To Commit

by Carolyn Brown

  She eased off the bed and switched on the light, went to the bathroom and stared at her reflection in the mirror. The same Stella looked back at her that had awakened that morning. “I am an adult—I will behave as one from now on,” she removed the last dregs of her makeup and washed her face. “This was a lapse in judgment and will never happen again. Lord, I hate to face him at breakfast after that little episode, but it’ll have to be done.”

  She turned on water in the shower and dropped her jeans and shirt on the floor. Tomorrow was another day, as Scarlett had said in Gone With The Wind. Stella would pretend nothing had happened when Rance came to the breakfast table. He’d probably be just as anxious to avoid things as she would, and if he did ask for a date she was going to refuse him. The man had more power over her than she was willing to deal with.

  She awoke the next morning at five o’clock. There was nothing left of the night before but a guilty conscience and the faint whiff of his cologne on her shirt when she picked it up from the bathroom floor. She dreaded going downstairs to pretend the whole night had meant nothing because she was a terrible actress.

  Rance had spent a sleepless night. He was sitting in the living room when he heard the tell-tale squeak as she stepped on the fifth stair step at a few minutes past five. Nothing had prepared him for the way he felt when his lips met hers in those earth shattering kisses. It was as if two souls had met after three lifetimes of drifting around in eternity. The search had ended and they’d found their mates, two ex-spouses too late.

  He’d meant to give her a few minutes in the kitchen then slip in there before the rest of the house was up and moving. He’d pretend as if it were any other morning and he wanted a cup of coffee before breakfast was served. Why couldn’t he swallow his pride and admit she’d gotten under his skin and squirmed into his heart?

  Because every time I look at her I’ll be reminded that Julie broke that same heart and I can’t trust women.

  They arrived in the kitchen at the same time. Rance raised an eyebrow in her direction, but she ignored it. Her legs trembled and heart fluttered but she wasn’t making the same mistake twice. Burn me once, shame on you; burn me twice, shame on me.

  Rance cleared his throat. “Good mornin’. Are we having pancakes?” He watched her put the iron grill on the stove, taking up two burners.

  “Yes, it’s Granny’s old recipe,” she said.

  Rance wanted to bypass the pancakes and spend another hour on the couch, then go on to the bedroom, leaving a trail of clothing down the long hallway or up the steps. But that wasn’t going to happen. Stella might be a divorced woman but the old adages about divorcees being hot to trot didn’t apply to her. She was a lady. What was it she’d said? She wanted a lifetime thing. Well, Rance was fresh out of lifetime things to offer. At one time in his life he’d had one but he’d given it to the wrong woman.

  He watched her pour perfect circles on the griddle “Granny Brannon was a very wonderful lady.”

  “A very wise one, too,” Stella said. “I hope someday my granddaughter will say the same thing about me.”

  “I’m sure she will,” Rance turned and went to look at the squirrels scampering through the pecan trees in the back yard. They had not a care in the world. It didn’t matter that winter was on the way. They ate. They slept. They played. He’d take a lesson from them. He’d live simply in Murray County, Oklahoma and he wouldn’t let his next door neighbor affect him any more.

  Chapter Four

  Rance opened his eyes and stared blankly at the ceiling, a lady curled up in the crook of his right arm and another one at his feet. His wondered if Stella was up and making breakfast yet. He sighed deeply and wondered why it seemed like every waking thought involved Stella. Especially since the night they’d shared all those passionate kisses. Why couldn’t he be content to live with his ladies, his babies as the fellows called them, and put the tall, blond inn owner out of his mind?

  He pushed the big, orange cat off his arm and nudged the black and white one away from his feet. “Okay, ladies, it’s time to rise and shine. I don’t care if you are more bear than feline at the crack of dawn, it’s Saturday morning and we’ve got business to take care of.”

  He dressed casually in jeans and a red polo shirt. His desk top looked like a tornado and a hurricane had a wrestling match in the middle of it. He sighed as he looked at the paper work on his desk. Vowing it would be organized by the end of the day, he picked up the first piece. He would categorize it all into several manageable stacks which his secretary could take care of first thing on Monday morning. He managed to get it half done before he threw up his hands and walked out the back door. An icy breeze chilled him. The hired hands were already out around the horse stables. A fleeting image passed in front of his eyes. He’d hadn’t seen Stella since he’d checked out of Brannon Inn the week before but there she was, a vision with her long blond hair tied back in a pony tail.

