by Bijou Hunter
Desi looks at me as if I’m nuts before smiling because she likes that I’m nuts.
“Who’s the father?” Vaughn asks my dad rather than me.
“The giant.”
“Goliath,” I say, insisting they use his name. “Dean Midkiff. You know, the tall fella.”
Vaughn shakes his head in sympathy. “That’s gonna be one big fucking baby.”
“It might not be,” I mumble. “And I have wide hips. It’ll be fine.”
The men look at me like Desi did a moment ago. Then they remember how there’s a small human with comprehension skills listening to our conversation.
“Oh, well, C-sections aren’t that bad,” Vaughn says with his mouth full of cookie.
“Who’s having a C-section?” Raven asks, walking into the room with Max close behind.
“Shelby created life with a giant. We assume it’ll need to be cut out.”
Raven is a lovely blonde goddess, but the look she gives me is so obnoxious that I consider punching her face.
“Well, they’re not bad. I mean, you have to take it easier than with a normal delivery. However, I know how much you enjoy sitting around watching TV. It’ll be like a vacation.”
“First of all, get bent, blondie,” I say, flipping off Raven, who snorts. “Second of all, did you have a C-section?”
“No. I did it like nature intended. With lots of pain and cussing.”
“Did you cuss, Mom?” Desi asks Maude, who tries to disappear during the conversation.
“I plan to,” Max answers to distract from an awkward Maude. “I want to say all the cuss words. I’ll just need to learn them first.”
“Typical, Max,” I mutter, giving her a wink, “always wanting to learn shit.”
“I want to cuss,” Desi says. “How many words are there?”
“A billion, and it’ll involve a lot of studying,” Maude says.
“Then, I don’t want to cuss.”
We all enjoy Desi’s choice to give up rather than work real hard on something dumb.
“Back to C-sections, are they painful?” I ask no one in particular.
“No,” Raven lies while my mom nods. “Lark had her babies cut out, and then she walked that shit off.”
“You know, I can text her right now and ask,” I mutter as I pull out my phone.
“Fine. It’s tricky, but you have so many people who will pamper you afterward.”
Grinning, I slide the phone in my back pocket and hug Mom. “Raven’s been tamed. What a fabulous new look on her.”
The blonde shoots me a death glare.
“Where’s Ramona?” Dad asks, refusing to get drawn into the lady angst building around him.
“Taking a nap while the boys do,” I explain. “She was sad about Shane leaving.”
“She loves him so much,” Mom coos, smiling big before suddenly losing her happy expression.
“What’s wrong?” I ask, wrapping my arms around her.
“Not here,” she whispers.
Mom, Dad, and I ditch the crowd in the kitchen and head to the backyard where the dogs goof around in the yard. Zathura sits on the porch, looking overheated in the spiffy little vest I bought him.
“Look at that sad motherfucker,” Dad mutters about the dog while Mom grabs me for a hug.
“What’s wrong?” I ask again, consoling her.
“I want you to be happy.”
“I am happy. That’s what all my smiling is about.”
“You were crying earlier,” Dad corrects just to be a smart-ass.
“I’m hormonal from the baby.”
“What’s with this giant?” Dad asks, crossing his arms and giving me his Reapers frown. “Is he your man now? How come I never knew you were together? Are you moving in with him?”
“We’re just friends who screwed once.”
“What’s wrong with him?” Dad growls. “Does he think he’s too good for you?”
“Hey, why do you assume he’s the one keeping this relationship fuck-oriented? Can’t I be the horny slut?”
“No,” he says, and Mom gives me a sympathetic headshake.
“Well, I’m okay with him not wanting a commitment. I mean, everyone here has been hooking up and getting hitched and doing the nuclear family drill. I’ll be the one to blaze a new path by being a single mom.”
“Isn’t that what Maude is doing?” Dad says, just whizzing all over my triumphant bullshit.
“Yes, but her thing isn’t a choice. She got knocked up by an out-of-town stranger.”
“Poor thing,” Mom whispers, now looking more sympathetic to the blonde inside than her own full-of-shit daughter.
