It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

by Scott, Kylie

  He reached out, taking hold of my hand. Our fingers curled around each other out of pure instinct. It was like drawing lines in the sand by the shoreline; waves just kept washing them away. Only my messy heart couldn’t take any more hits. We were staying friends for the foreseeable future whether Pete liked it or not. No matter how good his dating game was.

  “Just know, you’re always welcome here,” he said, voice quiet. “You can have whatever you want, beautiful.”

  But that wasn’t the truth. Not really.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The temp had done a great job. I returned to no backlog, everything up-to-date and reasonably organized. Neither me nor the office looked all that different since the last time I’d been there. Though my sensitive and expanding waistline sadly ruled out some of my wardrobe. Lucky I had a few looser summer dresses. Today’s was a green jersey number with knee-length skirt, no sleeves, and a scoop neck that didn’t show too much hormone-enhanced cleavage.

  Comfort was everything.

  But the outfit also looked pretty cute with an amber colored resin bangle and sandals. Maybe I could rock this pregnancy thing. Or at least survive it with some small amount of dignity intact. There were a few half-hidden whispers and looks from the workers, but nothing too bad, given I had doubtless underlined my status as all-time town scandal.

  I’d spent Sunday night in Pete’s spare bedroom again. Shanti did her best to look innocent, but I’m pretty sure she knew exactly what effect their nightly sex-fest would have on me. Disgusting people. Driving me out of the house with their vulgar and loud copulating. They should be ashamed of themselves. All I knew was if I had to listen to her shout “yes, my lion, yes” one more time, my ears would probably start bleeding. Parents having sex was plainly unnatural and should be outlawed at once. Where this new law would leave me once the baby was born, I’d contemplate another time.

  Meanwhile, Pete loved having me back in his house and I secretly loved being there. No major lines were being crossed so long as I slept in my own room. And it was only temporary.

  An older gentleman marched into the office wearing a pinstriped suit, his face set in grim lines as he checked out the place. Apparently nothing pleased him, since the pissy expression remained. It took me a moment to recognize him. He was Pete’s dad, and the years hadn’t altered him any. “Peter Gallagher in?”

  “He’s out on site, but I expect him back shortly.”

  His gaze fixed on me, even more lines digging in beside his mouth. They weren’t from smiling. “You’re the girl, aren’t you?”

  “Yes, I am ‘the girl.’” I swiveled in my office chair to face him directly, speaking with an excess of politeness. “Anytime, anywhere in the world, when someone is talking about a girl, they are in fact talking about me. Amazing, huh?”

  He scowled at my words, and I smiled up at him. A smart mouth rarely gets you out of trouble. But it does make trouble a lot more fun to be in.

  “I remember you.” His lip curled in distaste. If only he had a villainous mustache to twirl, it really would have completed the picture. “He brought you to the house that time.”

  “That’s right.”

  “And now you’ve—”

  “Dad.” Pete strode in, depositing his tablet and sunglasses on the top of my desk. “I didn’t know you were planning on stopping by.”

  “Your sister called me.”

  His voice dropped. “Right.”

  “I should have heard it from you,” said his dad.

  Pete faced him, hands on hips. “And you would have, when I was ready to tell you.”

  “How could you be so stupid?”

  “The baby might be unexpected, but Adele and I are both happy about the news.”

  “You’ll be paying for this mistake for eighteen years.” He jabbed his finger into Pete’s chest.

  “Dad—”

  “That girl has her hooks in you now. Soon enough there’ll be an ungrateful brat just draining you dry.”

  “That’s enough.”

  Spittle flew from the old man’s lips. “Getting had by some young piece of ass. I thought you were smarter.”

  My whole body went rigid, but I stayed put. Kept quiet.

  “I said, that’s enough!” Pete grabbed his father’s arm, hustling him over to the door. “How dare you come here and insult her? This shit, Dad, is exactly why I didn’t tell you. It’s also why you won’t be a part of either my or my child’s life ever again.”

  Mr. Gallagher’s eyes were big as moons. “W-what?”

