Shepherd's Watch

by Angie Counios

  I don’t think I’ve ever heard Dad talk about Granddad this way.

  Mom takes Dad’s hand. “I don’t think we ever forget the people we lose. I think we’ll always want them back.”

  “So, Mr. S., after all this time, you don’t think your father has ever really gone away?”

  “Only the details of my memories have lessened.”

  “So the idea of Sheri out there…”

  “Will always be with you,” Dad finishes.

  Charlie nods at me and I realize what he’s up to. Although I think he’s sincere about Sheri, he’s got other things on his mind too. One woman is missing and someone else out there has lost a daughter—Tasha or maybe the sister she told us about too—and right now, Charlie and I are the only ones who might be able to get her back. My only fear is that Charlie’s past, his loss, will make him reckless and it’ll get us both in trouble—or worse.

  chapter 100

  It’s cool out by the time we get back to the cabin and Charlie volunteers the two of us to light the firepit while the rest of the family stays inside, giving us a few moments to ourselves. As we build up a small pointed stack of wood, Charlie walks up and hands me my phone. I don’t remember giving it to him, but I no longer question these things.

  “Dial the number,” Charlie says.

  On the screen is a listing for Denise Grassing.

  “Joanna’s mom?”

  He nods. “She’s two hours earlier, so you shouldn’t be waking her.”

  “Charlie, I can’t.”

  “Why not? You want proof that Tasha is Joanna, don’t you?”

  “Yeah, but—”

  “Then call and ask her if her daughter’s room had blue walls.”

  I slip the phone in my pocket and kneel to light the kindling. “Look, I don’t disagree with you. I just think we need to be careful.”

  “Whether or not Tasha is Joanna, it doesn’t change the fact that Denise Grassing is still missing a daughter. Or that another woman is missing.”

  “And you think only you can find them?”

  “No, I think only we can.”

  The wood flares and I throw a few sticks on top.

  “What happened to you, Charlie? Who did you lose?”

  He glares at me.

  “I’m serious. What’s your deal?”

  Charlie doesn’t move, doesn’t change his expression; his face flickers in the shadows of the rising flames.

  “Because you lost someone, didn’t you?” I go on. I’m certain he’s deciding whether or not he trusts me enough to tell me.

  As the fire grows, the heat builds. Charlie takes a step back.

  I throw on a few bigger pieces of wood and come to a decision. “Okay, Charlie. I’ll help you find Tasha. But one of these days—it doesn’t have to be today or tomorrow—you need to be honest with me about your past.”

  chapter 101

  After Charlie heads to bed, I take my phone, step out of the cabin, and walk down to the dock. I cycle through the list of calls and hit dial. I need a plan in place before I do anything else.

  A sleepy voice answers and I pause for a second before plunging in. “Hello, Detective Gekas. It’s Tony Shepherd.”

  “What time is it?” Her tone shifts abruptly, “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing… yet. But I need a favour.”

  “What are you boys up to?” She sounds wide awake now.

  “Nothing,” I protest, “at least, not yet. But I do need to do something and I can’t see the whole situation.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I think Charlie’s not thinking clearly and I’m afraid he’s about to do something stupid.” I feel guilty for going behind his back, but I need to know. “Detective, do you know anything about Charlie’s past?”

  “What are you asking, Anthony?”

  “Did something happen to him when he was younger?”

  “You know I can’t disclose private records.”

  Not helpful, Detective. I try again, “Has he ever lost someone?”

  She gets quiet. “You need to talk to Charles, not me.”

  I know that’s all I’m likely to get.

  “What’s going on, Anthony?”

  “We’re going to try and find someone tomorrow. Maybe two people.” I can’t say it more simply.

  “Who?”

  “A photographer that’s disappeared and a girl who’s been missing for twenty years.”

  There’s a pause, then she says, “I know you think you’re doing what’s right, but there are people—”

  “Detective Gekas, I think we’re the only ones who can help.”

  “Tell the officials what you know—”

  “I’ll keep my phone on me, but I’m turning the ringer off.”

  “Anthony—!”

  “If something goes wrong, track us with it.”

  I hang up on her protests. I set the phone to silent and when I go back up to the cabin, I disconnect the house phone. Maybe it’ll buy Charlie and me enough time before all hell breaks loose.

  chapter 102

  I listen to Charlie toss in bed throughout the night, but when I wake the next day, I’m surprised by how revved up we both are. Once up and caffeinated, we strategize. There are a few things going for us. First, we have some idea of where Tasha might appear, and more importantly, she used the phone once—maybe she will again.

  We pull out Dad’s fishing rods and a small box of tackle. We don’t know how long we need to be out, so pretending to go fishing will give us enough time to be away from the cabin for a while without anyone worrying.

  When Mom sees us step out the door, she orders us to take sunblock and a hat.

  Dad looks at him with sympathy. “If you don’t do it, she’ll harass you for years—”

  “Well, if you wouldn’t be so careless—” Mom says.

  “It was one time—” Dad protests.