“Don’t leave me,” I say, grabbing her hand. “I need you to only pay attention to me. I’m very needy. I normally share you with Shane, and you know how much I hate that.”
“You love your brother so much.”
I lose my steely gaze and smile widely. “He’s such a darling baby boy, and his sons are little versions of him. He’s the best.”
Accustomed to Mom and me doting over Shane, Dad keeps the conversation moving by announcing, “I want you to find someone else.”
“Well, obviously,” I say, wrapping my mom in my arms and swaying with her while I smile at my grumpy father. “I can’t live alone forever with my bastard baby. I’ll need a man to fix things around the house and check scary noises in the basement.”
“Can’t your brother do that?”
I gasp dramatically. “Dad, what if a monster is in the basement? Do you really want Shane to be the one to be eaten? Fuck that. We’ll send my second-choice husband to deal with that shit. Baby bruv must grow old with his hot little wife and adorable sons.”
“She has a point,” Mom tells Dad.
My father desperately wants to remain upset over Goliath and my surprise pregnancy. I’m his little girl, no matter how old and annoying I get. That’s why he’s a good dad.
“I love you too,” he says when I dive for him. “I still think this guy is a loser.”
“He has issues. Shitty mom, absent father, no siblings to dote on, screwed over by his former club, bad ex-girlfriends, always hitting his head on things. The man has suffered like few before him.”
“Bullshit.”
“Don’t be jealous that he has more to whine about than you do,” I tease, winking at my handsome father. “I know your parents were wet farts, and you used to have a mohawk, which would have been hilarious and caused others to mock you. The point is you overcame all your suffering to win the heart of the best woman.”
Dad’s frown darkens. “You’re laying it on a bit too thick.”
“How dare you imply Mom isn’t the best!
“I’m talking to Goliath when he returns to Shasta.”
“About what?” I ask innocently while Mom fights a grin. She’s so proud of me for standing up to my father. I swear she just can’t feel disappointment in her kids. That’s why she’s the best.
“Shelby,” he grumbles.
“Dad, he’ll just say ‘yomp’ and ‘nomp’ and frown a lot. He’s not much of a conversationalist.”
“I want to know his intentions.”
“You’re making me sad.”
“Baby, you deserve the best.”
His words warm my heart, forcing me to hug him. “Yeah, but the best didn’t show up. The only guy I’ve liked since I was a horny teen isn’t interested in forever. He just wants right now. I can either get nothing, or I can get something. You getting in his face and calling him a loser means I get nothing. And he and I can’t even be friends because his precious man feelings will be bruised by your scorn. Then our kid will have parents who don’t get along.”
“Dylan, let Shelby fight this battle. Your daughter is smart and tough.”
Dad cups my face with one hand and Mom’s with his other. He offers us a tender smile before saying, “No.”
There’s no talking to my father when he slides into his stubborn groove. I decide to play with the do
gs before the day gets too cold. Mom and I take turns throwing the balls. Dad sits on the porch, internally threatening a man he met maybe once. Through it all, Zathura watches us while trying to wiggle free of his vest. Much like me changing my father’s mind, the dog is fighting a losing battle.
THE GOLIATH
I ain’t doing much to hide the fact that I don’t want to be on this trip. Sure, I keep my mouth shut, no bitching out loud. Stone-faced works for Utah, but I know I got eyes on me like he doesn’t.
Our first stop after leaving Shasta is a town not far from Louisville. Pema is the location of another Reapers’ chapter. I assume I’m gonna meet an ass-load of people, but we end up eating at a bar with only a few bikers inside. Mostly, River and Shane seem to be showing off to their childhood friends, Heidi and Gunnar O’Keefe.
Last summer, I met their father—Judd O’Keefe—who I think might want to kill me. His kids seem fine. The chick is hot, and the guy says little. This club doesn’t have a president. I don’t understand why. The Reapers took over Pema like they did Shasta and another town, Conroe. Pushing out the weaker clubs, they installed new leadership. Except not here.
