by T. W. Brown
What did that make me? I wondered.
“We all sat here in the house waiting for something, and when we started hearing explosions come one after the other to the point where it felt like it might never stop…and then it did and that was even worse,” she said, her mouth so close to my skin that I felt the warmth of her breath pulse with each word.
Katrina propped herself up on one elbow and turned my head so that I was facing her. “I don’t ever want you to go out like that again unless I am with you. I had no idea what was happening and that was the worst feeling in the world.”
I did not want to argue with her, but in my head, a voice was saying that she had no idea what the worst feeling in the world felt like. If she knew what I knew…saw what I’d seen…
“I don’t plan on ever going out like that again,” I whispered, and pulled her close to me.
We lay there like that for a good, long while. Eventually, we got up, dressed, and made our way downstairs.
“Nice of you two to finally come down.” Dr. Zahn’s voice made us both jump, and I was reaching for a weapon I wasn’t carrying out of habit.
“Seriously, Doc,” I snapped as I stomped down the stairs and into the living room where the doc was sitting. My mouth shut the moment that I realized she was not alone.
“Good afternoon, Billy,” Carol Wills said as she sipped from the cup in her hands.
I glanced at Dr. Zahn who kept her face as emotionless as ever. I had no idea how she did it, but I was going to seriously have to ask her for lessons someday.
“Hi, Carol,” I finally answered in greeting, hoping that I was able to keep the emotion out of my voice. In my head, I was trying to figure out any reason that the woman might be here that did not have to do with our decision to leave tonight. I was coming up empty. “Can I help you?”
“Yes,” the woman sat her cup down on the table and leaned forward with her face as stone-cold and serious as I’d ever seen it, “you can take me and my daughter with you when you leave.”
“Your daugh—” My teeth clicked shut. If this was a trick or a test, I’d already failed. The first thing out of my mouth should have been a denial that I had plans of leaving.
A woman stepped in from the archway that led to the dining room. Her name did not jump immediately to mind, but those exotic eyes were something that I could never forget.
“Y-y-you,” I stammered, my gaze going from Carol to the woman standing with her arms folded across her chest and a hint of a smile curving her lips.
“Laura Wills,” the woman said as she stepped forward and extended a hand. I shook it as I recalled that first time we’d met when I woke in the makeshift cell in the basement of a house here in La Grande. “I said it would be nice if we met again under better circumstances.”
The sounds of somebody clearing their throat behind me made me flush and stumble backwards. I reached out and grabbed Katrina by the hand, tugging her forward like a shield or buffer between me and the hypnotically pretty Laura Wills.
“We want to come with you,” Carol repeated, and I spun to face her.
“How do you know that we are leaving?” I asked defensively. I seriously doubted that we had been bugged. Didn’t you need electricity for that? So how, unless somebody told her, did Carol know with such certainty that we were leaving?
“I invited her,” Dr. Zahn said, not waiting for the other woman to speak…or tattle.
I think I sprained my neck and my jaw at the same time. Oh…and my eyes, because it felt like they almost popped right out of my head.
“There was a bit of an argument at that silly little meeting,” Dr. Zahn said. “Apparently the news of Darla and the others’ departure has reached the all-hearing ears of Graham. He wanted to send out a team to track them down and either bring them back or kill them.”
“Tish left an hour ago with a dozen heavily armed individuals,” Carol picked up the narration. “I spoke out against it, asking when this had become our policy. Graham said that we were in a tenuous situation and could not risk anybody leaving at this time who might tell others about us or relay our weaknesses. He said that the fact that most of those who had left with Darla were friends or family of those who died in the raid, that they would have a possible idea of seeking revenge. Personally, I think he likes the idea of flexing what he perceives as his power and authority.”
“After the meeting,” now it was Dr. Zahn picking up the narrative, “several of the people on that committee sort of met informally. It sounds to me like there is going to be a freaking civil war in this place. I don’t know how fast it will come, or if it was all talk and bluster, but I think it is best that we not delay our departure.
“As I was heading home, Carol and her daughter caught up with me and asked if I might consider getting the hell out of here. I actually let them make the proposal to me. Once I was convinced that they were serious about what they were saying and that this was not some fishing expedition, I asked them to accompany me home.” Dr. Zahn arched an eyebrow that seemed to almost dare me to question her decision.
“I do believe that Graham might be a bit power hungry, and it has only been made worse ever since he made Tish his personal security officer,” Carol snarked.
“See,” I touched one finger to my nose and pointed the other at Carol like she’d just guessed the correct answer, “that is a huge part of the problem. If the person you have leading you has the need, or even thinks he or she has the need for personal security…then you got the wrong person leading.”
“So can we join you or not?” Laura Wills asked.
“I don’t have any reason to say no,” I said with a shrug. “But you are gonna have to be okay with leaving your stuff behind.” Carol nodded, but Laura looked like she was about to voice a protest. I raised a hand to cut her off as I explained. “If you go home and pack, then come trudging all the way back here with your prize possessions, you will raise every flag possible. This trip will be over before it starts.”
