The Color of Your Skin Ain't the Color of Your Heart

by Michael Phillips

  I handed the matches and striker back to Katie and ran for the stairs. But as I reached the parlor I realized we didn't want to fill a lantern. We wanted to see what was inside that oil chamber! So I just grabbed one of the parlor lanterns and hurried back down with it into the cellar. In another minute we again had light about us from the new lantern, and Katie and I were seated staring at what we'd discovered.

  "I don't believe it," said Katie, shaking her head. "We've been looking for it all this time, and I see it with my own eyes, but I just don't believe it."

  "No wonder you couldn't light the lantern!" I said. "Gold is a lot heavier than oil!"

  "And here it was all the time, right under our noses ... in plain view!"

  "That must be what your mama figured," I said. "She sure hid it in a place nobody'd think to look for it. We didn't!"

  "I guess I will be going to see Mr. Taylor tomorrow!" said Katie, finally starting to laugh. "He will really not believe it! Wow-can you imagine ... my uncle's gold hidden right in the oil chamber of this old lantern that I thought my mother had just thrown away!"

  T SEEMED LIKE WE WERE ALWAYS COMING AND going from the bank and that we were always having to worry about money. And I guess that was true. Money was what made the world work the way it did. And when Katie's mother had taken out those two loans during the war to keep Rosewood going while Katie's father and brothers were gone to fight, it meant that money would be at the root of Rosewood's problems until the loans were either paid off or else the plantation taken away from the Clairborne family altogether.

  And so here we were heading to the bank again. But this time we had something with us that we hoped would put the problem with money behind us for good and make it so that Katie didn't ever have to worry about it again.

  We pulled up in front of the bank. Katie gave me a look that said, Well, here goes nothing!

  "I'll wait for you here," I said.

  "Oh no," said Katie, climbing down from the wagon. "You're coming with me, Mayme. We found this together and you're as much a part of Rosewood now as I am, even if my name is Clairborne and yours isn't."

  "But do you really want-" I began.

  "Yes," Katie interrupted with a determined smile. "-I want you with me. If you're still worried about what people think, Mayme, don't you know by now that I don't care? And we've both got half Daniels blood in us, don't forget that. And this is Daniels gold, not Clairborne gold, which I figure makes it half yours."

  Sometimes there was no arguing with Katie! I nodded, returning her smile, and got down from the other side of the wagon. Then together we walked toward the door of the bank.

  There were two or three other men who worked in the bank and who were used to seeing Katie by now and called her by name as we walked inside. But as we made our way toward the manager's desk, and when Mr. Taylor glanced up and saw us approaching, the expression on his face was one that had an unmistakable hint of annoyance on it. Every time he tried to see or talk to Katie's mother, the only person he could actually talk to was Katie, and he had gotten a mite exasperated by it.

  "Hello, Miss Clairborne," he said a little coldly as we stopped in front of his desk. He didn't so much as glance at me. It was as if I wasn't even there. "I assume you are here concerning your mother's loan."

  "Yes, sir," said Katie.

  "No doubt to tell me that your mother couldn't come herself and sent you instead," he went on, "and that she wants you to tell me that she doesn't have the money quite yet and that she would like to ask me to be patient and extend the due date just a few months."

  "No, sir"

  "I'm sorry, Miss Clairborne, but as I explained in-"

  Suddenly he seemed to realize what Katie had just said.

  "That's not why I'm here," said Katie.

  "Then ... what is the purpose of this visit?" asked the bank manager, now more confused than irritated.

  "To pay off the loan, Mr. Taylor," said Katie. "Or at least part of it."

  She reached into the pocket of her dress and pulled out the handful of nuggets she'd put there. She set them gleaming and yellow on his desk right in front of him.

  The man's eyes got big and wide as Katie pulled her hand away and he saw the eight pieces of gold lying there in front of him.

  I thought his eyes were going to pop right out of his head! It was deathly quiet for a few seconds. I think the other men in the bank had been sort of secretly watching, and the moment Katie pulled out the chunks of gold, their jaws had dropped too.

