Runaways

by Carolyn McCrae

  “Ted it’s about Linda.”

  “What about Linda?”

  “She’s just called from India. I think she’ll need your advice.”

  I gave him a brief explanation of what had happened in the past two weeks.

  “You’re right she will need some advice, and support. I can’t believe it of Ramesh, he seemed such a nice young man.”

  “Well he’s turned out a total shit. It was obviously his family that made him do it, but he didn’t have to go along with it. Does it have to stand? Is it legal in this country?”

  “I can’t say it’s something I’ve come across before but I will make some enquiries. When does she get back?”

  “She said she would be in the office on Monday.”

  “Would she see me then do you think, if I came down?”

  “I’m sure she would. Come down on Sunday and stay with us.” Ted must have known I was staying with Maureen, they were frequently in touch and it seemed a reasonable assumption to make.

  “Do you think I could? I’ll call Maureen and if she agrees I’ll see you on Sunday.”

  Linda had always closed the office early on a Friday, and all the staff loved having longer weekends, they told me that just two hours on a Friday afternoon meant that they could ‘get ahead with things’ and therefore enjoy Saturday and Sunday more. Driving home on the pre-rush hour roads I thought how lucky I was not to have to wheel a trolley round a supermarket buying plastic meat in polystyrene trays wrapped in cellophane. Maureen and I took it in turns on a Saturday morning to walk up and down the small village high street buying meat in a butcher’s, vegetables in a greengrocers, bread in the bakers, tea, flour, spices in a grocers shop and cleaning materials in the ironmongery. I wondered for how long that would be possible, already there were signs that the local shops were losing business to the big supermarket that had opened in the town.

  Maureen and I were enjoying an early evening drink. “I am so looking forward to seeing Ted. I was trying to remember when we last met. It would have been at your mother’s funeral, or was it Charles’s wedding I can’t remember if he was there or not. Still, it will be nice to see him and catch up.”

  “You like him very much, don’t you?” Maureen was easier to talk to than she had been for months.

  “I’ve known him for a very long time.” Again Maureen succeeded in not directly answering a straight question.

  “He was always very good to you and to your brother Charles, and to the children. There isn’t a member of your family that doesn’t owe a lot of their happiness to Ted.”

  “Yet I never thought of him as happy, but how does an unhappy person do so much to improve other people’s lives?”

  “He’s not so much unhappy as lonely, I think, but he gets a great deal of satisfaction from his work. He’s done very well over the years, Max couldn’t do without him. He set out with nothing and I think he believes that was an advantage, all the people he knew who were born into money needed his help. He believes that he has been the privileged one, having the satisfaction of knowing that everything he has he has earned, he owes nothing to anyone.”

  “He had Max’s help.”

  “Ah. Max.”

  “You don’t like him do you?”

  “No.”

  “You know about his history? Where he came from. And why?”

  “I know the story he tells, the public Max. You know I would have told you if I had known anything to help your search.”

  She obviously didn’t know how much David had told me. But why would she lie?

  She ended the conversation. “Another drink?”

  When she came back from the bar and placed glasses on the table she changed the subject. “Now for the weekend. Let’s get it all sorted. First the shopping.”

  I was looking forward to seeing Ted so much. It wasn’t just because he was going to help Linda, it certainly wasn’t that he would bring information about the children. I supposed it was because he was something solid and unchanging in my life. He had genuinely wanted me to be happy with Carl, and, unlike Charles, he hadn’t been cynical or pessimistic about our chances, at least if he had been he hadn’t shown it.

  I don’t know what I was expecting. I always remembered Ted in a comfortable checked shirt, usually worn with a paisley cravat, and grey trousers and that is how I always thought of him, so I was a little shocked to see him in denims with a red and white striped shirt and navy blue sweater.

  “Ted!” I gave him a rather self-conscious hug.

  Was it me getting older or Ted’s new image, but I saw Ted through completely new eyes.

  He looked very nice, almost attractive.

  This was 1983. I was 36 years old. Ted was in his 60s. There was nearly 30 years between us. He had been like a father to me, cheering me up when I was depressed, giving me somewhere to live when I had nowhere, finding solutions to most of the problems in my life.

  “What’s with this new image?”

  “Hello you too.” He hugged me back and kept an arm draped over my shoulder as we walked down the path and into the house. “And I forgive you for never answering any of the questions I asked in my letters. I realise how difficult it must have been for you.” Ted had always been on my side, giving me the benefit of any doubt about my behaviour.

  Maureen had been looking forward to Ted’s visit as much as I had but I was surprised to see a fleeting look of distaste when Ted and I walked into the house together.

  “Hello Maureen, it’s good to see you again.” I saw her relax and smile as he put his hands on her shoulders and kissed her cheek.

  We sat down around the fire where the logs were glowing red, giving out not just a feeling of warmth but of welcome and we went through all the pleasantries about his journey, what the roads were like, how much easier it will be when they get all the M25 open; and the weather, how cold it was after such a mild January, how lucky it was that the snow we’d had earlier in the month had cleared.