“He’s right,” Carol agreed, placing a comforting hand on her daughter’s arm.
“But my pictures…my…” her voice trailed off to sobs.
“I guess we have been part of the fortunate few,” Carol apologized as her daughter folded into her arms and wept. “This is home, and while we lost friends and loved ones, we have been in our own house throughout the entire ordeal.”
I gave a nod. I wondered what my house might look like now? Had it been looted, burned to the ground, used as a hideout for survivors on the run? Another thought popped in…had it been flattened by a massive herd of zombies like the one I’d seen the other day?
The day almost seemed to come to a complete halt as we waited for others in our group to return from whatever job or activity they were responsible for. I was surprised that all of Grady’s people had already been roped into one task or the other. I guess the days of letting a person get settled were not applicable any more. That made me wonder how we could so easily ditch some of the old ways, yet hold on to others with such fierce determination.
The big moment came when Melissa and the children returned from school. I can only speak for myself, but I felt very strongly that if we were going to be exposed, that would be our most likely chance.
“She was a little bit mopey,” Melissa reported, “but she kept her mouth shut.”
Once she and the kids went upstairs to pack what they would be carrying, I sat down to pour over a map. It was pretty worn out, but it was better than nothing. I had one stop to make on the way, and it was already gnawing at my gut.
“Is there a problem, William?” Dr. Zahn took a seat across from me.
“When we went out and rescued Gable’s mom, the camp had a hefty amount of supplies. I left Andy and Jerome there to keep it under guard. But they each had a person from here with them,” I explained. “I want the stuff from that camp…or at least as much as we can move. But when we show up to take it, we will most likely have to do something about those two other
men.” I slumped back in my chair and squeezed my eyes shut. At least the headache that was starting to build would take my mind off my ribs.
“Let’s deal with things as they come,” Dr. Zahn said with a softness that made my eyes open in surprise. “You have a lot of baggage you seem to think you need to carry all by yourself. Perhaps you should let a few of us shoulder one or two of these things.”
I smiled. It felt weak and forced, but it was actually very honest and sincere. In a strange way, it made me even more certain that I was doing the right thing. We didn’t belong here. Maybe La Grande would become a beacon city that helped reshape a new world…or maybe it would be overwhelmed by the cancer already growing within the false security of a few tall fences.
“Thanks, Doc,” I said.
***
“It’s time,” I said with a loud whisper.
I noticed a few people start at the sudden sound. We’d been gathered in the living room for the last hour or so, and everybody was getting antsy. I was actually quite proud of Thalia, Rabia, and Levent. Through it all, they had been like church mice. As for the baby, Melissa had taken care of that in a way that would have gotten her thrown in jail back in the old days.
We had a fairly decent stock of medical and first aid supplies. Some of the stuff I would have never thought of, but you never left behind any sort of medication, be it cream, liquid, or pill. Somewhere along the way, we’d come up with a few bottles of liquid Children’s Tylenol. A dropper of that for the baby had knocked the kid out cold.
I stepped out onto the porch and pulled up the zipper on my hoody. There was a decent chill to the air. The sky was once again crystal clear, but a sliver of moon was out to cast a pale glow. Not enough to be a worry, and just enough to have at least some visibility to lessen the chance of stumbling. Of course that was all gone as soon as we reached the woods. That was another thing that a person had to get used to. If you travelled at night, the open spaces were okay if you had a moonlit sky; but as soon as you were under the canopy of a forest, it was a whole different story. And since we had only minimal light sources in the form of a few dozen homemade glow-sticks, we would stick to the open areas as much as possible.
My plan was to bring James Sagar, Chet Bozer, Rachel Mint, Paula Yin, Katrina, Carol, and BP when we broke away from La Grande. Dr. Zahn and Grady would lead the rest of the group up along the mountain road and make their way to the old forestry center cabin and campground that had been our home what seemed like a lifetime ago. My group would go after Andy and Jerome. I had made it clear what we would probably have to do, and then given each of them the choice of whether or not they accompanied me. Nobody had backed down from the potentially unsavory task.
We had no problems as we approached the tower that was closest to our house. I think a part of me was going to actually miss that metal spire. We’d certainly had more than a few events centered around it.
I gave the signal for the group to halt. This part was to be all mine. I would take it as just one more ugly scar on my damned soul.
Creeping along in the shadows, I reached the base and began the climb. I knew what needed to be done, and I’d certainly done worse in the recent past, but that did not mean that I would enjoy or take lightly what I was about to do.
Each rung of the ladder seemed to almost burn my hand. I heard whoever was on watch up in the tower actually humming. This person had no idea that death was on the other side of the lip of the enclosed stand where they were probably just gazing out across the quite countryside, lost in thoughts. I shoved aside my brain’s attempt at humanizing this person.
Peering over the top of the rail, I saw the dark shadow of whoever it was that had the misfortune of drawing the watch detail for this particular tower on this particular night. The person was sitting with their back to me, tapping his (I could tell it was a guy) fingers on the rail and humming a song that I could not initially identify. Just as I brought my knife up and had lined it up to plunge into the side of this poor guy’s neck, I recognized the tune. Friends in Low Places by Garth Brooks.
