by Bijou Hunter
“Are you Violet?” I ask because I can’t think of anything else to say.
“Are you Shelby Campbell?”
Nodding, I don’t think to ask how she knows me. Sliding the blanket off her head, I promise, “We’re going to help you.”
Violet looks back at the house. Her face remains passive as she whispers, “I stayed above the water.”
Shane climbs into the driver’s spot while Taylor takes the passenger seat. My brother glances back at me. “They’re on their way to the other vehicle.”
Nodding, I look back at Violet, who sits next to me like a ghost. She’s both here and somewhere else. I expected tears. Instead, she remains very still and calm.
“Violet, we’re not with the police. The law wouldn’t help. If we go to them now, they’ll want to know what we did to O’Meara.”
After taking a minute to put together what I’m saying, she asks, “What will you do with me, then?”
“Take you to our house for now. We’ll figure out the next step once you’re ready.”
Violet looks at where I hold her hand. I suspect she’ll pull it away, but she just stares into my eyes with her blue ones.
“My parents are dead. You live in my old house. Is that where we’re going?”
“Yes. Do you need to see a doctor? Are you hurt?”
“No.”
“Do you have anyone we can call?” I ask, feeling guilty for asking this traumatized woman to stay hidden after she’s spent years locked away.
“No. My parents are dead,” she says again. “How long can I stay with you? Do I need to find a job?”
Taylor looks back at me, wearing a frown. I had a lot of ideas about how Violet would behave if we found her alive. Crazed or catatonic. I wondered if she knew about her parents. Would she have a kid after her time with O’Meara?
Violet is calm, though. I realize maybe I underestimated how mundane evil can become when faced with it day after day.
“You can stay with us for however long you want,” I whisper against her ear. “You’re not alone.”
Turning to me, Violet’s calm resolve breaks a little as we reach the Boulders part of Shasta. “I kept my head above water,” she says as if I should understand. “I knew one day someone would come, so I didn’t drown.”
“Can I hug you?”
Tears prickling her once-emotionless eyes, Violet nods. I hold her, hoping she can find solace in my arms.
Once at the house, we move quickly from the SUV to inside, where few people are up. Max sits in the kitchen with Greer. Otherwise, the house is silent.
“Would you like to clean up and change?” I ask Violet, who stands in the kitchen she once shared with her parents.
“Yes, please.”
Taylor and I take her upstairs. While Violet showers, I plan to find clothes in Max’s room.
“Ramona is too short, and my ass is too big,” I explain to Taylor. “Max is tall and thin. We’ll steal her clothes for Violet.”
Taylor tells me to wait in the hall while she finds the clothes. I realize I’m getting emotional again.
Standing outside the bathroom door, I know I need to see Goliath. Shane and Taylor aren’t enough. I need to feel my love’s arms around me to know the world still makes sense.
Maude and Desi stumble down the stairs and find me in the hallway. I signal my preggo pal that the maybe turned into a yes. Her expression is almost as unreadable as Violet’s had been. They’re both good at hiding their feelings. As for me, I’m nearly sobbing by the time Taylor returns with the clothes. She opens the door a crack to slip them into the bathroom for when Violet’s done.
“You need sleep,” my best friend says when I cling to her. “You’ve been wired ever since we made the ID.”
“Where is Goliath?”
“Probably downstairs.”
As much as I want to go to him, I can’t leave Violet. “She knew who I was,” I whisper to Taylor so as not to wake Ramona and the boys down the hall.
“You saved her,” Taylor says as we hear the shower turn off. “You didn’t give up. Now you need rest.”
“She needs me to be strong.”
Taylor gives me a gentle smile. Yes, I know I’m losing my shit. I’m unbelievably hormonal. Before the baby, I could divert my emotional shenanigans into something positive. These days, I effortlessly descend into a hysterical-lady state and wallow there. The one thing that would help me isn’t an option. Goliath might be downstairs, but riding his dick will have to wait.
