Writing a Killer Thriller

by Jodie Renner

  What’s the basic recipe for a suspense hero or heroine that sells books? The ideal hero is clever, resourceful, charismatic, likeable, tenacious, and courageous – but not perfect. They may be an ordinary person whose life is suddenly thrown into turmoil and they’re forced to reach deep inside themselves to find courage and resources they never knew they had. Or the hero may be (and often is) a rebel who defies society’s rules, but he has inner integrity and a personal code of honor, and will risk his life for a worthy cause. Readers want to cheer him on to defeat evil, so they can get a sense of satisfaction that they, too, could stop the bad guys, help innocent victims, and restore harmony to their scary world.

  From my various reading of craft-of-fiction books and bestselling thrillers, and my own editing of thrillers and other suspense fiction, I’ve come up with this list of desired qualities for the hero or heroine of a page-turning suspenseful mystery, romantic suspense, or thriller novel.

  ATTRIBUTES OF A BESTSELLING HERO OR HEROINE:

  Heroes and heroines of bestselling thrillers need most of these character traits:

  ~ Clever. They need to be smart enough to figure out the clues and outsmart the villain. Readers don’t want to feel they’re smarter than the lead character. They don’t want to say, “Oh, come on! Figure it out, already!”

  ~ Resourceful. Think MacGyver, Katniss of The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, Indiana Jones, Jason Bourne, or Dr. Richard Kimble of The Fugitive. The hero needs to be able to use ingenuity and whatever’s at his disposal to get out of any jams he finds himself in and also to find and defeat the bad guy(s).

  ~ Experienced. They’ve done things and been places. They’ve had a variety of tough life experiences that have helped them grow. They’ve “lived” and are stronger and more resilient for it. They’re definitely not timid or naïve.

  ~ Determined. Your hero or heroine needs to be tenacious and resilient. They keep going. They don’t cave under pressure or adversity. They have a goal and stick to it, despite personal discomforts like fatigue, hunger, injuries, and threats.

  ~ Courageous. Bravery is essential, as readers want to look up to him/her. Any heroes who are tentative or fearful early on should soon find courage they didn’t know they had. The challenges and dangers they face force them to be stronger, creating growth and an interesting character arc.

  ~ Physically fit. Your heroine or hero should be up to the physical challenges facing her/him. It’s more believable if they jog or work out regularly, like Joe Pike running uphill carrying a 40-pound backpack. (Okay, maybe that’s an extreme example.) Don’t lose reader credibility by making your character perform feats you haven’t already built into their makeup, abilities you can’t justify by what we know about them so far.

  ~ Skilled. To defeat those clever, skilled villains, they almost always have some special skills and talents to draw on when the going gets rough. For example, Katniss in Hunger Games is a master archer and knows how to track and survive in the woods, Jack Reacher has his army police training, size, and intellect to draw on, and Joe Pike has multiple talents, including patience and stealth.

  ~ Charismatic. Attractive in some way. Fascinating, appealing, and enigmatic. Maybe even sexy. People are drawn to him or her, and readers will be, too.

  ~ Confident but not overly cocky. Stay away from arrogant, unless you’re going for unrealistic caricatures like James Bond.

  ~ Passionate, but not overly emotional. Often calm under fire, steadfast. Usually don’t break under pressure. Often intense about what they feel is right and wrong, but “the strong, silent type” is common among current popular thrillers – “a man of few words,” like Joe Pike or Jack Reacher or Harry Bosch.

  ~ Unique, unpredictable. They usually have a special worldview and a distinctive background and attitude that set them apart from others. They’ll often act in surprising ways, which keeps their adversaries off-balance and the readers on edge.

  ~ Complex. Imperfect, with some inner conflict. Guard against having a perfect or invincible hero or heroine. Make them human, with some self-doubt and fear, so readers worry more about the nasty villains defeating them and get more emotionally invested in their story.