  “But you didn’t bring me all the way down here just to talk about the weather did you?” He asked, and as he turned towards me I noticed the reason for the difference in his appearance.

  “You’ve grown your hair.”

  “So I have!” he twiddled some of his grey hair around his fingers “Josie said I should change my image, whatever that means. Just before Christmas she made me go shopping with her and she took me into establishments I would never have dreamed of entering. She said if I fitted into the clothes then I should wear them. I suppose spending a lot of time with the youngsters made me realise how old I was becoming.”

  “You spend a lot of time with them?”

  “Certainly, and they are great fun. Even young Bill gets us all laughing. You’ve missed such a lot Susannah, you really have.” Before I could interrupt to justify myself he continued “But I respect your decision. If you weren’t meant to be a mother then there’s no point in forcing it. That’s what Josie says anyway and I am absolutely certain she means it.”

  “What about Charles? Isn’t he around?” I realised that I had no idea what arrangements had been put in place for my children.

  “Holly hasn’t come back even though she is in England. I believe she has other irons in the fire. Charles is devastated by the break-up and it’s likely they will be divorced soon. Since she left there has been all sorts of gossip which has been very hurtful. You know he and Holly worked with Linda for a while, before she bought them out and moved south, well there were rumours that Holly got a little too close to Linda’s husband.”

  “Ted. I’m ashamed of you passing on idle gossip.” Maureen did seem genuinely shocked.

  I had little doubt that Holly would have had an affair with Ramesh, she was a tart who would sleep with anyone, but my immediate fear was at how close Ramesh Kambli seemed to have got to the family. I could only guess at his motives.

  For the first time I thought that, perhaps, David had been right and I should have been more on my guard.

  �
�I should hate to see them divorce,” Ted continued “but unfortunately these days no relationship seems to be taken as seriously as it should.” Realising he was straying onto tricky ground he changed tack. “Do you want to hear about your children Susannah? If not I won’t say anything other than to say they are doing fine. All of them, even young Bill.”

  “You see Bill?”

  “Charles and I take it in turns to drive down to the hospital. Sometimes Al and Jack come, sometimes they don’t but Josie always does so, yes, I spend a lot of time with them every weekend. And then we meet up during the week. Josie has decided to study Law and has been picking my brains. You know that despite all the disruptions in her education she takes her A-levels next summer. She’ll do well that one.”

  I thought of saying ‘despite having Joe for a father and me for a mother’ but thought better of it.

  “I’ve been helping Al and Jack as well. They find school work more difficult and need nudging even to turn up at school every day, but I have my spies and know pretty much what they are up to. They got into a bit of trouble, in with a bad crowd, when they first came back up north but it didn’t take long to show them the error of their ways.”

  I realised how little I knew about my family.

  “Am I odd that I don’t care? Is it unnatural?”

  Ted looked thoughtful for a few moments, as if trying to decide whether to say anything in front of Maureen, but obviously decided that there was no reason not to be honest.

  “My dear Susannah, or Annie I believe I should be calling you, I am probably one of the very few people who understand how you feel about your children. Remember I knew Joe and I know the circumstances under which these poor young things came into the world. Maureen, don’t look so shocked. I know that Susannah conceived Josie at a time when she was desperately unhappy. Joe wanted to marry into the rich Donaldson family, Susannah was used. Once he had achieved the respectability and opportunity of working for me, he abused any love Susannah may have had for him. You must remember that, just as Alicia was reminded of the circumstances of Susannah’s conception every time she saw her daughter, so Annie is reminded of that awful period of her life every time she looks at her children. She has never had any reason to love them. Annie, I completely understand.” He reached over and took my hand, squeezing it with affection. I would have cried if I hadn’t noticed the look of distaste in Maureen’s eyes.

  “Does Josie know this?” I asked, worrying possibly for the first time what my daughter thought of me.

  “I have told her what she needs to know. She may also be more wary about men than many of her generation.”

  “You seem to get on well together.”

  “She is a very nice young lady, tending to be a bit bossy like her mother and grandmother but, just like them, an absolute charmer.”

  His affection for our family was tangible and I noticed a look of censure cross Maureen’s face.

  “Despite everything Charles needs some help.” Ted surprised me. It all sounded as though they were getting on fine and I said so.

  “He needs some time to himself. He didn’t realise what he was doing when he took the children on. Monika’s getting on and has been less able to be helpful, so we found him a young Norwegian girl to help with the children but it didn’t work out. There’s been a succession of au pairs but no one at all satisfactory. He’s holding together, that’s all.”

  When Charles and I had been children it had been a succession of nannies, now it was au pairs, but I didn’t fail to notice the parallel.

  “And Holly knows all this but still hasn’t come back.”

  “No. I believe as soon as the divorce is finalised she will be marrying again.”

  “Not another sucker?”

  “However much I tend to agree with you, it is not for me to say.” I didn’t notice how pointedly he changed the subject. “Actually, a plan was rather forming in my mind as I drove down this morning. I didn’t have much time on Friday to look into Linda’s problems but I did do a little searching. Let me ask you some questions about her. Do you mind?”