Violet opens the door, wearing gray sweatpants, a black “Kiss the Chef” T-shirt, and white socks. She seems surprised to find me teary-eyed. Then she notices my bump.
“You’re having a baby,” she says in a tone that reminds me of Desi.
“This summer.”
“I used to babysit for local kids.”
There’s something terribly young about Violet, and I get an incredible urge to hug her again. But I also sense crying on her is a mistake.
“What would you like to do?” Taylor asks in a soft voice. “Maybe we could go downstairs where we can talk normally.”
When Violet seems worried, I explain, “My nephews are sleeping down the hall.” I take her hand. “Would you like me to bore you with a lot of stories about how cute they are?”
Nodding, Violet gives me a sweet smile as we walk downstairs. How is she so calm? Once we’re in the kitchen, Taylor offers a quick lowdown on who lives in the house. Violet nods, even though I doubt she can keep all the names and relationships straight.
“Are you hungry?” Max asks, always wanting to feed people.
“Should I cook?” Violet asks.
“No,” I say and lean closer. “Max is obsessed with cooking for people. If you try to help too much, she’ll cry. I’m not kidding, either.”
Violet nods, eyes bright. “I was making breakfast when you came to the house. I would love to eat something.”
Her demeanor is so relaxed that I feel okay slipping away while she speaks to Desi and Maude. I don’t know where Goliath, River, and Maverick are. Shouldn’t they be back?
“Had to ditch some gear,” River explains when I step out to the porch and give him a scowl. “Is she okay?” When I nod, he asks in a softer voice. “Are you okay?”
“Where’s Goliath?”
“Right there,” he says, and I realize I somehow missed the large man standing only feet away.
Staring at my giant lovebug, I mumble, “I might need a nap.”
River smiles and heads inside with Maverick close behind. I look at Goliath, lingering back near the steps.
“Are you feeling shy?” I ask when he doesn’t immediately join me.
“You look weird.”
“I am weird.”
Smirking, he finally moves his fine ass into the reach of my hug. “I cut his head off.”
Relaxing against him, I smile at his handsome face. “I’m so overwhelmed right now. Like about-to-sob-like-a-baby kind of overwhelmed. I need you to stay with me.”
“Where else am I gonna go?”
“Nowhere. You’re mine, and you can never leave.”
Goliath gives me a lazy smile, and I forget about what our morning entailed. I just enjoy how I own this man’s big, beautiful heart.
Then his smile is gone, and he steps back. I turn to find Violet in the doorway.
“I thought you left,” she says, sounding scared for the first time.
“This is my man, Dean,” I say, walking inside. “Don’t be intimidated by his size. He’s the sweetest.”
“Really?” she asks him, seeming unsure.
Of course, Goliath shakes his head. Though I roll my eyes at his unwillingness to play along, Violet smiles.
“I didn’t want you to leave.”
“We were up all night planning to attack the house. Most of us will crash soon, but I’ll do it here.”
Violet nods, having a little more trouble hiding her fear now. We return to the kitchen, where Max does what
she loves to do. Soon, Ramona and Shane show up with the boys. Maude drives Desi to school while Lineke takes the dogs for a walk. Violet smiles easily and speaks to anyone who speaks to her. Still, she remains hyper-alert, overwhelmed probably.
Soon, Goliath, Violet, and I hide in the sitting room where I put on a movie.
“I only really watch horror movies,” I say when she sits on the floor with Hansel and Gretel. “I can’t think of any other movies to watch. What would you like for me to put on while I nap?”
“You don’t have to put anything on. I can just sit here.”
“Yeah, well, I need the TV on,” I say and smile at Goliath, who sits in a chair with his feet up.
Violet gets a head nod from him, and she exhales softly. “Did you know this house is haunted?” she asks and cuddles with Hansel, who climbs in her lap. “A horror movie with ghosts would be fun.”
I don’t know what will happen with Violet, but her suggestion gives me hope that everything will work out. After starting “The Others,” I try to get comfortable on the couch. She remains on the floor, lying on her stomach, seeming like a kid without a care in the world.
