Impulse

by Vanessa Garden

After a few seconds’ hesitation, I sat on the bed. It creaked and groaned beneath me.

  My pulse quickened. I was in bed with Marko, with only a flimsy nighty and…I stared at Marko’s bare chest…nothing much else, between us.

  ‘I haven’t been able to sleep much, either.’

  Marko swallowed thickly.

  ‘Are you happy to have returned to Marin, Miranda?’

  I chewed on my bottom lip and twisted a handful of satiny black sheet into a ball.

  ‘I am happy. But I still think something’s wrong here. I saw Anne this morning. She looks terrible, all skinny and sickly and pale.’

  ‘Everybody is pale, here,’ he said, his blue eyes soft and dilated in the dimness of the room.

  ‘But have you seen her lately? I mean, really looked at her?’

  He leaned against the bedhead and sighed. ‘Not for a couple of weeks. But when I last saw her, I asked how she was faring in the dungeons and she smiled and said she was happy; the happiest she’s ever been. She even went as far as to say she didn’t want to be moved. She wanted to work with the prisoners.’

  I shook my head and gathered up another fistful of Marko’s sheets.

  ‘But something’s not right. She used to be a little bit shy, but now she’s like a frightened animal. And she’s not happy—not in the true sense.’ I met Marko’s eyes. ‘I can tell.’

  He stared at me for a long moment.

  ‘If it would make you happy, I can make some enquiries. But I can’t force her away from the dungeons. I’m not that sort of king, Miranda. She has her free will.’ When he said ‘free will’ he gave me a pointed look.

  ‘Thanks,’ I said, before sliding off the bed and heading for the door. ‘And please let me know what you find out.’

  ‘I will,’ he said, before he added, in a gravelly voice, ‘wait. Don’t leave yet. I need to ask you something.’

  My fingers trembled as they gripped the doorknob. For some reason, I couldn’t turn around and face him. I knew what he was going to ask me and suddenly I wasn’t ready to answer it.

  ‘Did you return to Marin for any other reason besides making sure we’re all safe from my brother’s evil clutches? Any other reason at all, Miranda? I need to know.’

  ‘There is one other reason,’ I whispered. ‘And it’s the most important one.’

  I could hear Marko’s laboured breathing behind me, and it sent my heart banging against my ribcage.

  You, I wanted to say, but instead I scurried from the room and shut the door behind me, like some frightened little mouse.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  WHEN I ENTERED Lauren’s room around lunchtime the following day, she was sitting up in bed, clutching a bucket and looking green.

  ‘What happened? Are you okay?’

  She grinned, but it quickly turned into a grimace. ‘Remind me to stay away from the wine here.’

  I shook my head. She was unbelievable.

  ‘Don’t expect me to be your babysitter while you’re here. I’ve got a ton of other things to worry about.’

  She rested the bucket on the ground and sank beneath the covers. ‘You act like I’m only here for a short stay.’

  I paced the room, filled with an anxious energy I hadn’t been able to shake off since I’d left Marko’s room last night.

  ‘What, so you plan on staying here forever?’ I asked. ‘Surely you’ll miss your friends and your job.’

  She sighed and twirled a lock of hair around her finger.

  ‘I don’t know. It is fun here, that’s for sure, and there are loads of cute guys,’ she paused and sighed again, ‘but the most interesting one is hooked on you.’

  I rolled my eyes at her, but secretly loved what she’d just said.

  ‘So, I don’t know. I’ll have to see what happens, maybe after a few more months.’ Resting her head against her pillow and stretching her arms out wide, she added, ‘You’re right in saying that you leave your problems behind down here. It feels great to wake up and not have to worry about anything.’

  I stopped pacing and took a good look at Lauren. She looked anything but relaxed. There were dark circles under her eyes—possibly a result of the hangover. And she looked seriously off-colour now, when last night she’d looked radiant. Normally Lauren looked good, even after a huge bender of a weekend. Maybe the lack of sunlight was getting to her complexion.

  ‘What about you?’ she asked. ‘Are you going to stay forever?’

  Her mattress creaked beneath me as I sat down and wrapped an arm around the wooden bedpost, the intricate carvings of mermaids and mermen digging into my skin.

  ‘I’m not really sure.’ The mixed messages Marko had been sending had me confused.

