The Awakening

by Joe Jackson

  She thought back to Kas’Yari, and wondered if he had felt out of place among the luranar despite being adopted into a family. Was that the true reason he’d traveled north to help Prince Roltek? It wasn’t all that important in light of what she was seeing. Gnolls and luranar were learning to live side by side – in some cases, in the same domicile.

  Perhaps, she mused, when all is said and done, the races of the world might gain even more appreciation for each other and the victories they can claim together.

  Leighandra lost sight of Max in all the excitement of the village. There were many introductions, and the luranar people took a great interest in the newcomers. Delkantar in particular drew a lot of attention, the people fascinated with his dreadlocks. If Leighandra wasn’t mistaken, she thought there were going to be several luranar with dreadlocks of their own come the morning.

  She smiled but stepped beside Audrei and touched the woman lightly on the elbow. “Do you know where Max went?”

  Audrei looked side to side and something odd crossed her countenance. She forced a smile, though, and said, “He’ll be down by the waterfall, spending time with our son.”

  It took a second for what she’d said to truly register, but then it hit Leighandra like a solid punch to the gut. “Your son?” she blurted. “Oh, Audrei… I’m so sorry. I… I suspect Max would probably rather be left alone, then?”

  “I think he could use the company. Would you?”

  Leighandra nodded. “Of course.”

  Oh gods, she thought. And I thought it was the weight of a crown…

  She made her way southeast toward the falls, where she found Max sitting on a log bench, staring into the cascading water. She started to ask him if she could sit, but instead she kept silent and just did so. He didn’t look at her at first, so Leighandra reached over and laid her hand atop his, and gave a gentle pat. She had such a hard time finding words, and thought perhaps she would just lend her presence, but then the words came to her.

  “Remember what you said to Starlenia the other night? About sharing your burdens with others? You know that goes for you, too, right?”

  Tears rolled from his icy blue eyes. “This is not a burden I can share,” he whispered.

  “Listen to me,” Leighandra said, kneeling before him to try to capture his elusive gaze. “All your burdens can be shared. That’s what friends do. They don’t just share their hopes and dreams, they share their fears, their secrets, their weakness, and they carry each other. I’ll share something with you, all right? When you arrived in Solaris, I wondered how much there really was to your people, and whether the legends of your father were perhaps overstated. But Max, the more I get to know you, the more I wish my people were like yours instead of the other way around. You’re one of the best men I’ve ever met, but like your father, you have your share of flaws. And the biggest one? It’s that you try to carry everyone else’s burdens and not share your own. There’s not a man, woman, or child alive that’s strong enough to do that.”

  He shut his eyes, squeezing out the tears. “Do you know what it is like to lose a child?”

  Leighandra considered his tone. “No, I don’t.”

  “It is not all that uncommon among our people. Our women give birth to several, that the strongest will survive. Yet it is a pain that I cannot even describe, and one that was only made worse by the fact that we had one son and he was the one taken. This very thought makes me feel like an irreverent ass, for what would I do? Give up one of my daughters to regain my son? It shames me… to the point I feel I cannot even mourn my son without disrespecting my daughters.”

  He opened his eyes, the icy blue orbs glistening with the tears. “I have carried this guilt for years now. Every time you hear that song Audrei sings, it is a reminder to me of my failure. That I failed to carry her burden, to keep her spirit and faith alive when the day was darkest and she had to nurse two daughters while reeling from the pain of losing a son. And then every time she looked at me, she felt guilty for not producing a son for me. And I… I could not take away her pain. I added to it.”

  Leighandra rose up and hugged him. “Max, Max…,” she hushed him. “I think I know you two well enough to tell you this: When she looks at you, she feels the same things you do.”

  “What do you mean?” he asked, pulling away from her enough to meet her gaze.

