Green, Sharon - Mind Guest.htm

by Mind Guest

  "You're not by any chance thinking of me as being as young as I look,

  are you?" I asked suddenly, bringing a flash of startlement to his

  eyes. "Bellna is this young and innocent and helpless; I'm not. Putting

  me half under a bush, awash in my own blood, has been tried before any

  number of times. It didn't work then, and it's not guaranteed to work

  now. If you don't believe that, I'll be glad to prove it by tossing you

  into the fireplace. Just say the word."

  "I think I can get along well enough without your kind offer," he

  answered, a faint smile just beginning to curve his lips. "I'm not that

  easy to toss into a fireplace, but I'm willing to stipulate the fact

  that you're competent. The only question is, are you competent enough

  to overcome the handicap you have? Will you be able to handle it no

  matter what the situation?"

  "Well, I can think of one situation when I may not be able to handle

  it," I said, deciding to try some calculated misdirection. "I'm glad

  you didn't try beating me with that belt; I don't know if I could have

  kept control of myself."

  "You think you would have lost control to Bellna?" he asked with a

  frown. "Because of a beating? What makes you think she would have

  dominated you at a time like that?"

  "I'm not talking about her dominating me," I said, shaking my head as I

  lay back down and stretched out. "In fact, it has nothing to do with

  Bellna. I'm the one with an aversion to being beaten, and I've been

  known to be somewhat-harsh with people who try it. I had a run-in with

  a heavy whip once, and the passage of time hasn't done much to make me

  forget it."

  "Harsh," he echoed, a strange expression on his face as he looked down

  at me. "Your eyes turn soulless when you say that. I've never had a

  heavy whip used on me, but I can imagine what it must be like. Tell me

  what was done to you."

  "It's impossible to imagine what it's like without experiencing it," I

  said, unable to keep the harshness out of my tone even though I looked

  away from him. "As far as the rest of it goes, I'd rather not discuss

  it."

  "You're trembling," he said, his hand suddenly on my arm. "Of course we

  don't have to discuss it if you don't want to. Are you all right?"

  I turned my head back to him and nodded without speaking. I always

  trembled when I thought about that one -particular incident, and not

  just from anger. Anyone who thinks they would react differently and

  more bravely is invited to try it for themselves.

  "You shouldn't have much to worry about on that score at least," Grigon

  said, moving his other hand to stroke my hair. "Most men on this world

  would rather bed a female than beat her, especially one who looks like

  Bellna. Your peasant girl role was good enough to mollify anyone who

  wasn't actively bent on harming Bellna; if you run into the other kind,

  you're free to defend yourself. If you were able to keep me from seeing

  such deep-seated emotions when you brought my belt, you should be able

  to retain control at other times. I feel considerably better about this

  now."

  "I'm glad to hear that," I said, producing a smile to match the one he

  was wearing. "With that in mind, I think I ought to get some sleep now.

  Tomorrow will be a busy day."

  "Uh, yes, tomorrow," he agreed, suddenly looking more reluctant than

  friendly or approving. "I suppose you will need your rest. Are you sure

  there isn't anything else you need-that I could help you with?"

  "Don't tell me you're asking," I said with brows high, raising' up on one elbow toward him. "What happened to the demands and orders?"

  "They go with the other characters," he said, showing a grin. "In my

  own persona, I don't indulge in rape unless I have to. And that 'have

  to' refers to professional necessity, not last-ditch desperation. If

  you tell me to walk away, it won't be the first time I've done it."

  "Then I don't have to feel guilty about making you do it again," I

  said, lying back down. "Good night."

  "That value judgment is open to debate," he sighed, taking his hands

  away from me. "Merely expressed as a wish to be granted, however, I

  offer the same back to you. Sleep well."

  I waited until he had gotten off the bed and had started for his

  clothes before calling him back. I'd been curious to see if he really

  meant what he'd said about leaving, and at that point there was no

  doubt. Although rape tends to turn me stubborn, free agreement on all

  sides is another matter entirely -and his abruptly terminated

  performance earlier had gotten me curious about how he would do under

  other circumstances. He came back to the bed with a soft laugh, took me

  in his arms, then proceeded to make my struggle with Bellna less of a

  struggle. My invisible guest was losing both her fear and her

  reluctance, but her over enthusiasm was something left to be worked on.

  I had a very pleasant time - but Bellna loved it.