  “Well, damn it anyway,” he clenched his hands into fists.

  He opened the door to the barn to the drone of a dozen men all talking amongst themselves about the days work. They’d all brought their families and moved from Texas to Oklahoma with him. Some resided in Sulphur, a few in Davis, and one in Mill Creek. When he’d approached them about selling out in Waco and moving to a small southern Oklahoma town most of his staff had agreed to relocate. It made his job easier because he didn’t have to retrain the help and besides most of them were friends. When they noticed him the noise stopped. Before he could say a word, his cell phone set up a howl in his shirt pocket. He answered it and they went back to their conversation.

  “Well, my, my, did I catch you at a bad time?” A feminine voice asked.

  “Yes, you did. Who is this?” He asked bluntly. It wasn’t Julie, his ex-wife. She had the gravely voice of a long time smoker. A bit sexy, but not like this high pitched, up-beat woman on the other end of the line. It sure wasn’t Stella. He’d know that voice anywhere. At midnight with his eyes shut. In broad daylight in the middle of a busy shopping mall. It was sweet fire.

  “This is Jewel Carpenter. You might not remember me. A few weeks ago we shared a few meals at a little bed and breakfast in Sulphur, Oklahoma,” she said, jogging his memory back to a dark haired pixie lady who liked to take long hikes in the woods.

  “Of course, I remember you. I just didn’t recognize your voice.” He said.

  “Well, we’re in Davis for the weekend, and . . .” she waited.

  “And?” He said.

  “I’m not used to asking outright for a good-looking man to take me to dinner,” she said. “But I can do it. Are you busy tonight?”

  “No. I mean, yes, I do have plans. I thought you and your family was going to the Ouachita Mountains and how did you get my cell phone number?”

  “We are but not this weekend. We had such a good time in the Arbuckles we decided to give it another try before our other trip. You really were paying attention that night. I got your cell phone number from the register at the inn before we left. I’m very resourceful. We were going to stay with Mrs. Barnum but she is going away this weekend. We sure had a good time that weekend didn’t we?”

  Anger rose up like a thunderstorm inside Rance. “Brannon!”

  “No bantered. Remember, you said you couldn’t live without steak and we were eating spinach lasagna. Miss Barnum did make a good meal, but most women her age know how to cook.”

  He clenched his teeth. “Brannon. Not Barnum. Stella’s name is Brannon!”

  “Well, pardooooon me! So what have you got going with Miss . . . Bran-non?” She stressed both syllables of the name. “How did you two get on first name basis?”

  “That’s none of your business, Jewel. Sorry, I’m busy tonight.”

  “Where are you going? To Dallas with her?” Jewel asked rudely.

  “That, too, is none of your business.”

  “Well, can’t blame a girl for trying. Go have a good time with the old lady in the fancy Wyndham Hotel. May
be you’ll even go to the Travis Tritt concert with her. I wouldn’t waste my time on a country music singer. While you’re there with Mrs. Brantham, remember the young woman you passed up. I hope you can’t get me out of your mind. Good-bye, Rance,” she said in her sexiest voice.

  “Good-bye,” he said.

  And thank you Jewel.

  A grin teased the corners of his mouth and his eyes twinkled. He picked up the phone again and dialed the hotel in Dallas. The manager said they certainly could put Mr. Harper in a room for the weekend.

  He walked over to the men waiting for the day’s instructions. “Hey, do the minimum chores this weekend and go home. Half can do morning duties. The rest can take care of the evening ones. Or divide them by Saturday and Sunday if you want a whole day with your families. I’m going to be out of pocket tomorrow and Sunday.”