  “That she couldn’t ease your pain, Max. Not that she felt guilty that she didn’t give you a son, but that you were so busy trying to ease her pain, and she was doing the same for you… and you both thought you failed. But I don’t think either of you did. I think, to look at the two of you and the way you carry each other, you both succeeded far more than you give yourselves credit for. And I’d wager she sings that song to bolster you, to try to ease your pain, and not to remind you of hers.”

  Max considered her words and sighed. “How did I ever let so many things go wrong?”

  The chronicler gazed into the depths of his eyes and suddenly realized the other facet she was missing. “It broke you, didn’t it?” she asked, and his ears went back in shame. It was as though she stared directly into his soul. “It broke your faith…”

  “I cursed my God,” he blurted, sucking in a breath after he said it, and he shivered despite the layer of fur and the warmth of the valley even later in the season. “I cursed my God, after everything He has done for me, and this is why the superstitions of my people and the gnolls bother me so. I am no prophet, no messiah, no chosen one, no matter what stripes I may wear or how upright these people believe me to be. I am a sinner, a broken man trying to reassemble his faith. And I believe that is why my father’s sword does not respond to my will.”

  Leighandra shook her head. “No, Max, you’re still looking at things the wrong way. You have a lovely wife; two children I’m still looking forward to meeting; you’re about to become king of the luranar, and that not just for yourself, but so your brother can finally get married! If your god hates you, he certainly has a strange way of showing it.” Max snorted at that. “And if your faith is anything like your wife’s… Max, we all have doubts sometimes, and we all make mistakes! Think about your squire for a moment, or your father – I’m sure he faced the same doubts when he lost his wife. You can mourn your son without disrespecting your daughters… it’s okay to want to have kept them all!”

  The chronicler paused for a moment, wary of overwhelming him or herself. “Your father wasn’t perfect, Max, and nobody expects you to be, either. Don’t focus so intently on the past. Look ahead, love your wife and your daughters, and learn to forgive yourself.”

  Max nodded to her words, his gaze drifting back to the waterfall. “Learn to forgive myself…,” he whispered.

  Leighandra took a seat beside him and laid her hand atop his. “What was his name?”

  “Abraham.”

  The chronicler patted his hand again. “You’ll have a son one day, Max.”

  He looked skyward, then over the waterfall again, and seemed to mouth the words forgive myself again. Finally, he managed a smile. “I know,” he said, springing to his feet. “Thank you, my friend. Come, and I will introduce you to my daughters.”

  Leighandra let him take her by the hand, and they returned to the village, where Audrei was waiting with a misty-eyed smile. Max went over and hugged her tightly, and then the two gestured for the others to follow them.

  ~ * ~ * ~

  Leighandra smiled and laughed at the scene. She sat with the others at the entrance to Audrei and Max’s home, a rounded semi-tent, semi-hut structure. Max and Audrei reclined side by side in the center while their two daughters climbed and frolicked all over them. The girls were the spitting image of their parents, and the chronicler got the sense that luranar pups might advance faster than other races based on their behavior. The toddlers yipped and laughed as they jumped on their father and crawled up his back.

  Leighandra did her best to scratch out an image in her journal, though it proved to be a bit difficult, co
nsidering the children wouldn’t sit still. This is why we fight, she thought. This is why I left the comforts of home, walked into battle with strangers, and continue to walk toward an unknown end facing a demonic god. This is the part that’s often missing from the epics and the legends, as caught up as they are in heroic deeds and fantastic battles. This is why we fight.

  Shadra, one of Max’s brothers, came over and crouched beside the companions. He and his wife had watched the girls while Max and Audrei were absent, since they had several youngsters of their own. “Max, it is time,” he said with the faintest trace of a smile.

  The luranar prince kissed his wife and grabbed his squirming girls to deposit them in their mother’s arms. He rose to his feet, looking much more relaxed now in the simple breeches and tunic he wore, so much of the weight that had encumbered him for months now dissipated. He nodded solemnly to his brother and followed Shadra out toward the center of the village. The others rose and trailed in his wake.

