Surviving the Fall (Hidden Truths Book 4)

by Brittney Sahin

  “What are you suggesting?” she asked, raising a brow.

  He lowered his head, fighting the urge to be sucked into the vortex of her beauty.

  “You think I met you on purpose?” She laughed. “Funny. My boss thought maybe you had tried to do that to me.”

  “Yeah, well,” he said, looking back at her from the corner of his eye, “it is kind of unbelievable. But then again, nothing about the last week of my life screams normal.” He gripped the bridge of his nose, trying to work through the intense emotions that were becoming more prominent than the blistering aftereffects of the explosion.

  “Leave, Alexa. If you’re not going to be straight with me, then leave.”

  “I—”

  “When you’re ready to tell me the truth I’ll be all ears, but until then, do me a favor and stop pretending to give a damn about me. Get what you need from me and cross back over the ocean and go home.” He left his bedroom, in desperate need of that beer. Hell, maybe he’d even go back to the bathroom and grab the oxy from the trash bin.

  “Jake.”

  He opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle. “Go.” He remained facing the open fridge, the bottle in hand, the refrigerator door blocking her from his sight. He couldn’t face her. The last thing he needed were these awful mind games. He had enough shit to sort through in his head without someone muddying it up.

  “I’m sorry. I should have told you this morning, but I—”

  “Because you care about saving the world? Which is great.” A bite of sarcasm flavored his voice as he faced her. “But to hell with the consequences, right?”

  He heard her sigh but made no attempt to look her way. His shoulders relaxed a little at the sound of her moving behind him.

  Once she was gone, Jake slammed the refrigerator door shut and smacked the freezer door with a balled fist.

  He needed out of this black hole. Sooner rather than later.

  Chapter Twelve

  “Why are you at this shitty gym?”

  Alexa slowed the speed on the treadmill and switched from running to walking. She swiped at the sweat on her brow and grabbed her water bottle out of the holder to swallow several mouthfuls of the cool liquid.

  “I take it your meeting with Jake didn’t go so well?” Xander crossed his arms and stood off to the side of the treadmill, studying her.

  “Oh, yeah. It went great.” The sarcasm was baked into her voice as hot as black cement on a summer day. “He actually remembered something.” She screwed on the cap of the water bottle and slipped it into the holder before staring down at the rotating fabric beneath her feet.

  “Well? Is it something important?”

  She faked a laugh as she looked back over at Xander. “Depends. You think I’m important?” She jabbed at the stop button.

  “He remembered you? You serious?”

  “Well, he remembered that he knows me, at least.” She stepped off the treadmill and grabbed one of the complimentary hand towels by the cooler. As she draped the towel around her neck, she studied her image in the full-length wall mirror. They were alone in the small hotel gym.

  “So how’d you handle it?”

  She swiped the towel over her face, and then their eyes met in the mirror. “Like an arse.”

  “I should have gone with you.” He came up next to her and placed a hand on her shoulder, his gray eyes still holding hers. His brows quirked up as his lips twitched. “You still have feelings for this bloke?”

  “Ugh.” She tipped her head forward, pressing a hand to her face. “No,” she grumbled, not sure if she was lying to him or herself—maybe both. Because there had been something between them tonight—something that went beyond words. She wasn’t quite sure if she could describe the moment when she saw Jake bent over in pain in his office when she had first seen the scars on his back.

  And when they had kissed, for one tiny fraction of a minute she felt like Alexa Ryan, the woman. Not the agent. Not the person who had to lie to every man she met.

  No, she felt like someone who could have more, even if it was for only a moment.

  Her fingertips bit into her palms as she tried to reel in her emotions, not ready to share them with her best mate and partner. “Xander?”

  “Yeah?”

  She wet her lips and sucked in a breath. “You ever get lonely?” She swallowed as her eyes found his again. There was a warmth there, despite their steely color.

