retreat.

  They ran for their lives through the rain, scattering droplets everywhere. They made their way without hesitating, despite the dimness of the sewers. This was only because they were led by High Elf Archer and Lizard Priest, whose agility helped them maneuver through the darkness and around minor obstacles. Priestess and Dwarf Shaman simply followed in their wake.

  The willowy priestess and the stout dwarf were not naturally quick runners. Goblin Slayer, the lantern still hanging from his belt, protected them as they ran as fast as their feet would carry them.

  Behind him, the surface of the water thrashed again.

  He chanced a glance back. Massive white jaws filled his vision: long and narrow, vast, and brimming with sharp teeth. The mouth that loomed out of the darkness was more than enough to bite a person in half.

  The jaws closed around empty air and sank back into the water, but they were gradually gaining ground.

  “I’ve determined one thing from my observations,” Goblin Slayer said, his breathing even. “That is not a goblin.”

  “I could’ve told you that!” shouted High Elf Archer, who had not looked back to see the beast for herself.

  There are monsters called alligators, also known as “swamp dragons.”

  Dragon is just a name; they are more closely related to lizards. They are not the creatures of legend.

  They are, however, hideous: their bodies and jaws long and flat, forcing them to crawl about. Still, an alligator slicing through the water with its long tail is no laughing matter.

  In this place, the white alligator hurtling toward them was more to be feared than any mythical beast.

  “Hey, Scaly! Ain’t that your cousin? Do something about him!”

  Dwarf Shaman was working his stubby legs as hard as he could. Spittle flew from his mouth as he shouted.

  “Most unfortunately, when I entered the clergy I had to abandon all ties to my family.”

  “What, don’t you ever even go home?”

  “It is quite far.”

>   With a harsh breath, Lizard Priest took Dwarf Shaman’s feet out from under him with a sweep of his tail.

  “Whoooa?!” Dwarf Shaman exclaimed as his legs left the ground and floated through the air.

  At about the moment he expected to be back on the ground, he found a great, scaly arm wrapped around him, holding him. Lizard Priest didn’t slow for an instant as he grabbed up Dwarf Shaman and kept running.

  Those unique lizardman eyes darted about.

  “And to be clear, spell caster, that wyrm is no relation of mine!”

  “Oh-ho! I like this! Nice and easy!”

  Apparently unperturbed by his friend’s remark, Dwarf Shaman rode on Lizard Priest’s shoulder, laughing all the while.

  “Wh-where do you think it c-came from?” Priestess asked from behind them, gasping for breath.

  Praying to the gods puts a terrible strain on the soul and spirit. It is no easier than physical combat. Hence she was nearly out of breath, her feet unsteady; she felt she might fall at any moment.

  Goblin Slayer gave a click of his tongue and picked her up by her narrow waist.

  “Wha—?!”

  “Get your breathing back under control.”

  Priestess yelped, startled, but after Goblin Slayer’s short response, she found herself caught up under his arm.

  She kicked and squirmed from embarrassment, both at their physical proximity and at being a literal burden to him.

  “I—I’m all right! Y-you don’t have to carry me…”

  “Stop struggling. I’ll drop you.”

  “Ohh…”

  “You have one more miracle left, correct?”

  It would be trouble if she collapsed here and now, his words informed her.

  “I may need you to use another spell.”

  After a moment Priestess’s cheeks flushed, and she replied quietly, “Right.”

  “I think we would be well-advised to get off the waterway,” Lizard Priest said. Holding Dwarf Shaman on his shoulder with one hand, he reached easily into his bag with the other and pulled out the map.

  He kept running, reading the map even as raindrops began to streak across it.

  The damp and the rain, even the sticky air, were the friends of Lizard Priest, who had grown up deep in the jungle.

  “Let’s give him the dwarf! We can get away while that monster’s having dinner!” High Elf Archer, leaping through the rain like a deer, said in apparent sincerity. “I’m sure it’ll get food poisoning!”