  I was more than happy to abandon the subject of my brother and my children.

  “I just need to get an idea of her life. I did go to see Linda’s parents yesterday to see if, by any chance Linda had confided in them but I’d like another view of things.”

  “I’ve only known her a few weeks. She called out of the blue to get some help with the business while she was away.”

  “Didn’t that seem odd when you hardly knew each other. You would hardly have been her first choice.”

  “No, fifth I think, at least, she admitted as much.”

  “She didn’t tell you why the others she had asked had said no, why there was no one in the office already who could take over?”

  “No, now you come to mention it she didn’t.”

  “Were you busy while she was away?”

  “You mean the office? Not particularly, there were things to do most days but the phone didn’t ring very often. It all seemed pretty regular stuff.”

  “What about bills?”

  “How do you mean?”

  “Were there many? What sort of bills were there? Did you get any people ringing up asking for money?”

  I began to realise what he was getting at. “Do you mean were there any signs she was in trouble? I don’t think so. There were lots of bills but I assumed that was because it was a business.” I had noticed that most of the post was made up of demands for payment but there had been cheques to bank as well. “Money came in as well. And before you ask, I didn’t see any bank statements and if any had come in I wouldn’t have opened them.” I noticed Maureen’s disbelieving look. Anyway, she’s lent me a car. She can’t be in trouble if she’s got a car to give away.”

  “She recently had to sack her office manager. I suppose the Metro was hers.”

  “Why did she have to get rid of her? Who was it? No one said anything about anyone leaving.”

  Ted’s questions began to make other, small, things fall into place. Linda had said she had had to borrow a lot of money to buy Charles out of the business. Even I knew interest rates were high and likely to get higher. And it seemed obvious, now, that she had brought someone in from the outside to keep an eye on the office because she didn’t trust the people there not to snoop around the books while she was away.

  “The business is in trouble isn’t it?”

  “I don’t know. I’m not just being discreet. I won’t know until I’ve spoken to her tomorrow. I’ll be able to see then if my plan is a sensible one. Now let’s enjoy the evening, can I take you both out to dinner somewhere?”

  As we were washing up the breakfast things together the next morning comfortably chatting about nothing Ted suggested we drive separately to Sevenoaks. I was rather disappointed as I had been looking forward to an hour or so with him. But he was adamant. Linda would need some time in the office to catch up on what she had missed while she was away; she might not know he was coming, she might not have spoken to her parents. I would have to arrive first and explain to her. He would follow on an hour or so later.

  It was only as I drove carefully down the icy ramp onto the M25 at the top of Reigate Hill that I realised it probably meant he was expecting that I would have to leave the Metro there and he would drive me home.

  When I arrived the lights were on and Linda was already in the office, working her way through the carefully labelled piles of paper. It was only because of what Ted had said the day before that I realised how large the bills pile was.

  “Coffee?”

  She nodded.

  When I brought the mugs into her office and sat down she looked up and I realised she had been crying.

  “Problems?”

  Again she nodded. “I probably should have said something before I left but I couldn’t think of anything until I had got it sorted. With Ram I mean. But it only gets worse.”

  “You can’t do all this on your own.” I wasn�
�t sure what I meant by ‘all this’. “It’s an awful lot to deal with, you’re tired out from your trip, angry and hurt by what Ram has done and now you’re faced with what must seem like a brick wall of problems.” I paused, but since she said nothing, I continued. “When we spoke on Friday I was worried about you, I don’t know you well enough to know how you would cope but you sounded very upset, frightened and in need of support. So I rang Ted.”

  She looked up and it was difficult to read the emotions on her face.

  “Ted?”

  “Well he’s a solicitor, he might be able to understand your options better than anyone else we know.”

  “Probably.”

  “Anyway he’ll be here in a few minutes.”

  “Here?”

  “Yes, he stayed with me and Maureen last night. He drove down yesterday. He wants to help.”

  I wasn’t prepared for her bursting into tears, folding her arms on the desk in front of her, bending her head onto them and sobbing uncontrollably.

  I was never any good with emotions and so I got up and closed the door to her office behind me.

  “Is Linda OK?” Asked Debbie, one of the girls I had been sharing an office with for the past fortnight, but who seemed to like me as little as I liked her.

  “She’s tired after her trip. Where’s Ivy?”

  “She’s not in today. There isn’t any work anyway.”

  “Is there nothing that needs finishing?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Then you’d better have the day off too.”

  “But I came in. I want paying for half a day, I can’t do anything else now. I should get a day’s money. That’s what would be fair.”

  “All right then. I’ll make sure you get paid for the full day but you’d better catch up by doing double the normal amount of work tomorrow.”

  “I always work hard.” She sounded so defensive I knew she was lying.

  I answered her silently ‘probably not, your gravy train is coming to an end’ as she put on her coat and left the office as quickly as she possibly could.

  The office seemed remarkably quiet and empty for 9 o’clock on a Monday morning. It hadn’t occurred to me during my two weeks in that office that it should have been bustling with activity if it were to make a living for all the people employed, and for Linda.