  He dropped his hand from her shoulder and swiped it over his hard, square jaw before bringing it up to the nape of his neck. There was a flicker of seriousness there, but it passed as quickly as it had come. “Of course not, love. I have you. I have the agency. And I have a woman in every city I travel to.” He lifted his shoulders in an innocent manner.

  “Even here? In Montana?” She almost laughed.

  “Maybe not here.” He winked at her and patted her on the back. “Come on. Get yourself some rest. We have a long day tomorrow.”

  “Yeah. Okay.”

  She said goodbye to him outside her hotel room and then went into the bathroom for a shower.

  Once undressed, she stared at herself in the mirror as her finger traced the scar by her hipbone.

  She shut her eyes and skirted her hand up her breastbone and to her lips, resting them there as she remembered Jake’s kiss.

  I’m in so much bloody trouble.

  “Just got off the phone with Matt. Sam hasn’t found anything new from Reza. And GCHQ says they haven’t found anything of use on the drive yet—”

  “Wow. You’re full of good news.” Alexa focused on the snowflakes drifting outside the window as she and Xander sat parked in Jake’s driveway. They were waiting for Special Agent Trent Shaw to show up for their web conference. Xander unbuckled his seat belt and turned on the radio. Soft country tunes drifted into the air for just a moment before Xander jabbed at the buttons, trying to switch the music.

  “They’ll find something eventually,” Xander said. “We need to be optimistic.”

  “Any news from Tenley and John? They were supposed to meet with Berat today in Istanbul, right?” It was Tuesday, their normal day of contact.

  “Not yet.”

  Just then, she noticed taillights reflecting off the dark wood of the cabin. Alexa peeked at the side mirror and spotted a SUV pulling in behind them. “They’re here.”

  “You ready for this?”

  “As ready as I’ll ever be.” She fought back the urge to check her appearance in the dashboard mirror, knowing that Xander would give her hell for it. “Let’s do this.”

  Xander came around next to her once they were out of the car, holding on to her forearm as if to protect her from slipping on the snowy driveway. “Don’t want you busting your arse,” he said as a smile met his lips. But the smile soon faded once the two men in suits stepped out of the SUV.

  The men posted to guard Jake, who were sitting in the car parked in front of Xander and Alexa’s rental, remained in their vehicle. They must not have had the clearance to be a part of the web call.

  “You must be Agent Ryan,” Agent Shaw mumbled as if the words were an inconvenience to his mouth. “And good to see you again,” he added when looking Xander’s way.

  Alexa recognized Shaw from the hospital. “Thank you for meeting with us,” she said when she realized Xander wasn’t going to speak.

  “Not like we had much of a choice,” Shaw said dryly, and then tipped his head at the tall man to his right. “This is Special Agent Harris. He’s from the D.C. field office.”

  “Ma’am,” Agent Harris said and nodded.

  “We can drop the formalities, right? Call me, Alexa, please.” She smiled, hoping to bridge some sort of alliance with the closed mouth Feds—she needed them to open up to her agency finally.

  “Works for me, Alexa. I’m Randall.” He smiled at her and gave her a slight wink, and she was relieved he seemed to have a little more of a personality than Shaw.

  “Call me Trent, then,” he grumbled.


  After a moment, she flicked Xander’s hand from her forearm, embarrassed by her partner’s protectiveness over her. They were the same age, so why he treated her like a kid sister was beyond her.

  “Let’s get this over with so we can get back to London,” Xander said, mimicking Trent’s grumpiness.

  They followed after the agents and Alexa swallowed and shut her eyes for a brief moment when Trent’s fist tapped at the door. She wasn’t ready to see Jake again. To face the anger in his eyes.

  Her eyes flashed open when she heard the click of the door latch. Alexa’s eyes landed on Jake as he stood there in the doorframe, his broad shoulders hidden beneath a dark brown, button-down shirt that made the color of his eyes appear even darker.

  He looked straight at her. Practically through her.

  Xander rested his hand on her back, offering her support, sensing her nerves.