  “As if I would allow you near my child,” said Pete, hands trembling and jaw set. “I’m sorry Mum died, but we all lost her. We all went through that. And instead of being a decent father and being there for Chrissie and me, instead of showing us just an ounce of love now and then, you turned into the sort of unmitigated asshole I wouldn’t even inflict on my worst enemy.”

  His dad sputtered in outrage.

  “We’re done—I mean it. You just managed to blow any tiny chance you ever had of knowing your grandchild. Now get out of here and don’t come back.”

  The old man drew himself up tall and then charged out the door. My ears rang at the sudden all-consuming quiet. Though my thundering heart soon filled the space. Holy shit.

  “Jesus, what a prick,” said Fitzy, standing in the hallway beside my father.

  Damn, there’d been a full audience. I hadn’t even noticed they were there. When he turned, Pete’s face was tight, gaze grim. It was like he’d shut down completely. Everything locked and bolted tight.

  “Are you alright?” I asked, not daring to reach for him.

  “Fine,” said Pete, grabbing his sunglasses but leaving the tablet. “Sorry about that. Are you . . . you’re good?”

  “Yes.”

  A nod. “Good. Okay. I—ah, I’m heading out for a while.”

  Fitzy, my father, and I all nodded, but said nothing. We watched in silence as Pete followed his father out the door. Though I highly doubted there’d be any tearful forgiveness in the parking lot. I was more concerned he might take a swing at the bastard. That would be a bloody disaster. I dashed over to the glass door. All clear. There was no sign of Pete’s dad, who seemed to have had the good sense to make a quick exit, at least. Pete got into his truck, slammed the door, and backed out of the lot. I kept right on watching until he disappeared from view.

  Dad’s hands rested lightly on my shoulders. “He’ll be okay, sweetheart. Just give him some time to cool down. Glad he finally kicked the asshole to the curb. That’s been overdue a long time.”

  I nodded. “Yeah. He’ll be alright.”

  “Of course he will.”

  But I wasn’t quite convinced.

  “He does not sound like a nice man,” said Shanti after dinner that night.

  “That’s an understatement.”

  Dad had already gone to bed with a hardcover thriller in hand. Maybe they were giving the orgy a break for the night. Or maybe my new law prohibiting parental sex had finally been passed. Thank God. Shanti and I sat on the front deck so I could keep an eye on Pete’s place. There’d been no sign of him all afternoon and now at nearly ten o’clock, his house lay in darkness. I’d tried calling him but gotten no answer. Who knew where he was, what he was doing, where his head was at? It had to hurt, shutting his father down like that, after all these years. Even if it probably was the right thing to do, the man was still his father.

  “Some people shouldn’t be allowed to be parents.” Shanti swirled the contents of her wineglass. “It sounds like Peter’s sister should have known better than to leak the news to the man in such a fashion.”

  “Mm.”

  Earlier, there’d been rain, leaving the air smelling alive and clean. Underneath were the scents of earth and growth, a faint trace of the frangipani, eucalyptus, and other things in bloom. Frogs croaked from out in the garden. It was hard to miss the lights of the city when you were surrounded with so much beauty.

  I yawned
, my jaw cracking.

  “Why don’t you go to bed, talk to him in the morning?”

  “No, I’m going to go wait over there,” I said, rising out of the wicker chair.

  “What if he doesn’t want to talk?”

  “That’s up to him. I just want him to have the option, and to know he’s okay.”

  “What if he brings someone home with him?” Her dark eyes gleamed in the low light. “When he’s in a mood, he tends to drink, and when he drinks —well, it’s not always so easy for people to break their habits, darling.”

  I swallowed. “Then I’ll come back, I guess. I don’t own him; I mean we’re not . . . together.”

  “I don’t mean to be hurtful,” she said, voice low.

  “I know. But he’s spent enough of his life alone.”

  “Mostly that’s been his choice.”

  “Yeah,” I said, searching for some clarity. “If he doesn’t want me there, then I’ll leave. But he’s always been my friend first. Anyone else, if they’d gone through what he did today, I’d want them to know I was there for them if they wanted to talk.”