“Heidi runs a tight operation,” River tells Hugh, Utah, and me when he joins us at our table. “But she’s a chick and has to do everything behind the scenes. The club needs a president.”
Hugh asks what I’m thinking, “What’s wrong with her brother?”
“Gunnar is brute force. He doesn’t want to be the face of anything, and his personal skills aren’t polished like mine,” River says and flashes his pretty boy smile. “I wish one of my brothers could take over here. I’d love to have Majors boys running more than one chapter, but Maverick doesn’t want to be in charge of shit. My younger brothers aren’t leadership material. Hell, they let our baby sister boss them around.”
“Are we here to help them with something?” Hugh asks, talking for the table since Utah and I aren’t the chatty sort.
“No, I just wanted to rub my club in Heidi’s face.”
“Why?”
“She called me ball-less once, and I’m a petty bitch who never lets shit go,” River says and smirks at Heidi sitting with Shane nearby. “We’ll leave after lunch.”
“And go where?” I ask when Hugh just eats his sandwich.
“Indiana. Before the sun sets, I want to hit a campground, north of Indy.”
“Why there?” I push.
“It’s just a ride, Goliath. Think of it as a team-building exercise like those corporate douches utilize. I have specific places I want to stop at. Otherwise, we’re just riding. Is there a reason you don’t want to be on the road?”
River holds my gaze, and I can’t tell if he’s fucking with me or planning to leave me in a ditch somewhere.
“I’m on parole,” I remind him.
“Not a problem. Your parole officer knows you’re going on a totally legal work trip. Shelby handled it.”
Frowning, I’m edgy having them go behind my back. They deal with my fake job and organize my meetings with the parole officer. I’m used to them pulling my strings, but I don’t like it.
“Are we good?” my president asks, frowning now.
“Dude, chill,” Hugh tells River. “The guy might have hemorrhoids or tender balls. Don’t read so much into shit.”
River offers an easy smile for his newest recruit, but his gaze doesn’t leave me. I choose to look away. While I refuse to bow, I’m not looking to be buried in Indiana, either.
“We’ll leave in an hour. Heidi said cops hang out at the state border. Be ready for them to pull us over and ask questions.”
Despite River’s worries, the Indiana highway patrol doesn’t start shit when we ride past them. That’s a numbers game. There are four patrol cars, one cop in each. There are twenty guys on hogs. If shit gets out of control, there’ll be four dead pigs. Rather than harass us, I notice them pull over a minivan driven by an elderly couple driving too slow and a Mustang driven by a teenager with a lead foot. Everyone’s playing shit safe today.
THE WEIRDO
Before dinner, I head upstairs to wake Ramona from her nap and help get the boys up. She opens her eyes and smiles. Then she remembers Shane isn’t in Shasta and she won’t see him for days. Her dark eyes flash with panic before settling into resigned unhappiness.
“Can I sleep in here with you tonight?” I ask as she climbs out of bed. “The house feels empty without Shane and River.”
Ramona gives me a little smile. Maybe she knows I’m more worried about her. Or perhaps she’s relieved to have someone keep the bed warm while her man is gone.
We walk to the next bedroom, where Iggy bounces in his crib, and Ozzy stares at the mobile above him. Iggy jumps faster and starts babbling like an insane person when he sees his mama. I try to imagine my kid one day being that excited to see me. Can’t do it. The baby doesn’t feel real yet.
While Ramona picks up Iggy, I lean over the crib and say hello to Ozzy.
The little guy smiles up at me and wiggles. He looks just like Iggy and so much like Shane as a baby. I pick up Ozzy and grab supplies to change diapers. Ramona and I return to her bedroom, where we rest the boys on the bed. Iggy and Ozzy look at each other and make happy noises.
“I think Taylor wanted to go on the ride,” I tell Ramona as she changes Iggy’s diaper, and I clean up Ozzy.
“Why didn’t she go?”
“Because I didn’t. I’m holding her back. I failed,” I say, suddenly depressed.