Despite her calm, I remain uneasy. Finally, I stop watching her and the TV and just focus on Goliath. He sleeps sitting up, snoring just a bit from his awkward position. Not once did he complain about us staying here rather than going home where he could stretch out.
His heart really is a big, beautiful thing, and it’s all mine.
THE CHAPTER WHERE THE STORY ENDS
THE GOLIATH
Before Shelby took over my life, I used to sit outside for hours, just letting the world go by. Nothing mattered beyond breathing. I ain’t got simple dreams anymore.
Or the patience to wait for the good shit. But nothing important in my life happens fast.
Took forever to get old enough to leave home and get away from my mom. Those five years in prison felt like ten. I first saw Shelby in June and didn’t get her in my bed until September. Didn’t make her mine for a few more months. Yomp, sometimes, I’m why things take forever to get good.
Turning forty means I already spent four decades waiting for this life with Shelby. I ain’t got the patience to wait for everything to come together anymore.
The house is real in my head, but it’ll be at least a year before it’s real enough to live in. Shelby put my ideas into a building plan, and we’ve already dug a well for our future plumbing. The process is moving along, but not fast enough. I see how slowly River’s house is going. He won’t be moved in until fall. But I figure he’s still young enough to be patient.
Besides, he’s already got his little girl, and I have a bunch of months left before I get to hold mine. There are times when I wake up and roll over to wrap myself around Shelby. My hand goes to her bump, and I feel my daughter kicking me. In those moments, I can barely wait to meet her. But some things can’t be rushed.
I don’t trust my fathering skills. Never had one to learn from, and I spent forty years not knowing anything about babies or kids. But now I’m surrounded by little people. I figure I’ll practice on them. Well, I didn’t think of that idea, but Shelby put it in my head, and she’s usually right.
I start by helping Shelby babysit Iggy, who’s bigger and less likely to start bawling. The kid talks to me about shit I don’t understand. That’s normal, I guess. He’s got a lot to say but doesn’t know the words.
I get like that sometimes with Shelby. My heart feels all kinds of shit that I can’t express to her. I hope she understands, and I suspect she’d mention something if she didn’t. That’s the good thing about loving a bossy woman. She won’t suffer in silence. She’ll either speak up or plot to get her way.
At first, Iggy gets a little scared when I pick him up. I can’t imagine he’s up much higher than when his dad or River hold him. Maybe he’s just scared of me.
Nomp, he tugs on my beard like we’re old friends. Not an ounce of fear. When I smile at him, he smiles back. Kids ain’t as tricky as I thought.
Iggy helps me with his brother. That first time I change a diaper, Shelby laughs so hard that she needs to piss. Ramona gets so nervous she looks ready to faint. Iggy, though, hands me a diaper and babbles a whole bunch of instructions. I’d seen it done enough to know the gist, but his confidence in my skills helps.
Ozzy survives his diaper change, and Shelby finishes giggling long enough to ask to see me naked at our little box house. We’re rarely there, but it’s close enough for us to visit for fucking a few times a day.
Violet is why Shelby sticks closer to the Victorian. The girl can’t really go anywhere, what with her supposed to be dead. People are gonna recognize her eventually. We take her to a doctor over the border in Ohio. Back in Kentucky, we find a dentist a few towns over. We use the name Vi Campbell on the paperwork. That won’t work forever.
“She’s one of River’s sisters,” Shelby says when a neighbor asks too many questions about Violet during a walk around the neighborhood.
With her wearing a hat and sunglasses, Violet can pass for one of the Majors. And people around Shasta know River’s sisters ain’t the kind of women to mess with. That neighbor walks away real quick.
Again, this tactic is only gonna work for a while. A few people in Shasta knew Violet personally. One day, one of them will see her, and there won’t be explaining away the resemblance.