  She just nodded. “Our door’s always open to you, darling.”

  “Thank you. ’Night.”

  I wandered across the road in pajamas and Birkenstock sandals. My hair tied back in a messy ponytail. On the off-chance Pete did bring some hot piece home, I’d be looking real good. Not. He didn’t have any chairs on his small front porch. Really should have thought to bring a cushion with me. Instead, I sat down on the dry top step, leaning against the railing to try and get comfy. Maybe this was stupid. My life was so full of wonder. Mostly wondering what the hell I was doing. I guess, in the end, you could only do what felt right. What you’d hope someone would do for you.

  Eventually, the lights inside Dad and Shanti’s place went out. Only the dim porch light was left shining for me. It was just me and the night and my good intentions. That would have to be enough.

  Hours later, I startled awake in the process of being lifted by strong arms.

  “Easy, beautiful. It’s just me.”

  “Pete?”

  “I should have thought to give you keys to the place,” he said, carrying me inside. My limbs ached from my slumped sleeping position on the front stairs, but the familiar scent of him, the heat of his body, all felt far too good. The only light was a lamp on the side table glowing softly, casting shadows on his handsome face.

  “What time is it?” I asked, my sluggish mind slowly waking.

  “A bit after eleven.” His voice was low, rumbling through his chest. But it was clear, and his hold on me was firm. He hadn’t been drinking after all, despite my and Shanti’s worries. “I’m sorry I left you out there waiting.”

  “Not your fault. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

  “You did?” He actually sounded surprised. “You didn’t have to do that. I’m fine. Everything’s good.”

  “He’s your father.”

  “Yeah, well, he’s a shit one. It was about time for me to cut ties,” he said, depositing me carefully on the spare bed.

  I shuffled up into a sitting position, keeping a hand on his arm. He sat on the edge of the bed beside me, his gaze weary. A young boy’s hurt seemed to linger in his eyes, coupled with a man’s regret. My heart ached for him. For a long time, he looked at me. And the world felt very small right then, with just me and him alone in the night.

  “Had some thinking to do,” he said at last. “Went to the beach and walked for a while, trying to clear my head.”

  I just nodded, trying to hold back a yawn.

  “I called Chrissie and told her what happened. She apologized.” He rubbed at his mouth. “My sister still thinks she’s going to break through all the ice one day and finally have a father worth knowing. She thought he’d be happy to hear we were having a kid.”

  “Ah.”

  “Yeah.” His gaze dropped to my middle. “You have a small belly, Adele.”

  “It could be cake, but I prefer to believe it’s baby.”

  His smile was brief. No more than a flicker. “You’re exhausted. I should let you sleep.”

  “It’s fine.” I picked up his hand, toying with his fingers. “I’m here for you if that’s what you want, Pete. I mean, not sex. I don’t . . . we’re not there yet. But, you know . . .”

  “I know.” His hand curved around the back of my neck, drawing me in for a quick kiss. “I’m glad you’re here. At the end of a very shitty day, seeing your face is exactly what I need.”

  I smiled.

  “Not sex, but would you mind if I slept in here with you tonight?”

  “Sure.” I wriggled down in the bed, getting comfortable.

  Meanwhile, he went and closed the front door, turned out the light. In an unparalleled act of strength, I didn’t watch while he pulled off his boots and undressed, stripping down to just his boxer briefs.

  They were gray. Alright, so I might have peeked.

  The mattress dipped and he settled beside me. I reached for his hand, slipping it under the hem of my tank, against my middle. With his skin on mine, things seemed more settled. He was here. He was okay. Or he would be.

  “It’s funny,” he said, voice low in the dark. “You think you’ve dealt with stuff, that you’re fine with it. But it’s like it sits in the back of your head, affecting how you see things, the way you live your life.”

  I stroked the back of his hand in silent support.

  “Thought I was smarter than that, stronger. I fucking hate that I let that happen.”