  King Terist was by the cross along with two of Max’s other brothers. Leighandra didn’t know them all by name yet, as she’d only been briefly introduced and, to be honest, they all looked rather similar aside from Terist, the sole black wolf in the family. And that was to say nothing of Max’s aunts, uncles, cousins, and in-laws. There was variety among the luranar, but unaccustomed to them as a whole, Leighandra was still figuring out how to differentiate them.

  I’d think this would be easier, considering how well I was able to distinguish the fures-rir, she laughed at herself silently.

  Disappointingly, the ceremony was performed in their language, so she didn’t understand a word that was being spoken. How ironic that it was Alissiri, the most foreign of foreigners in the presence of the ceremony, who could understand most of it. Turning back, Leighandra watched Max’s brothers remove the golden bands from his upper arm. He took them in his hand and spoke back and forth with Terist for a minute, and then his brothers took the silver circlet from the black luranar’s head and put it on Max’s brow.

  The entire tribe present for the ceremony bowed to one knee, but only for a moment before they rose and let forth a great cheer, punctuated by some howls and yips. Max in turn bowed politely to them and spoke over them for a minute. The more he spoke, the more confident he appeared to become. Leighandra couldn’t help but wonder if she was seeing him become all the best of his father right in front of his people, and hopefully without any of the doubt and hardness his father had carried with him for years.

  Max beckoned to Shadra then, and after glancing at his wife, the other luranar male approached the new king. Max held the golden bands out to him and words were exchanged, and then Shadra called back among the gathering. His eldest son, no older than ten or twelve by Leighandra’s guess, ran and stood straight before his father and uncle. Shadra laid a hand on his son’s shoulder and spoke to him, and then the boy said something to Max formally.

  Max gestured the young man forward. He knelt down and wrapped the golden bands around the boy’s upper arm, and the tribe let forth another great cheer.

  “Max mentioned the crown rarely gets passed up to the older, only down to the younger,” Leighandra whispered to Yiilu. “He must be designating his nephew crown prince until he has a son of his own.”

  The elf smiled and applauded with the tribe. “They are such a fascinating people. Their forms and their faith are so alien to us, and yet so familiar. I am proud to have met them, and to have borne witness to this happy event.”

  Galadon nodded. “And now that he is a king, the nations might better listen to what he has to say when it comes to the coming conflict.”

  “You think the sword will respond to his will now?” Starlenia asked.

  The knight shrugged, and Leighandra kept what she knew to herself; Max could reveal his secrets if he chose. Galadon said, “Hard to know. It could be something as simple as doubt that’s holding him back. I had no doubts when I picked it up because I’ve used it before, and owned one much like it.”

  “Tomorrow, we’re headed north again,” Delkantar said, nodding to everyone’s looks. “Max said so himself. We’re not here for an extended stay. He’s assigning some of his brothers to get the tribe and their Caerumach neighbors ready for war, and we’re continuing onward. We’ll either be heading straight to the next seal, or stopping by Karinda’s tower to see Alissiri safely off home, whichever we reach first.”

  “I think we are staying until afternoon tomorrow, though, that he may perform a wedding ceremony for Terist and his mate,” the druidess said, and then she pointed.

  When Leighandra and the others looked back, Terist was down on one knee, proposing to his gnoll lover. Despite knowing it was coming, the gnoll still had her breath taken away, and she hugged the black luranar tightly when he stood back up. Max nearly dodged her crushing hug when she turned on him, but she pulled him to her bosom again, much to the amusement of the rest of the tribe – and Leighandra. She couldn’t help but chuckle at just how tall gnoll women could be.

  Shortly after, the chronicler watched from a little distance away as Max began assuming the duties of the crown during the dinner feast. He was surrounded by several of his brothers and brothers-in-law, and was obviously assigning them tasks to see to in his absence. The only one not present in his circle of administrators was Terist; Leighandra figured he was being given time to tend to his pending marriage.