That’s why Violet mostly stays at the Victorian. The upside to having so many people packed into the creepy house is that she’s never alone. This is important to her, even if she won’t admit it.
Often, Shelby and Violet sit out back, talking about whatever women talk about. I think it’s mostly just Shelby telling stories. Violet doesn’t want to talk about anything related to what happened with O’Meara. She never says anything about her parents’ murder-suicide in this house. Violet is living deep in denial. Shelby thinks that’s a mistake, but she grew up in a family where people felt safe.
“You didn’t tell your mom about those college guys,” I say one night at our box house when Shelby seems too worried. “Violet sees you as her mom in a way.”
Shelby gets the message. She offers to take Violet to a therapist. When that gets shot down, Shelby suggests having someone come to the house instead. Violet goes through the motions for a few visits, but she doesn’t tell the woman anything important.
“I didn’t drown,” Violet explains to Shelby after asking to stop the visits. “I survived. I don’t need to worry about the details.”
Shelby doesn’t like that answer, but she understands it. Winnie ain’t getting fixed with therapy, and forcing shit doesn’t work. Violet might act like a kid sometimes, but she’s a grown woman. If she doesn’t want the visits, then we ain’t making her sit through them.
“You’re going to be a great dad,” Shelby says one night after I explain my thinking about how Violet needs to be free for a while before she can look back at when she was locked up. “You understand things that I don’t. We’ll teamwork the shit out of parenthood.”
I doubt Shelby knows how much I needed to hear that, but I’m getting nervous as fuck as her due date approaches. While I was impatient to meet my little girl, now I’m afraid to fail at being her dad. It’s gonna kill me if I’m the weak link in our family.
“All kids think shit about their parents,” Shane says one day when I mention it at the Saloon. “You’ve met mine. They’re great, right? My dad rarely lost his temper, and Shelby could be insane at times. I was stubborn and only learned once I failed at something. He still keeps his cool. My mom thinks I’m perfect. She praises me when I suck. Even though they were great, I still thought ugly shit about them. Thought I was smarter and tougher. Got mad about my mom being messed up. Got pissed that my dad told me no. That’s what people do while growing up. Teenagers are awful because they’re not kids or adults. They’re kids who think they’re adults.”
Hugh gives me a head nod. I know he doesn’t like his parents. If he and Shane agree, they
must be right.
“One day, Kirby is going to look you right in the eye,” Hugh says, holding my gaze, “and she’s going to say something mean as fuck. She doesn’t love you. She hates you. She thinks you’re shit. You failed as a father. She wishes she was never born. She wishes you were never born. Whatever bullshit she comes up with isn’t anything new. But then she’ll get over it. I didn’t hold a grudge, and my parents never loved me unconditionally. You’re not going to hold back that way with your girl. I bet you’ll spoil her rotten. But no matter how great a dad you are, she’ll eventually give you grief. If she doesn’t, then you ought to worry.”
“I probably will spoil her,” I admit. “I acted like a dick toward Shelby plenty when we started up together. These days, I want her to have everything. Can’t imagine I’ll be any different with a tiny Shelby.”
Shane’s expression does something to me. I’m around fifteen years older than him, but his approval means a lot. He didn’t welcome me easily. I saw him struggle to be okay with me fucking his sister, let alone making a life with her. He wants Shelby to have everything too. Seeing him accept that his sister picked a good one makes me proud in a way few things do.
His dad lets me in a lot easier. One day while Dylan and I fish in a Shasta pond, he explains how he worried Shelby would never find someone.
“Well, I used to think she and River would make something happen. Figured he was the only one to get her to overlook her man-stink problem. Then when he found Max, I assumed Shelby would be a spinster,” he says, chuckling before adding, “Don’t tell her I said that.”
“Well, for whatever reason, she likes my stink.”
“It’s because she belongs to you,” Dylan says right away as if he just knows it’s true. “When you own a woman’s heart, she’ll put up with all kinds of shit to keep you. Don’t think Winnie doesn’t do the same for me.”