  Jake’s eyes shifted down in one quick movement, taking note of Xander’s arm behind Alexa’s back, and then his jaw clenched.

  Shit. Did he think . . .? Not that it mattered what he thought. She and Jake weren’t together, after all. Hell, they’d never technically been a couple. And besides, she was here to work a case, not get her head and heart twisted up in some insane mess.

  “How are you?” Trent asked Jake.

  “Just great.” His voice was icy, and she missed the sweetness and humor she’d heard from him before. He stepped back and waved his hand, motioning them in and out of the cold.

  Alexa shrugged off her winter coat and unwrapped the scarf from her neck. She took her cue from the others, resting her things over the top of the couch in the living room. Her gaze flickered to the hall to where his bedroom was. Where they had kissed.

  When she looked up, Jake was watching her from across the room, his arms crossed as he stood in front of the lit fireplace. The flames roared, and the heat from the fire radiated throughout the room, warming her. Or maybe it was Jake who was making her hot.

  “Where should we set up the computer?” Trent asked, clutching a laptop bag.

  “Kitchen is fine,” Jake answered.

  Trent and Randall went into the kitchen, but Xander remained at Alexa’s side. Jake also hadn’t moved.

  “Jake, you remember my partner, Xander, right? He met you at the base before you came back stateside.”

  Xander approached Jake and held out his hand. “Good to see you again, mate.”

  Alexa took a few steps closer as the two alpha males stared each other down. Both were tall and muscular, strength rippling through every inch of their bodies. But Xander was like family to her, and Jake—well, he was something entirely different.

  Jake didn’t say anything, but he finally shook Xander’s hand.

  “Shall we?” Xander tipped his head to the kitchen.

  “Could you give us a minute?” Alexa asked Xander.

  “Sure.” Xander nodded at Jake and moved into the kitchen to join the agents.

  “How are you?” she softly asked while stepping up in front of him.

  Jake placed a hand on the mantel above the fireplace and looked down at the dancing orange and red flames. “You mean after what happened last night?”

  “Um. Yeah.”

  When he looked back at her, she could see irritation burning in his irises. “How do you think I am?” Jake lowered his hand and moved past her, his shoulder brushing against her as he left her alone in front of the fire.

  She released a deep breath and went into the kitchen. Randall and Trent had set up a laptop on the kitchen table, and they were pulling up a secure network.

  “Looks like they’re online. They’re ready,” Randall said. A few seconds later, Laney appeared on screen alongside two men Alexa didn’t recognize. She had to assume they were members of Parliament.

  Laney didn’t introduce herself or the men she was sitting next to at the table. And Randall and Trent didn’t say their names, either. Alexa assumed they already knew each other. They’d probably been going back and forth for days.

  “We’re waiting for the information, Special Agent Shaw,” Laney said, clasping her hands on the desk in front of her, appearing confident as always. “We’ve already been working with NSA on a case, and that case appears to have crossed into FBI territory. So, now we’ll be needing to work with your officers as well.”

  Maybe they hadn’t chatted as much as Alexa had thought—wouldn’t they have known this already? What in the hell were the Americans hiding?

  “What does NSA have to do with this? I wasn’t informed that they were involved.” Trent looked over at Randall, his brows pinching together.

  “Maybe if you had bothered to take at least half of our dozen calls—you’d know this.” Laney shook her head, clearly irritated with the Feds. “Speak first, and we’ll explain next.” She leaned back in her leather chair.

  Jake folded his arms and stood off to the side, out of the view of the webcam. He stared out the window over the kitchen sink as if he had nothing to do with the current conversation.

  “I’m not prepared to talk about classified information just yet,” Trent answered.

  Of course, not. This is a waste of time.

  Laney chuckled, and it wasn’t her polite laugh. No, it was her “I’m going to kill you” laugh. “Then what the bloody hell are we doing having this conversation right now—and why did you leave London in the first place? Are you planning on taking a plane back here then? The agents you left in London for investigative purposes aren’t ranked high enough to give us a damn thing.”