  An hour later, Rance pulled on a pair of tight, crisply starched jeans and a white western shirt. The cats were busy batting a toy around under the bed and didn’t offer an opinion on how he looked. He’d heard that folks own dogs but merely feed cats. Maybe that was why he liked them so well. They were independent, granting him the favor of rubbing their soft fur when it suited them, and demanding nothing from him but a warm body to sleep next to and a full dish of cat food. It was hard to believe they were really female.

  He checked his reflection in the mirror. He was crazy. Stella would take one look at him and tell him to drop dead. What they had that night was just the by-product of her anger toward that creepy Joel. It had nothing to do with him. Any man would have filled the bill just as well. So why was he hauling a suitcase and his boot bag out to the truck? She didn’t want him and he wasn’t about to get serious about a woman. Not after Julie. Not after the pain that broke his old cowboy heart in half.

  I need a vacation. I’ve been working hard for two solid weeks. We’ve got things up and running and the plans drawn up to put hired help houses on the property by spring. The place can run itself for two days. He argued with his conscience.

  Stella picked up a leather suitcase and matching garment bag and made her way to one of the bedrooms just off the sitting room. “Wow, this suite is downright fancy. Okay if I have this bedroom?”

  “Hey, it’s fine with me. I’ve stayed here lots of times and I don’t plan to spend much time in this suite anyway.” Tina hauled her suitcase into the other bedroom.

  Stella sat on the end of the bed and soaked up the atmosphere. If she didn’t see a single show, dance even one two-step, or eat anywhere but in the closest McDonald’s, it would be fine with her. Just getting away from Murray County for a couple of days was sheer heaven. If only Rance could be beside her.

  “Now where in the hell did that come from,” she mumbled.

  “What?” Tina asked from the doorway.

  “Just thinking aloud,” Stella answered.

  “Well, let’s go shop. I’ll change and we’ll unpack later. I’ll call a cab to take us to the Galleria. I’ve got reservations already made for lunch at The Grill on the Alley, then we’ll shop some more and go see if Travis Tritt fills out his jeans as well as he did when we were in high school.”

  “Wow, you’ve really got us all mapped out. I thought we’d just eat at the restaurant in the hotel and play catch up on the gossip while we swim in the indoor pool.”

  “Not this time, lady. Can’t find any of those sweet talkin’ devils from around these parts in the hotel. We’re on the prowl and we’re lookin’ for a rich imported tom cat for you. We don’t want a good ole boy from Oklahoma or even northern Texas. Nope, we’re off to shop and eat in the fancy lunch place. Besides, I have an ulterior motive. That’s where the pretty cowboy I told you about works. He’s a waiter there and his name is Brock.”

  Stella whistled through her teeth. “Surely you’re kiddin’ me about a waiter. For crying out loud girl, you are a famous actress now. You’ve hit the big time with that last movie. Lord, girl, I wouldn’t be surprised if you don’t get some kind of award for your part.”

  “I’ll be back in a minute,” Tina smiled. “You get ready for a day on the town.”

  Tina had changed into a pair of tight black jeans, a red western blouse with a cut out neckline and lace up Roper boots when she came back. “An award would be great but Brock is even better. I met him in Hollywood when he was taking a year off school and thinking about acting. He didn’t like the ups and downs, so he’s working as a waiter while he finishes up his last year of college.”

  Stella pulled her hair back and secured it with a wide clip. “I can’t believe you came to Dallas for a weekend fling with some wannabe actor you picked up in Hollywood. Your mother would drop with a heart attack if she knew that.”

  “Don’t be naive, Stella. I didn’t pick him up. I let him pick me up and I dang sure didn’t forget him. I may never forget him. But I couldn’t have a lifetime of something that intense. It would kill me dead in six weeks. You don’t look so bad yourself, girlfriend. I may have to take a back seat to you tonight. Look out Dallas here we come. But first we’ll take a stroll through the mall and maybe even buy a few things, like good little tourists should, so you can tell your momma and Maggie all about it. I’ll take Mother a new outfit and she’ll never know I’m here to meet Brock. She wouldn’t have a heart attack if she knew what I really do when I fly into Dallas and stay a couple of days before I go home, but she’d probably drop down on her knees and pray for my erring soul until we all hear Gabriel’s horn signaling the rapture.”