  After a while, though, Max excused himself and came to sit with his friends and share the last portion of the meal with them. Most curiously, he had a tankard of beer in his hand.

  “Max, you’re drinking!” Starlenia shouted.

  The luranar king’s brow creased. “Why would I not be? This is a joyous occasion.”

  “How do you feel?” Leighandra asked him.

  “Less tense than I expected. My brothers are assuming much of the responsibility I will not be able to tend to on the road. We will be dispatching emissaries to the Caerumach and the kwarrasti, and organizing efforts to seal off our lands from the west. If there is something evil afoot in the lands of the shakna-rir, we must take care not to be absorbed by their empire. We should continue to see to gathering these seals, and then we may see to finding the other flames before we organize the kingdoms. The question will be whether we are to fight the usurper in Aurun Ch’Gurra or the Tempis’ra first.”

  “If we can put the rightful queen back on the throne in Aurun Ch’Gurra, we may be able to count them as allies against the Tempis’ra,” Galadon said, and Max nodded. “The nations all aligned would be powerful enough, but if we were to add the shakna-rir empire, I can’t imagine this Tempis’ra would stand a chance.”

  “I can guarantee you that the empire would aid us,” Lion said. “My sister will put the full might of the empire behind us, should we restore her to the throne.”

  Audrei excused herself to go put their daughters to bed, and was agreeable to Alissiri going with her. The girls were curious to the medusa’s appearance, as was the rest of the tribe, but they had no frame of reference by which to judge the woman other than Max and Audrei’s open acceptance.

  Leighandra watched the women and children walk off, and turned back to Max. “I hate to seem intrusive, but are you and Audrei planning – or I guess expected or required might be the appropriate words – to have children again this season?”

  “Hmmm? Oh, no,” he answered with a shake of his head. “No, we have a much more pressing matter before us, and now that I have passed the rings of succession to my nephew, I am less worried about it. Let us succeed in our task, and then all of us will have the time and luxury to think about and see to such matters.”

  “Will you be able to supply us with horses?” Galadon asked.

  “Yes, but keep Galrinthor away from the mares,” the luranar king chuckled.

  “Just until we’re done with this quest,” Starlenia added with another exaggerated wink. “Then you can charge these silly luranar all the stud fees you like.”

  Max sh
rugged but didn’t contradict her.

  “Horses should speed up our travels considerably,” Delkantar said. “Once we’re back in the northlands, we’ll make excellent time, as long as the snows don’t come early this year…”

  “And the seal is still pulling straight north, correct?” Max asked.

  Yiilu nodded. “The next could be in any number of cities.”

  “Ester, Farview, Mikhit, Silverius, Emerald City… and even Dira Ch’Tori are all directly north of us,” Delkantar mused. “Question is: Do we stop in each of those cities along the way and see to their undead issues?”

  “I don’t think we can afford to, unless it’s something specific,” Galadon said. “If it’s minor issues, the guards, priests of Kaelariel, and local adventurers – or, better yet, the Red Mask – can take care of those. We have a larger issue to concentrate on and winter is coming, so we shouldn’t delay any more than necessary.”

  “As much as it pains me to say so, that is probably the correct course,” Max said. “We are too few to see to every problem. Let us concentrate on the biggest, though we can see to the smaller ones if, as you say, they are specific and easily identified.”

  “Sounds good. And we leave tomorrow?” Starlenia prompted the king.

  “I will perform my brother’s wedding in the morning, and then we can return to our journey,” Max answered. “There will be no need for us to stay for the festivities. Everyone knows what is at stake.”

  “Let’s get a good night’s rest, then,” Galadon said. “I don’t want to have to teach you lot how to sleep in the saddle on the first day.”

  “Agreed. However, I must ask one favor of all of you,” Max said, and he met each pair of eyes before him. “Regardless of what has happened here tonight, I want you to continue to call me Max. Please do not call me Your Majesty or anything of that sort. You are my friends and my equals.”