  ‘Do you think you’ll marry Marko?’ Lauren suddenly blurted.

  ‘I didn’t come back to get married. And anyway, last year’s engagement was all fake.’ A stupid blush crept up my neck and into my cheeks.

  ‘Oh, I’m sure there’ll be a real engagement soon. Marko’s spent nearly every day visiting me to quiz me on you.’

  ‘What kind of questions?’

  ‘Question questions; you know, your favourite food, who your friends are, what you like and dislike…’ her voice trailed off. ‘Don’t worry, he didn’t ask me about your cycle or anything like that. I think with Damir locked away you don’t have to worry about Marko wanting to have sex with you anymore,’ she grinned wickedly, ‘other than for pleasure, that is.’

  A smile tickled the corners of my mouth, but then I remembered something else she’d said.

  ‘He’s been in your room every day since we arrived?’

  She stared at me for a few seconds, her eyes travelling down to my hands, which I’d balled into fists, before nodding. ‘Just to check if I was healthy. He had this doctor come in and look me over.’

  ‘Robbie?’

  ‘Duh. No. Some ugly lady.’ She grinned wickedly. ‘By the way, I really want to meet Robbie today.’

  Within seconds she was out of bed and fishing for clothes in her wardrobe. Lauren was long, lithe, lettuce-eating-model thin, but somehow the top she put on made her boobs look like they were spilling out.

  I shook my head. Trust Lauren to plan a seduction on Robbie. The joke was on her, though: unless he reached out and felt her cleavage, he wouldn’t know it existed.

  ‘Okay. Let’s go.’ I sighed, resigning myself to the fact that even my visits with Robbie were no longer private. I’d have to share him with Lauren, too. I guessed that I’d have to get used to it.

  Lauren groaned and clutched at her stomach.

  ‘Bloody wine,’ she said, eyeing me warily and, weirdly, blushing. ‘I think I’ll have to lay off the booze for a while.’

  ‘Yeah, right,’ I said, rolling my eyes. We left the room and started down the long, stony corridor. I had to admit it was kind of nice having my sister with me when I ventured out into the city. We could plan picnics out in the countryside and trawl the markets together. And it would be nice to have somebody back me up on the whole ‘Sylvia is evil’ argument.

  ‘Have you met Sylvia yet?’

  ‘Yeah, a few times, actually.’

  I nodded and tried to show no reaction.

  ‘And what do you think?’ Lauren knew all about my time here last year—I’d told her everything. And she knew I was worried about what Sylvia could do to Marko.

  Lauren chewed on her bottom lip before answering. ‘Don’t hate me, but…’ She had a half-fearful, half-excited expression on her face before she smiled.

  ‘But, what?’

  ‘I kind of like her.’ Lauren squeezed my hand with her cold one. ‘She’s actually alright. And gorgeous. If I was a lesbian I’d so be into her.’

  We stopped, in the middle of the corridor, me leaning against the wall, trying to control my shock, and Lauren, staring at me quizzically, like I’d grown an extra nose.

  ‘What’s the matter?’

  ‘Are you serious? Sylvia is the Sylvia I’ve told you about.�
� I felt like tearing chunks of hair out of my head and clawing off my own face to emphasise the point.

  Lauren snorted. ‘Don’t be stupid. She can’t be that bad. I’ve had dinner in her room twice.’

  After making sure the trailing guard was a decent distance behind us still, I stepped closer to Lauren. ‘Don’t go there again, promise me,’ I whispered. ‘She’s dangerous. God, I can’t believe you went there, alone, even after all the stuff I told you.’

  Lauren stepped forward and thrust her face in mine. ‘Hey, don’t get all preachy on me; it was your precious Marko who told me how wonderful Sylvia was. So if you have a problem with my hanging out with her, you should take it up with your future husband.’

  ‘He’s not my future husband,’ I said, walking again.

  ‘Well, he thinks he is. Gosh that guy has it bad for you.’

  My stomach somersaulted and my legs went all wobbly.

  ‘Did he…did he actually say it?’

  ‘Pretty much.’ Lauren laughed and rubbed her hands together. ‘Righto, so Robbie’s fair game then?’

  ‘Robbie is not game, okay? He’s a human being.’