  Stella shook her head. She wondered what Rance would think if he knew she was in Dallas and ‘on the prowl.’

  She scolded herself as they waited for the elevator. Damn it, I didn’t plan an impromptu get-away with Tina and spend mega-bucks so I could conjure up visions of Rance.

  Tina had been in the class below her at Sulphur High School and part of the reason Mitch made his earth shattering decision to quit college and go to Hollywood. If a small town girl who had crooked front teeth and carrot red hair could make it big in the movie industry, it was a cinch that someone as handsome as Mitch could have any part he wanted.

  Two days before Tina had called and asked Stella to join her in Dallas for a weekend of fun and then drive her home for a two week visit with her mother. At first Stella said she was too busy. Her sister, Maggie, and niece, Lauren, were coming from Coffeyville, Kansas and she planned to spend time with them. But Tina twisted her arm, slightly, and Stella agreed quickly.

  “Okay, lead the way,” Stella stepped out of the elevator and toward the hotel’s front door.

  Tina pushed through the doors and headed toward a waiting cab. “Look out Dallas. Here we come!”

  Tina prattled like a tourist guide as they wandered through the mall. “And now we have Gucci. Do we want a new purse or shoes? Notice please that purses are on sale at fifty percent off in this pre-Christmas sale and my mother would probably love one. She can use it to carry her money to the church and pay the preacher to spend hours praying for my wayward soul.”

  Stella laughed. Tina was a positive, up-beat friend and she was glad they’d decided on the spur of the moment to take the trip. “Oh, Tina, you are awful.”

  “Yes, I am. I’m going inside to buy the purse. Did you know that this mall was featured in The Devil Wears Prada? I wanted that part but somehow my agent couldn’t even get me an audition and today I don’t give a dang because I’m going to see Brock.”

  “Methinks maybe Brock is the devil the way he makes your eyes shine,” Stella teased as they looked through the purse display.

  “He could be. You know that old saying ‘the devil made me do it’? Hey, what do you think the devil really wears?”

  Stella answered before she thought. “Blue jeans and brown contacts.”

  “Aha, I hear a story,” Tina stopped.

  “One that’s already ended so it doesn’t bear repeating. How long has it been since you saw Brock?” Stella changed the subject.

  “Six months and that’s
too long,” Tina said.

  “You said you couldn’t take a lifetime of something as intense as Brock, so why are you going to see him again? Aren’t you just setting yourself up for a bad heart ache?”

  “I can’t take a lifetime, but I can take two days at a time.”

  They shopped the rest of the morning and went to the restaurant at exactly noon. Tina had made reservations just as she’d promised so they didn’t have to wait in line. The minute they were seated a tall handsome man strutted over to their table, raised a heavy dark eyebrow and laid his hand on Tina’s shoulder. “Well, well, look what the Hollywood wind blew over here.”

  “And look who is still trying to get through med school.” Tina bantered right back and reached up to touch his hand.

  “What would you like to do tonight?”

  “We’re doing the Travis Tritt concert. Want to go with us?”

  He sized Stella up and down. “Can I bring my room mate to entertain your friend?”

  Stella promptly kicked Tina under the table.

  “No, she’s already got plans,” Tina said.

  “Then let me take your order ladies and I’ll see you after the concert. I’ve got some studying to do so I’d better have business before pleasure.” Brock whipped out a pen.

  “Good looking.” Stella murmured when he was out of hearing range. “And he actually made you blush.”

  “If you had the memories I’ve got, you’d blush, too.” Tina admitted. “Hey, you look a little red around the cheeks yourself. What are you hiding?”

  “Not one thing,” Stella lied. “Sounds like you are bit bad.”

  “Yes, I am. But not to the point of stupidity. At least not yet.”

  They were thirty minutes late to the concert and arrived among stares and wolf whistles with a few recognizing Tina and begging for autographs. A short, feisty red head and a tall blond, both in tight blue jeans drew attention like honey draws bees, and before they’d been there five minutes a cowboy was sitting beside Stella. He was tall, had the prettiest blond hair, feathered back just perfectly, wore his jeans bunched up over his boot tops, and a grin that said he liked what he saw beside him.