  “More than one time. And quit acting like a baby. You whined the whole time your skin was peeling.”

  Charlie grabs a hat and sunscreen from the closet and stands beside Dad, holding the lotion out like he’s in a tv commercial. “Only Solar Bronze can stop the uv light that damages your skin and leads to skin cancer. Look at this before,” he points to himself, “and after,” he points to Dad, “comparison. Terrifying, right?”

  Mom chuckles as Dad pushes him away. “Go, fish, and get out of my hair.”

  Charlie grins as we step outside. “You know they’re just fake arguing so they can have sex while we’re out, right?”

  “Dude! Gross.” Not getting enough sleep hasn’t dampened his attitude.

  When Charlie spots Heather down by the dock, he informs her, “Keep your distance from the cabin for at least an hour.”

  “Why—?”

  “Don’t ask,” I warn her.

  “Why?”

  Charlie winks and she realizes what he’s suggesting. “Jeez, dude! You’re sick.”

  Charlie lets out an exaggerated sigh. “Just trying to protect you young impressionable kids.”

  Heather spies our gear. “You two going fishing?”

  “Gonna try,” I say.

  Charlie sets his rod in the canoe. “I seek the full lake experience.”

  She smiles. “What are you going to do when you have to stick a leech on the line?”

  He stops dead. “You didn’t tell me we had to do that, Shepherd.” He looks at Heather, “You’re joking, right?”

  She just smiles and walks up the path.

  “Shepherd?”

  Now it’s my turn to smile. “You know why Heather’s a good fisherman?”

  “Why?”

  “Because she just caught you hook, line, and sinker.”

  chapter 103

  The day is warm
and bright, not a cloud in the sky. The water is calm—not one scrap of driftwood spoils its surface on our journey. Long strands of weeds sway in the gentle currents of the clear water. I catch a glimpse of a rippling flicker, probably a fish weaving between the waving grasses of the lake bottom, before it’s gone forever.

  “Remember that mysterious hitchhiker?” Charlie’s question comes out of nowhere. “The one on the bridge who disappears when you see him?”

  “Yeah. What about it?”

  “It feels like we’ve picked up a couple of those.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “All we seem to be doing lately is chasing ghosts.”

  “I was thinking the same thing yesterday. We started with Terry—”

  “And now we’ve got Rita.”

  “And we’re not even sure if either of them is connected to Tasha.”

  “Or Joanna.”

  “Or whoever we’re dealing with—”

  “Whomever.”

  I look back at him. “Seriously, dude?”

  “What? Proper grammar matters.”

  I laugh. “Fine. Whomever.”

  He nods in sage agreement, then gets serious. “But we have a lot of unknowns going on and I hate it. It would be nice if some of these questions had answers.”

  He pulls his paddle in, setting it on the gunwale. “I almost called that number myself last night.”

  “Why didn’t you?”

  “Didn’t feel right.”

  “But you were hoping I would?”

  “Maybe… no. It would’ve been like ripping the bandage off a twenty-year-old wound.”

  “But to have an answer, any answer…”

  He nods. “A little less uncertainty would be nice.” He picks up his paddle again and pulls it through the water. “I don’t like going in when there’s so much we don’t know—”

  “But everything comes back to these woods.”

  “And Tasha seems to be our only way in.”

  I slow the canoe to a crawl as we approach the bank with the fallen log.

  “Let’s keep some distance between us and the shore,” Charlie says.

  I’m in full agreement. The more space between us and whatever craziness is going on in the woods, the better.

  chapter 104

  Although we brought the fishing rods as an excuse, we might actually have a long wait until Tasha phones or appears, so I work on attaching a hook.

  “Your sister was kidding about the suckers, right?”

  I grin. “They work better than worms.”

  He cringes.

  “Relax,” I wave a hand at him. “I don’t have any and I’m in no big hurry to deal with a fish anyway.”

  I hand him a rod and he fails at a couple of casts, splashing the tip of his pole into the water. Once I’m ready, I show him how to do it properly.

  “Don’t whip it. Clean steady motion, wide arc, then release.” I demonstrate and cast my hook a good distance from the boat.

  Charlie gives it another try and this time he pulls off a nice one.

  “Good job. Now don’t let it sink too much or you’ll get caught in the weeds.” I demonstrate reeling my hook back in.

  We spend the morning casting, with a steady eye on the shoreline. The waves slosh against the aluminum hull, getting amplified and echoing as they do. Charlie settles into the bow and, what with the constant rocking back and forth, I think he might fall asleep. He probably would if it weren’t for the constant whir and click of his fishing rod.

  Occasionally, I set down my pole and pick up the oar, paddling us back into position when the currents carry us too far downstream.

  When the sun is high in the sky, I check my phone. “Almost noon.”

  Charlie pulls off his hat to wipe his brow. “Damn, it’s hot.”

  “Did you put on some sunscreen?”

  “Yes, Mom.”

  “Hey, you come home looking like a roasted beet, it’ll be both our asses.”

  “True.” He slips his cap back on. “But roasted beets sound good right about now.”