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“I wanted to go on the ride, but then I thought about Goliath being there and how awkward it would be. That’s why I bailed. I used the excuse that I couldn’t ride for so long without peeing. It’s not true. I just felt insecure. That’s why Taylor didn’t go. I’m a horrible friend, and maybe the worst person who’s ever existed.”
Despite knowing I’m overly dramatic, I feel crazy suddenly. Sad and happy. Clingy yet wanting people to leave me the fuck alone.
“Maybe you can go next year,” Ramona says as she reaches over Iggy to pat my hand. “I’ll watch your baby. By then, you’ll know Goliath better. Even if you hate him, you’ll be used to feeling that way. It won’t be so new. Then the Fearsome Foursome can ride together.”
“You’re the best person that’s ever lived,” I say and wrangle Ozzy back into the legs of his onesie. “You also make beautiful babies.”
Ramona’s eyes shine with pride when she looks at her boys. I know she misses Shane. They’re not good apart, but he needs time with his club, and she needs to support him. My baby bruv and his lady love are so adorable together.
“I kinda hate you,” I say while she rests on her side next to Iggy drinking his bottle. “Your happiness makes me feel lame.”
“I don’t know anything about relationship advice. I do think you’re trying too hard to make things happen. Shane and I weren’t looking for love when our paths crossed. River and Max weren’t either. Taylor and Kelsi seemed to come out of nowhere. Things just happened, no one forced it. Maybe you need to relax and let love find you rather than you searching for it.”
“But I’m the only one alone.”
“Maverick and Maude are too.”
“But he has Alba,” I say, grinning at the thought of his pretend girlfriend. “Plus, he’s younger and a guy, and I think he might be dead inside.”
“Why would you think that?”
“Because I’m trying to win the conversation, Ramona. Why else?”
Grinning, she leans forward and kisses Iggy’s head. He pulls his bottle from his mouth, says something that doesn’t sound like English, frowns when milk escapes his mouth, and then returns to drinking.
I look down at my baby nephew and see Shane. “Your husband was the most beautiful baby that ever existed until these two. I doubt my kid will be able to compete.”
“I’m sure it’ll be gorgeous. Your family is beautiful, and Goliath has attractive qualities.”
“What
does that last part mean?”
“People say he’s attractive.”
“You don’t think he’s hot?”
“I don’t think anyone’s hot except Shane.”
Snickering, I love how protective Ramona is over Shane’s ego. She can’t imagine any man matching up to hers.
“I wonder if our baby will look weird,” I say and nuzzle my nephew. As soon as I lean forward and my hair creates a drape around his face, he reaches for a lock and holds on as if trying to tame a stallion. “What if our baby has a big head or something?”
“It won’t matter. You’ll love your baby so much that you won’t notice those things.”
“You’re helping my heart so much, Ramona,” I say, still stuck in Ozzy’s grip. “I’m forever thankful my brother saw you from across the street and instantly began stalking you. I can’t imagine how pathetic life would be if he acted like a normal man.”
Ramona looks at her boys and gets a little misty-eyed over everything that’s happened in the last few years. She went from having only the Band to love her to enjoying a brand-new family along with an extended group of friends. Already emotional, Ramona nearly starts bawling when I ask, “Which baby is mine to take downstairs?”
Her dark eyes flash from Iggy finishing his bottle to Ozzy sucking on his hand. She looks overwhelmed as if choosing one will be an insult to the other. Sometimes, loving so many people is too much for Ramona.
Good at taking charge, I pick up Ozzy. “If I get to choose, I want the baby. It’ll be good practice.”
Exhaling with relief over not having to make the decision, she picks up Iggy, who points at his baby brother to see if we noticed how he exists. Calm again, Ramona grins at her son’s reaction.
I know Ramona will have trouble for the next few days. This will be the longest she’s been away from Shane since he entered her life. Max seems fine so far, cooking for everyone. After people are fed, though, she’ll be restless without River. It’ll be my job to keep them distracted, and I take that responsibility very seriously.
THE GOLIATH