  “Relationships with parents are complicated.”

  He snorted. “Yeah, they are.”

  “Relying on someone so much, needing them when you’re small and helpless,” I said. “I mean, everyone’s bound to drop the ball occasionally. We’re only human. But some people, like your father, it’s as if they don’t even try. They don’t want to.”

  His thumb stroked across my skin. “That’s not going to happen with our child, beautiful.”

  “I know.”

  “Time to let it go,” he said, rolling onto his side, replacing one hand with the other. “I’m just . . . I’m so through with it. With him being any part of my life. Our lives. Did a lot of thinking today.”

  “Yeah?”

  “I know I haven’t exactly been down with your plan, you getting your own place, us just dating.” He smiled. “But if that’s how you want to play it for now, then I’m good with that. Us figuring things out, moving toward something.”

  I smiled. “Okay. That’s great.”

  The white of his teeth as he smiled back at me was just visible in the low light. And I hoped he wouldn’t crush my heart again. That he knew what he was doing now, what he wanted. But only time would tell.

  “I really like that color on you, darling. It’s a very nice dress.”

  “Thanks.”

  “There we go. Perfect.” Shanti stepped back, examining my updo. Because of course the woman was crazy great with hair along with everything else.

  It was Saturday night and I’d done the getting ready at her and Dad’s house. It was all part of the official dating plan. Despite my nerves, my hands weren’t shaking and I wasn’t sweating too badly. Thank God.

  “You’re amazing,” I said. “I love it.”

  She smiled. “You’re going to knock Peter on his ass.”

  I smoothed down the front of my blue bodycon dress in a mostly forgiving soft fabric. My slight middle didn’t throw things out too much and the rounds of my breasts were sort of spectacular. Since pregnancy was giving me extra curves, I was down with putting them on show. Silver drop earrings, a fancy hairdo compliments of my stepmom, red lips, and nicely emphasized eyes. I was good to go.

  “Peter’s arrived,” she said. “He’s sitting with your father in the living room.”

  “Dad must be loving this.”

  “I asked him to behave himself. But it is the first time he’s ever gotten to send his daughter off on a d
ate. Allowances must be made.”

  “Hmm.”

  She followed me out to the living room, where Pete was indeed wearing a somewhat pained expression, his foot tapping manically against the floor. Dad meanwhile sat back in his chair, his gaze more than moderately hostile. Lovely.

  “Told him to have you back by ten,” he said. “And no funny business.”

  “Dad.”

  “Alright, eleven,” he amended. “He can have a good-night kiss, but should keep his hands to himself. I’ll be watching.”

  I shook my head.

  Pete rose to his feet, resplendent in a black suit with a white shirt, open at the neck. Dark hair done in the slight pompadour style that made him look shit hot. I might have swooned a little.

  “Hey,” he said. “Feel like I should have brought a corsage.”

  “Just you is fine.” I smiled.

  “God, you look beautiful.” He stepped closer, his gaze roving over me. Ever so gently, he slid a hand around my waist to the small of my back, bringing us closer. He even smelled like heaven, himself and a hint of cologne. “I’m a very lucky man.”

  “Yes, you are,” said Dad. “Don’t forget it.”

  The urge to reach up and kiss him, to call off the date and go straight to his bedroom, was strong. But we needed to take these small steps. To do it slow and right so it stuck this time. See if it would work, which I really hoped it would. But I’d been here a time or two before. Not exactly like this, though close enough. My heart on my sleeve, and everything I wanted just within reach. Maybe this time he’d reach back for me.

  “If you keep staring at my mouth like that, this is going to be a very short date,” he mumbled, soft enough not to have his words carry to Dad.

  I blinked. “Right. Sorry.”

  Less carnal thoughts. I could do it. Probably. With the way my hormones were and how good he looked, it wouldn’t be easy. Self-restraint rarely was my thing.

  Meanwhile, Shanti gave a happy sigh, hand resting on my father’s shoulder. Her gaze was all soft and shiny, as if she were about to cry. “You look wonderful together.”