  Finally Mr. Taylor reached forward and picked up one of the chunks to examine it more closely, and then his voice broke the silence.

  "Why ... why, there must be eight, maybe ten ounces here."

  "Yes, sir."

  "But where did you get them?"

  "Do you remember me telling you about my uncle," answered Katie, "when I brought you those gold coins to put in our account?"

  "Yes ... yes, of course. You said he'd gone to California and had come back with some gold he'd left your mama for safekeeping."

  "Yes, sir. Well, he left this with my mama too-besides the coins. He gave it to her to keep for him and take care of."

  "Where is your uncle now?"

  "We don't know, sir."

  "Has your mother had this all along?"

  "Yes, sir."

  "Then why did she take out the loans?"

  "Because she didn't want to use her brother's gold, sir. It wasn't ours and she thought he might come back for it."

  "But now she is prepared to use it toward the loan?"

  "Yes, sir."

  "Why is that?"

  "Because we think ... that is, my mother thinks he might not come back for it after all. My other uncle thinks he's dead, and so it's not worth losing Rosewood just to wait and find out."

  "Yes ... yes, of course. That makes a great deal of sense. Well, well, Miss Clairborne, this certainly does change things," he said, now almost smiling for the first time.

  "Will this be enough to pay off my mama's second loan?" asked Katie.

  "Well ... I am not sure really. Three hundred fifty dollars is a lot of money, and you know, of course, Kathleen, that one cannot simply put pieces of gold like this into a bank account."

  "Oh . . " replied Katie. She sounded surprised.

  "It must be weighed," said Mr. Taylor. "You have to find out what it is worth. That should not be a problem," he added. "-I can take care of it for you. I'll take it to Oakwood. But that will take time. I cannot actually credit your account-that is, your mother's account-until the gold is valued and is sold. Perhaps that is what your mother wanted me to do."

  "Yes, sir," nodded Katie. "But how long will it take ... what about the loan?"

  "I will see to it in plenty of time that the deadline does not pass, you can be sure of that."

  "Thank you, Mr. Taylor."

  "Fine, then-it is all settled," he said. "I will see to the technicalities and advise your mother of the proceeds. Shall I apply the entire sum as payment on the loan?"

  "Uh ... yes, sir-that will be fine. We're hoping ... that is, my mother hopes with the balance in our account that this will be enough for the loan."

  "I should think that might be possible, even likely. Why don't I just consult the ledger and see where we stand."

  He stood and went to a cabinet and pulled out a drawer and then took out a file. A minute later he returned.

  "Your account presently stands at one hundred eightyseven dollars," he said. "It was down to one hundred fourteen, and then with your deposit of seventy-three dollars last month, that brought the total up to the one hundred eighty-seven. As I said, the loan is three hundred fifty dollars, so judging from the weight of what you've brought me, I would think it would be sufficient to cover it.-I shall place these in the safe," he added with a smile, scooping up the nuggets in his hand. "We don't want anything to happen to them, do we!"

  "No, sir," said Katie, glancing around. It was good there weren't any other customers in the
bank right then, especially Mrs. Hammond! We just had to make sure she didn't hear about this or the whole world would find out! "And ... you won't tell anyone about the gold, will you?" Katie added. "Mama wanted me to make sure of that too."

  "No, of course not. It will be our secret. I will put these into a sealed envelope before I place them in the safe. Nobody but the bank employees will know."

  "I would like to take out ten dollars from the account too, please," said Katie.

  "Of course. I will see to that too."

  He left for a few minutes. When he returned, his hands were empty except for the ten dollars Katie had asked for.

  "Well then, Kathleen," he said, "I shall be in touch with you." Then he smiled. "I must say that this is the most unusual payment I have ever received in all my years of banking. Imagine, a tiny little gold rush right here in Greens Crossing!"

  A few minutes later we walked back to the buggy, Katie clutching the first ten-dollar bill I'd ever set eyes on in my life.