  Chapter 4

  I awoke when the automatic sensing system I've developed over the years

  told me I was no longer alone in the room. I could hear soft, whispered

  conversation, and could see the sudden glow of a just-lit candle

  through my slitted eyes. Whoever the intruders were, they certainly

  weren't trying to sneak up on me; a second candle cut the dimness, and

  another whisper joined the others. The last whisper overrode the first

  two sharply, and there was a brief period of silence during which I

  could see three long-skirted figures moving across the carpeting in

  front of the fireplace. A fourth skirted form passed behind the first

  three to the hearth, set wood in it, then worked briefly to get a fire

  going. While this was being accomplished the first three opened a large

  box, pawed through its hidden contents, then began arguing in very low

  tones. All four of the intruders were female, and Bellna's thoughts

  indicated they were servants. I hadn't been told to expect any

  servants, but then I hadn't been told much of anything. They seemed to

  be trying very hard not to wake me up, and the chill in the room's air

  did well to convince me that staying where I was was probably my best

  course of action. I yawned silently, snuggled down farther under the

  covers, and continued with my best course of action.

  I wasn't sleepy enough to fall asleep again, but the comfort of the

  warmed silk cradling my body set my mind to drifting. It was highly

  unlikely that the four women were anything other than the servants

  Bellna thought them, and that meant my last-ditch effort with Grigon

  the night before hadn't worn off the way I'd been afraid it might. He'd

  been very attentive and considerate while making love to me, but most

  mature men have no trouble separating bed time from thinking time. If

  he hadn't down checked me for the project, it meant that he really had

  been convinced by the story I'd told him. Not that the story wasn't

  true. There are an uncounted number of times when truth will do more

  for you than lying; the catch is in knowing when one of those times has

  come by.

  I felt a contented p
urr in my mind, and realized that Bellna was also

  thinking about Grigon. He was talented enough to satisfy almost any woman, but especially one with Bellna's limited experience. She'd lost

  control almost from the first moment he'd entered me, but I'd been able

  to ignore her until Grigon began trotting out various facets of his

  talent. There are certain things no woman alive can ignore, especially

  if she starts out aroused. Grigon had the advantage over me the second

  time, and he wasn't shy about pushing for all he was worth. I'd felt my

  control slipping, fought to regain it, then realized that I couldn't

  fight. My awareness was sliding into Bellna's, the two of them running

  together, the resulting consciousness completely bound to the man who

  was laughing softly as he watched me. Grigon obviously knew total

  surrender when he saw it; the rest of our time together had been filled

  with pleasure, but I'd had no say in any part of it. I'd felt nothing

  but satisfaction at the time, but looking back on it was somewhat

  embarrassing, just as Bellna's girlish memories were. My feeling the

  way she did had caused the bonding between us, but was that any better

  than having her assume control? The resulting personality didn't do

  things the way I did; it might be best if I tried to avoid-"Forgive me,

  Highness, yet I must awaken you," a soft voice interrupted my thoughts,

  coming from right beside the bed. I opened my eyes to see a young girl,

  her hands held nervously before her, no more of her expression visible

  than the tremor in her voice. I was basing my guess as to her age on

  the sound of her voice, but when she stepped back and turned enough so

  that the candlelight touched most of her face, I saw I was right.

  "Inform the Princess that her coach and escort have already arrived," a

  stage-whisper came from one of the other three. "We must hasten if we

  are not to anger the captain."

  "You need have fear of angering none save me," I interrupted with

  Bellna-huffiness, sitting up while making sure I held the covers

  modestly over myself. "Who is this captain you speak of, and how dare

  he make demands of me?"

  "Captain Fallan is the leader of your mercenary escort, Highness," the

  quavering answer came, this time directly from the girl who had

  whispered before. She stood with the other two not far from the

  fireplace, and all four of them looked nervous and uncomfortable.

  "Though he uttered no words of demand, we were instructed to ready you

  as quickly as possible. It would be foolish to ignore such

  instructions, for mercenaries are known to have little patience, most

  especially captains of mercenaries.

  The girl stopped to breathe after getting all that out in a rush, the

  other three nodding their heads in agreement. All four of them were

  young, no more than sixteen at the most, and all of them were clearly

  peasants. They wore long print skirts made from some cheap material,

  low cut blouses that had once been white, had solid-colored shawls tied

  around their hips out of the way, and were barefoot. Bellna didn't know

  any of them, and couldn't understand why they were there. The female

  servants who usually looked after her were trained ladies' maids,

  efficient, genteel and quietly obedient.

  "We were brought here by Captain Fallan for the express purpose of

  assisting you to readiness," the girl next to the bed said, drawing my

  eyes back to her. "We had best do so immediately."

  "Had we really," I murmured, letting Bellna's annoyance touch me. "Have

  you ever before been privileged to serve a Princess?" They all shook

  their heads, looking confused, and I nodded. "I thought not. You have

  much to learn before you will be acceptable. Bring me a wrap."