  ~ Wounded. Had a tough background that toughened them up somewhat. But they’re still vulnerable because of it. Lucy Kincaid, from Allison Brennan’s romantic thriller series, was brutally attacked and nearly killed by a rapist, but she’s determined to overcome the emotional scars and become an FBI agent. Joe Pike was repeatedly beaten by an abusive father; Elvis Cole was abandoned by his mother; Jack Reacher was an army brat who was constantly in fights and lost his parents and brother. How these characters deal with their emotional and physical wounds touches the reader’s heart and draws us in.

  ~ Idealistic, Honorable, Self-sacrificing. The thriller hero or heroine may on occasion lie, cheat, steal, even kill, but they do it for the greater good, to stop threats and defeat evil. While never a pious goody-goody, the thriller hero is prepared to do whatever it takes to help innocent people who are threatened, protect an individual or family being terrorized, or rescue a child who’s been kidnapped. Having a sense of honor or being self-sacrificing is often what separates a flawed hero from a villain. For example, Rick in Casablanca is a cad-type antihero who ultimately sacrifices his own personal needs and desires for the greater good and turns into a hero at the end. Similarly with Walt Kowalski, the gruff, racist Clint Eastwood character in Gran Torino.

  ~ Often a loner or a rebel. Might even be an outlaw. Your hero works well – even best – alone, especially if an undercover agent or on a mission or assignment. Heroes often find themselves in situations where they can’t really depend on others – they need to solve the problems through their own resourcefulness, physical effort, and courage. As a result, and because of their inner makeup, heroes often make their own rules. Some examples of this are Robin Hood, Jesse James, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Jack Reacher, and Joe Pike.

  ~ Usually likeable. But not always. Exceptions are those really rough, gruff antiheroes who redeem themselves somehow at the end, like Rick in Casablanca, Harry Callahan in Dirty Harry, or Walt in Gran Torino.

  Also, it’s a good idea to give your hero or heroine:

  ~ An Achilles’ heel. A weakness or phobia. Maybe they’re afraid of heights or are claustrophobic. Maybe they’re afraid of snakes, like Indiana Jones. And Superman had to stay away from kryptonite. Give your hero a phobia or weakness, then of course put them in a scene where they’ll have to face their fears and overcome them!

  ~ A soft spot. Show a softer, more caring side to your tough hero now and then, to make him more human and appealing. Maybe he cares about the underdog, a minor character, an animal, or a child or baby.

  Now it’s up to you to build a background for your hero that will turn him or her into the kind of person who will possess most of these attributes. Good luck!

  Resources:

  James Scott Bell, Revision & Self-Editing

  James N Frey, How to Write a Damn Good Thriller

  Jodie’s reading of bestselling thrillers

  Jodie’s critical reading and editing of suspense fiction

  Back to TOC

  Chapter 6

  DEVISE A WORTHY ANTAGONIST

  You’ve outlined a plot and created an appealing, complex protagonist for your thriller or other crime/action fiction – great start! But what about your antagonist? According to James N. Frey, “the villain is your best friend, because the villain creates the plot behind the plot – the plot that has to be foiled by the hero.”

  Create a cunning, determined villain

  The hero or heroine of your suspense novel needs a worthy opponent who is at least as tough and clever as the protagonist – often more so. As James Scott Bell says, “Without a strong opponent, most novels lack that crucial emotional experience for the reader: worry. If it seems the hero can take care of his problems easily, why bother to read on?” The villain usually poses the initial threat that set
s off the whole plot, so make sure he’s complex, capable, well-motivated, and determined.

  And thrillers and other crime fiction need a downright nasty bad guy – but not a “mwoo-ha-ha” caricature or stereotype. If your villain is just a wicked cardboard caricature of what he could be, he’ll come off as an old-fashioned cliché, and your readers will quickly lose interest.

  To create a believable, complex, chilling villain, make him evil, clever and determined, but also someone who feels justified in his actions. Ask yourself what the bad guy wants and why, how he thinks the protagonist is standing in his way, and how he explains his own motivations to himself.