  She climbed up, turned the horses around in the street, and we headed back toward the general store, where we wanted to buy some things before returning to Rosewood.

  "Let me see it!" I said as we rode along.

  Katie handed it to me. I was surprised that it just felt like a little piece of paper. A coin made of gold felt like money. And looked valuable too. But how could a piece of paper be worth so much!

  HE NEXT SEVERAL DAYS WERE ABOUT THE HAPpiest ones since Katie and I had been together. I'd never seen Katie in such jubilant spirits.

  And I guess I was too. It was happening slow, but it was gradually sinking in just what an almighty wonderful thing had happened between us-that we had learned to love each other, learning to help and care for each other and to live together and fend for ourselves with each other, and then after all that to find out we'd been related all along.

  Cousins! I still could hardly believe it!

  But like I said, it was slowly sinking in.

  And the other thing it was doing was giving me a feeling of belonging. That's one of the things about being a slave-you never feel like you really belong anyplace. What other folks call home can never really be home to a slave because it's not yours, and you might be sold at any time.

  But finding out my mama had been at Rosewood, and now being here with Katie like I was and finding out I was blood kin to Rosewood's mistress, Katie's mama, who was my aunt-what a feeling of belonging that gave me inside!

  This was my home!

  A real home! A place where Mary Ann jukes-or maybe my name was really Mary Ann Daniels, I wasn't sure how that kind of thing worked-really and truly belonged and could call her own.

  It felt so good! To think that at first I had been angry. I could hardly believe I had been so blind to the good side of what Mr. Daniels' disclosure meant.

  We didn't have long to celebrate, though, before another question reared its head again that we'd kept ignoring all along because we didn't know what to do about it. Just when we'd found out who I was, suddenly we realized all over again that we still didn't know who Aleta was.

  Two days after Katie had taken the gold into the bank, we saw a buggy coming toward Rosewood. We managed to get Emma out of sight and Aleta clanging the hammer in the blacksmith's shop again. I headed for the clothesline as Katie made her way toward the house.

  "Who is it?" I asked her as we walked away from each other. "Can you see?"

  "I can't tell yet . . ." she began, "-oh ... it looks like it might be Reverend Hall."

  "What could he want?" I asked.

  "I don't know," she said as she walked toward the kitchen door.

  I don't know why, but I'd been nervous about the minister all along and didn't want to hang around too close. I was dying to hear what he wanted, but I'd just have to wait and find out from Katie.

  It was the minister all right. "Hello, Kathleen," he said as he got down from his buckboard and he and Katie greeted each other in front of the house. "Is your mother home?"

  "No, sir," answered Katie.

  "It's been quite some time since I've seen her, or any of you, at church. I thought it was about time I paid a visit to see if everything's all right."

  "Yes ... yes, we're fine."

  "Still no word from your father?"

  "No, sir."

  "You remembered to tell your mother what I said when I saw you that day in town?"

  "Yes, sir."

  From where I was I saw Reverend Hall glance toward the blacksmith's shed where Aleta's arm was probably already starting to get tired. When all this pretending of ours was over, Aleta was going to have almighty strong arms, that was for sure! The thought crossed my mind that they might be talking about her, and I wasn't so far wrong.

  "Kathleen," said the minister, "do you remember my telling you about the man who had a drinking problem, whose wife and daughter were afraid of him?"

  "Yes, sir," answered Katie a little slowly, unconsciously glancing down at the ground.

  "Well, the situation finally became so bad," the minister went on, "that the lady and little girl left home. Nobody has seen them for a long, long time."

  He looked at Katie, and Katie said his eyes were full of question.

  "And ... what happened?" she said.

  "The man has sobered up because of it," said Reverend Hall. "He knows what happened was his fault and he feels terrible about it. But he hasn't heard from them and can't find them anywhere."

  By now Katie was getting nervous as she listened!

  "You haven't seen a lady with a little girl anywhere, have you, Kathleen?"