  We both greeted the guards at the main doors, but they looked straight over my head and grinned at Lauren, who high-fived them.

  ‘Everyone here is so cool,’ she said, gushing, as we descended the castle steps.

  ‘Yep. The coolest,’ I said, deadpan, but she was too busy smiling at a passing male guard to hear me.

  We travelled to Robbie’s in silence, finding him outside one of the glass greenhouses washing his hands in a bucket of water. Just before we approached him, I spoke up to warn Lauren that he wouldn’t be able to see us properly.

  ‘What? He’s blind? You never said that,’ she said out loud.

  ‘Shut up.’ I slapped her arm, lightly. ‘He’s half blind. It happened after I left. I only found out a couple of days ago.’

  ‘Miranda?’ Robbie called out, staring in my direction.

  ‘Oh my God, he is beautiful!’ Lauren dug her fingernails into my arm and made a squealing sound. I shrugged her off.

  ‘Hi, Robbie.’

  ‘I was hoping you’d come today,’ he said, before drying his hands on a blue towel and reaching out for me. I took his hand in mine.

  ‘Robbie, I’ve brought somebody to meet you.’

  He moved his head slightly to the left of me.

  ‘Here.’ I dragged Lauren forward and stuck out her hand and placed it on Robbie’s. ‘Meet my sister, Lauren.’

  Robbie’s brown eyes widened when he shook Lauren’s hand. ‘Lauren?’

  ‘Yes!’ Lauren gushed, ‘So great to finally meet you. Miranda went on and on about you for, like, a year.’

  I elbowed her in the ribs.

  ‘Ouch, Randy.’

  Robbie smiled and a light blush crept into his cheeks. Lauren, her hand still gripping Robbie’s, fanned herself and mimed the word ‘hot’ at me.

  After tugging his hand free, Robbie picked up his bucket of tools.

  ‘So, what can I do for you both?’

  Lauren reached out and linked her arm through Robbie’s. ‘Show me around, please. I just love gardening.’

  It wasn’t a lie. She hated housework; but if there was one domestic thing Lauren enjoyed doing it was gardening. She and Pop shared a vegetable patch at home. Perhaps meeting Robbie would be good for her. Hopefully some of his calmness would rub off on her and she might not party so hard at night, which she seemed to have dived right back into here in Marin.

  My guard watched Lauren and Robbie from the doorway of the largest greenhouse. They were giggling because a butterfly, looking suspiciously like George, kept flying at her face as if it was attacking her.

  After Robbie gave Lauren a tour of the greenhouses, the three of us had lunch in the city—baguettes stuffed with grilled vegetables and herbed fish fillets—and returned back to the castle that afternoon, both a little lighter on our feet. It had been so good to see Robbie so happy and animated in our company. He seemed to love having Lauren as an audience: while he was mostly serious around me, she seemed to bring out his fun side. I was getting to see another side of Robbie—and I liked it.

  ‘I’m stuffed. Might go have a nana nap,’ Lauren said at her door.

  I yawned. ‘Me too.’ The truth, though, was that I wasn’t tired in the slightest—I planned on speaking to Marko. The dreamy smile on her face stopped me for a moment.

  ‘So, what do you think of Robbie?’

  Lauren grinned. ‘He is so hot. He felt my face to feel my smile. It was so romantic.’

  ‘Just don’t hurt him. He doesn’t need to be hurt.’

  Lauren’s face turned dark. ‘Why do you always assume the worst in me?’ She folded her arms across her chest, emphasising her boobs. ‘You’re my sister. Shouldn’t you be boosting me up? Not bringing me down all the time?’

  ‘Sorry,’ I said, before adding, with a grin, ‘you’re a fantastic person. You have a great, generous heart. You’re kind, loving, and beautiful—’

  ‘Oh, shut up.’

  Marko’s room was empty. According to his guard, he was out for another hour or so, which gave me the perfect opportunity to do something I’d wanted to do since I first found out about the secret sci-fi wall. I was going to touch it. If it opened, then I knew I truly loved Marko, Marin’s true king. If not, then…well. I didn’t want to go there yet.

  It felt strange to be in Marko’s room without him. Scary somehow, like being in a lion’s den, with the lion out but likely to return home any minute. His scent filled the room, and when I passed his bed I had to resist the impulse to press my face into his pillows.