  How does your villain rationalize his actions? He may feel that he is justified because of early childhood abuse or neglect, a grudge against society, a goal thwarted by the protagonist, a desire for revenge against a perceived wrong, or a need for power or status – or money to fund his escape. Whatever his reasons, have them clear in your own mind, and at least hint at them in your novel. Like the protagonist, the antagonist needs clear motivations for his actions.

  To give yourself the tools to create a realistic, believable antagonist, create a mini-biography of your villain: his upbringing and family life, early influences, and harrowing experiences or criminal activities so far. Even more effective is to write it in first-person form, as diary entries filled with complaints, resentments, rants and plans to get even. As Hallie Ephron advises us, “Think about what happened to make that villain the way he is. Was he born bad, or did he sour as a result of some traumatic event? If your villain has a grudge against society, why? If he can’t tolerate being jilted, why?” No need to share your villain’s whole life story with your reader – in fact, I advise against it. But to create a complex, interesting villain, you need to know what drives him to think and act the way he does. Creating a backstory for your antagonist will help you develop a multidimensional, convincing bad guy.

  Many writing gurus advise us to even make the antagonist a bit sympathetic. James Scott Bell says, “The great temptation in creating bad guys is to make them evil through and through. You might think this will make your audience root harder for your hero. More likely, you’re just going to give your book a melodramatic feel. To avoid this, get to know all sides of your bad guy, including the positives.”

  Bell suggests that, after we create a physical impression of our antagonist, we find out what her objective is, dig into her motivation, and create background for her that generates some sympathy – a major turning point from childhood or a powerful secret that can emerge later in the book.

  Not everyone agrees with that approach, however. James Frey says, “in some cases, it is neither necessary nor perhaps even desirable to create the villain as a fully fleshed-out, well-rounded multidimensional character.” Many readers just want to a bad guy they can despise and are not interested in finding out about his inner motives or his deprived childhood. That would dilute their satisfaction in finally seeing him getting his just deserts.

  However, Frey does feel it’s extremely important to create a convincing, truly nasty villain, one who is “ruthless, relentless, and clever and resourceful, as well as being a moral and ethical wack job,” and one who is “willing to crush anyone who gets in his way.”

  As kids, we loved to see good prevail over evil, and the nastier the villain, the harder they fell – and the greater our satisfaction. Perhaps Frey’s “damn good villain” harks back to those times, and his ultimate demise evokes greater reader satisfaction. Forget analyzing the bad guy – just build him up, then take him out!

  On the other hand, many readers today are more sophisticated and want to get away from the caricatures of our popular literary heritage; hence, advice from writers like Ephron and Bell to develop more multidimensional antagonists with a backstory and clear motivations.

  I’d say there’s room for both approaches in modern fiction, and probably the thriller genre favors the “just plain mean and nasty” villain. Unless you’re writing a psychological thriller, maybe don’t get too carried away with a psychological analysis of the bad guy, although you do need to flesh him out and make him multi-dimensional and believable. But most readers don’t want to feel sympathetic toward the villain – they just want to see Jack Reacher, Joe Pike or [fill in your favorite thriller hero or heroine] take them on and kick their butt!

  Resources:

  Hallie Ephron, The Everything Guide to Writing Your First Novel

  James N. Frey, How to Write a Damn Good Thriller

  James Scott Bell, Revision and Self-Editing

  Back to TOC

  PART IV

  HOOK ’EM AND KEEP ’EM WITH TENSION, CONFLICT, & SUSPENSE

  Chapter 7

  CRAFT A KILLER OPENING

  You’ve created a compelling protagonist, sympathetic but with inner conflict and baggage, and a creepy, cunning adversary. You’ve brainstormed “what-ifs” and have come up with a big story quandary with an interesting plot. You’ve thrust your hero or heroine into one nail-biting scene after another. Now it’s time to go back and revise your opening pages to make them as riveting and intriguing as they can be.