  "A lady with a girl? Uh ... no, sir."

  "And if you did hear about anyone like that, or if you saw someone you didn't know or if someone came asking for help, you and your mama would come and tell me?"

  "Uh ... what's the lady's name, Reverend Hall-in case I see her?"

  "Mrs. Butler," he answered. "Her husband is Hank Butler, who lives over outside of Oakwood. Well, Kathleen," said the minister as he climbed back into his buggy, "we'll be praying for your father and brothers. And I would certainly like to visit with your mother sometime. Will you tell her I stopped by?"

  "Yes, sir."

  As soon as he was gone, Katie came over and told me what he'd said.

  "Do you think he suspects she's here?" I asked.

  "I don't think so," she answered. "Even though he was asking lots of questions, he didn't have that suspicious look people sometimes have."

  "Like the lady in the store," I said.

  "Mrs. Hammond always has it!" laughed Katie. "But now that we know, Mayme," she added seriously, "it seems like we've got to tell him ... don't you think? Aleta can't stay here forever."

  I didn't have an answer to that.

  Katie went to fetch Aleta from the blacksmith's shed.

  "Who was it?" asked Aleta.

  "Aleta," said Katie seriously as they walked back toward me, "that was the minister from town. He was looking for you and your mama. He told us where your father lives. He said that your father has stopped drinking and is worried about you."

  "You didn't tell him I was here," said Aleta, half in question but with a hint of anger showing through in her voice. I could see the old fire in her eyes like how she used to look at me.

  "No," replied Katie. "But don't you think we should? You could trust Reverend Hall. He said your daddy-"

  "I won't go back to him!" Aleta interrupted. "You can't make me. If you try, I'll just run away. You can't make me go back home!"

  "But you have to sometime."

  "Why? You and Mayme and Emma don't have to go back to anyone."

  "Aleta, we don't have anyone to go back to. If we did, we would.

  "Mayme's got a father too, and she's staying here with you.

  "But she doesn't know where her daddy is. It's different, Aleta. Besides, her daddy doesn't have a home at all."

  "Well, Mr. Daniels is nice. He's not at all like my daddy. You can't make me go back. If you do
, IT run away. I promise I will."

  Katie and I looked at each other and shrugged. Aleta could be mighty determined when she wanted to be, and now was one of those times.

  We didn't know what was best to do.

  AYING OFF HER MAMA'S LOAN WITH THE GOLD we'd found had put Katie on cloud nine. Even the uncertainty about Reverend Hall's visit couldn't dampen her spirits. It was all the better knowing it was the last loan and that there were no more surprises waiting around the corner, no more letters from the banker about having to foreclose on Rosewood.

  Though Aleta was a little quiet for a day or two, Katie was happy and singing and smiling, and her cheerful mood made all the rest of us happy too, even if it hadn't been for my own happiness inside about Katie and me being cousins. Even little William seemed to catch the spirit of it. He was getting on to the age where he was trying out his legs to see if they could support his tubby little tummy and the rest of him. Emma was so delighted with everything he did and wanted to show us something new every two minutes it seemed.

  "Look, he's gwine git ter walkin' any minute," she exclaimed at least thirteen times a day. "Look, Miz Katie ... look, Mayme ... did you see dat ... did you see him! He's doin' it ... he's doin' it!"

  But every time it seemed like William was about to take off and walk across the room, he'd fall back down on his fat little rump. But it was funny watching him. He was so cute, babbling his baby talk and crawling around and getting into things. He was so curious. Everything he touched he wanted to put in his mouth!

  One day about a week after we'd been to the bank, we were all in the kitchen laughing at William as he kept trying to stand up, then tottered a few steps before falling down again. Jeremiah had come out early in the day and was outside ploughing one of the fields because it was starting to get real warm and Henry said the ground was just right for turning. I'd just come back a while earlier from taking him some water and something to eat and now we were watching William when suddenly there was a knock on the door. At first I thought it might be Jeremiah since we hadn't heard anyone ride up.