  None of the four was terribly pleased with my attitude, and I could see

  they were having difficulty remembering and accepting my higher social

  position. If I'd been older than they it would have been easier all around, but I wasn't older and I may even have been younger. One of the

  two who hadn't spoken yet, a pretty redhead with a good figure, went to

  the large box I'd seen them open earlier and pulled out a long, tiearound

  dress. The tie-around was the wrap I'd asked for, and when she

  brought it to the bed I threw the covers aside, stood up, and let her

  put it around me.

  "You may bring beverages and foods to break my fast," I informed them

  haughtily as I tied the tie-around. "When I have finished my repast,

  you may then dress me."

  The two who had done all the talking so far began sputtering as a

  prelude to arguing, but I wasn't listening to anything I didn't want to

  hear. I moved between the heavy curtain and the bed, found the lighter

  arrangement Grigon had used the night before, lit the candle, then went

  back to jerk the drapes closed in the faces of my new servants. They

  were half outraged and half frightened, but I didn't think they'd make

  the mistake of outright disobedience. They may not have liked it, but I

  war a princess.

  I spent some time behind the curtain making use of the room's chamber

  pot in private, then went out to find that two of the four girls, the

  two talkative ones, were gone. The other two glanced at me

  uncomfortably, but kept quiet as I went to the chair in front of the

  fire and sat down. Their disapproval was as loud as shouting, but as

  long as they didn't say anything out loud Bellna was satisfied, which

  meant that L was satisfied. I was more eager to get going than to stop

  for a meal, but letting myself be rushed wouldn't have been in

  character. Bellna was used to doing things her way, so obnoxious was

  the way I would have to play it.

  It didn't take long for the two girls to get back, and they didn't look

  happy. One of them carried a tray and the other opened the door for

  her, and the two of them hurried over to where I was sitting.

  "Captain Fallan sends his compliments, Princess," the second one said

  while the first, the one who had been nearest the bed, put the tray

  across the arms of the chair I sat in. "He wishes you a hearty repast,

  yet asks that you partake of it as quickly as possible. Dawn approaches

  swiftly, and it is best that we be on our way before then."

  "He swore when he heard you had not yet dressed," the girl who had

  carried the tray blurted, her face pale in the candlelight. She had

  brown hair, just as the second girl did, but looked fractionally

  younger. "Had it been I he swore at, I would not have been able to

  cease trembling. His anger grows as his patience thins."

  "And yet the word he sent was most courteous," I pointed out, lifting

  the thick wedge of bread smeared with what looked like butter. "He may

  swear as he wishes in the presence of peasants, yet would my father

  have his tongue out were he to do the same before me. He will wait as

  long as necessary, for it is in my service that he moves. Was the lord

  Grigon as displeased as he?"

  "The lord spoke no word in our presence, yet did he seem touched by

  annoyance," the girl answered, glancing at her friends. They weren't

  used to seeing a female get away with mu
rder when dealing with men, and

  they weren't sure whether or not they liked it.

  "The lord Grigon will also survive," I said with a sniff, then tackled

  the fried meat and boiled oats on my plate. The meal was a quick,

  slapped-together affair that Bellna didn't care for, but rather than

  refuse to touch it, I simply showed distaste while slowly shoveling it

  in. I did have to get the show on the road, and could intelligently

  delay things only so long. The four girls stood around watching me, the

  oddest expressions on their faces, their annoyance growing when they realized I was ignoring them just as much as I was ignoring the men.

  Even the slowest meal has to come to an end, and the girls were all

  ready for me when I indicated that the wooden tray could be taken. I'd

  spent a small amount of time privately admiring the intricately carved

  bone that was used in place of wood or metal plates, and could finally

  understand Dameron's reference to collectors. The bone plate would have

  fit well into my own collection of rare and beautiful things, but there

  was no way for me to get it out of there. The only practical solution

  would be to come back for it once all the excitement was over, but that

  time was a long way off. I had to live through everything in between

  first, and that might turn out to be easier said than done.

  Once the tray was taken, I had to let myself be dressed. I would have

  preferred doing it alone, without help, but that would have been out of

  character. The underwear I had managed to avoid in the base was the

  first thing produced, to Bellna's satisfaction and the girls'

  amusement. The bottom part fit tight down to below my knees, was drawn

  closed at my waist, and was made up of frilly layers of lace. The top

  part was a short-sleeved, waist4ong jacket with lacings in front, made

  of silk without frilly layers, as confining as a straitjacket with the

  lacings closed. Raising my arms so that the under-dress could be put on

  me wasn't the easy gesture it should have been, setting me to wonder

  how I was supposed to fight in that rig. A light blue dress had been

  supplied to take the place of the dark blue one Grigon had torn, and

  then I was urged into the chair so that my boots could be put on and

  laced. My underwear came to just about the top of the boots, and with

  the long sleeved, high-collared dress, I was covered all over. Bellna