  I can’t emphasize enough how critical your first pages are. They can literally make or break your sales for that book – and maybe future ones. Why? Because after glancing at the front and back cover, potential readers, agents, publishers, and buyers will read your opening page or two to decide whether or not to buy your book. Readers today are busier and less patient, and with all the excellent books out there, if they’re not intrigued by the first few pages, they’ll reject yours and go on to another.

  As James N. Frey says, “A gripping opening is not simply a good thing for your story. It’s absolutely essential.”

  But of course don’t get hung up on crafting a brilliant opening right away. First, just get your ideas down and write your story, or most of it, then come back to your opening later, to fine-tune it, amp it up, and polish it to perfection.

  So what are the essential ingredients of a gripping opening?

  Your first page – in fact, your first paragraph – needs to immerse your readers in the story right away, engage them emotionally, and hook them in so they not only want to but need to continue.

  Death is my beat. I make my living from it. I forge my professional reputation on it. I treat it with the passion and precision of an undertaker…

  – Michael Connelly, opening lines for The Poet

  For that to happen, several factors come into play.

  ~ Tell us whose story it is. First, readers want to know right away who’s the protagonist, the one we’ll be rooting for. Put is in the head of the main character in the first sentence, certainly the first paragraphs. Readers expect that the first person they meet is the one they’ll identify with and bond with, so start right out in the point of view of your lead character.

  Chris Mankowski’s last day on the job, two in the afternoon, two hours to go, he got a call to dispose of a bomb.

  – Elmore Leonard, first sentence of Freaky Deaky

  ~ Situate us right away. Readers want to know immediately where and when that first scene is taking place, and what’s going on. So be sure you’ve answered the four W’s within the first few paragraphs: who, what, where, and when – and in an engaging way. Don’t confuse or annoy your readers right off the bat by making them wonder who’s the main person in the story, what’s going on at that moment, and where and when it’s happening.

  Penny Dawson woke and heard something moving furtively in the dark bedroom.

  – Dean Koontz, Darkfall

  ~ But not in a happy scene. Introduce some tension and conflict right away. Your lead character wants or needs something, and it’s not happening. She’s starting to get stressed because...

  Tuesday was a fine California day, full of sunshine and promise, until Harry Lyon had to shoot someone at lunch.

  – Dean Koontz, Dragon Tears

  ~ Make us care about your protagonist.
Give readers a hero they’ll really want to root for and worry about. He should be sympathetic, interesting, and charismatic, but with inner conflict and baggage. Show us his hopes, dreams, worries, and fears as soon as you can.

  I’d never given much thought to how I would die – even though I’d had reason enough in the last few months – but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this.

  – Stephenie Meyer, first line of Twilight

  ~ Give us characters in action. Don’t start with your heroine alone, contemplating her life – at least not for long. That’s too static and just not engaging or dynamic enough. It’s best to put her right away or very soon into a compelling scene with someone else, in real time, with tension, dialogue, actions, and reactions. That way, we get a feel for her personality and a glimpse into her world and her place in it.

  “Well, look what the cat dragged in,” Marla Simms bellowed, giving Sara a pointed look over her silver-rimmed bifocals. The secretary for the police station held a magazine in her arthritic hands, but she set it aside, indicating she had plenty of time to talk.

  Sara forced some cheer into her voice, though she had purposefully timed her visit for Marla’s coffee break. “Hey, Marla. How’re you doing?”

  – Karin Slaughter, first two paragraphs of Indelible

  ~ Avoid neutral, detached descriptions or explanations. Don’t address the readers as an omniscient narrator, telling us about the setting, the weather, or the hero from afar. In fact, don’t tell us anything on the first pages – show us what’s going on through the actions and dialogue of your characters. Filter the descriptions of your hero’s surroundings through his perceptions, reactions, mood, and attitude.