  “Really?”

  He shrugs. “I like my colourful veggies.”

  I laugh but stop quickly. Someone’s watching us from the edge of the woods.

  “Charlie.”

  He glances up, then reels in his line and sets down the pole. We study the person, but they’re too far away and shadowed for us to see what they look like.

  “What now?” I ask.

  Charlie waves. The figure doesn’t respond. He tries again. The person raises an arm in what might be a friendly gesture.

  “Guess it’s time to introduce ourselves,” says Charlie.

  chapter 105

  We paddle to shore at a steady pace, not wanting to frighten whoever it is off. I try to work out all of the possible ways this could go wrong, but I don’t stop rowing.

  The closer we get, the more sure I am that it’s a woman in her twenties. Tasha. She’s hiding behind a tree, but even so I can tell she’s short and slight, and her light brown hair is worn in a long braid.

  “Tasha?” Charlie asks.

  She nods hesitantly.

  Charlie turns to me. “Shepherd, you need to talk.”

  “Why me?”

  “She’s already talked to you. Now say something.”

  I wave. “I’m Tony. We spoke on the phone?”

  She watches me from behind the safety of her tree.

  “And this is Charlie.” I point to him and he waves.

  My biggest fear is that we rush this and freak her out. I pull in my oar so that the canoe glides gently toward shore. Charlie looks over his shoulder and follows my lead.

  The boat thunks against the sand in the shallow water and we don’t move, just sit there and watch her. She’s curled around the tree, keeping it between her and us.

  “We’re going to get out of the canoe now,” I say finally. “Is that all right?”

  She thinks it over before nodding her agreement.

  Charlie glances back at me and we both climb out. We’re now onshore, and things could go badly at any moment—we’re pretty exposed here and it would be tough to get away safely. But I inhale slowly and deeply and do my best to stay calm; any sign of nervousness could spook her.

  I lead the way up the sandy bank and we stand at the top, deciding our next move. Charlie walks over to the log and I see her face tighten. He ignores this and reaches into the hollow, pulling out his phone and the book. “Is this yours?”

  The young woman nods again.

  “Do you like to read?” he asks, studying his cell before turning it off and slipping it into his pocket.

  Another nod.

  “Is The Great Gatsby your favourite?”

  “Yes.” It’s the first word she’s said. Charlie’s making progress.

  “Yeah, it’s pretty good,” he agrees. “What do you think is the best part?”

  Tasha slides around the tree into full view, leaning against it but still holding on tightly. Her eyes are brown and she’s wearing a pair of jeans and an unzipped purple hoodie, neither of which fit her right. Her shoes are filthy and look like they might be too small.

  “The green…” She freezes, like she’s said too much.

  But Charlie knows what she’s thinking and finishes her thought. “The green light across the bay?”

  She smiles and dimples appear in her cheeks—but she catches herself and stops.

  Charlie looks out across the water before turning back to Tasha. “I bet you see lights across the lake at night?”

  The dimples return and she nods.

  “Do you ever want to go see them?”

  A grimace crosses her face and she draws back behind the tree.

  “What’s wrong, Tasha?” I ask.
/>
  “We shouldn’t talk about this,” she says.

  “Why not? Because of your mother?”

  “We aren’t allowed to leave.”

  “What does she do if you try?”

  She ignores me, suddenly emboldened, and stands straight. “Man is wrong,” she says forcefully, “you are men.” It seems as if she’s just realized this now.

  She looks like she’s going to retreat, but Charlie calls out, “Tasha, why is man wrong?”

  “Man is the end of innocence; he is the darkness. Man is the Fall.” She recites this flatly and I feel nervous, ready to take a step back myself, but Charlie holds his ground.

  “You read that as well, didn’t you?”

  She nods.

  “The Lord of the Flies? You have that book too?”

  She watches him with interest, then nods yet again.

  “Did your mother teach you these things?”

  “Yes.”

  “She told you to avoid man?”

  “Yes.”

  “Is that why she tells you not to leave?”

  Tasha nods once more.

  “Since we are men, do you want us to go away?”

  She thinks about this, hiding behind the tree. There’s a mushroom by her foot and she takes note of it. She kneels down to pick it, sniffing it before breaking it in half and popping it in her mouth. Finally, she shakes her head—maybe she’s made up her mind that we aren’t a threat.

  Charlie sits in the dirt and I feel awkward hovering over him, so I sit down too.

  Charlie speaks again. “You said you remember blue walls?”

  “Yes…” We can see her mind turning, remembering something from the distant past. “I dream of them…”

  “Do you think they were the walls of your room?”

  I see conflict in her eyes.

  “Mother tells me they’re in my imagination only. That I should forget about them. And I try—”

  “But you can’t.”

  She shakes her head and I see sadness in her eyes.

  I can’t imagine what she’s been through, but now I know exactly why we’re here. “Tasha, I can’t promise you that we can take you back to the room with the blue walls. But we’ll try to help you get back to… to the woman who lived there with you.”