  Clearly the Americans had done that on purpose.

  “What do you want to tell us, Special Agent Shaw? Because I’m losing patience and running out of time. We have sources that have verified an impending attack on British soil, and this attack is from the group that we believe was holding your agent.”

  “And you were working with the NSA about this before Agent Summers’ abduction?” Randall asked.

  “Yes. We’re tracking a cyber terrorist group known as Anarchy. Well, they use the computer ‘at’ symbol before their name. ‘At Anarchy.’ Are you familiar with them?” Laney asked.

  “Heard of them, but cyber is not our territory,” Randall answered.

  Alexa’s lips parted. “That doesn’t make sense.” Alexa looked up at Trent, confused. “I assumed you were after Anarchy, which is why they took your agent.”

  “We have nothing to do with hackers or cyber terrorists.” Trent rubbed a hand down his jaw and glanced over at Jake. “Why do you think our mission prior to the explosion is connected to yours? What is it that you’re not telling us?”

  Alexa was about to speak, to yell at him again for being such a roadblock to their investigation in the last week, but Laney held up her hand. “We decrypted intel after the explosion from a hacker connected to Anarchy that led us to believe your American was taken by their group.” Laney looked over at the men at the table and then stood up, pressing her hands to the desk and leaning forward a little until she seemed to fill the computer screen. “So, Special Agents Shaw and Harris, are you ready to share your information? Could you please enlighten us on what your agent was doing in the U.K. prior to the explosion, so we can figure out how our cases are connected?”

  Jake’s attention was now glued to the back of the computer, the muscles in his jaw tight, his chest lifting in deeper breaths. It had to be hard for him to listen to all of this, to know he might be able to help if only his memories hadn’t betrayed him.

  “We’re not at liberty to go into depth, but what I can say is that we were a part of a joint task force in Sicily. It included CIA and the military, as well as Jake and one other FBI agent. Jake was chosen for the assignment because of his unique knowledge of the HVT.” HVT—high-value target. “We’ve been tracking Qasim Ansari, one of the military commanders of ISIS, for two years now, and Jake’s been the lead agent in charge of counterterrorist activity related to Ansari on American soil. We received credible intel that Ansari would b
e in Libya, and so we set up at our base in Sicily to take them out. Unfortunately, our mission was compromised, and our men were attacked off base.”

  Jake’s brows furrowed, his eyes darting to Trent. Alexa wondered if this was the first time Jake had learned of the nature of his mission. Although Qasim Ansari wasn’t a man that Alexa had personally been after, she’d heard of him. He was one of the most wanted men in the world by all agencies.

  “And what happened to the other agents with him? Did they see anything? Did they see who took Agent Summers?” Laney asked.

  Trent and Randall exchanged looks once again, and Alexa got a bad feeling in her stomach. She could see it in Jake’s eyes, too. He knew that something was wrong.

  “Jake was the only survivor. Both SUVs transporting the agents were ambushed. The first was taken out by a long-range missile. And the second vehicle flipped as a result of the explosion. The men in the second vehicle were shot and killed. Except for Jake, of course.” Trent’s voice took on a softer tone this time. There was pain in his voice as he had spoken. He’d lost men.

  Alexa looked over at Jake. His head was bowed, his eyes closed. For an agent, it was almost a fate worse than death to be the sole survivor on a mission.

  “I’m sorry, Jake. We wanted to tell you, but—” Trent stepped out of view of the camera and approached Jake, placing a hand on his shoulder.

  “Why me? Why’d they take me?” Jake asked.

  “I don’t know. Could’ve just been the way things went down,” Trent answered.

  “I’m sorry for your loss, but if we want to prevent more deaths, we need to get a handle on this and fast. I don’t know how much time we have until the group makes their move. My assumption is that they were using your agent for information. Or for more dramatic purposes,” Laney said.

  Jake stepped away from Trent and turned to the counter, bracing the edges of it. Alexa wanted to go over and console him, but she remained in place.