  I stood before the blank wall, nerves shaking my sweaty hands as I raised them. What if it did open? I’d have to tell Marko, so he’d know he could trust me absolutely, one hundred per cent. Then maybe he’d believe me when I told him of my concerns about Sylvia. Though I’d have to explain what I was doing in his room in the first place.

  Sucking in a deep breath through my nose, I thrust my palms against the cool stone and waited.

  Seconds passed. The wall remained cold beneath my touch.

  Disappointment fell from my heart to my stomach, like a ball of lead.

  But, just before I tore my hands away, the stone began to glow and heat my skin.

  I gasped and drew my hands away just as it shot up into the ceiling and left an open, musty passage.

  I took a second to breathe.

  Marko would have to trust me now, seeing as Marin, the city, did.

  Only five steps in, I felt a web stretch across my face. I flung my arms around crazily to make sure no spiders were on me, and then continued on.

  As I made my way down the narrow, dark corridor, I passed the walled room with the window and wondered briefly who had done those drawings. For some reason, I guessed it had been a female. There was a kind of sad, feminine energy emanating from the room.

  Continuing on, I paused at the narrow corridor leading to the dead-end where the blank wall supposedly led to the dungeons. Now that I had the city’s trust, would this wall open for me? I started towards it. Maybe I’d catch Sylvia visiting Damir.

  I pressed my palms against the stone and, within a few seconds, it warmed beneath my fingers and then shot up and opened to a small room. Across the room was a door with a golden key dangling above it on a hook. After three jumps I managed to unhook the key, and, without even stopping to think about Marko’s warning, unlocked the door.

  The corridor was wide and clean, with no cobwebs dangling, indicating it was an area that was regularly used. Nothing was familiar about it, though, so I proceeded with caution as I walked, pocketing the golden key in my jeans.

  Up ahead, around the bend, something rustled. Pressing my back against the wall, I cocked my head to listen, my breath trapped in my lungs.

  ‘Is someone there?’ a soft female voice called.

  ‘Anne?’ I whispered, coming away from the wall.


  She stepped hesitantly out into the hallway and, as I moved closer, I saw her pale face stained with tears. Her cheeks were tinted pink and her lips were swollen, as if she’d been kissing someone for about five hours. Her dress was red, glamorous and tight, showing her small cleavage. It looked like something Sylvia would have hanging in her wardrobe, and nothing like what Anne would normally wear.

  ‘Are you all right?’

  She nodded, but wouldn’t meet my eyes. ‘I’m fine. I’d better be on my way.’

  I gripped her thin arm. The feel of her jutting bones, sliding beneath her skin, made my stomach turn. ‘No. Wait. Where have you been just now?’

  She stared at me then with defiance, her bloodshot blue eyes unblinking.

  ‘The dungeons.’

  ‘You served the prisoners in that dress?’

  She continued to glare at me in a way that made me shuffle my feet.

  ‘So I’m just a serving girl who has no life at all? It would be impossible to imagine that I may have other reasons to visit the dungeons?’

  ‘Sorry. I just thought… I was worried. You’ve been crying.’

  ‘It’s none of your business, Miranda.’ When she said my name, her face softened and her chin trembled as though she was about to cry again.

  ‘You have a lover…a prisoner?’ I shivered. ‘You deserve better, much better.’

  ‘I can and I have done better. You shouldn’t think me so lowly. The man I’m in love with is wonderful. He’s been wronged, that’s all.’

  ‘What do you mean?’ I didn’t like where this was going. Goosebumps prickled my arms.

  ‘I’m not going to discuss my personal life with you, Miranda. You two-timed Robbie and Marko, so you can hardly talk,’ she said, before darting off down the corridor.

  ‘What the hell? I didn’t two-time anyone. I was kidnapped.’ I stared after her, unsure what to say next. ‘Just take care, please,’ I whispered in her wake, unsure if she’d heard.

  I waited until Anne was out of sight and snuck around the bend, looking for the way to the dungeons. It was easy. I just followed the voices, which led me to the top of a staircase.

  Wrapping my hands around the iron railing, I leant forward and listened. There were low voices, and the sounds of plates and glasses clinking, but it was all muted from that level.