I felt my hand begin to tremble, and in a sudden change of heart, I flipped my wrist. The pommel came down hard on the man’s temple. He yelped and slumped to the floor. I scurried over and opened the pouch at my hip. Funny…the stuff we carry around these days. I produced a hard plastic zip strip and rolled the man over so I could bind his wrists.
“Damn,” I breathed. It was Doubting Thomas.
The human mind is an amazing thing. In the span of a few heartbeats, my mind had already laid out the likely outcome for this man. He already had a terrible reputation here in La Grande. When our departure was discovered, and it was revealed that we slipped through at his tower, he was as good as done. I wouldn’t put it past this place to execute the poor guy.
Okay, so maybe my imagination was a shade on the overactive, if not dreary, side of things, but I still saw no result that did not end poorly for this man. Unscrewing the top of my canteen, I splashed his face with water. It took a few slaps as well, but eventually the man was sitting up, rubbing his temple.
“What the…” he grumbled, and then everything seemed to hit him at once as he tried to scramble back while reaching for his weapon. Thankfully I had relieved him of it before rousing him.
“You told me that you have my back,” I said as he stared at me in absolute confusion. “So I am going to give you a choice. My people and I are leaving. You can stay here, or you can come with us.”
I thought he would need a second or two to think it over. I was wrong.
“Let’s go.” He climbed to his feet, still rubbing the side of his head. “Man, I owe you one for this,” he said with a wince.
“Yeah…sorry about that. The good news is that I changed my mind at the last second. I was gonna actually kill you.”
I did not miss the sour look as the man climbed down over the side of the tower. Turning back to where the others would be waiting, I produced my glow stick and waved it twice before tucking it back into my pouch.
BP was the first one up and paused when he did not see a corpse. I filled him in and told him to expect Thomas waiting when he climbed down. It took a bit longer than I would have liked, but eventually everybody was on the other side.
We had to sort of loop around to get clear of the fringes of La Grande and then start across open farmland. The roads were really suffering from a hard winter and no public department of transportation to come along and fix things. I seriously doubted if many of the more rural roads would even be in existence five years from now. Hell, I wondered if the highway would still be intact. I knew of a few places already that had suffered from mudslides.
We reached the spot where it was time to separate. My team sort of clustered around me, and all the goodbyes were said. I felt confident that the doc could lead the group back home.
The nine of us—Thomas had begged to be a part of the team—headed east and into the foothills. The problem with travelling in the darkness like this, besides the whole not being able to see, was that everything and nothing looked familiar. That is why I never saw the trip wire and landed on my face. I rolled over to find myself looking up the barrel of Andy’s M4. I may have peed just a little.
“What the hell are you doing creeping around in the dark?” the big man asked in a quiet whisper as he reached down and hauled me to my feet.
The rest of my team had frozen in place in the few seconds all of that took to transpire. I am pretty sure that I heard James Sager chuckle. Brushing myself off, I winced as the man from La Grande who had been paired with Andy emerged from the shadows of some nearby trees.
“We need to talk,” I leaned forward and whispered in Andy’s ear.
“Carlos,” Andy called over his shoulder, I assumed he was talking to the man standing with his rifle slung casually over his shoulder, “keep the watch. I gotta chat with my man Billy for a minute.”
My stomach churned and the acid stung the back of my throat. This had been b
ad enough, but now I knew the guy’s name that I was more than likely going to have to kill.
I motioned for the rest of my team to hang back while Andy and I strolled into one of the two remaining long, empty tents. I was a little surprised to find that damn near everything had been packed and apparently stowed for transport.
“I see you managed to keep busy,” I waved my hand at the seemingly cavernous and empty space.
“Didn’t see the need to waste time and wait for y’all to show up and tell us to tear everything down,” Andy replied matter-of-factly.
“So…” I felt my mouth go dry like somebody had just poured a bag of hot sand in it.
“Aww fuck!” Andy snarled.
The sudden burst of angry profanity made me jump. I cocked my head at the large man sitting across from me.
“I ain’t killin’ Carlos, so you can just shut that line of thought down right now!” the Ranger exclaimed.
“¿Que?” I heard a voice yelp from outside.
“Wait…how…” I was stammering as Andy stood up.
“We heard all that shit going down from up here. Sounded like a freakin’ war,” Andy spat with a shake of his head. “Now you and a few others show up and you’re looking like somebody shoved a fresh turd in your mouth. You ain’t the murderin’ type, kid. So before you say a single word that is going to make me hate you…and probably have to kill you…maybe you should think long and hard about what you want to say.”
Just then, the tent flap opened and the man I’d seen outside just a moment ago entered with his hands in the air. Thomas and Katrina were with him, guns not actually pointed at the man, but held in a casually dangerous way across their bodies. Then the rest of the team came in. There was a wide mixture of expressions; everything from confusion to apathy.
“Everybody just hold on!” I snapped. “Weapons down.” I’d made it past one potential killing without having to shed any blood, maybe there was a way out of this particular situation.
